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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Do you want to see and be with the others of family and friends? Do you want to offer yourself as support to someone who may be there that you love who may be truly grieving the deceased? Those are reasons to go.
Do you want the sense of ending of this portion of *your* life and experience to be marked and noted, if only to you? If you cry, only you will know the reasons, whether it is mourning the loss of a loved one, or mourning the love and happiness that never was.
If you can’t find a good reason to go for those yet alive, including yourself, take some time that day to go sit quietly by a lake, or in a garden, to reflect, to pray, to mourn, or to remember fondly those things you can, or banish as gone and done those things which are painful.
There are many reasons people couldn’t attend parents funerals. Distance, financial or emotional reasons. I couldn’t go to my grandma’s funeral because of all 3 reasons. If I lived in the same country as my Grandma’s, I would have seen her before she passed away. We spoke on the phone before she passed away, she knew I loved her deeply. I was young and I believed part of me was so afraid of watching her die. Till these day, 14 years after, I still think of her. If you loved your parent and he/she knew you did, that’s all that matters.
I am so sorry. Wishing you peace. My husband lost touch with his dad. Sad situation. I feel regardless of a relationship, a child should be informed of a death. That is just common courtesy. I also feel that others should put differences aside and offer condolences for your loss. It’s very sad that people aren’t always thoughtful with each other.
I am the OP of this post from long ago. I am surprised that is resurfaces from time to time. I find this site interesting as far as some posts being shut down and others seem to live on.
Anyway, in my case, things in my family were resolved and sorted out with mutual respect for each other. My parents are both deceased now and I did attend the funerals.
My mom passed the other day on what would’ve been her 74th Anniversary. My brother has blocked myself & my sons from seeing her for the past 4 years.
Upon hearing that I was going to be allowed to see her in the nursing home he flipped out & told them there was a no contact order against me for elder abuse which isn’t true.
I found out about her death by calling the nursing home and reading the obituary on the funeral home’s website. After contacting the funeral home my immediate family was allowed 1 hr to say good bye.
The procession from the funeral home to the church will only be for who my brother chooses to be there and the burial is private......I’m not allowed.
And he had the gall to call my house yesterday to offer his condolences! Some people are just so controlling & greedy.
Need HelpWithMom, Thank you for your compassion and the hugs. I think I’ll only heal when he is held accountable for all his actions. My mom is the one who suffered in these last 4 years without myself & her grandsons to be there with her. Instead he had a stranger in her home so he wouldn’t have to spend time with her.
I pray to get rid of the anger & bitterness I feel even though I know I will never forgive him for what he has done. It’s too late now! 🙏🏻❤️
Jada, Shame on your brother and how cruel. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this difficult time. Hope you find some peace as you move on.
You’re correct in saying that he hurt your mom by denying you and your beloved sons the right to see her. How awful!
I understand that you want justice. I feel that your mom is finally at peace and she would want the same for you. If you choose forgiveness, do it for YOU!
Don’t allow your brother to steal your peace and joy. He isn’t worth that. You don’t have to have a relationship with him though. For what it’s worth, he lost! He tossed out a loving sister and nephews. What a rotten shame for everyone involved! Very sad.
These occurrences happen and solved it is too late for a reconciliation. You won’t see me preaching ‘Pollyanna’ messages. I am a realist. I believe in hope until the situation proves itself entirely hopeless!
My dad was diagnosed with level 4 Glioblastoma this January. He’s in his final stages and I guess ive come to accept the fact that he is no longer going to be with us very soon. Having to take care of future funeral arrangements has been very difficult and I feel as though I can’t or won’t be able to attend his funeral. I don’t know what to do , I want to be there to say my last goodbyes and be there for my family but at the same time my anxiety is getting the best of me and I feel like I can’t be there like it’s going to affect me more mentally if I attend. My siblings are saying that it looks bad if I don’t attend so it makes me feel bad but at the same time I know I’m going to have trouble letting go or deal with depression and anxiety afterwards like mentally it’s going to affect me. Is it wrong if I don’t attend?
Jaylove, it is not wrong not to attend. There's no right or wrong about it. Do what you feel able to when the time comes.
Nobody has any business either to tell you what to do or to demand that you decide in advance and commit to what you will do. With you or without you the funeral will take place and your father - may he be comforted in his last days - will receive his proper dues, thanks to your preparations.
You will have done everything required of you. Anything else you feel able to manage should be done for your own peace of mind and not for the sake of other people's opinions.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Do you want to see and be with the others of family and friends? Do you want to offer yourself as support to someone who may be there that you love who may be truly grieving the deceased? Those are reasons to go.
Do you want the sense of ending of this portion of *your* life and experience to be marked and noted, if only to you? If you cry, only you will know the reasons, whether it is mourning the loss of a loved one, or mourning the love and happiness that never was.
If you can’t find a good reason to go for those yet alive, including yourself, take some time that day to go sit quietly by a lake, or in a garden, to reflect, to pray, to mourn, or to remember fondly those things you can, or banish as gone and done those things which are painful.
I am so sorry. Wishing you peace. My husband lost touch with his dad. Sad situation. I feel regardless of a relationship, a child should be informed of a death. That is just common courtesy. I also feel that others should put differences aside and offer condolences for your loss. It’s very sad that people aren’t always thoughtful with each other.
I am the OP of this post from long ago. I am surprised that is resurfaces from time to time. I find this site interesting as far as some posts being shut down and others seem to live on.
Anyway, in my case, things in my family were resolved and sorted out with mutual respect for each other. My parents are both deceased now and I did attend the funerals.
Upon hearing that I was going to be allowed to see her in the nursing home he flipped out & told them there was a no contact order against me for elder abuse which isn’t true.
I found out about her death by calling the nursing home and reading the obituary on the funeral home’s website. After contacting the funeral home my immediate family was allowed 1 hr to say good bye.
The procession from the funeral home to the church will only be for who my brother chooses to be there and the burial is private......I’m not allowed.
And he had the gall to call my house yesterday to offer his condolences! Some people are just so controlling & greedy.
I am so very sorry for the loss of your mom.
You have been through the mill with your brother! In this case, offering condolences is a kick in the gut. It just seems superficial and cruel.
My heart breaks for you. Sending a bazillion hugs and sincerely hoping that you somehow in time find peace in your heart and soul.
The funeral meant nothing to me. All that mattered was that my father was gone.
I had no regrets that I was home with the baby.
Thank you for your compassion and the hugs. I think I’ll only heal when he is held accountable for all his actions. My mom is the one who suffered in these last 4 years without myself & her grandsons to be there with her. Instead he had a stranger in her home so he wouldn’t have to spend time with her.
I pray to get rid of the anger & bitterness I feel even though I know I will never forgive him for what he has done. It’s too late now! 🙏🏻❤️
Shame on your brother and how cruel. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this difficult time. Hope you find some peace as you move on.
You’re correct in saying that he hurt your mom by denying you and your beloved sons the right to see her. How awful!
I understand that you want justice. I feel that your mom is finally at peace and she would want the same for you. If you choose forgiveness, do it for YOU!
Don’t allow your brother to steal your peace and joy. He isn’t worth that. You don’t have to have a relationship with him though. For what it’s worth, he lost! He tossed out a loving sister and nephews. What a rotten shame for everyone involved! Very sad.
These occurrences happen and solved it is too late for a reconciliation. You won’t see me preaching ‘Pollyanna’ messages. I am a realist. I believe in hope until the situation proves itself entirely hopeless!
Nobody has any business either to tell you what to do or to demand that you decide in advance and commit to what you will do. With you or without you the funeral will take place and your father - may he be comforted in his last days - will receive his proper dues, thanks to your preparations.
You will have done everything required of you. Anything else you feel able to manage should be done for your own peace of mind and not for the sake of other people's opinions.
Do what is best for you.