Follow
Share
This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Sorry for your pain, Juju. Know how much you love your mom and have sacrificed for her.
(2)
Report

Juju it is sad to realize the end is in sight but it does give you a definite goal. And that is to make Mom's time as peaceful and comfortable as possible.
Your mindset has to change. Stop trying to make Mom do things that are "good for her" and let her make her own choices. If she spits her B/P pills out so be it. What is the worst that will happen? It is in God's hands as it always had been.
Blessings teasure every minute.
(4)
Report

Well we had our hospice eval yesterday and just as I thought she is ready!
Sad day for me today......
(1)
Report

Widowhood

How about this one!

An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time.

Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married.

Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work, they discussed finances, living arrangements and so on...

Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship.

“How do you feel about sex?” he asked, rather tentatively.

“I would like it infrequently” she replied.

The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, adjusted his glasses, leaned over towards her and whispered – “Is that one word or two?”
(1)
Report

but the lakes are beautiful in summer cuz! say, summer in Mich and winter in Hawaii? or The Bahamas...

hey juju you sound like you are full on now, you could take on other people with a van and a lift!

No he is not in a home...he is in the living room...waiting to go to adult day care...we'll go run errands...what ever...

I hope the East Coast storm moved fast and OUT of the area!

It is 45 degrees here and rains every other day, like lat March...

Good mid Feb week all...Gonna go buy a Powerball ticket see how much worse my life can get...
(1)
Report

Cuz thank you for being there for all of us-your jokes help so much to pause and laugh.
(1)
Report

Ok bob My boss helped me out with the charter, it could possible be purchased but it would be too choppy rough in that size boat (for momma)....so off to other options to put the last piece of this puzzle together!
I am finally today packing up for a visit tomorrow to my bff to do Xmas gifts...could not go anywhere with moms leg for a while (and bustin my butt to get this home sold and new one bought) I can exhale finally!!! ahhhhhhhhh

Love you all!!!
Peace
Juju
(1)
Report

Congratulations my Cuz!

You have the most amazing of all Boat Time and you know that I am here with this boat to back it up! Come on down!
Thanks Cuz for being here and thanks to everyone for being here.

I hope that we keep going and my best wishes and love go out to all.

lovbob
(1)
Report

I had to post one more so I could get the legendary BOAT TIME.
I remember quite a while ago the question of would this site still be active and if we would hit the 30,000 mark? Well ladies I think we have made this mark and lets set another goal. Hugs to everyone of you caregivers both past and present. May you all get the answers you need and hopefully you continue to hang around and give your input or out put or just vent and vent and vent.
As you know I am not a caregiver but do have my mom (Captain bobbie's Aunt Hank) in an assisted living but I faithfully read and try to post a joke every night if I can. Hugs to all and thanks for being there for all the one's that need the care that you have given and will give. No joke tonight but I did give you the Michigan poem and if I were outside right now I think I would be stuck cause it be cold and it is getting colder as we speak. -7 by the weekend with a high of 12. Hugs to all
luvCuz
(3)
Report

A Michigan poem

It's winter in Michigan
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour,
At thirty-five below.

Oh, how I love Michigan
When the snow's up your butt.
You take a breath of winter air
And your nose gets frozen shut.

Yes, the weather here is wonderful,
So I guess I'll hang around
I could never leave Michigan
"Cause I'm frozen to the ground!
(4)
Report

Juju good to see you posting again.
(2)
Report

Hey Bobbie.....in the boating world are there charter boats to Hawaii....i am so fried and the iweb is so messed up here takes me forever to get this stuff done and frustrating no doubt so just thought i ask the captain!

Thanks and love!
Juju
(1)
Report

Juju is mom getting adequate pain medication?
(2)
Report

Hi everyone...how has it been going....bobbie how are you??
I have been busy at work pulling our life out of the crapper!!
MIss you guys!!! I haven't been online much at all since beginning November.

What have you all been up to?

Well we have made a few changes round here, I purchased a used van with a bed and wheelchair lift to get out with mom.so I can actually leave the house with her. when it is time for a diaper change I can use the van bed!! the concept of actually being able to go somewhere was just too inticing......however we have not gotten much use of it yet as
on our first outing to the dr ironically, somehow her leg got caught up in the chair and she injured her knee for almost 2 months she has been in sever pain, doc's of course have no solution but to wait it out....I know it is not broken but I don't know what it could be. all I know is everytime I move her is a challenge she just cries whenever i move it and we are having complications with pressure sores as she just constantly fidgets in pain.....and she has completely lost the ability to stand. she hasn't walked in years but she could stand and transfer...standing is no more and it has presented only more challenges on me .
However ever since i had a huge meltdown last fall triggered by the 10th anniversary of the death of our family and my "friend" nearly screwed me on that cruise deal(i was able to get the credit card company to get all my money back and negotiating with cruise line for resolution to their behavior!!!
Honestly mom is not looking well at all since this leg injury but life has never been better! I have a little thread of hope i am hanging on to that i never had before!! everything else is just coming along beautifully... I am writing a business plan outline for our "hummingbird house foundation" and in negotiations for our home on the big island. My only fear now is i will not get her there. i do not want to put her on a plane....4 months ago i would have done it just once to get her there but i know my momma and my gut says no plane at this stage...I can put her on a cruise ship but the ones that allow one way aren't till September....so i looks like we may have our hummingbird hospice house...and not be able to use it for us, but at least we created it, my mothers legacy to her battle with dementia....
so on top of the serious pressure sores on leg she just will not eat on own anymore she just plays with the food smears it everywhere, she did that mildly before but now everymeal is just a big dang mess. she can barely hold her drink cup anymore so have started regular spoon feedings. My heart is just breaking but in great relief at the same time.......maybe there is an end to this madness in site, and i can welcome it with out fear of what that means to me, after 10 ys of hard labor i will have a roof over my head,
That fear of homelessness and the isolation consumed my whole life nearly killed me and i today am able to say (god willing as long as escrow closes) that monster is no longer gonna torture me .....i am looking forward every moment i still have with momma with now finally not resenting what this illness did to the person i used to be....Well today i am 100% sure i will have a roof overhead, may be a thatched hut but it is a roof!!! hope not fear making the rest a little less unbearable..... i can enjoy mom not hate that i got stuck with it. I am so proud that i have done it ALONE for 10 ys.

our lives financially our still a mess but my spirit is on the mend. Those big girl panties feel so nice!!!

Jen what is up with your life. is FP in a home? get me up to date!!!

Kuli- i have a question for you...kuli i just noticed was a name i came across in my Hawaiian to English name translator app....is that a coincidence or ??? i wish i could remember what it was for...Christine maybe??

anyway hope to hear from you all about what you been up too

Peace,
juju
(1)
Report

Saw it on weather channel really you guys have had enough. I have an elderly pen pal in Cambridge! I hope she is O.K.

Still no call back from nursing home. what for $12,000 a month you can't call someone back in two days or less? We're on five days...
(0)
Report

I remember the storms of 93 -my late husband had many surgeries that winter -one was down in NY City and I had to stay in the hospital sleeping on coffee table for 4 nights -one day the cafeteria some sales reps were complaining of getting rained on while getting taxies -I could not contain myself and spoke of of where I live we had 3 ft. of snow on the ground and getting 2 storms a week and having to drive in to work in blizzards to be at work at 7am and would love to get a little wet getting a cab-I did stop their whining .
(2)
Report

Jen thank you for asking the easy coast is dealing with snow and ice-more tomorrow -probably will miss church gain because t may start around noon as we do not get out until 1:30 or so-I have been getting out about 1-2 times a week to get the ail and do errands-on the plus side my closets are getting organized and have most of my tax prep work done and we are all caught up I in the horrific train/car accident last Tue night and it makes me mad that people are judging the lady who caused her and five others losing their lives-she may have been distracted because of having to detour her usual trip home I think everyone should just be quiet about it-she left 3 kids and a husband -no one knows what she was going through at the time.
(1)
Report

meanwhile I don't have horses anymore. I just could not look after them, too unsteady on my feet these days. My eldest daughter does though. She is an upper level dressage rider and has a beautiful black Morgan stallion who she has trained herself. He is making quite a name for himself in the Morgan world. She loves him dearly and of course now he's got so far she would not geld him but says she would never have another stallion. Can't understand why???????????

Susan could you make Mom wear the headphones while you work. tell he the volume is broken and this is the only way she can watch.

When our kids were little and we were renting house we brought 3 sts of head phones and made the kids watch their programs with those. I was a really mean mother!!!!!!!!
(1)
Report

Did that myself two years ago... I think...years all blur together now. Couldn't walk through three feet of snow at cemetery so I rolled and put the little trees on graves and rolled back down hill to get to mom and the car...
G is sick now, no call back from nursing home as yet, he is getting worse really, and I am wondering, if somehow he will get sick and die and be in hospital at the end and the nursing home won't even be an issue...That would be good...

How are things for the East Coast people? I hope that snow is melting off and not more moving in...

Linda things sound really really hard there, I am sorry, I hope you can get all the help you need. Sometimes the body just needs to rest. Unfortunately, as caregivers we so often don't get it. I am thinking of you here...Jen
(1)
Report

Step dad wrecked his van today, but not sure it was his fault. He turned left, and a guy in a jeep tried to pass him. Nobody hurt, both vehicles had to be towed to the garage though. Sheriff didn't give anyone a ticket.
Veronica, you have horses? I have a horse, just for pleasure riding. They have to be taken care of no matter the weather, or if your sick. Kind of reminds me of taking care of a family member. Except animals are much less demanding. We have an old barn cat (about 17 years old). He doesn't want to come in the house, so I made him a bed in the hay stall, even put a litter box there for him. Giving him all the canned cat food he wants. He has always been a cranky, don't touch me cat. He is almost friendly lately, now that he is so old and can barely get around.
(2)
Report

Susan in '93 when we had a blizzard and 3 ft of snow none of my help could get to the farm and I had to crawl to the barn to feed the horses.
(3)
Report

Oh my gosh, Veronica! Glad you weren't hurt and got up before you froze! Susan, funny story haha!
(1)
Report

Veronica - I'm sorry, but your story made me chuckle and here's why:

About 40 years ago, when my mom was in her 30s, she used to take care of the rectory for the Catholic church we attended. She cleaned, cooked, etc for the resident priest. One winter, when we had a pretty exceptional amount of snow, even for Michigan, the priest traveled to Florida for a week's vacation, and Mom needed to go up to the rectory daily to check on things. She and Dad walked up the hill from our house, where the rectory was located, and found the front porch was buried under a 5' tall drift of snow. Neither of them had brought a shovel, because they planned to use the shovel at the rectory to clean off the porch,etc - but they had to get IN there first....

Now, you have to picture this: Mom is a very short woman. If she stretches, she might be 4' 9" tall, and at the time, she was hovering around 250-280 lbs - so not only was she short, she was pretty round as well. Knowing she couldn't walk through the drift without ending up like you did in your yard, Mom took the next best route over the snowdrift - she belly-flopped into the drift and ROLLED over it to the other side. LOL
(3)
Report

Here's my vent I fell and I couldn't get up. Trouble was I was in knee deep snow and I can only get up if I can get on my hands and knees.I had gone out to empty the ash bucket and throught I could make it to the edge of the wood. Well I did and got half way back and down I sat. Temp was in the teens and I rolled around till I could get my legs out from underneath me. Looked like a snow man by the time I got back in the house and just threw my clothes in the bath tub. Soft landing so no harm done. Won't do that again!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(3)
Report

hi you all .
jen , hope all things goes better for u and ur mom . like my pa would say IT IS WHAT IT IS TO BE . hope G would just pass in his sleep soon before he hits nursing home . prices at nursing home is downright awful ! .. sending you cyber hugs xoxox
am doing ok here , hubby s going tmr for his first treatment . he had it done 3 mos ago and cancer came back . so 6 more treatments again . he s been sleeping alot , no enegry , depressions sinking in . am hoping the long term disabilty kicked in . tryin so hard to get the paperwork all sorted out . today is the final due , hoping it is turned in today . all this has made my husband worried sick .

i hurt everywhere every day , fibromaligic sucks ! force myself to get up and do what needs to be done around here . disk in my back lumbar is crumbling ... am going to see back spine dr this comin monday . lifting a small fire wood just takes a toll on me . im only 52 , i feel like life isnt right ... IT IS WHAT IT IS TO BE , what the buck helll , !
cant wait for spring . am tired of this cold weather . its hard on the bones .
CUZ , always love ur jokes . had me grinnin ... hope ure doing ok ..
xoxox
(3)
Report

Nursing home has not returned moms call yet...I mean come on!
(2)
Report

195austin we saw that on the news. Something about an suv that was stuck on the tracks? It didn't look good from the pictures that were on the news.
(0)
Report

I am not competing I follow the Queen who does not like wearing hers because it gives her a headache. A nice sheepskin bonnet would be a better choice today
(0)
Report

Cuz you get to keep your crown -we will get another for Veronica-but a little smaller-she has to earn the bigger one-you are the best. We just had a railroad train tragedy north of New York City-6 people killed during rush hour last evening
(1)
Report

Veronica I relinquish my crown. Can't top that one tonight.
Jen we are still thinking of you and your still in our prayers. Hopefully your wishes will be granted and you will be able to move on. Hugs to you
luvCuz
(1)
Report

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter