Mom is dying. She is barely eating and drinking and appears to be about 75 pounds now. Her eyes are sunken and just slits. Then she will eat a little, and keep going. They said she is strong, still gets out of bed, they don't know how she is so weak and drugged and with a fractured pelvis. She is mostly out of it, but still talking some, asking odd questions.
Today they moved her to another wing of the NH. I haven't been able to find out why, but my sister said from her observation it looks like people on that wing are really bad off so maybe its the terminal wing?
With her deafness, we can't even talk to her, and she no longer understand what we write on the whiteboard. We can't even tell her we love her, can't tell her its ok to go to be with Daddy.
How long can someone go on in this condition, days, weeks, months as long as she fights so hard, not even being aware of what is going on, where she is? Its horrible to watch her suffer in confusion.
Could it be that as long as she is semi lucid and will eat a little and drink a little without choking, so they don't put her out completely? I think they have tried to give her some quality of life and mental stimulation, moving her across from the nurses station to watch people when she is awake. Left in bed she struggles to get up, throws her blankets off, etc.
When I visit the Memory Care facility to see my cousin, I see 2 other residents who are similar to your mother, except they can not sit or get out of bed. One is always asleep. I do not understand how they are alive. It's heartbreaking.
I hope that you and your mom can find some peace.
It seems your mother is a very strong person (good for her!) but that strength is making her current decline more difficult. Hospice might have some suggestions to address her suffering, and I think that would be better than a different wing, unless that unit is a hospice one.