I have POA on my father he lives in his own home with my brother and his partner. Now, he needs things done to his house because they aren't doing anything to improve the house. They don't pay rent or contribute anything financial to the home. I've tried to take care of things but I'm not allowed in the house because it's a hostile environment and I don't want to upset my father. So, I stay away. Now my sister who lives in another state is mad at me because of what's going on? Instead of being mad at my brother for the situation She blames me. I don't know what to do? It's not going to be good if I have to get help from outside the family.
If you are unable to handle yourself like an adult in the 'hostile environment' that is your father's home, ask the police to go with you when you have to go there. They will within reason.
Now all of you are adults here. So the ridiculous, childish, petty nonsense of this one is mad at you and that one is mad at the other has to stop. You're the one in charge because you're the one with the POA.
So you call for a sit-down with your brother and sister (boyfriends and significant others are left out). Then you lay it out. All BS and nonsense cease immediately. The necessary work and repairs get done on the house so your father can live safely and decently. The boyfriend running his big mouth to your father, and I'm sure this upsets the old man, stops at once too. Otherwise you, the POA will put your father's house on the market and he will be placed in long term care facility because he doesn't deserve to live in chaos and turmoil. It is your legal and moral duty to see that he doesn't if he's mentally incompetent.
If it comes to this (and it may) your brother and his boyfriend are out on the street because the house will have to be sold to pay for it. Your complaining sister in another state will be getting ZERO inheritance when your father passes if he goes into care.
I think your brother and sister will put the brakes on the BS here if you behave like a serious adult and lay it out plainly what actions you will take if they don't wise up.
Dysfunctional families try to keep their dirt locked up inside the family structure where everyone has been schooled not to rock the dirty boat.
But guess what? You don't have to abide by their dysfunctional rules. You can BE the change. Don't expect them to like you for it, however. Get help from outside in whatever way you think will work. Then congratulate yourself for overcoming the dysfunction that has controlled all of you since - hmmm, when? A therapist could help you sort that out.
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/how-do-i-get-someone-who-is-verbally-abusive-out-of-my-fathers-home-487694.htm
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/im-poa-for-my-father-but-my-brother-lives-with-him-he-doesnt-take-very-good-care-of-him-and-he-takes-484181.htm
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/what-to-do-about-my-brother-481435.htm
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/how-can-i-stop-my-brother-from-trying-to-take-over-care-of-my-father-466948.htm
Maybe resign as his PoA. If you aren't going to be effective and work in your Father's best interests, then what's the point? Tell him to assign someone else or if he doesn't he'll become a ward of a third-party court assigned guardian who will then at some point kick out your brother and partner.
Also, if your PoA is legitimately active, this means your Father cannot now change anything legally: not his PoA, nor his Will, etc.
And, you have the authority to kick out your brother and partner. You just have to have the courage to do so. If there's no written lease you can file for an eviction which happens after 30 days of posting the notice. If they don't leave you can (probably, based on your Father's home state) have the police escort them off the property. Then you change all the locks. But then who will provide the caregiving for your Father? Can he afford agency aids? Or should the house get sold to pay for his care in a facility?
But if your Father doesn't have a medical diagnosis... your PoA will never be active until this happens. You will remain a legally powerless bystander, regardless of what he's been allowing you to do for him to this point.
IF neither are active, it's all your father's job to see to everything. He can have whoever living with him that he wants.
If it is financial and active, you kick your brother out. That is a financial decision. Whoever has the financial POA deals with managing the money for your father's care and well being, even selling the home if needed. it is Not about ensuring an inheritance for anyone.
If it is medical and active, you can place your father into a care home environment so that he is not being taken advantage of and his medical needs are seen to.
Is your father suffering from dementia? If so and your POA is activated by the required letters from physicians, then you can choose to place him in care.
Or is he mentally competent in his own choices. If that is true then he has a right to have whomever he wants living with him and helping him out.
So this is something to discuss with your Dad and come to conclusions about whether you need to take over ALL FINANCES given your dad's inability to protect his home, getting repairs, paying taxes and etc, and whether or not he is safe in the care of your bro and his partner.
The fact that you are POA and the brother won't let you in? Ummmmm. Not good. You cannot serve as POA and be unable to see someone who requires your care.
I fear this may come down to a visit with APS and ask for their advice. You may need to resign the POA. You may need to place father out of the reach of brother's influence. This ALL DEPENDS UPON the competence (or not) of your Dad.