My father is in a VA facility and while he isn't competent, they say he is. He can't walk, can't care for self as for showers, meals, and is a drunk. He has mold in his home which the facility is aware of and has told me they can't release him to his home. I say, "Great"! But they say he wishes to leave and they can't legally hold him. They tell me he wants assisted living and I have explained to them that assisted living to him means he goes home and people come assist him. But this social worker acts as if I have to do something and tells me they have people come and audit the facility and they ask residents questions. That when my father tells them he wants to go home, the facility will have to prove they are in the process of doing his request. I don't know, but all sounds like hogwash to me. They act like I should be going to the courts to prove he isn't competent, when even they say he IS competent. He might be competent, but for sure he is crazy. Anyone here know about these "audits"? And am I obligated to pick him up being I am his child as well as DPOA?
No, you are not obligated to pick him up not even as a POA. I agree, get your POA revoked by a lawyer. Send the information to the VA saying that you are no longer have responsibility to handle Dads finances or care. The State will now have to step in and take over his care. At that time, you will relinquish all financial information to State appointed guardian who will take over his care.
Once you have done that, block the VA's number. If u happen to get a call just say "Sorry, I will no longer be responsible for Mr. Jones" hang up and block the call. Mail, return. The only person you will need to be in touch with is the State guardian and just to hand over info. Once that is done, you are free.
"No good deed goes unpunished" This is so true. In hindsight you now realize you should never have gotten involved. So now you have to walk away from a situation you can never do anything about because the person is not cooperating. He may be ur father by blood but he has never been your father. The uncle was wrong in contacting you. An abandoned child owes nothing to that parent. My daughter just found out from an Ancestry DNA test that she has a first cousin from my biological father's side. The Dad who raised and adopted me from 2 has been gone 15 yrs. Mom was my Mother. I think it might be neat finding how many half siblings I might have. Do I want to meet them, not particularly. You never know what you will open up.
I have no idea about the audits the SW speaks of but it sounds like it would be wise for you to resign your POA and allow the facility to file for guardianship.
Let them take over; they will be able to get the courts to declare him incompetent.