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I want to have POA taken from him and help her to divorce him? What steps would I need to take in order take power of Attorney away from him and to make sure he has to continue to financial support her?
poa is an arrangement about trusting someone to care for your finances in a responsible way . that duty and where he parks his wang on occasion shouldnt be all that interconnected . i recently considered trying to obtain medical poa for my aunt because i have a habit of listening to medical professionals wheras my cuz pretty much just eats , s*its and squawks . ( kinda like a chicken ) . however after thinking about it for a while i decided my demented aunt so close to her end of life doesnt need family controversy . so in essence i put her well being first like a designated poa should be doing .
Does your mother have capacity? If so, she can amend her POA any time she likes.
Is your mother aware of your father's infidelity? If so, does she want to divorce him? If not, were you thinking of enlightening her?
Be very careful. Fools rush in where angels fear to tread, and your parents' relationship may have complexities which no one, not even you, could possibly understand. Unless your mother discovered this for herself, and has decided for herself that she is prepared to divorce your father because of it, you would do better to support her in dealing with her illness and leave your father to deal with his own life in his own way.
So sorry to read about your Mom's terminal illness. Depending on the attorneys representing both sides in a divorce, there is no guarantee that your Dad would be required to financially take care of your Mom. A Judge might consider dividing the assets in half is enough. Thus, it could render your Mom with less financial support as your Dad would no longer be around.
And the time line, depending on how the divorce laws are written in your State, a divorce could take anywhere from months to over a year. Some divorce cases can drag out for many years, thus quite expensive for both sides. Would you really want your Mom to go through all the stress and cost of a divorce? It can be extremely draining.
Unless your mom is mentally incompetent she has the power to name a new POA and/or seek a divorce. How ill is your mom, and does she know what is going on? Is it affecting his daily relationship with her, his care for her? I understand your outrage, but my advice would be to take a deep breath and slow down. Perhaps she would be better served at this point in her life if everyone can maintain the status quo.
I think for the POA to be taken away from him it would have to be shown that either he is not fulfilling his responsibilities or is misusing your mom's financial resources.
It is wrong that he is cheating on her, but I'm not sure marital cheating can build a case unless it is causing him to not do his job as her POA and is misusing her funds.
Unless that is going on and you have proof of his not doing his POA responsibilities, then I think your only recourse is to file for guardianship.
To get guardianship, your mother would need to have 2 doctors to declare her incompetent and someone would need to pay about $5,000 to bring this case to court. Would she qualify as incompetent?
I'm sorry that she is terminally ill. At what stage would you say her terminal illness is? Is she up for her competency being evaluated? Is she up to filing for a divorce from your dad?
If she is still competent and her terminal illness does not keep her from doing so, she could revoke her husband's POA and make you her POA. that a possible option?
I don't know if a POA or a guardian can file for a divorce in someone's behalf? I know this must be heartbreaking but does your mother know he is cheating on her? For a divorce to take place, I do believe that your mother would need to be the person to file for it and she would need to be able to endure and pay for the trial.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
i recently considered trying to obtain medical poa for my aunt because i have a habit of listening to medical professionals wheras my cuz pretty much just eats , s*its and squawks . ( kinda like a chicken ) . however after thinking about it for a while i decided my demented aunt so close to her end of life doesnt need family controversy . so in essence i put her well being first like a designated poa should be doing .
Is your mother aware of your father's infidelity? If so, does she want to divorce him? If not, were you thinking of enlightening her?
Be very careful. Fools rush in where angels fear to tread, and your parents' relationship may have complexities which no one, not even you, could possibly understand. Unless your mother discovered this for herself, and has decided for herself that she is prepared to divorce your father because of it, you would do better to support her in dealing with her illness and leave your father to deal with his own life in his own way.
And the time line, depending on how the divorce laws are written in your State, a divorce could take anywhere from months to over a year. Some divorce cases can drag out for many years, thus quite expensive for both sides. Would you really want your Mom to go through all the stress and cost of a divorce? It can be extremely draining.
How does she/do you know about this cheating?
What is she trying to accomplish with the divorce? Could she achieve the same thing by changing her will?
It is wrong that he is cheating on her, but I'm not sure marital cheating can build a case unless it is causing him to not do his job as her POA and is misusing her funds.
Unless that is going on and you have proof of his not doing his POA responsibilities, then I think your only recourse is to file for guardianship.
To get guardianship, your mother would need to have 2 doctors to declare her incompetent and someone would need to pay about $5,000 to bring this case to court. Would she qualify as incompetent?
I'm sorry that she is terminally ill. At what stage would you say her terminal illness is? Is she up for her competency being evaluated? Is she up to filing for a divorce from your dad?
If she is still competent and her terminal illness does not keep her from doing so, she could revoke her husband's POA and make you her POA. that a possible option?
I don't know if a POA or a guardian can file for a divorce in someone's behalf? I know this must be heartbreaking but does your mother know he is cheating on her? For a divorce to take place, I do believe that your mother would need to be the person to file for it and she would need to be able to endure and pay for the trial.