My dad walks...not wanders, walks. Any advice?

I'm very sad that you can't recognize that if dad can't navigate via his own GPS device and get home, then he needs more oversight than is currently being provided for him.

Read Atul Gawande On Being Mortal. You clearly are trying to keep dad happy-- an admirable goal. Just understand that it may not line up with keeping him safe as well.

Many of us here say " My parent could never be happy with....." and then they end up in that situation and thrive. Something to think about.

Yes, dementia is a symptom, not a disease. And there really aren't "treatable" dementias, although there are lots of things a person can do to slow the process considerably, such as exercise, controlling general health factors such as hypertension, diet, neutraceuticals etc. There is no evidence that the medications delay progression more than a few months. Two years ago, my dad was driving, shopping, cooking, gardening, walking with, and taking care of my mom, who has small vessel disease dementia due to hypertension. When my mom tripped and broke her hip, she had to be out of the house for 4 months, as she needed 24 hour care and my dad wouldn't consent to 24 hour caregivers in their house. He was sure he could take care of her, even in her condition. they have just been independent like that. So she was at my house while she recouped enough to get around and just need daytime care. They hadn't been separated for more than 6 weeks total in 65 years. It was an incredibly stressful period, where all the family attention was focused on getting mom well, and dad just lost it. Stress causes brain inflammation and brain inflammation causes eventually dementia. During that time while she was gone, he voluntarily gave up driving, and quit doing many of the things he had always done. When she returned home, having caregivers take over his other chores shopping and cooking and cleaning was also very stressful and I am sure contributed to his current state of dementia. They both seem to be at pretty much a steady state right now, although I don't really know what the 14 hour having someone looking over your shoulder every second caregiving experience is going to result in. I personally couldn't stand that kind of attention!

Point of fact, this is not true: "And there really aren't "treatable" dementias"...

Here is a list from the Alzheimer Society of Canada:

Common causes of reversible dementias:

Depression
Medication (side effects, drug interactions, drug overdose
Alcohol abuse
Drug abuse
Dietary, vitamin and mineral deficiencies (A, C, B-12 and folate)
Traumas (due to falls, concussions or contusions to the head)
Hormonal dysfunction (thyroid problems)
Metabolic disorders (dehydration, kidney failure, COPD)
Infections
Heart disease
Brain disease (tumours)
Environmental toxins

Please see your doctor if you are concerned about memory loss or any other symptoms of these conditions.

DD, does your dad have a GPS device or a tracking device for you? to know where he is? my mom fell and broke her hip as well, but 4 mos.? I went and stayed with her for 6 wks. but I don't really understand; I mean, I can understand him not wanting to have 24 hr. help in the house but if not doing so meant her not being there - and he was there by himself? I'm surprised he wouldn't then consent; actually I'm somewhat surprised your mom consent to stay with you without him; not sure my mom would have; I'm trying to think if she ever did, when she did come stay with me later, pretty sure he always came and when he'd want to go home, pretty sure she'd insist on going to, of course not entirely sure he was driving the trip himself, think I was, she sure wasn't; they'd never been separated much, either, in their 62 yrs. and while we were dealing with her dad had lost his specialist for his condition and with his PA handling his case, she was monitoring him much more closely than his doc ever had so called with some very specific instructions regarding his meds that he couldn't deal with himself so I had to take care of that as well as mom on top of her having just gotten out of the hospital with the hip and him staying with her as well there with him unknowingly, we think, anyway, don't think he deliberately intended to put her away, signing papers for her to be placed, we think, possibly from the stress of going through that with her especially since we'd already been dealing with an eye issue with her, leading to him falling at the pharmacy/grocery store and messing his head all up, bleeding all over, while they were already down here being evacuees from an ice storm where they'd ended up going to a shelter because he wouldn't go anywhere else so was practically forced to leave home where they had no power and/or heat, and we couldn't get to them or even contact them, all after mom having just been told they couldn't do anything for her eye there, but having just found out they could here so had been able to get her into the eye doc while they were here but it had all been very stressful for dad and it only got worse from there with him being willing to do surgery and mom insisting on it, while I think dad would have been at that point to have everything stopped, but it wasn't his sight, but hers, although turned out, but that's a whole other issue, but then again, might be something maybe to think about - I just did - how's your dad's sight?

DD you said "I am really disappointed that so many can't get that there is a difference between a person who has always walked and can't reliably find their way home, and someone who wanders because they have Alzheimers disease."

Could you explain what that difference is? For example, how would a police officer decide which is which and get APS involved?

I take it that when APS met up with your dad, he was exhibiting some of his moderate cognitive loss due to aging (dementia). If he had seemed perfectly normal they would have had no reason to bring him home, right? If someone reported me "wandering" around my neighborhood and the police or APS came, they wouldn't think that was dangerous just because I'm an old lady, would they? So what made them think your dad shouldn't be out alone?

It is not against the law for elderly people to be out walking on their own. The problem only arises when they appear to be a danger to themselves. Why did the people who responded to the report of your dad think he might be at risk?

I didn't think they "just met up with him", thought they "came to the door", which, though, now makes me wonder how did they know which door to come to, if the neighbor didn't know, and if they did, then why did they call? the police got involved with my dad when he was coming home from having driven himself to church for the evening service, got to his road to turn in - a left turn - and mistook the street light for the headlights of an oncoming car; which, thankfully, he at least didn't turn in front of, like his neighbor up the road did - but instead just would never turn, backing traffic up, not sure exactly what happened but seemingly he finally decided to go on up to the next road - past the car? and then turned, then turned again - his road was a cut-through road, just like that what, so he could come in from the other way, but then he seemingly didn't, went on down to the main road, made a left turn, and then either apparently a right one or possibly pulled off before, not sure if police were behind or possibly had been for some time, possibly why didn't make his turn, though, thinking nowhere to actually pull off, but then thought about the church with its big parking lot, but his met early but their may not have so may have still been full, so not sure exactly, but thinking probably trying to find somewhere to pull off, but believe wound up at his bank with police then pulling in behind him, with him then telling him his version of what was going on and I believe them telling him what had really been going on and telling him to "just"? not drive out at night anymore, so he quit going to evening service; believe they still ran two police to a car so one of them, I think, drove him home, not just they followed him, with the other one following, but they didn't call anybody else at that point, even under those circumstances, so would you say he was exhibiting "moderate cognitive loss due to aging?" they drove him home; I believe somebody in that line had called them, because believe they knew the situation, don't think they just happened to have come behind him, because don't think they knew where he lived and that he didn't turn on his road like - what - they thought he should have? he couldn't go to town? of course maybe they might wonder where he'd been coming from out of town, which - though would they know - he normally had no reason to be? though there was a restaurant down that way he used to go to - or could it have been him pulling into the bank on a Sunday night? or course, there was an ATM there, not that he had an ATM card, but they wouldn't know that, would they? of course did he pull up to it, or just pull in the parking lot? no, I think they were called, like, in this case, though, they weren't just called - they were called and reported for "wandering", now, what made them think he was "wandering" and not just "walking" - we had a similar situation in our town with an "elderly"; I put it in quotes, because scary, he wasn't much older than me, if as old, but he wasn't from here; he'd just come from India to help his son and dil with taking care of his grandson while they worked, but...now this is the part I'm somewhat confused about because apparently assuming they hadn't gone back to work yet, or at least I hope not, because I hope he wasn't leaving the child home by himself and I don't think he was since nothing said about it but he was out walking the neighborhood and was reported, but said he was going up to people's garages and looking in, which I could understand; however, there was some question about that, so what exactly was the situation here? was there more to it than what was said? like in this case, the neighborhood, in spite of that one couple living there, was definitely not a mixed-race place - sorry

like in this situation, was he doing anything actually illegal? was he even a danger to himself, or is that even what their concern was, or were they, or at least saying they felt he was a threat to them? is it possible the police were just trying to protect themselves, like turned out to be the big issue in this local case?

Dementia diagnosis comes with more than memory loss and not finding your way home. As it progresses they get fears, or hallucinations, invasive thoughts, aggression etc. that comes out of nowhere with no warning.
One day to the next you never know what disconnect will occur. I
After dad walked off the curb in a split second, into oncoming traffic, I realized his dementia has progressed. He has no fear.
So, four years ago when he first came to live with us, I trusted him enough to leave the room to throw a load in the wash or use the restroom as I did when my child was five years old. Now, no way! He is as unpredictable as a one year old first learning to walk. He is never left unattended. I would not let my children walk the neighborhood alone. Safety is the issue here.
Remember, once a man, twice a child.