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Hope,

Yeah, ‘slow and steady’ is certainly a more realistic approach to life.

I must admit that I am a dreamer at times 😊. I dream about how wonderful things could be! You know, I find myself saying, ‘If only this or that…’

I certainly had to learn how to be patient many times in my life. It can be tough for us when our patience starts to run short.

Thanks for this reminder! All of us need inspiration every now and then.
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Hi NHWM - I agree - hitting a "fast forward" button would be really wonderful! I've had to learn the hard way thru my own life set-backs that "slow and steady" sometimes is the only option - although I, too, have had to accept "patient endurance" - I was listening to a Sunday morning sermon on TV with Joel Olstein two weeks ago, and he discussed this. The concept of having patience combined with endurance. It was really interesting and inspirational for me. I'm constantly having to remind my own self with that.
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Hope,

Thanks.

Don’t we all wish that we could hit a ‘fast forward’ button to speed things up for Lea? 😊

Then, she could proceed with life, experiencing a normal daily routine instead of struggling to do everyday tasks that most of us take for granted.

Wouldn’t that be nice?
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NHWM - what beautiful comments you have just written. It's so true that the body takes it's time in healing.

Lea, oh, I was so excited when I read the Vi B12 link and hoping it was something new - hopefully you'll be soon reaping the benefits of all that you're doing.

- wishing you a peaceful weekend XO
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Lea,

I hope that in time you will see some improvement in your ability to function normally.

I know that you don’t expect dramatic changes overnight. It’s going to take time to adjust.

Your body has gone through so many phases during your treatments. This type of situation takes such a toll on people who endure this trial and error approach.

I can’t imagine how much this affects you, physically and emotionally. You have worked diligently towards achieving your goals and then you are faced with more challenges to deal with.

I’m sure that you have your days where you feel as if it will never end.

On another thread, we are joking about what we would like to have written on our t-shirts. One of my favorites that was suggested was ‘DONE!’

I know that you so want to be ‘DONE!’ with feeling crappy and to be able to be independent again.

As always, sending my love to you.
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Bm
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HI Hope, I've been taking B12 for many months as University of Colo hospital recommended. What's caused my vestibular issue is a toxic reaction to the immunotherapy infusion I had on Feb 23. The double infusions of Yervoy and Opdivo are notorious for causing all types of horrible reactions including death. All of my bloodwork is normal in terms of vitamins, anemia etc.

Llama, Chuck is always home when I take a shower. I bring my walker in and he is close by. It was rough yesterday and knocked me out so I had to lie down afterward for the rest of the day. For some reason, the dizziness gets worse after a shower.

Cxmoody, when I wake up, I go into the family room and spend as long as I can in my recliner sitting up. Some days I make it till 3 pm, other days 4. Then I have to go lie down in bed. I try to walk the hallway if possible. I always get dressed, too. I go to the kitchen table for meals as well. No meals in bed or in the family room, even during my first cancer treatment when I had 102 fevers 24/7 and was bedridden with all sorts of horrible side effects. I'd hobble out to the kitchen for meals that Chuck prepared.
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.....HI Lea - I just wanted to add this important link below - it's from Southwest Integrative Medicine titled "Can Vi 12 Deficiency Cause Balance Problems" by Dr Robin Terranella. There's also a really interesting video included in the article with Dr Terranella - he discusses how nerves, the central nervous system, spinal cord/brain functions are interrelated to Vitamin 12. I think it's really worth watching the video.

https://www.google.com/url?esrc=s&q=&rct=j&sa=U&url=https://www.swintegrativemedicine.com/blog/can-b12-deficiency-cause-balance-problems&ved=2ahUKEwiqspqXgrSAAxV5pIkEHfroCOQQFnoECAAQAg&usg=AOvVaw2ofRHpEpNQ2MB7ZHcaMT6l
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Hi Lea - I was so sorry to read that you weren't feeling well and I really hope things shift for the better. I don't have experience in the medical field, so I usually back off from giving advice, but I just thought I'd ask this - do you happen to know if you have low Vitamin B levels?

Reason being, low vitamin B levels can cause dizziness and deficiencies in this may lead to a number of neurological problems of one feeling off-balance. I know that your situation is caused by different factors, but I wonder if it would be worth asking your doctor if getting Vitamin B shots would be beneficial for you in any way.

I used to go to my primary doctor for Vi B shots when I was working mega hours and I needed to replenish - it actually helped my energy, focus, mood, concentration. And at the very least, maybe it would help to feel a little better and to recharge. I also attached a link below from WebMD discussing the Vi 12 benefits for dizziness, vertigo and the immune system.
- Sending love and prayers for healing XO

https://www.google.com/url?esrc=s&q=&rct=j&sa=U&url=https://www.everydayhealth.com/news/10-surprising-facts-about-dizziness-vertigo/&ved=2ahUKEwivrbKW9rOAAxVbpokEHZVCDfUQFnoECAsQBg&usg=AOvVaw1I6LVJAziw2WB8bBCaqNzk
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Lea: Please be careful in the shower. I hope that Chuck can be home when you venture into the shower. I realize that six hours have gone by so I hope that it was accomplished. Hugs.
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Sending hugs out there to you, Lea. We will keep storming heaven on your behalf.

Does the dizziness keep you in bed, or are you able to sit up ever? Just want a glimpse into how you have to spend your days.
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I’m so sorry, Lea. I will continue to pray.

Please be careful in the shower. Is Chuck home to help you?
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Nhwm, I feel the same today, unfortunately. I truly believe my condition is permanent. The toxic reaction I experienced in February from the immunotherapy treatment, that is. The steroids did nothing major to help it, and when I stopped taking them, my body went back to the original condition it was in before the steroids. What'll take a year to clear up, potentially, is the eye issues, the moon face, and other side effects from the prednisone. That's my belief anyway. Nobody will be able to confirm or deny it, either, as the doctors are clueless. As the neurologist told me, this audiovestibular toxicity reaction could be permanent or it could clear up, he didn't know.

There is no value in suffering, let's face it. Certainly not for 7 months since this whole ordeal began in mid January. Today I'm getting in the shower no matter what. God help me 🙄

Thanks to everyone for your kind words, I really appreciate them. I'd so love to post that I'm fine and doing well, believe me.
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Lea,

Any better today? We would all love to hear that you are improving day by day.

I know that you are sick and tired of being sick and tired. Anyone who is suffering like you are would feel the same way.

I really don’t know how some people feel that there is value in suffering. Sometimes, I wonder if the people who make this claim, have suffered like you have during their lifetime.

It is so easy to say all sorts of nonsense when a person hasn’t experienced these things for themselves. Honestly, all they are doing is speculating because they have not experienced what you have.

My heart, prayers and love are with you today and always.

Wishing the very best for you, Lea! You have paid your dues. You have continued on when others would have given up.

You are much stronger than you probably think you are. I truly hope that this discomfort doesn’t last for an entire year or more.

We can get through just about anything as long as we know that is is temporary. It’s when it seems like it is never going to end, that it becomes so difficult to bear.
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Bm
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LL, "...side effects can take a year to go away..." The longest year ever, but still the faintest glimmer of hope. Still praying for you. xoxo
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I'm so sorry you're having these recurring issues, Lea. (((hugs))) and prayers for healing mercies.
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Lea: Sending love your way.
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Yay for two laps.

Boo on those dang steroids.

I pray that God gives you some sign of hope to end this week!
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Oh gosh, Lea!

Through this ordeal, you have really found out what you are made of, haven’t you?

Years ago. I watched a television special on the Bernie Madoff Ponzi scheme. Several people were interviewed.

For me, one person in particular stood out in the show. He was a psychiatrist, was married and they had children.

He looked forward to waking up early, enjoying his coffee in solitude and reading the newspaper. Then his wife woke up and had her coffee. She worked in his office. They rode together to the office on a daily basis.

Anyway, their comfortable routine was abruptly disrupted by what happened after they invested with Bernie Madoff.

One morning, he sat down with his coffee, opened the newspaper and saw the headlines about Madoff.

They had invested lots of money with Madoff. When his wife joined him at the kitchen table he said to her, “Brace yourself, today is the day that we find out what we are truly made of.”

It’s tough, because no one is ever truly prepared for catastrophe in their lives.

Your situation is even worse than people who lose their life savings. You have had a different kind of crisis. One where your actual life is involved. I can’t imagine how difficult this has been for you.

Wishing for all of this to be behind you, so you can lead a normal life again.

We all love you, Lea!
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NHWM, today is about the same, dizziness wise, but I was able to walk 2 sets of laps in the hall looking quite rickety. My eyesight is also blurry and just off the past month. Now I read that long term prednisone use can lead to glaucoma and cataracts (not old age related cataracts) and side effects can take a year to go away or be permanent. Ugh. I know this drug caused me more anguish than it cured, bc it's cured nothing. Oh, and my startle reflex is back too.....where I jump at loud noises. It had gone away w the Paxil but it's back again w no steroids 😑

My leg is sore and very bruised from where I fell out of bed. The skin is torn too. It'll be fine though, no big deal in the scheme of things.

I made an appointment for next Thurs for the IVIG and Aug 18th for my 3 month PET scan.
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Lea, oh, the fall out of bed must have been so very awful. I'm sorry for that happening. Hope that today will be a bit better.
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Geaton,

😊 Thanks for the chuckle! I love doing genealogy but I have no Brazilian heritage! LOL 😆 Predominantly British! Not Brazilian.
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LL, yes pls give an update if able.

Also, I misread NHWM's comment as "brazilian hugs" and I wondered how that was different than any other type of hug. Obviously, the heat is affecting me.
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How are you feeling today, Lea? I hope that you are doing better. I hate that you are going through all of this. You have had more than your share of heartache to deal with.

Sending a bazillion hugs your way today!
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Bm
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So sorry Leah . Hope better days start tomorrow . 🤗 (((hugs)))
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Big Hugs Lea. Sorry about the fall.
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Lea: I am so sorry that you endured that. Hugs.💕
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So sorry Lea that you had to go through that.
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