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Not here, still making things unpleasant. Went down, he is on crapper, for 45 minutes crabbing at nursing home staff. Room reeks of piss, Ah the memories. Mom is tense, upset, feels guilty for putting Daddy in a home, all alone, 24/7 care, three meals a day to the tune of 12 K a month, while he clothes get shabbier and shabbier. Everything has to be PERFECT! So she snaps and snarls at me as I try and help cover phone, while she fusses over how much to help G with opening his presents. too much, he'll be emasculate, too little and he won't be able to GET the damn paper off the gifts. Another batch of books he is no longer able to physically hold any more. Fussing about saving the God Damn paper, a habit of 80+ years. I leave off and on for air and AIR. He gets all flirty talking to me, explaining that he tells EVERYONE, that the small pillow he uses for his arm, was made by his granddaughter for him! It wasn't. I made it for a throw pillow in the room he vacated last February! In anticipation of family members/ house guests coming for his funeral. Oh such hopes I had... Anyhow. Roads O.K. He likes the stuff he got. Mom stopped snarking at me. There was a wall poster for people to sign on one of the lunch room doors: "What I am thankful for..." I didn't touch it, but thought. I am thankful Grandma invested her money and scrimped and saved so conspicuously for decades so that we could afford to put Grandpa in a nursing home and NOT have to deal with him anymore! I am going to look forward to 2016, see what I can do to improve my situation here in some way. Hope things will be a bit easier for me and my Mom.
I hope everyone has a happy and safe holiday and 2016 brings many good things and experiences we can all look back on with joy. Jen
There are two days in every week that we should not worry about, two days that should be kept free from fear and apprehension.
One is yesterday, with its mistakes and cares, it's faults and blunders, its aches and pains. Yesterday has passed, forever beyond our control.
All the money in the world cannot bring back yesterday. We cannot undo a single act we performed. Nor can we erase a single word we've said yesterday is gone!
The other day we shouldn't worry about is tomorrow, with its impossible adversaries, its burden, its hopeful promise and poor performance. Tomorrow is beyond our control.
Tomorrow's sun will rise either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds, but it will rise. And until it does, we have no stake in tomorrow, for it is yet unborn.
This leaves only one day -- today. Any person can fight the battles of just one day. It is only when we add the burdens of yesterday and tomorrow that we break down.
It is not the experience of today that drives people mad -- it is the remorse of bitterness for something which happened yesterday, and the dread of what tomorrow may bring. Let us therefore, live one day at a time!
Merry Christmas to all of you lovely caregivers from up in the state of Michigan where we have no snow and it was almost 60 degrees today but down to 38 right now. hugs to all. luvCuz
Just want you all to know I think of you often and pray that you are able to find peace and joy in your lives during and after caregiving. This will be my 4th Christmas without my dad and I still find myself shedding some tears at not being able to celebrate a holiday with him. I don't miss the caregiving but I do miss his smile. Hope you all have a very Merry Christmas and a New Year that brings you some happiness!!! Love ya, Kuli
Jen! Enjoy your Christmas Eve with your mom. I bet that after 8 years of that misery some of your life now must feel surreal.
Watched the Curb Your Enthusiasm episode, 'Mary Joseph and Larry' last night and we laughed our backsides off.
Been watching Seinfeld on Hulu and I had forgotten what a perfectly written show that was.
Ol Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld. Good for fighting the blahs for sure.
Been wondering about Austin too! June! If this gets to you somehow give us a shout and let us know how you are getting on with everything!
We have the Flag half mast here at the marina because of the folks that got bombed to bits in Afghanistan. There's an Agent who lives close and has done 3 tours over there and 4 of those folks were his friends.
One of the boaters asked why the flag was lowered and I told him and then came inside to try and find the story on one of the streaming news channels on Apple TV.
Waaaay down on the list: after Trump Trump Trump Miss Universe Trump Trump etc etc and that was the online CBSN.
Ya people, we're still at War.
Nothing we can do but watch a Seinfeld episode and be thankful that somebody is out there trying to keep us safe and allowing us to actually be able to laugh.
And Spread the Word. There are still men and women over there in the trenches just like there are men and women over here deep in the trenches of caregiving.
I must be feeling better. I am starting to Care again.
Merry crappness bobbie good god that sounds awful and definitely in keeping with the threads topic. Ewwww! Shoveling snow not turds here. Been worse years. Have Christmas Eve back just me and my mom after 8 years of misery! For that I am truly thankful! Aaaaaa mennnnn. Best Wishes to everyone! 2016! Jen
They sent me my old password and I was able to get on with my old sign in. Yay. Would miss all that stuff that I have already collected here and there.
The man in my life is helping his mom deal with his step-dad who is getting to the stage where he will have to be placed. It is a brutal thing all around and brings up so many crazy memories but as I think I mentioned some time ago, at least I have been able to say: Don't do what I did with this and that. I learned a better way and of course that was with the help of this site and the amazing caregivers who populated this thread for so long.
Jen is right, things change and we change along with them but some of us are still very interested and care very much about what is happening with those that we became tight with.
It meant a lot to me to meet Deef this past summer, and see her house and beautiful garden and family and hear about her life. I am hoping to be able to go back to the Kushi next year and maybe Deef and I will be able to connect again. She was an amazing Hostess to me.
I think of Linda! Woot! and remember Miz? from the very beginning?
I know that there's a group on fb but I guess I just never got into fb.
I wonder about Cricket and Christine and Rosella and Anne and hope all are doing well. I think of Diane whose user name was Flex and remember that I got to meet her and her James at the boatyard where I lived for two and a half years after mom died.
ok, boater drama. We are a TINY marina. Sometimes there may be only one couple on their boat on the dock. There's a guy here with the explosive poops. He can ruin a toilet 6 times a day. Finally, after about 5 weeks of this, we had enough of trying to scrub the hopper 6 times a day and I took Captain Sh!tstain aside and told him that there was Clorox Clean up, paper towels and a brush. Get on it or get out.
Since he doesn't have Dementia he got on it and the hopper has stayed clean. Sure wish everything was that easy.
You know, I think I am just gonna give in to it SS. Maybe I will start discussing my bowel habits and happenings just as a matter of course. Not wait for old age infancy to set in, just bring it up like the weather in general conversation... "Well I had a front move though last night, blew out all the backed up inversion and cleared everything right up. Expect some rain later to day..." Jen
The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.
Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."
The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”
Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”
The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”
Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.
Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”
Hi Jen, I haven't been on the grossed out thread for a while. I just read your long post and wanted you to know I was thinking about you. I am about a year ahead of you I think from what you describe. Not sure if it is your grandpa or your father. Anyway, I cared for both my Mom and Dad. Dad went into the NH in 2011. Same situation with the care. Sometimes they laughed at him or just ignored him etc...He too described his bowel movements. Eewwwww! May we never do that! Anyway, I went to see him, decorated his room, did his laundry, made some of his favorite food while carting my mother around who complained about everything. It was exhausting never mind trying to have a life of your own. He passed last November. So three months after Dad passes, Mom has a stroke. Recovers, then 2 months later has another series of really bad strokes. Guess where she is? Yup. In the same NH. Now I go to see her, decorate her room and do her laundry. Deja vu. Hang in there kid. Thinking of you.
Hang in there Jen. We are still here yet. My brother is still on the downward slide. He was at 318# but got down to 304# in a week by pee pills but they said he was losing weight to fast and was getting dehydrated. He can hardly walk anymore and is about one click away from cardiac arrest. Really nothing they can do anymore. Hugs to all. luvCuz
Hi Jen, my days of 24/7 are gone too. Now hoping to find an opportunity to make up alot of lost ground of the past four years. Want to return to my career and use those upgraded and updated skills I so dearly still need to pay for.
He's not dead yet. Visit, put up decorations. Hilarious. Last week, Mom said "WE need to make some decorations for Grandpa's room." "WE have some colored paper and WE can make ring lengths..." In this instance, "WE" means: I want you to do this, as I am not going to buy, or spent hours making Christmas decorations for Dadddeeesss room, esp if it may cut into my TV viewing time. So. Jenny does it again, and guess what, they are not perfect, she doesn't mention it again, gets a grumpy look on her face and is annoyed I take them down today and hang the imperfect, shiny green and red rings with little presents hanging from them on his notice board, next to pictures of Great-Great Grand children, long dead relatives. The baby pics are at least three years old, as the parents can't seem to find the time to shoot any more recent ones over here for him. Don't they take thousands of pictures these days? What do I know. Anyhow, Mom just watches me pin the less than wonderful Christmas ring strings up. I can positively smell the disappointment coming off her... Ma, you want perfect, you can, A: do it yourself. B: buy the god damn die cut perfection decorations! Oh, and they are raising the bed per day cost at the nursing home. Wonderful. Probably about 13+ dollars. Why not, everything's going up. Except his funds pahahahahaaaa. And even if he does blow through the money totally. He will go right onto Medicare and the only note in the transition will be a slightly less ass kissing demeanor of the general staff when he is no longer "Private Pay". Between not keeping track of his pills, eye rolling when he needs assistance ( you know, what they are paid for) using his supplies for other patients, letting him sit for HOURS on end in the wheel chair, in a room with notices on the walls polity asking them to place him in his recliner after lunch... I mean, where would the lower grade of care come from? Giving in when he refuses baths for two weeks in a row? Over looking oozing sores? Laughing when he describes his bowls movements to all and sundry. He "did a snake about that long ( holds hands up ten inches apart) this mornin." He says as his roommate #5 rolled in with guests. Roommate is happy, he is going back to assisted living. Two other rooms cleared out, G says. I almost get the feeling, he is on some level still thinking he doesn't belong there, and might come back here...He moved in in February. No old man, you are there to stay. Till you go... He was depressed today, doy. Mom tried to cover it up, turned on TV, then rolled him out of the room into lunch. I just clean his glasses off, wash out the razor. adjust my imperfect holiday decorations and wait to go home. Yeah, I know, things are tough all over. Another rejection on novel. eh. Keep on moving forward. like anything else is an option? I wonder how long till the poor woman visiting G's roommate figured our what he meant, talking about his "snake in the toilet this mornin..."? Beh.
Hello to everyone. Hope all is good with you or bearable. Miss the cardinals Deef, How are things in Mass? Hi to Bobby and cuz and Mame and Rip and Austin, glad and para.
No the Grossed Thread is not what it was four years ago, but how can it be, are any of us where we were four years back? We came together at a TIME in our lives and offered support and laughs and made friends, and met misery with humor, useful tips, sympathy and hope. Time changes. I sincerely wish everyone who ever swung by the Grossed Thread well and I am grateful I got to meet and talk to them and know them in what ever way I was able. Not everyone you meet in life goes with you all through the journey, but sometimes, a kind word or gesture can last a lifetime in the remembering of it. Jen, Still here, sort of...
Hey Linda everything is great up here in Michigan. Our warm weather is leaving fast. 67 right now but going down to the 40's with rain and high winds starting tonight. Put my boat away today so now just waiting for the lakes to get hard so we can start fishin again. Hugs your way. luvCuz.
Hey Linda! Good to see you and good to hear what's going on. Ya, I remember when we were all in the trenches and this was a lifesaver for me and I loved hanging out with everyone.
Maybe some folks will let us know how they're doing. I still think of everyone a LOT.
hello , thought id swing by and see how everyone s doing . cuz u amaze me with your jokes , read n smile or giggle . jen - how is everything up at your way ? i sure miss begin here , i remmy the days where i can not get off here cuz we all chime in every five mins lol , we d say ohh gotta fix dad something to eat and zoom back here in an hr , carry on and havin a pity happy party here , was even funner with TED ! often wonder how is he ,,,, we r doing ok , been busy choppin up firewoods , got about 10 ricks , need 5 more ricks , took my hubby to dr the other day , scoped inside his bladder and there is a pea size growth in there , on the 18 th he will have biospy done to see what it is , lord ! one thing after anuther .... still havent put moms house on the market , bil finaly moved out , so soon we will be busy cleaning and put em up for sale , be glad when thats over ... austin- how r u doing ? got plenty of fire wood ? hope so , think we prob will have a nasty winter , ill have to go find bobbie and stay on her boat barefootin and coffee in my hand , oh it was a pleasure paradise get away ,, im too old for this cold winter , barf , its been nice here , indian summer is leavin tnite and it will rain and get cold , you guys stay safe and warm . love u all xoxo
When I'm an old lady, I'll live with each kid, And bring so much happiness just as they did. I want to pay back all the joy they've provided. Returning each deed! Oh, they'll be so excited! When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
I'll write on the walls with reds, whites and blues, And I'll bounce on the furniture wearing my shoes. I'll drink from the carton and then leave it out. I'll stuff all the toilets and oh, how they'll shout! When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
When they're on the phone and just out of reach, I'll get into things like sugar and bleach. Oh, they'll snap their fingers and then shake their head, When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
When they cook dinner and call me to eat, I'll not eat my green beans or salad or meat, I'll gag on my okra, spill milk on the table, And when they get angry I'll run if I'm able! When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
I'll sit close to the TV, through channels I'll click, I'll cross both eyes just to see if they stick. I'll take off my socks and throw one away, And play in the mud 'til the end of the day! When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
And later in bed, I'll lay back and sigh, I'll thank God in prayer and then close my eyes. My kids will look down with a smile slowly creeping, And say with a groan, "She's so sweet when she's sleeping!" -by Joanne Bailey Baxter
A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with their husband. The women were asked,
"How many of you love your husband?" All the women raised their hands. Then they were asked, "When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?" Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some can't remember.
The women then were told to take out their cell phones and text to their husband: ........ "i love you, sweetheart."
The women then were instructed to exchange phones with another person, and to read aloud the text message they received in response to their message.
Below are 12 replies; some are hilarious. if you have been married for quite a while....a sign of true love.... who else would reply in such a succinct and honest way?
1. Who the hell is this?
2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
3. Yeah, and i love you too. what's wrong?
4. What now? Did you crash the car again?
5. I don't understand what you mean?
6. What the hell did you do now?
8. Don't beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?
9. Am i dreaming?
10. If you don't tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die!
11. I thought we agreed you wouldn't drink during the day.
12. Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn't she?
An old geezer became very bored in retirement and decided to open a medical clinic.
He put a sign up outside that said: "Dr.Geezer's clinic. Get your treatment for $500, if not cured, get back $1,000." Doctor "Young," who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr.Geezer's clinic. Dr. Young: "Dr.Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me ??" Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth." Dr. Young: Aaagh !! -- "This is Gasoline!" Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back.That will be $500." Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money. Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything." Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth." Dr. Young: "Oh, no you don't, -- that is Gasoline!" Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back . That will be $500." Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days. Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become weak --- I can hardly see anything !!!! Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that so, " Here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill) Dr. Young: "But this is only $10! Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500."
Moral of story -- Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an "old Geezer"
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II. How We Are Paid.
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III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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Anyhow. Roads O.K. He likes the stuff he got. Mom stopped snarking at me.
There was a wall poster for people to sign on one of the lunch room doors: "What I am thankful for..." I didn't touch it, but thought. I am thankful Grandma invested her money and scrimped and saved so conspicuously for decades so that we could afford to put Grandpa in a nursing home and NOT have to deal with him anymore!
I am going to look forward to 2016, see what I can do to improve my situation here in some way. Hope things will be a bit easier for me and my Mom.
I hope everyone has a happy and safe holiday and 2016 brings many good things and experiences we can all look back on with joy. Jen
author unknown
There are two days in every week that we should not
worry about, two days that should be kept free from fear
and apprehension.
One is yesterday, with its mistakes and cares, it's faults
and blunders, its aches and pains. Yesterday has passed,
forever beyond our control.
All the money in the world cannot bring back yesterday.
We cannot undo a single act we performed. Nor can
we erase a single word we've said yesterday is gone!
The other day we shouldn't worry about is tomorrow,
with its impossible adversaries, its burden, its hopeful
promise and poor performance. Tomorrow is
beyond our control.
Tomorrow's sun will rise either in splendor or
behind a mask of clouds, but it will rise.
And until it does, we have no stake in tomorrow,
for it is yet unborn.
This leaves only one day -- today. Any person
can fight the battles of just one day. It is only
when we add the burdens of yesterday and
tomorrow that we break down.
It is not the experience of today that drives
people mad -- it is the remorse of bitterness
for something which happened yesterday,
and the dread of what tomorrow may bring.
Let us therefore, live one day at a time!
luvCuz
Jen! Enjoy your Christmas Eve with your mom.
I bet that after 8 years of that misery some of your life now must feel surreal.
Watched the Curb Your Enthusiasm episode, 'Mary Joseph and Larry' last night and we laughed our backsides off.
Been watching Seinfeld on Hulu and I had forgotten what a perfectly written show that was.
Ol Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld. Good for fighting the blahs for sure.
Been wondering about Austin too!
June! If this gets to you somehow give us a shout and let us know how you are getting on with everything!
We have the Flag half mast here at the marina because of the folks that got bombed to bits in Afghanistan.
There's an Agent who lives close and has done 3 tours over there and 4 of those folks were his friends.
One of the boaters asked why the flag was lowered and I told him and then came inside to try and find the story on one of the streaming news channels on Apple TV.
Waaaay down on the list: after Trump Trump Trump Miss Universe Trump Trump etc etc and that was the online CBSN.
Ya people, we're still at War.
Nothing we can do but watch a Seinfeld episode and be thankful that somebody is out there trying to keep us safe and allowing us to actually be able to laugh.
And Spread the Word. There are still men and women over there in the trenches just like there are men and women over here deep in the trenches of caregiving.
I must be feeling better. I am starting to Care again.
lovbob
Shoveling snow not turds here. Been worse years.
Have Christmas Eve back just me and my mom after 8 years of misery! For that I am truly thankful! Aaaaaa mennnnn.
Best Wishes to everyone! 2016! Jen
Hey there SS!
They sent me my old password and I was able to get on with my old sign in.
Yay. Would miss all that stuff that I have already collected here and there.
The man in my life is helping his mom deal with his step-dad who is getting to the stage where he will have to be placed.
It is a brutal thing all around and brings up so many crazy memories but as I think I mentioned some time ago, at least I have been able to say:
Don't do what I did with this and that.
I learned a better way and of course that was with the help of this site and the amazing caregivers who populated this thread for so long.
Jen is right, things change and we change along with them but some of us are still very interested and care very much about what is happening with those that we became tight with.
It meant a lot to me to meet Deef this past summer, and see her house and beautiful garden and family and hear about her life.
I am hoping to be able to go back to the Kushi next year and maybe Deef and I will be able to connect again.
She was an amazing Hostess to me.
I think of Linda! Woot!
and remember Miz? from the very beginning?
I know that there's a group on fb but I guess I just never got into fb.
I wonder about Cricket and Christine and Rosella and Anne and hope all are doing well.
I think of Diane whose user name was Flex and remember that I got to meet her and her James at the boatyard where I lived for two and a half years after mom died.
ok, boater drama.
We are a TINY marina. Sometimes there may be only one couple on their boat on the dock.
There's a guy here with the explosive poops. He can ruin a toilet 6 times a day.
Finally, after about 5 weeks of this, we had enough of trying to scrub the hopper 6 times a day and I took Captain Sh!tstain aside and told him that there was Clorox Clean up, paper towels and a brush. Get on it or get out.
Since he doesn't have Dementia he got on it and the hopper has stayed clean.
Sure wish everything was that easy.
Gross enough?
hahahaha
lovbob
-SS
"Well I had a front move though last night, blew out all the backed up inversion and cleared everything right up. Expect some rain later to day..." Jen
The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.
Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."
The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”
Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”
The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”
Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.
Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”
The teacher sat down and cried.
I haven't been on the grossed out thread for a while. I just read your long post and wanted you to know I was thinking about you. I am about a year ahead of you I think from what you describe. Not sure if it is your grandpa or your father. Anyway, I cared for both my Mom and Dad. Dad went into the NH in 2011. Same situation with the care. Sometimes they laughed at him or just ignored him etc...He too described his bowel movements. Eewwwww! May we never do that! Anyway, I went to see him, decorated his room, did his laundry, made some of his favorite food while carting my mother around who complained about everything. It was exhausting never mind trying to have a life of your own. He passed last November. So three months after Dad passes, Mom has a stroke. Recovers, then 2 months later has another series of really bad strokes. Guess where she is? Yup. In the same NH. Now I go to see her, decorate her room and do her laundry. Deja vu. Hang in there kid. Thinking of you.
xo
-SS
Thinking of you all. Jen
Hugs to all.
luvCuz
Hello to everybody else too!
So. Jenny does it again, and guess what, they are not perfect, she doesn't mention it again, gets a grumpy look on her face and is annoyed I take them down today and hang the imperfect, shiny green and red rings with little presents hanging from them on his notice board, next to pictures of Great-Great Grand children, long dead relatives. The baby pics are at least three years old, as the parents can't seem to find the time to shoot any more recent ones over here for him. Don't they take thousands of pictures these days? What do I know. Anyhow,
Mom just watches me pin the less than wonderful Christmas ring strings up. I can positively smell the disappointment coming off her...
Ma, you want perfect, you can, A: do it yourself. B: buy the god damn die cut perfection decorations!
Oh, and they are raising the bed per day cost at the nursing home. Wonderful.
Probably about 13+ dollars. Why not, everything's going up. Except his funds pahahahahaaaa. And even if he does blow through the money totally. He will go right onto Medicare and the only note in the transition will be a slightly less ass kissing demeanor of the general staff when he is no longer "Private Pay". Between not keeping track of his pills, eye rolling when he needs assistance ( you know, what they are paid for) using his supplies for other patients, letting him sit for HOURS on end in the wheel chair, in a room with notices on the walls polity asking them to place him in his recliner after lunch... I mean, where would the lower grade of care come from? Giving in when he refuses baths for two weeks in a row? Over looking oozing sores? Laughing when he describes his bowls movements to all and sundry. He "did a snake about that long ( holds hands up ten inches apart) this mornin." He says as his roommate #5 rolled in with guests.
Roommate is happy, he is going back to assisted living. Two other rooms cleared out, G says. I almost get the feeling, he is on some level still thinking he doesn't belong there, and might come back here...He moved in in February. No old man, you are there to stay. Till you go...
He was depressed today, doy. Mom tried to cover it up, turned on TV, then rolled him out of the room into lunch. I just clean his glasses off, wash out the razor. adjust my imperfect holiday decorations and wait to go home. Yeah, I know, things are tough all over.
Another rejection on novel. eh. Keep on moving forward. like anything else is an option?
I wonder how long till the poor woman visiting G's roommate figured our what he meant, talking about his "snake in the toilet this mornin..."? Beh.
Hello to everyone. Hope all is good with you or bearable. Miss the cardinals Deef, How are things in Mass?
Hi to Bobby and cuz and Mame and Rip and Austin, glad and para.
No the Grossed Thread is not what it was four years ago, but how can it be, are any of us where we were four years back? We came together at a TIME in our lives and offered support and laughs and made friends, and met misery with humor, useful tips, sympathy and hope. Time changes. I sincerely wish everyone who ever swung by the Grossed Thread well and I am grateful I got to meet and talk to them and know them in what ever way I was able. Not everyone you meet in life goes with you all through the journey, but sometimes, a kind word or gesture can last a lifetime in the remembering of it. Jen, Still here, sort of...
A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.
When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake.
He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons.
So he knocked on the door to clarify the point.
The blond came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your note asking
me to leave 25 gallons of milk.
Did you mean 2.5 gallons?"
The blonde said, "No, I want 25 gallons. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath so I can look young and beautiful again."
The milkman asked, "Do you want it "pasteurized?"
Wait for it …
The blonde said, "No, just up to my tits...I can splash it on my eyes if I need to!"
luvCuz.
Good to see you and good to hear what's going on.
Ya, I remember when we were all in the trenches and this was a lifesaver for me and I loved hanging out with everyone.
Maybe some folks will let us know how they're doing. I still think of everyone a LOT.
lovbob
jen - how is everything up at your way ? i sure miss begin here , i remmy the days where i can not get off here cuz we all chime in every five mins lol , we d say ohh gotta fix dad something to eat and zoom back here in an hr , carry on and havin a pity happy party here , was even funner with TED ! often wonder how is he ,,,,
we r doing ok , been busy choppin up firewoods , got about 10 ricks , need 5 more ricks ,
took my hubby to dr the other day , scoped inside his bladder and there is a pea size growth in there , on the 18 th he will have biospy done to see what it is , lord ! one thing after anuther ....
still havent put moms house on the market , bil finaly moved out , so soon we will be busy cleaning and put em up for sale , be glad when thats over ...
austin- how r u doing ? got plenty of fire wood ? hope so , think we prob will have a nasty winter , ill have to go find bobbie and stay on her boat barefootin and coffee in my hand , oh it was a pleasure paradise get away ,, im too old for this cold winter , barf , its been nice here , indian summer is leavin tnite and it will rain and get cold ,
you guys stay safe and warm . love u all xoxo
Woman - Yes, that is why I don't go there anymore.
Man - Can I buy you a drink?
Woman - I think I would rather have the money!
Man - Will you go out with me this Saturday?
Woman - Sorry, I'm having a headache this weekend.
Man - Is this seat empty?
Woman - Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man - So what do you do for a living?
Woman - I'm a female impersonator.
And bring so much happiness just as they did.
I want to pay back all the joy they've provided.
Returning each deed! Oh, they'll be so excited!
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
I'll write on the walls with reds, whites and blues,
And I'll bounce on the furniture wearing my shoes.
I'll drink from the carton and then leave it out.
I'll stuff all the toilets and oh, how they'll shout!
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
When they're on the phone and just out of reach,
I'll get into things like sugar and bleach.
Oh, they'll snap their fingers and then shake their head,
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
When they cook dinner and call me to eat,
I'll not eat my green beans or salad or meat,
I'll gag on my okra, spill milk on the table,
And when they get angry I'll run if I'm able!
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
I'll sit close to the TV, through channels I'll click,
I'll cross both eyes just to see if they stick.
I'll take off my socks and throw one away,
And play in the mud 'til the end of the day!
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.
And later in bed, I'll lay back and sigh,
I'll thank God in prayer and then close my eyes.
My kids will look down with a smile slowly creeping,
And say with a groan, "She's so sweet when she's sleeping!"
-by Joanne Bailey Baxter
Like Mortal Diaries
A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with their husband.
The women were asked,
"How many of you love your husband?" All the women raised their hands. Then they were asked, "When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?"
Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some can't remember.
The women then were told to take out their cell phones
and text to their husband: ........ "i love you, sweetheart."
The women then were instructed to exchange phones with another person, and to read aloud
the text message they received in response to their message.
Below are 12 replies; some are hilarious. if you have been married for quite a while....a sign of true love....
who else would reply in such a succinct and honest way?
1. Who the hell is this?
2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
3. Yeah, and i love you too. what's wrong?
4. What now? Did you crash the car again?
5. I don't understand what you mean?
6. What the hell did you do now?
8. Don't beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?
9. Am i dreaming?
10. If you don't tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die!
11. I thought we agreed you wouldn't drink during the day.
12. Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn't she?
Thanks. We all needed that.
lovbob
He put a sign up outside that said: "Dr.Geezer's clinic. Get your treatment for $500, if not cured, get back $1,000."
Doctor "Young," who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr.Geezer's clinic.
Dr. Young: "Dr.Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me ??"
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."
Dr. Young: Aaagh !! -- "This is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back.That will be $500."
Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money.
Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything."
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."
Dr. Young: "Oh, no you don't, -- that is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back . That will be $500."
Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become weak --- I can hardly see anything !!!!
Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that so, " Here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill)
Dr. Young: "But this is only $10!
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500."
Moral of story -- Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an "old Geezer"
They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl's place.
A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands.
He then takes off his trousers and again washes his hands.
The girl has been watching him and says,
"You must be a dentist."
The guy, surprised, says,
"Yes .... How did you figure that out?"
"Easy," she replies. "You keep washing your hands."
One thing leads to another and they make love.
After it's over the girl says, "You must be a really good dentist."
The guy, now with an inflated ego, says,
"Sure - I'm a good dentist. How did you figure that out?"
The girl replies....
"I Didn't feel a thing."