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My Mom quit bathing very often years ago, in her 80's I think. Usually just once a week but with meticulous personal hygiene after the bathroom. She broke her hip at 90 but recovered really well and continued to bath herself but only once in one to two weeks. Once she waited three weeks and I told her she had to take a bath. She really got upset with me, threatened to move into a nursing home near my sister. About a year ago, she fell several times, no injury but I realized it was time to help her start bathing. I was shooting for once a week but she was resistant and sometimes we went two weeks. She was uncomfortable with me bathing her though and it made me crazy too. So last February I hired a caregiver to come in once a week to bath her. At first she didn't like the idea of a stranger coming in; again she said something about going to live with my sister. This time I just laughed and said "no way." We brought in that caregiver and now she looks forward to her weekly baths (most of the time). However a couple of weeks ago our caregiver had to reschedule to the next day and Mom came into the kitchen to inform me that it would be okay with her if she only got a bath "once a month." Couldn't help it I cracked up; told her "no way." She really is pretty cooperative now, kinda like a little kid. But just thought the "once a month" idea was too funny.

It just seems to be a thing with some older people I guess. She's still pretty careful about her personal hygiene after the bathroom, she tries, but it's getting more difficult.
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My mom doesn't have dementia, but she doesn't bathe as often as I'd like her to. She generally takes a full shower once a week or week and a half. At their ages, they don't sweat nearly as much and their skin is dry and thin, so it's not like us younger people who would be stinking to high heaven after a week. My mom also does sponge baths several times a week. But it's a struggle for sure to keep her on track. Once she does shower, she feels great, but getting her in there is like your mom - a million excuses.

I tried what Jinx suggested, setting a date and reminding her over and over again. On the appointed day/time, she'd still balk. So then I changed my plan of attack and would just would go over and say, "We're going to shower now." I learned after one screaming/crying it had to be earlier in the morning, because she gets tired in the afternoon. So try to figure out when might be the best time for your mom and then do what you can. And my mom is like yours, she can't remember a day later something gross (in my mom's case, she had bugs in her pantry because she kept leaving open cookies and crackers around. Bugs crawling everywhere. It was DISGUSTING! She'd forgotten the whole thing a day later. But I didn't. Shudders.) Good luck with your mom...
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What about asking when she wants to wash her hair? Suggest day after tomorrow at ? 3pm or whatever time she is usually "good." Remind her that she agreed to that date, 3 or 4 times a day. On the day, remind her every hour. Start collecting the things you need to do it in the sink. I don't know if it would work, but it might.

Good luck. Also see about antianxiety drugs.
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My Mom, almost 88 will not shower or take a bath at all, so we do sink baths. The only problem is not being able to wash her hair. For $2 or $3 some beauty shops will wash their hair for you. And if they have a wash and dry haircut it doesn't even have to be styled. My Mom does not like to get her diaper changed. She will hang on to it for dear life when I try to take it off her. I try to be reasonable but after about five to ten minutes I thank the person who invented the tearaway ones. After they come off she is ok and we just put on new ones and her pants back on and go and watch tv. It is the same way with her jammie top also. Any suggestions. She has been with my husband and me for five year.
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As it turned out Mom relented and did wash her hair....in the kitchen sink. We had quite a time as she has dandruff or something like cradle cap that babies get and it just kept coming lose and honestly had us both sick. It took about 1 hour and washing her hair 7 times and her scrubbing it with her nails to get this stuff off of her head. I was told about a year ago by her beautician that she had dandruff and needed Head and Shoulders to get rid of it, she is still using that bottle and it is almost full, which leads me to believe that she is not actually washing her hair in the shower, but just wetting it!

I hoped the washing episode would be so gross to her that she would not forget it, but by this evening when I mentioned to her that she would need to wash her hair 2 times a week with the special shampoo to keep that stuff off her scalp, she had no idea what I was talking about.

So the next time she bathes it will be the whole ordeal all over again of just trying to get her to wash her hair and bathe......period
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I googled that same question a few months ago and that is how I found this site.It was the best thing to happen for me. The answer I received was once a week is good. That helped, as I was trying for every other day. Once a week is a whole lot easier.
Getting them to actually do it is the real problem. My mom would rather not,but doesn't give me near the grief, you, and a lot of others go through. Stay tuned....someone here has an answer to help you, I'm sure. Good Luck!
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