I had a friend ask me recently what I would do once my Mom is not around to care for.... I had to think...
Aside from maybe caring for my brother and/or sister, I would get back to the gym...I would also like to spend a few times per year visiting my daughter, who lives 8 hours away.... But, maybe the first thing I would do is clean my house.... My husband has been very supportive of my going to Mom's every day and staying until after dinner time. But, a thorough house cleaner he is not :-)....
How about you? What would you do?
Things I would do: going out to dinner with husband and kids, taking kids to amusement parks, going to the beach, having friends over, going out with friends, visiting my in-laws, going to birthday parties instead of turning down the invites, going on vacations, taking a cruise.
I might also pick up some of the embroidery, crochet or quilts I started a few dozen years ago. Just touching lovely fabric is soothing. In fact I think I'll spend some time in my studio rummaging through unfinished products. I do need to check on the yarn stash and see if it's still viable.
All in good time....
I started cleaning for Sister 2's business to earn some money to help with my expenses of going home. I work hard and I'm exhausted when I leave. Today's my final day--yay! A couple days ago, I traded my car for a car with 4-wheel-drive and a tow package so I can drive it home (I tried to sell my car that I bought here to take care of Mom but it didn't sell--a major stress for me and had no choice but to trade it in for a vehicle I could at least keep in the mountains). But it saves me a thousand dollars to rent a trailer rather than a renting a truck and a tow dolly.
I did much of Mom's business because Sister 1--her executor--blew off much of Mom's business because she couldn't handle it. She's finally stepping up and I tossed some final annoyances her way so I didn't have to.
Yesterday I got fed up because they had stopped clearing out Mom's house last week and I called a local charity that'll pick up Mom's unwanted but sellable items and set a day/time next week to pick it all up. I notified them all of the deadline (too many need a deadline to go into action).
There's a lot more but I've spewed too much for you good people who've helped me so much. Bottom line: by the end of the month I'll be HOME. After the moving trailer's empty and returned, I plan to slowly settle in, sleeping, eating, cuddling with my two dogs, and gently get my mental and emotional health back. Then I can start to again focus on re-writing a couple screenplays I started. Yesterday I thought about a sign for my door: "Do not disturb. I'm exhausted and I'm armed. Leave me alone. Seriously..."
She1934, that's a very eloquently described plan, as well as tribute to your spouse.
I had one last week that came to the door to put a flyer on my door for handyman services. Our town has a policy that any door-knockers other than religious or political have to have a permit to leave flyers or contact you in any way. So I usually remind them of that and ask to see their permit if they come knocking on my door - it usually sends them packing. This guy was something else. He came up to the door, and I happened to be walking past the door at the same time, so I went up and motioned "no" and pointed to the flyer on my door. He pointed at the headphones on his ears and flapped his hand at me as if blowing me off. I opened the door and asked him to take the flyer with him, because I was not interested - and did so politely. He gave an exasperated sigh, took the flyer, walked around the corner of my house and PUT IT ON THE OTHER DOOR!
OMG. I just about lost it. It was one of those days that you just *don't* want to deal with someone like that. So I went out, got the flyer (he flipped me off as he walked away) and called our city clerk to report someone soliciting without a permit, and gave them the phone number that was on the flyer.
Marketing lessons from this guy:
1) Follow the laws of the city you're soliciting in.
2) Don't piss off your potential customers. Acting like an a** when going door-to-door doesn't make anyone want to call you to book your services.
I swear, one of these days I'm going to invent a wired doormat that gives them a jolt....or an ejection doormat that sends them flying back out into the street.
Moose, It all seems so hard. I am not looking forward to having to sell my childhood home, and often have anxiety about that. I can't imagine having to do that if I was living in another state. I feel for you. Hugs.
Susan, I wish we had emojis... I would use an angry one. I dislike solicitors who don't listen. I could tell you a story of a phone solicitor when I told him to take my number off his list... , but his response was not one I could repeat here....
What I did once when some commonly known religious people were walking up and down the street, and they ignored my sign of "no religious, political, window, construction, salesmen, ...." and tried to save me anyways, was to wait until they got off the porch, went to their car, then I went outside and very visibly wrote down the license plate number, make, model and color of their car.
If I had it to do again, I would take my cell phone with me, get the car data, then pretend to make a call. Hopefully they would think I was calling the police.
Sometimes I've called the grocery stores that leave their ads on the porch and complimented them on hiring people who can't read (with no criticism of someone who is illiterate). They don't understand, so I explain that I have a no soliciting sign on my door, yet someone left ads or whatever on my porch for their store, so I assume that they hired someone who can't read.
There's always a long pause, so I end the call with complimenting them again but suggesting that they hire someone who can read as I don't appreciate having to pick up their trash. Then I hang up before they can figure out what to say.
We also have an ordinance against soliciting in our community.
MountainMoose, have a safe, pleasant and relaxing journey home.
MaPotter, I got responses like you did when I told off the guys pretending to be from Dell or Microsoft calling to alert me that my computer was "infected." Then I started toying with them, asking what kind of infection plagued my computer, what antibiotics I needed to put inside the computer to cure the infection, and more ridiculous retorts.
For several years I have had problems walking very far, like 100yds or more. So I haven't done any hiking here in Vegas. I would love to get out and do some of the hiking here.
There are really many places. Red Rock park and Valley of the Fire just to name two. Now with DW having dementia I have worries just going to collect the mail. So I read and collect some of the various tools of hiking and camping.
I had one call a few years back when I was still caregiving for Mom and was having a particularly rough day. He called on the landline phone (which we still had at the time) and was trying to sell me satellite tv service. I politely said we weren't interested and to take our number off his list. He responded rudely, "If you don't want sales calls, you shouldn't have your number in the phone book!"
I completely lost my cool with that one - Mom heard me say a few words she'd never heard me say in her presence before.
I still like the no soliciting sign I saw once:
We don't need a new vacuum.
We don't need a new roof.
We don't vote.
We've found Jesus.
Seriously....if you're not selling Thin Mints, GO AWAY!
Incredible....no wonder our country is in such bad shape.
Sign reads:
NO SOLICITATION
No Politics
No Religious Causes
No Flyers Left on Door
No Sales of Any Kind
Violators will be reported.
For the most part, it works - but there are always a few....