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Years ago I walked in on a housekeeper stealing from me. It’s very disturbing. I fired her on the spot. She started telling me a sob story and I told her that had she told me that she was struggling I would have given her the items that she was stealing but now I couldn’t trust her so she couldn’t stay in my home.

Sorry, I don’t have time to read all of the answers.

It’s a shame that your caregiver failed to show up. When your aunt called her with an alias did she confront her about not showing up for work? I’m so sorry this has happened to your family.

Hopefully, you will find a suitable replacement.
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It could be any one of many reasons - some of them we can't even fathom but people do weird things. They don't feel loyalty (in most cases) and if it is inconvenient or if something better comes along, they just go. No one knows what goes on in the minds of people. Depending on how serious all the known facts are, you can try to get to the bottom of it but odds are you will never really know. Keep looking, explain all duties and responsibilities, agree upon them and have it written in a legal document for the protection of all. If possible, check out past references. What else can you do?
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I have not had much luck with caregivers not only personally or at AL. It is a low paying job, it is very demanding not only physically but mentally as well.

Through my experience with caregivers I came to realize that if you find a reliable person pay her in gold as it is well worth it. Not even through agencies they are reliable.

Theft I have been lucky so far with nothing being stolen. I tent to believe that people are good with great intentions but low pay and family issues and plentiful opportunities they just walk.

Best of luck to you
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Imho, yes, I had sub par experiences with an aide who I had hired for my late mother. She was cheating her on hours worked, e.g. was "clocking in and clocking out/reporting to her supervisor" for a total of 3 and one half hours worked, when her actual time on the job was only 40 minutes. I reported her to her supervisor and she never set foot in my mother's home again. Side note - my mother had hired her boyfriend to lay down a new kitchen floor and this gentleman took many shortcuts UNTIL I discovered them and reported it.
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My first guess is drugs. and/or alcohol.
Thieves keep a good thing going until the jig is up. If anything, a thief would pose to be a model employee.
Those in the midst of falling off the wagon behave exactly as you've described.
.
However, "this lady" is no longer your problem. It's time to move on.
Next go-round, don't allow the caregiver to run the show.
She/he works for you.
Politely-but firmly-make your expectations clear during the interview.
Expect nothing less from day one.
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It's not clear from your post who the point of contact is; you say "we" hired someone... it's really best to have ONE person in the family be the point of contact/employer (with a backup of course, but only for real emergencies, .e.g., the point of contact is in the hospital, etc.). A single point of contact makes for less confusion and simpler communication. The aide should have a SINGLE supervisor in the family to whom they are accountable - a single person who sets the schedule, defines responsibilities, renders payment, etc. (And that supervisor is usually NOT going to be the person being cared for.) The person who's actually being cared for should not be permitted to confuse things by taking on parts of this role - if that happens, the aide should know they can go to the point of contact for resolution of any conflicting directives/information.

Also, I know taking care of all of the formal administration involved in properly paying freelancers can be an extra hassle, but it's really not worth getting into potential problems by paying someone off the books for long term assignments. You can hire services to manage the administration for you at reasonable cost. And yes, it may mean you have to shell out more in the end to cover taxes, insurance etc., but you don't want to get into a situation for example, where heaven forbid, the aide gets hurt on the job and wants restitution.
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