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Because so many who participate or lurk on this forum and are suffering with having to deal with a declining narcissistic loved one, this video is for you.
https://youtu.be/N9mPgG4KCSk?si=hyRHwyGuzztGuuMv

Kristinef- When to Sever Ties With Toxic Family Members by Pastor Mark Driscoll is a sermon on Youtube that helped me better see how boundaries work in light of Scripture. He does not just talk about walking away, but other responses as well. The sermon is taken from the Genesis account of Laban's daughters fleeing his toxic, abusive behavior.
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Thank you Geaton777. This is a great perspective that the Bible doesn't tell us we have to be door mats. AND - that it is honoring them by making sure they are safe, taken care of, etc. I needed your advice. :)
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Kristinef, setting them up in memory care and monitoring their wellbeing from a healthy distance IS honoring them. They are safe, nourished and socialized. The Bible in no way encourages people to be doormats.

You aren't responsible for your Mother's happiness. She picked that loser and now she has to live with that choice and you DON'T have to participate in her poor decision. We don't get to choose our family members but we do get to choose how much we engage with them. This is called a boundary.
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Thank you for sharing. Where I struggle is my mother who is 85 is married to one. He is not my father. I've dealt with him for 35yrs and since his daughter and I have moved then into memory care I dread going to visit. Over the years my mother has always chosen him first. And continues to do so. I am trying to set boundaries but because she is my mother and I love her; I do my best. Some days I engage and other days I just tell her I've got things to do and I leave. She cries, I feel guilty, he controls her whole life. The staff there are well aware of how he behaves and try to intervene on her behalf when they see his verbal and emotional abuse. I've tried over the years to give her options to leave him but to no avail. The staff there tell me that I'm so nice to him. My son and daughter-in-law and my close friends are helping me to see that because I love my mother it doesn't mean I have to stay and be subject to his tantrums, denial, verbal and emotional abuse. My brothers live out of state. He has one son who lives out of the country, another one who mainly doesn't care, and his daughter who lives 2hrs away. She does her best and I often feel sorry for her. I pray for strength, patience, and guidance every single time I get to that parking lot before I go in. IF anyone has any advice, I'm open to listening. How does one follow "honor your mother and father" but yet set those boundaries and not feel you are
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Thanks for sharing! Very helpful!
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Thank you for posting this!
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I love HN Julie. Thank you for this link, Geaton.
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