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Have you tried volunteering? I volunteer for a VNA Hospice. The people in the volunteer group are very nice & friendly. We have monthly meetings and some meet outside the group too. Also the volunteer work itself is very satisfying. We provide respite visits to help caregivers of the terminally ill. Caregivers get a much needed break and time to keep appts and do shopping etc. It is very satisfying to help out. The hospice clients themselves are often good company. We read to them or converse as client desires. Surely there is a church or community group in your area for whom you could do some volunteering.
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Lots of good ideas here--
Do you have old family pictures or letters that you could compile into an album, or write down all the old family stories that you can remember?
I have heard of hospitals asking for volunteers to hold babies; and not just babies while they are in the hospital. I spent July 4 with my daughter-in-law (my son had to work) and they have just moved into a new house. She said the best help I could be was to hold their 3-month old baby so she could get unpacking done without having to worry about him. (Both my son and grandson are late babies, so it's fun having a new grandson as well as grown-up ones.) If you like babies, you might ask the hospital if there are new moms at home alone with babies that could use a break during the day.
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Go back to school. That's what I did. I just got my PhD at 63. It will keep your thinking clear, challenge you, and you'll meet new friends. Also, learn to enjoy your alone time; read a good book, paint a room, volunteer somewhere. There's lots to do. If u r handicapped, take online courses. Life is too fun to be bored. Go for a walk.
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Is there anywhere you could volunteer?
You should try to get some relief for UTI. Your dr can prescribe a prophylactic antibiotic or a vaginal estrogen cream can help with UTIs. They could also give you an extra script to take when you travel just in case. Then you could travel and visit family or friends.
It seems like you are spending time on household things and doing for others. Which many of us tend to do. You need to find a way to do something for yourself.
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Wow, you have a very busy life. Maybe you are lonely for having your husband around with you during the day. I say go for a day or two periodically. I just lost my mom a month ago. My dad 38 yrs ago and my brother 46 yrs ago. I am 65 no kids, husband. My siblings and their families live hundreds of miles away. Even my closets friend live far away. I have no talent. I work part-time but I am HAPPY. When you are not in a happy state of mind it is easy to make it worse. You make rosaries so I would think God is part of your life. Pray He does answer, you may not recognize His answer right away or you think it should be something else. Pray to be happy. I even thank God for allowing me not to be drug addict or a criminal. Today's world that is a blessing. I'm not even what I consider is a holy/religious person but I know God is there when I need Him. Do you listen to music? I find that is a good way to brighten your day, sing along. You can do it!!!! You said you had a UTI and that can definitely affect your state of mind. Drink cranberry juice that is a well know preventative measure.
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I'm sorry to hear how you feel. I know its tough. I think we could be 7 years old or 73 years old but sometime it is hard to know how to fill our days. I struggle with this too since my father passed away. I know everyone is different. For myself, I continue to go to work every day. I have tried painting classes, cooking classes, and going to the movies on my own.

I know you mentioned you live in a small town. But maybe even going for daily walks will help clear the mind. If you have access to a computer, watching movies, listening to music, learning a new hobby, reading, meditating, or yoga. I know its easier said than done. I have to force myself to try new things. I am still grieving my dad, and normally after I get into the car and come home, I still cry. It takes time to find a new normal or even a new hobby that excites us.

Take care of yourself. I hope you find something that brings you more joy.
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Another thought--I run a small family business, and it keeps me busy and in touch with people. Is there anyone in your small town who has a small retail business that could use help a couple of hours a day or so to get a break, or just to have someone to take phone calls as needed, or cashier? I've gotten to know a lot of really nice people through my store, both customers and staff. I've almost always had one part time person, sometimes a student, a mom with kids in school during the day, some retired folks.
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kssfgirl: Okay, this is not mission impossible, but right now it seems like it to you. You are suffering from depression and need to see a psychiatrist asap who will dose you with meds, which should get you back to wellness. (((Big Hugs)))
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I had the same thought as Lizzywho61. Go visit that friend!

Also, when my mother entered her 70s, she began doing volunteer work. There are many organizations who need volunteers. It's a wonderful way to feel like your life is still fulfilling and meaningful. In my mother's case, after about a year teaching English as a Second Language to immigrants, they offered her a paid job doing it. She did that right up until she got sick. She LOVED it, and she made all kinds of new friends who were there for her during her illness.
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Sorry to hear you are lonely. I'd like to challenge you; if you are suffering from anxiety around your health and your life but self-limit and say that you will not fly because of anxiety, I think you absolutely need to fly!! Get out of dodge for a while; pack some UTI meds and cranberry juice and get on a plane!! Go to Spain and have a mini affair with a Matador! By the time your husband pulls himself out of the potato patch, he wont even notice you've gone! Also, by giving yourself the freedom of travel and the inspiration it provides, you will most likely also inspire your family! You sound like a typical older woman who has spent a lifetime taking care of others. So, forget them for a minute and do YOU!! Remember your dreams!! See them, do them. NOW!
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Hi, i'm sorry to hear about your situation,i fully understand how you feel as i'm in the same situation,its not easy, you need to keep occupied if that's possible, its a shame you are so far away but i have lots of friend which i keep in touch with via email,i'm happy to chat if you ever get too lonely....
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I know you mentioned you didnt like the farm but do you like getting out in nature? Gardening? Walking the dogs? Going for a drive? (With dogs ;)) i guess if you dont have dog would be good time to get one! Writing to us and other sites, blogging. Painting, crafting, organizing. Joining groups that have telephone conference calls. Journaling important events in your life, scrapbooking. Even simple games like silly ones online. Anything you can do to help others? Start now making stockings to give away at christmas. Call mission or foodbank to see if they need help. Loneliness, they say is one cause of physical illness so we have to try and combat it. I suggest to try anything you can. It is never too late to start something new...even college classes nowadays have courses that are amazing and not difficult. Please stay in touch. You are not alone.
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