My elderly mother recently moved from her home from another state and now lives in an assisted living facility close to me (I have POA). My teenage daughter works at her facility and has been following COVID protocol standards put in place by this facility. The facility has been testing for COVID regularly - they did have several positive cases (cause for concern), but as of today they are COVID free. Recently my mom and daughter received both doses of the COVID vaccine. Before my mom received the vaccine, she wasn't sure if she wanted to get it. I had told her that since she's still able to make decisions of her own, she needed to decide. She got the vaccine and seems to be fine (no adverse side-effects for either her or my daughter).
My sister (not from this state) was wanting to pay all of us a visit within the coming month). My husband (who takes the virus very seriously and has been tested twice to protect himself and our family) would like my sister and her husband to get tested before they come. I had mentioned the possibility to my sister and she was furious and stated "we won't come" if they have to get tested. This breaks my heart. (In the past she hung the phone up on me when I told her I was taking my kids to get their flu shot!).
I'm trying to be diplomatic, but I feel like I'm literally stuck in the middle of an ugly battle that won't end well for either case. I have been trying to err on the side of caution and follow proper protocol when it comes to my mom and family's health. Has anyone else experienced this situation? I'm worried that if we stick to our guns and tell them to please get a test, they won't come. Maybe they won't have an opportunity to see my mom again and will make us feel like it's our fault. On the other hand, if they feel like this virus has been a farce from the beginning (and they aren't taking it seriously), they could spread it to the rest of my family who has not been vaccinated yet. Every time I converse with her she seems angry with the world and they way things are and blames it all on politics. I'm ready to have a breakdown... it's getting to be too much. Any advice is appreciated!
If she wants to come to your state w/o being tested & w/o getting the 'vaccine', then she can do so, it's not a mandate to be tested or to get the shots. The AL has it's own rules with regard to visits, however, and she will be FORCED to abide by those rules if she wants to visit her mother. She may have to do a window visit, which is what we have to STILL do in order to visit my mother who lives in a Memory Care AL. And yes, she's had the vaccines, but they're still insisting on window visits for now.
Your sister is free to take the virus seriously or dismiss it entirely, that's her prerogative. And it's entirely YOUR prerogative how you choose to live life in YOUR home and who you wish to invite to stay with you inside of your home. When my sister wanted to come visit us several months ago, I said No. Period. She wanted to drive out from NYC with her b/f and my DH was recuperating from open heart surgery & then lung surgery, and I felt like I DID NOT want her and the b/f to be staying at my house, nor did I want them visiting us after staying in a hotel. My house, my rules. Same with my DH's children who were insisting on coming here for a visit in November & December. No. Simple and direct is the best approach.
Your sister can be as angry & belligerent as she'd like; it's her choice.
Good luck!
This is on the facility, not you.