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Katinikwoo--
I read most of the posts and my heart is just breaking for you!

You are simply and angel on earth. I'm pretty sensitive and usually the one who does all the CG in my extended family--but I would not do as much as you are doing.

Maybe it's not love anymore--who even knows what form love takes? But it is most definitely the most unconditional 'love' of care I think I have read on this site.

I'm sure you will do what is best and right for your wife and your situation. It's amazing how much we will put up with when handed terrible things to deal with.
Shoot, my DH won't even talk to me if he's out of sorts, much less actually CARE for me if I am sick. You, sir are a saint.

I hope, for your own sake, that you receive some counseling of some type starting as soon as possible. Getting ready for the big 'boom' that will come when your wife dies. The anticipatory grief is often much worse than the real thing. Grieving what could have, should have, might have been--and wasn't. And beating yourself up over not being more for your LO.

You can rest assured you have done enough and more than enough. I can only add my prayers to you that this will end soon and as peacefully as possible. I also hope you can mend fences with your kids. Obviously, they were very affected by their mom's mental illnesses. Hopefully you can then move forward and have a life that so long has been out of reach.

((Hugs))
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Katnikwoo,
Have you looked into the insurance aspect of in-patient hospice?
There is something called the community spouse (that would be you), and how you separate and keep so much assets so that you will not become impoverished by your wife's medical expenses.

I cannot explain it, but let someone know if you have not done the financial planning for the next step. Or in the search bar, try "community spouse".
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Hi Kat , I had 2 schizophrenic brothers and both Have Passed . Craigs Birthday is today - He Passed March 19, 2008 - My Poor mom was a full time caregiver for Both her sons and they Lived in Half way House . After Craig Passed she went down Hill and eventually got dementia . My Brother William got sick a Lot and fortunately she Passed before Him - I cared for him the Last One and a half years of His Life so I Took On the Mother Role and he Lived with Me . I had him in My apartment living with me for 6 Months after he got chemo - what I did Not Know is he was Bi- Polar and Manic too . I feel for you . I dont Know how My Mom did it all those years ? Billy got sick at 16 in 1978 and Craig around 1985. Craig had a bad reaction to Clozaril - sudden death . No One truly Knows what schizophrenia is Like But dementia comes close . I do Holistic things for Myself Like Community acupuncture - Try That for your self -
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