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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Let the person know they're hurting your feelings with this type of talk, and you'll be leaving their presence each and every time the topic is broached. Even with dementia, they'll likely catch on.
It’s tough. I am sorry that you are going through this.
Even if a person is aware of a parent’s dementia, it still hurts and doesn’t take your frustration and pain away.
I’m curious, has your parent always been this way? Throwing the past up in your face? Or is this relatively new behavior?
There is absolutely no point in throwing the past up in someone’s face. First of all, the only thing it accomplishes is making them angry.
I think people should question why they do this. It isn’t helpful for them or the person that they are humiliating. They only think it makes them feel better and perhaps it does temporarily but in the long run, it is only prolonging everyone’s suffering.
People can be stuck in the past with or without dementia. It’s truly sad.
Adding one more thing, no one, absolutely no one wants to be remembered for the last mistakes that they made. I so wish that people could understand that doing this is completely futile behavior.
We will give more custom feedback with more information,
You might watch some Teepa Snow videos and see if they are helpful to help you recognize behaviors that are part of dementia and techniques to help you guide them past the bumps in the road.
With anyone who is angry, try what will help them regain their composure. Change of scenery, soothing music, ice cream, phone call to favorite Grand etc.
If possible see if you can find a therapist for you and one for them. Medicare pays for therapy and it allows the person to be heard.
If your person has dementia, know that this could be a stage as they forget the hurts. Usually some other symptom will appear as that one fades as dementia is progressive.
Try reading a little about rumination to see if that fits your loved one.
Since you put ur question under Dementia I will assume your dealing with someone who is suffering from it. Know that even early on, a person suffering from Dementia cannot be reasoned with. Short-term memory is the first to go. The ability to process what is being said to them goes as does empathy. They become self-centered because their world is becoming smaller and confusing. And paranoia sets in.
You respond with "I am sorry" It will just be said the next day. Some times they get in loops and won't let go. You come into their world, don't expect them to understand yours.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
”I’ve been meaning to ask you, what did you dad used to do for a living?”
redirecting works well with my MIL.
Even if a person is aware of a parent’s dementia, it still hurts and doesn’t take your frustration and pain away.
I’m curious, has your parent always been this way? Throwing the past up in your face? Or is this relatively new behavior?
There is absolutely no point in throwing the past up in someone’s face. First of all, the only thing it accomplishes is making them angry.
I think people should question why they do this. It isn’t helpful for them or the person that they are humiliating. They only think it makes them feel better and perhaps it does temporarily but in the long run, it is only prolonging everyone’s suffering.
People can be stuck in the past with or without dementia. It’s truly sad.
We will give more custom feedback with more information,
You might watch some Teepa Snow videos and see if they are helpful to help you recognize behaviors that are part of dementia and techniques to help you guide them past the bumps in the road.
With anyone who is angry, try what will help them regain their composure. Change of scenery, soothing music, ice cream, phone call to favorite Grand etc.
If possible see if you can find a therapist for you and one for them. Medicare pays for therapy and it allows the person to be heard.
If your person has dementia, know that this could be a stage as they forget the hurts. Usually some other symptom will appear as that one fades as dementia is progressive.
Try reading a little about rumination to see if that fits your loved one.
https://theocdandanxietycenter.com/rumination/
Since you put ur question under Dementia I will assume your dealing with someone who is suffering from it. Know that even early on, a person suffering from Dementia cannot be reasoned with. Short-term memory is the first to go. The ability to process what is being said to them goes as does empathy. They become self-centered because their world is becoming smaller and confusing. And paranoia sets in.
You respond with "I am sorry" It will just be said the next day. Some times they get in loops and won't let go. You come into their world, don't expect them to understand yours.