Count Your Blessings and Lucky Stars!

Neon you keep me laughing-I got good news there are keeping him for 2-3 more weeks I have to meet again next week with the group and then he will probably stay another two weeks YES -I am so bad but to br truthful I do not want him home now I can go to my voleenteer job and church on Wed evenings for another few weeks oh freedom-you stay strong girlfriend-have to go out and pick the rhubarb and chives -got my flowers planted my son gave me for mothers day and some sunflower seeds planted and did the food shopping for the next 10 days done and kept within my budget.

I forgot to add the 12 minute drive is usually in silence which then I turn my oldies up and sing to the top of my horrible lungs LOL or I have to hear about what he did and how great he is gets on my last nerve sometimes we never talk about us, there are no goals, well we couldn't have any right now anyway for the house that is but there was one I was going to get a pool for free he told me about and now he has changed his mine I don't need it???? but he could take two or three hours and do something but he won't and thats fine soon I will be meeting all kinds of people and I won't be there at all so thats the way the cookie crumbles and I ain't cleaning up the crumbs.!!!

Thanks Austin, glad you got all that stuff out of the way there is only so much even you can do He sounds like he and my mother would get along really really good they could start a new soap opera as the stomach turns or who can pass out the fastest win XXX $ good game show or a reality tv show who will survive? I am being sarcastic and sick but hey that's who I am.

Dear NEON I am proud of you taking an action for yourself always helps me the husband is acting like a victum but I fought like a pit bull for him yesterday and I am not staying for people to get in touch with me I called medicare the ombudsmen the health department the dietican and the nurses and told everyone I expect him to get better care and to be given fluids and if he does not feel well in PT not to wait until he passes out to get a nurse. You keep being strong no one is listening and good for you to have your Mon get her own meals- I eat my meals alone when I am pissed at him why would I want to be around someone who is not nice to me,you take care my dear and will talk later ok little sister.

thank you NAUS, it's always easier to see things from the outside looking in. When a person experiences something they don't step back to look at the situation they just react. and thats what I have been doing. I am working on it. But the trouble is I do have lots of hobbies and activities and it doesn't seem to matter even when we go to play cards he doesn't play he sits in another room and watches tv or goes with our son to shoot pool so there still is no togetherness unless you want to count the 12 minutes it takes to get there.

Dear Sweet Neon, you are not a terrible mother. You remind me so much of my own dear mother, God rest her soul. She was so giving, and had so much love to give, and always had a smile for me each and every morning, even though I was not a morning person, and a grump. She always put others before herself. I am not saying that is the way to do things, because she died at age 51. But I too understand about the attention deficit in a relationship. My husband used to travel a lot years ago, and when he came home, the tv was on before you knew it, and that was all she wrote. Never mind that I was stuck at home all week long with three kids to take care of and a house. I wanted to do something and he wanted to just rest. They get comfortable, so to speak. It's okay, we just have to be patient. Just take an interest in some hobbies, or other activities that YOU enjoy, and soon he will take notice, and come crawling, and craving for YOUR attention. That's right, play hard to get, it always works. We love you dear Neon! Funny how each of us wants to help fix other's problems when we can't even fix our own. Maybe it's because other people's problems seem easier than our own. Who knows, I'm ranting, sorry. Big giant hugs to you all! Have a good day my dear friends.

thank you NAUS, Mitzi, and Austin, I started that Sunday, My mother is perfectly capable of fixing meals, she does it all day long, the proof is in the sink or dishwasher or sitting on the stove when I get home from work, so sunday and last night I made myself something to eat and not her, (this hurt my heart not to do it but for once she needs to know how she makes me feel) well after she realized I didn't fix her anything she went to the kitchen and huffed and puffed talked under her breathe, whewed about 50 times but made herself something to eat, there is plenty of food in my house, it behooves me that she doesn't have the sense or the desire to make a meal for a daughter, the only child who will take her in. As for my husband, I put the mirror on my car myself, I bought a tire thing that puts air in your tire by plugging into a cigarette lighter in your car until I can get a new tire, which I asked him to order about three weeks ago! Today I will pick up the touch up paint I ordered yesterday to fix the scratches on my car and I have two little dents I will put a plunger on that and see if I can pull them out first. As of last sat. I will not ask him to do another thing for me, I will also ignore him (play hard to get as they say) not that I really want him at this time, I've had it up to 5 ft 2 1/2 inches and I'm only 5'2". It hurts my heart to treat them like that and apparently my son is treating his other half the same way according to her blog on myspace so I just told her last night if that is really how you feel now is the time to get out and my son cannot come back home because I have no room. So he will learn early maybe what his father should have learned 32 years ago. I am giving him 6 years just to get adjusted. Apparently he is very comfortable in our relationship and doesn't think he needs to do anything but have a job which is very notable but I have one to and always have had one. I am not the only person living in that house. and I call it a house because it isn't a home I've always wanted a home because I never had one as a kid we moved over 52 times just because the rent was due. I could have had one awesome life If I would have moved to different states or countries but sometimes it was only down the street how ridiculous is that. So I am working on it This week end will be the hardest the first one I actually do my own thing and not say a word about what I am doing because Its all about my husband he knows everything and my mother she knows everything to I the capable one seem to know nothing. Funny how that works out isn't it? You all have a great day. and thanks for all the encouragement I will not get too comfy sometimes things will go smoothly for about 2 or 4 weeks than bingo back to square one so this time I will keep my guard up and make sure they know exactly how I feel about how they respond or don't respond to me. I don't think after 38 years of marriage it is too much to ask your husband to spend a day with you in six months I have been talking about a date night for about 20 years now and that hasn't happened so those of you who do those please enjoy I am sure it keeps you in touch, I realize my husband and I have nothing in common except a child and right now I don't even like my child. Terrible mother aren't I?

Neon have a good night I hope you realize how valueable you are to me and the rest of our gang-I have spent the day on the phone being a squeky wheel or a pain in the butt to the nursing home and social worker and boy does it feel good-talk to you tomarrow.

Neon, I couldn't help but notice one of your statements, "I guess I need to understand that I will take whatever love I get from wherever I get it and be satisfied,"

Don't you realize hon you are worth more than wherever you can get it? You don't deserve to be treated as you have. Start choosing now to make changes. Let me give you some pro-active options to help yourself start a bit. They don't go without struggles, but it will help you gain some freedom emotionally as well.

You can be who you are!!! You can! Others will NOT like it because they have been used to you one way for so long. That's okay!! Take baby steps. Your children learned to crawl before they could walk and they learned to walk before they can run.

Taking care of yourself emotionally and physically is no different. Find one thing in your day that you are tired of. Make a determination of what you will or will not do. Then consciously say it out loud of what you won't do. Make that your one goal for the week (if its reoccurring). Watch what happens.

We don't have to go before God cowering and feeling unworthy. There is no way. Do you like it when your children come before you cowering or feeling unworthy? You love them regardless. It's no different for any of us here as caregivers.

Neon, its not about pride, its not about guilt, its not about being ashamed to take care of yourself. It's that we've believed a lie for so long we do not know any other reality. I know for my own life for the first time I can honestly say my life to this point has been a blessing. If not for all the verbal abuse, narcissistic behavior from mom, and everything else, I never would have realized what was lost. I wouldn't be where I am now. Now it is a time for healing. Now it is a time for restoring, and enjoying my life. The same can be said for you hon..... (((((Neon)))))

Dear Neon, I can't tell you how many times I have felt exactly the way you describe.  All used up, numb, uncaring, don't give a sh_t anymore, on and on I could go, but I wouldn't be helping anyone here, just dragging them down into the dark depths with me, which is not what I want to do.  If not for my beautiful children and grandchildren, and now the cute little doggie who sits patiently at my feet or side while I do things and follows me to every room, I too have contemplated the best way to take my own life without making a mess, or ruining the lives of the people I love the most. That would be the cowards way out. But I seriously need a vacation. We here love you Neon, and everyone else too, because we know more than most how you are feeling, and feel the same way. But today, I count my blessings again that we are still here, and alive, and able to see the beauty that God shows us each and every day, even though sometimes we may be too busy to see or notice. Take time, to see these things. I count my blessings that I am able to get up out of bed each and every day to see all that God can show us. I count my blessings that I do not have alzheimer's/dementia, yet anyway.

That really makes you think, doesn't it? That is why your sense of humor matters so much to us all you help in ways you can't even imagine and in your hard times you use that to cover up how you feel and the same time your pain is our relief. Really strange , peace to you, Michele

I just found this article....

Navajo and other traditional cultures understand that there's nothing more soulful than supporting people at the margins of life, those who can't walk fast or talk sense or remember how to use a toilet. They also know that this takes a village.

It really does.

Most eldercare providers in our village-less society end up jury-rigging systems of helpers. The common refrain I heard from people in the trenches? Take notes. Write down every bit of advice you get, from every person who interacts with your family member: doctors, pharmacists, neighbors, hairstylists. Write down these people's contact information. For good or evil, they're your village. Oprah: Do you have a hard time asking for help?

Jennifer has 45 people on her call list should her elderly parents encounter a crisis. Polly rallied support from her parents' church congregation. Not everyone in the village will help care for an elderly person, but a long list gives you multiple possibilities for support.

"No one can tell you what to expect," Anne said to me. "You have to live like a firefighter, ready to call other firefighters to solve whatever problem arises."

Psychological coping strategies

Once you've adopted this firefighting mentality about your parent's needs, you'll need a whole new set of strategies like the ones below to deal with the emotional wreckage that piles up along the way.

Surrender to the emotional grinder.

"The thing that galls me most about caring for my mother," one woman told me, "is that she's the only one who gets a morphine drip."

The emotional pain suffered by caregivers is intense -- and unlike the elderly, caregivers are expected to live through it. With every new issue your elderly relative develops, you'll head into the emotional grinder called the grief process: bargaining, anger, sadness, acceptance, repeat.

Grieving, like physical caretaking, differs from case to case. If you had a troubled relationship with an aging parent, expect to spend lots of time in the anger stage. Use this time to clean your emotional closet. Explore the anger with a therapist. Journal it. Process it with friends. Clean the wounds. Oprah: 4 healthy ways to grieve

On the other hand, if your declining parent was your main source of emotional support, you'll find yourself spending lots of time in sadness. You'll feel as though it's killing you. It won't.

As Naomi Shihab Nye wrote, "Before you know kindness / as the deepest thing inside, / you must know sorrow / as the other deepest thing.... / Then it is only kindness / that makes sense anymore...."

As the grieving process scrapes along, you'll learn to offer kindness to everyone: your aging relative, the people of your village, yourself. When you snap under stress and begin to rail at Nana, God, yourself, and the cat, you'll learn to be kind to yourself anyway. At that point, you'll find relief and an unexpected gift: laughter.

Nourish a sick sense of humor.

A morbid sense of humor isn't listed in any official guides to eldercare, but to the caregivers I interviewed, it is like oxygen.

Take, for example, Meg Federico's memoir "Welcome to the Departure Lounge." Federico's wry portrayal of her mother's senescence is both sad and hilarious. Without belittling her mother or her stepfather, Walter, both of whom suffered dementia, Federico recounts conversations like this one:

"I can't seem to find my keys," Walter told Mom. "Say, do you have them?"

"Oh, don't worry about keys, dearest. We don't need them. We can jump out the window and fly home."

"What?" said Walter. "You can fly? I never knew."

"So can you, but you have to take your shoes off."

To Walter's credit, he was not convinced.

Just acknowledging that this is funny makes it tolerable. Cracking up can keep caregivers from, well, cracking up.

"Bill and I are training his dad to 'go toward the light,'" said my friend Anne, whose father-in-law no longer recognizes his family. "Any light we see -- lamps, flashlights, the TV -- we steer him over there. We figure he can use the practice."

Of course, Anne isn't serious. Not being serious is how she and Bill are surviving. If you can't train your elder to go toward the light, you can make light of the situation. And sometimes, that light becomes splendiferous.

Ponder the nature of existence.

There's nothing like caring for the elderly to help you face your own mortality. Many caregivers told me that their experience was dissolving, through simple drudgery, their fear of death.

Pulitzer Prize--winning psychologist Ernest Becker wrote that the denial of death underlies all evils, and that we must drop this denial to live fully. The caregivers I interviewed would agree.

"Fear of death was my biggest obstacle in life," said Polly. "To help my dad, I have to get past it. He's showing me how to die, which is really helping me live."

Other caregivers went further. They said that as they watched the door close on their loved one's physical identity, a door to the metaphysical slowly opened.

"I don't believe in an afterlife, but as my mother died, I truly understood that being dead is no more frightening than being asleep, which I love."

"As my husband's body was failing, he became almost translucent. I went right through my own pain and felt the most intense peace. I can still find that."

"Just before my grandmother died in surgery, I heard her voice saying, 'I'm leaving now, but you'll be fine.' I've been less anxious about everything ever since."

This is why traditional cultures value even the most fragile, disoriented elder, why the Navajo carry "Grandmother's bones" with such reverent attention. Even as you grapple with the logistical and psychological stress of eldercare, there will be moments when you find yourself on the "blessing path."

Rather than a long day's journey into night, you'll feel yourself making a long night's journey into day: through fear and confusion to courage and wisdom. Receive this gift, the final one your parents can offer before they take off their shoes, jump out the window, and fly home

Neon- I am so lucky to have a sister she is7 yrs younger WW2 got in the way and we were not close until we were adults and once a week she calls or I call her and she listens to my tale of woe. It is better to be alone then with someone who does not treat you well I was going to get a legal separartion last year but my pastor talked me out of it I should have and would not be losing everything to medicade now you need to do what is in your heart I know others here would not agree but Dr. Phil has said you can not leave a marriage unless you have turned over every rock or something like that I have I got him diag. for bi-polar went to couples counseling took him to a therapist and we both met with her when she wanted to and went to a therapist myself and met with our Pastor and talked to the husband till I was blue in the face and if one more person tells me it is his disease which he denies I may punch them out and have asked God for guidence-so I think I have the right to do what I need to do oh and I fight his battles like calling the ombudsmen for the problems at the nursing home and when they told me to call the Board of health in my state I did and I called medicare about having to pay the bed hold when it was their fault he went to the hospital 3 times so I still fight his battles and he treats me like s---. So my friend you do what you need to do to save yourself-but please keep in touch little sister.

Thanks Mitzi, I can relate to the feeling of abandonment your whole life, you can have birth parents who raise you that doesn't mean they are there for you some like mine just have kids to use for their own selfish reasons, mine is still doing that its all about her comfort i just rushed home to let my dogs out even that is too much for her to do it would interrupt her soap operas I just put a 25 ft cord on her phone so she can lay in bed like the queen of something and talk on the phone and she said oh now I can be comfortable, give me a break lady, I thank you for your words of encouragement and your sharing I do understand what you are going thru I wonder how many of us are out here? Yes I am not a wimp but a know a lot of them. I guess I need to understand that I will take whatever love I get from wherever I get it and be satisfied, I know my God loves me, I know he has tempered me, I know this cannot last for much longer it can't possibly I have to have some refuge I don't turn everything over to God yet, seems hard to do when you have always been the one taking care of everyone. I am working on that I guess when HE gets done with me I will be the strongest of strong sometimes I get so tired of being the strong one but I think that is a different kind of strong as I am writing this.

Some days I feel just like Job more days than not. Not that I am as righteous as Job but I sure can identify with him.

Again thank all of you for your love and well wishes, you really don't know what it means to me I hope for all of you things take a turn for the best so that you can be who you are, thats the hardest thing not being able to be who I am and who God wants me to be, the evil one is lurking ready to devour me like a lion and I refuse to allow that. I need to find myself and I know God can help me as well as all of you.

((((((Neon)))))) When I read this I wanted to sit right next to you and cry with you. God is a God of restoration despite what anyone else really wants to believe.

I have no children so I cannot relate in that loss, but let me tell you briefly about me and I know in the depths of my being, as long as we keep pursuing and seeking, He will restore double for our trouble. Question is the hanging on part.

I was adopted (basic feelings of rejection my whole life). I was adopted by a narcissistic woman who led me to feel I couldn't be myself. I married a man completely opposite my faith. I married a verbal abuser (oh the stories we could share), I met my birth mother and learned some hard lessons there. I went into severe debt because of my unhappiness. I gained over 100 lbs due to being so unhappy. I had a nervous breakdown 10 years ago. That is when God started teaching me boundaries. Years ago I tried or catered the thoughts of suicide. I ran away from home (while married) into another bad scenario.

Since my dad's stroke 5 years ago, I compound the problem with instantly becoming a caregiver, provider, legal counsel, financial wiz (remember used to be in debt). In the last two months I lost my aunt and my MIL (both I was close too). I am dealing now with stepping up the boundaries a bit for my own sanity. Finally went to a counselor (yes, Christian counselor) to find my inner peace at any cost.

I am emotionally spent. Like you I am tired. When I look back at each of the instances I told you about, I can see God's hand in everything. I don't know how I survived without Him. Emotionally.... there are things even now that are challenging. Teaching my husband boundaries for one. God has equipped me with a great counselor that gives me the tools to be Godly about it while maintaining my own sanity.

I try to grieve the loss of my MIL and my aunt and I have nowhere to even cry. My husband can't stand seeing me upset and that starts a whole other issue. My schedule is packed to the guild because of just life. My time with God is becoming extremely challenging, but the determination to NEVER GIVE UP.... that's the thing mom taught me best.... stubbornness.

I have a job where people are probably the most miserable I have ever seen (I have an employment record two miles long). I don't talk to a soul because every word I speak is used against me.

Do NOT be afraid to take care of you. People are going to get pissy about your decision to take care of you, but so what!! They've had their way. You have a chance to allow God to give you double for your trouble, but you also have to do your part to take care of you. God does not want to see His children suffer. But when we allow people to walk all over us, He cannot shine.

Being a Godly-gal isn't for wimps, and you have sure proven you are not one. Neon... we all just love you to the hilt!! Love and care comes in the strangest of places. Take it from one who has lost a lot.

Thank you austin I know you have a lot on your plate, the only thing I can do right now is keep on keeping on until I change some things than I can go. Its just a matter of time now. I now have a plan. and my oh my won't he be surprised. He hasn't a clue and its not because he hasn't been told this has been going on for the last 26 years that was the first time it hit the fan but this time I am finished talking it does no good unless the other person wants to participate so I will just make my plans, clean up stuff and clean out things that no longer matter put things in envelopes that should matter to leave behind and go on my merry little way. It is better to be alone when your alone than to be alone with people in the house. I appreciate your love and thank you for considering me like a sister. I have a sister but she doesn't really want to hear it either, she has her own life to live I have a brother he really doesn't want to know he hasn't returned a call since May 21st 2007 or a card or a email So now it is time to consider me yes I am going to finally learn how to be selfish, I am going to stop finding work to do for free as that only makes me feel more used. I work enough, people are going to handle things themselves, my boss and people at church tell me I am to valuable but that is not the same as the ones who are suppose to value you. I hope this makes sense or maybe I should just admit myself to the closest looney bin I really don't know anymore. But this I do know I am sick of it. and so so so tired.

NEON I wrote you a note but it got lost somehow-you are always there for us I so wish I could give you the comfort you need and I hope God will answer your prayers and make things easier for you it is not fair what you are going through and that no one at your home considers you they are all wrong and selfish to boot-you know I love you like a sister so think of me like I am a family member and you have someone on your side at all times-talk to me at any time I will leave the computer on and check to see if you post girlfriend

THANKS Micheleangel, but I don't think there is anything anyone can do I've allowed it too long. I was just getting my feelings out you guys are the only ones who seem to listen or are interested. I will just stuff it down like I always have and it will just sit there until it is all gone. My whole life has been a turmoil with parents than husband, than losing a kid, and more of parents and husband so I don't expect it to change anytime soon. I am dug in too deep I always think about the history but I think sometimes we just have to forget the history and get to a place where we can make some changes, my life is over now and i will never get the real thing I want on this earth is for someone to find me in the flesh acceptable and love me I don't mean all gushy love I mean show me in small ways that I do matter not just sit like a lump and wait for the next meal or take for granted everything will be taken care of. I will get there it is just going to take me some time but I will get there. Thanks for your caring Its the everyday life that is so lonely and frustrating because I am not able to do for myself what I seem to be able to do for everyone else, that is the way I was raised, no excuses I'm old enough to know better, but me being me hate confrontation and hurting other peoples feelings although they don't have a bit of problem hurting mine so I just need to figure out a way not to have any feelings with these people. Get my act together and go away. Make myself happy and let them figure out what happened. I am not giving any clues at this stage of the game. Certainly they should be as tuned in to themselves and I am to me. Have a great day! :-)

Hey Neon, I feel really bad for you I wish I could help you. It's sad what your going through now I'm really sorry. If I could be there I would everyone needs help now and then anyone out there what can we do for neon she needs our help!!!

Hey Naus, I feel the same way can't ya tell??? I even entertained the thought of suicide this week end. The only thing that stopped me was God, I hate my life, I hate my home, I hate my family, what there is of it. I have worked all my life to be a good mother, daughter, wife, to no avail, I don't matter one iota to those people I am just a person to take care of them so they don't have to think or do anything for themselves, If I say something it gets thrown back in my lap. I am the bad guy all the time, nothing I try works with my husband and I gave up on a relationship with my mother a long time ago. Yesterday Imade myself something to eat not the usual for everyone I hope she felt as hurt as she makes me feel it only took 60 years to try it her way. How does one get to go thru life never having to do anything, never having to apologize, never having to be accountable for any thing but think they are a saint well I guess if you never do anything you can't make mistakes, I do so much and I am so sick of my husband telling me this is wrong and that is wrong I don't even have enough sense to order a mirror for my car as far as he is concerned but guess what it was the right mirror it all boiled down to he doesn't want to put it on so instead of all the little games just say so and also say you want out of this marriage because I really do and I will say it as soon as a few little bills are paid off and my mother dies cuz I sure don't want to take her with me and she's not ready for the nursing home. I wish she was I wish he would find some sweet young thing to drool all over him my drooling days are over when I can't even count on him to spend five minutes with me. You would think that him seeing how stressed I have been and what it is doing to me he could at least be a small comfort and hold me I have to ask for every single hug I think I need and some time to spend with him that never ever happens so now I stop asking, will not complicate by turning to anyone else too old and who the heck wants old used up people I sure don't haven't heard from my son in over two weeks so guess what mommie dearest isn't here anymore. I really need out! I kid and make jokes its all just a big wall to hide behind don't want to show any feelings of anykind anymore especially to family they take advantage of it I suppose when it all comes down to it It is my fault for allowing them to do it but I have no other tools to handle it I am supposed to be Christ like and finding that harder and harder to do every day. I am a small package ready to explode.

Hey Neon pretty funny. You do make me laugh I feel like I have no sanity either. Hey Austin where are you "moving" your lawn to? You made me laugh and I bet you didn't even know it.

Sometimes though, I feel I am running out of blessings to count.

Neon you are so funny you made my day-my blessing is that I almost have the whole lawn moved it takes me about 4 hrs because I have to stop and rest-I am an old lady you know-I am still laughing about your windows if I start laughing outside maybe they will lock me up.

Im counting my blessings that we have someone like Neon here, and others as well that make us laugh instead of cry. Love you Neon!

I have two blessings today to count or perhaps its just one

Hubby was supposed to spend the day with me saturday we planned it for a week he spent zilch time with me sat. no excuses just sat in front of tv all day, I am thankful I did not blow up the TV and wring his neck.

We have been in a drought for the last three we have had rain for days and days and days it is great for my gardens and everyones wells, the only conversation I can have with my mother is (Miss doom and gloom) "Oh this rain if it don't stop it is so depressing) well you never leave the house anyway its not like your going to sit in the sunshine!! I am thankful I didn't strangle her. There have to be some changes because I am thankful for the teenie tiny bit of sanity I have left. sooooooo when all else fails turn to humor.

REPLACEMENT WINDOWS


Last year I replaced all the windows in my house
with that expensive double-pane energy
efficient kind, and
today, I got a call from the contractor
who installed
them.

He was complaining that the
work had been completed a whole year ago
and I still hadn't
paid for them.

Hellloooo,...........just because I'm
blonde doesn't mean that
I am automatically stupid.

So, I told
him just what his fast talking sales guy
had told me last
year, that in ONE YEAR these windows
would pay for
themselves!

Helllooooo? It's been a
year! I told him.

There was only
silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung
up.

He never called back. I bet he
felt like an idiot.

Amen that this country has women like Anne, Neon, LDaughter, Naus, Look there is more of you than I can list, suffice it to say Christan men and women need to pray for one another, and hang toegther! Thank God for Dave Ramsey! Jerome.

Hi Anne, I've been looking after another person with dementia (not alzheimers) as well as my mom, so I have been busy and not able to post. "When the fight is weak, they still want to live, to communicate with their face, their eyes, to eat, to enjoy, " What I meant by this sentence is - even though the person is overwhelmed by their dementia, they still struggle to show you who they are/where they are as they are able. My mother can still smile in expectation as I pull her up to stand- as I begin to dance with her - sometimes she will sing a tune with garbled words, but the tune is sweet, and I try to dance to the cadence of her song. Maybe I am lucky to have such a sweet mother(when she is properly medicated) She still has a great smile!
I just want to say I am thankful for my adversity, for it helps me put in perspective
how good my good times really are. Does that help? Jerome.

Todays blessing is even though it is raining again the tress are all in blossoms and the bushes also and flowers are in bloom and it is very pretty outside and the inprovements to this site are great it will br helpful to ask questions aor to start a new topic and a lot easier-thank you Carol-you are a blessing also and really understand our problems because you have lived them and are living them-thank you.

no trouble just a saying I have when things get a little out there just joking

Selling tickets...OK maybe I got myself in trouble! Will talk later. Mom's appointment with Geritrician soon, and Dad's needs...

OK maybe I got myself in trouble! Will talk later. Mom's appointment with Geritrician soon, and Dad's needs...