Last night, shortly before her bedtime, Mom had me turn off the music and come sit by her, and she proceeded to tell me that the night before, sometime between 3:30 and 4:30 AM, she was certain that I had "a man in the house" because she HEARD me close the front door when he left, and also the dog barked when he left.
Uhh ... I'm happily married, and although my husband lives at our place 85 miles away and we don't get to see each other as often as we'd like, there's no way I would let anyone take his place. Plus, I'm almost 67 years old, if that counts, LOL! The fact is, there WAS and IS no such man coming to the house as Mom is claiming. I told her that whatever she heard, she was wrong about the interpretation, and then she told me not to argue with her.
This morning, I contacted both my sisters about this, and they told me that about a month ago when they last were here to look after Mom so I could get a weekend to go spend with my husband, Mom told them the same thing about me. They apparently told her that it was very unlikely, but if she had a question she should ask me. Well, now she has but she's not accepting my answer.
The larger issue here is that I'm her only Caregiver 24/7, and my concern is that a belief on her part of this type will lead to her not trusting me in other ways. My Mom is occasionally forgetful, but she's of sound mind, and I don't know whether something like this is an example of age-related dementia starting up, or is just a product of her imagination at night. Up until the last 3 months or so, she slept well at night but no longer does ... she will sleep for an hour or two, then sit up on the side of her bed for long periods of time. The house is quiet although I'm sure there are noises of this or that type, and her hearing is not good so quite likely she is misinterpreting at least some of those sounds.
Any ideas? She is on an anti-anxiety medication that worked well for her last spring, and her doctor put her back on it last week. She has stopped the fidgeting and picking at her skin, but it's also supposed to help her sleep and so far is not doing that for her at night.
Dementia, I believe, is a physical conditional of brain deterioration (of various etiologies), that affects memory, reasoning, language, cognition and sequencing, among other processes. It is NOT a normal part of aging.
You are correct, that your mother, whose ability to reason from facts has deteriorated, may start to not trust you in other ways.
You might want to get her in to have her checked for a uti. You most likely want her to have a full workup for dementia.
I could always straighten mom out by very patiently telling her that her mind was playing tricks on her . . . She was not thinking clearly because of her meds. Actually, she had dementia, but the meds story sounded true to her. Whatever works.
You might try that, and you might add TO that explanation that you want her to call you when she thinks something untoward is going on. "Then we can figure it out together, mom."