I travel frequently for work and pleasure. I recently moved my mom from her home several states away to a wonderful assisted living home near me.
Recently while I was away Mom's phone died on a Saturday. I submitted an on-line request for a repair but it took the phone company until Thursday to repair it. She couldn't call he phone company because they make you do everything on-line, so she wasn't reassured. She could use the phone in the office and of course they would have helped her in an emergency but she was in a panic and felt abandoned. Now she's more clingy than ever.
How can I reassure her that in an emergency the staff would have acted with greater urgency as the situation would have required? She isn't abandoned at all. She insists I don't understand and while they're nice people they can't be counted on.
She insists that you don't understand, and that while they are nice people they can't be counted on. And her solution to this is ... ?? What is it she really wants? To come live with you? To have you stop traveling and be with her every day? To be 20 years younger and live with your father in their own home? What she wants may not be something she can have. (Just like the rest of us, alas. I sure don't get everything I really want.)
I don't know whether it would help matters or hurt to be talking about the real issues instead of talking about telephone repair service. How long has it been since she moved? Does she just need more time to feel "at home" in her new surroundings?
The staff didn't call maintenance until Monday. If I had been there, I couldn't have done anything differently. The assisted living staff could have been more empathetic. The phone company just works at it's own speed. She just felt that no one thought it was an emergency like she did.
I've seen them respond quickly in a medical emergency. And I have every confidence they would act appropriately. Mom just doesn't share my confidence and I don't know how to reassure her. She also makes a bigger deal out of inconveniences than she should.
You travel. Your mother cannot depend on your constant presence or even that you will always be nearby or available. That is, perhaps, sad for her, but it is also fact.
Does your mother need more care than assisted living?
I'm not sure what Austin would have you make a big stink about. What should the AL have done that they did not do?
I guess I'm missing a piece to this puzzle.