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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Because they are either still working, or are taking care of grandchildren because it's too expensive for the Moms to stay home like my mother did. Salaries have not kept up with inflation or cost of homes.
Or they are living their own lives. Live far away. Or they are avoiding the stress of an abusive parent.
cwillie, The grandparents on The Waltons did not need help. The old man worked in the shed still cutting wood with the son and the grandmother was always in the kitchen cooking. They probably just dropped dead one day like they all used to back then.
My great grandfather lived with my grandparents briefly. My grandparents were still working at the time. He did not need physical help, But they took him in because his memory was bad. I was like 4 not in school yet. After awhile they decided he needed to be checked on mid day. I remember going to my grandmother's house with my Mom and eating lunch with great grandpa. It didn't go on very long and one day great grandpa went to the hospital and that was that he was gone. I'm guessing heart attack or stroke. I also remember he would speak 1/2 English 1/2 Swedish , but when his memory got worse he only spoke Swedish.
I am caring for my mother Carol, who is 88 years old, living in assisted living with age-related decline, alzheimer's / dementia, anxiety, hearing loss, mobility problems, urinary tract infection, and vision problems.
About Me Caring for mom and dad. Dad at home and mom was in AL for over 3 years but fell in bathroom (she refuses to push her alert button for assistance) and broke her femur. I live out of state but travel to their state every chance I can.
Take your situation, for example. You aren't as readily available to your parents because you live out of state and do not want to relocate, I would imagine.
When people used to mention my ability to be there to take care of my mom (either positively or negatively) I used to quip that if I had a life I wouldn't be there either.
I will never understand the people who come to this forum who have given up careers, marriages, or abandoned their own children in deference to their parents. I never would have moved in with mom if it hadn't made sense - I just happened to be between jobs and had no commitments to a partner or children, and because my jobs had always been low wage her ability to provide room and board and a small salary also made sense financially (a win win situation for both of us).
For me, when I am 85 my oldest daughter will be 58 and my younger one 50. They will still be holding down jobs and can't afford to leave them. Also, people are working longer than 67. I know a couple still working at 74.
Some children of older adults provide full time care in their homes, others move into their parent’s home to provide care, others oversee care in assisted living or memory care or a nursing home. Some have parents who spent many years treating them cruelly or abusively and they don’t feel it’s in their best emotional interest to be readily available for further poor treatment. Some have tried again and again to be readily available and their efforts have been rejected or ridiculed. Some have worked out a system that works just fine for both parties. So, in summary, this is much like anything else in life, looked at one at a time rather than lumped together and judged as a whole.
This supposes that elder care used to be taken care of by the family in previous generations, and other than in the TV show the Waltons I'm not sure that was even true.
I think the better question here would be....why would children of older adults need to be readily available for their parents? Older parents have had their life and now their children have just as much right to have theirs. Children are NOT ones retirement or care plan.
What's your definition of an "older adult"? My husband and I are PoAs for 3 LOs ages 89, 94 and 104. We have adult children of our own who need help with their kids (our grandkids). My husband and I are still working 3/4 of the time, so not retiring for the next few years. We are in a "sandwich" of needs.
What do you mean by "readily available"? That our seniors are not living in homes and we're not providing hand-on help ourselves? We're still readily available to them...
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Or they are living their own lives. Live far away. Or they are avoiding the stress of an abusive parent.
My great grandfather lived with my grandparents briefly. My grandparents were still working at the time. He did not need physical help, But they took him in because his memory was bad. I was like 4 not in school yet. After awhile they decided he needed to be checked on mid day. I remember going to my grandmother's house with my Mom and eating lunch with great grandpa.
It didn't go on very long and one day great grandpa went to the hospital and that was that he was gone. I'm guessing heart attack or stroke. I also remember he would speak 1/2 English 1/2 Swedish , but when his memory got worse he only spoke Swedish.
I am caring for my mother Carol, who is 88 years old, living in assisted living with age-related decline, alzheimer's / dementia, anxiety, hearing loss, mobility problems, urinary tract infection, and vision problems.
About Me
Caring for mom and dad. Dad at home and mom was in AL for over 3 years but fell in bathroom (she refuses to push her alert button for assistance) and broke her femur. I live out of state but travel to their state every chance I can.
Take your situation, for example. You aren't as readily available to your parents because you live out of state and do not want to relocate, I would imagine.
I will never understand the people who come to this forum who have given up careers, marriages, or abandoned their own children in deference to their parents. I never would have moved in with mom if it hadn't made sense - I just happened to be between jobs and had no commitments to a partner or children, and because my jobs had always been low wage her ability to provide room and board and a small salary also made sense financially (a win win situation for both of us).
Some have tried again and again to be readily available and their efforts have been rejected or ridiculed.
Some have worked out a system that works just fine for both parties.
So, in summary, this is much like anything else in life, looked at one at a time rather than lumped together and judged as a whole.
Older parents have had their life and now their children have just as much right to have theirs.
Children are NOT ones retirement or care plan.
What do you mean by "readily available"? That our seniors are not living in homes and we're not providing hand-on help ourselves? We're still readily available to them...