Earlier this year my 84yo father was overdosed and almost died from lithium toxicity. When it came time for him to return home, I was advised by the case worker he would need an attendant/caregiver 24/7. I was lead to believe if this care were not provided, dad could be placed in a home involuntarily. Finances are tight, so we made an arrangement with a friend of a friend. B would reside in the home, make sure Dad took his meds, & ate regularly. B would also drive dad to appts and grocery shopping. All he wanted was room and board, $100 per week, and the freedom to work "odd jobs" if the opportunity came up and didn't interfere with Dad's care.
The first few weeks were heaven sent. Then B began to take over as if he owned the home. He was spoken too and agreed he was out of line. We had a few good days then the assertive behavior started back. Dad was doing his own driving, cooking for B, doing B's laundry and running a phone message service. After 3 months, Dad gave B 2 weeks notice and asked him to leave. That was 5 weeks ago. B is still there. He is verbally abusive and has now brought his girlfriend in. The house is now up for sale and B is sabotaging the process any way he can. Dad's health is deteriorating rapidly. Last night was particularly bad and dad called the police. B and girlfriend were left at the house while dad was escorted away by the police. The police say B is a "tenant" so mwe have to go thru the eviction process to get rid of him. I am astounded that the law is skewed in D's favor. I filed a complaint of elder abuse with APS today- that will take 10 days to investigate. I have dozens of notes this man has written calling dad a pr*ck, mother eff sob etc. I have witnesses to verbal name calling. He was also given a 3 day notice that his services were no longer required and that he needed to vacate. If he doesn't go along, we are facing an uphill court battle to get this scum out of my father's house.
Anyone else ever gone thru something like this? Any legal beagles with advice. I am making myself sick over this.
It's been suggested we notify the utility companies we are going on vacation and have services suspended.
I think the police are wrong about considering B a tenant, and the responding officers were way off-base. B is not paying to live there. He was EMPLOYED as a "live-in caregiver". Once you have fired him, he must move out and should not require eviction proceedings. In my opinion, he is now a "squatter", illegally ocupying your fathers premises. The cops should just put him out - period. He is also abusing your father, abusing your home, and his position as well - of which you have plenty of proof. I would go back to them and insist they revisit the situation. I would insist on speaking to a detective, and file a formal complaint. They will be obligated to investigate and may find "dirt" on him you were not even aware of. He might have a record as a scam artist that preys on the elderly. Let them know you have also filed a complaint with APS - they will probably collaborate with eachother.
Your father being forced out of his own home in desperation and having to pay for a hotel room, while the abuser and his girlfriend remain in a house they do not own, is utterly ridiculous and totally unacceptable. I would not put up with it for another minute. I think you need to start yelling a little louder, and also get an attorney ASAP. It would be money well spent to restore your fathers rights.
Dad moved to a motel today- after emptying refrigerator and cupboards of all food goods. We are looking into an attorney. I'm afraid this could get costly, but Dad's health and mental well being have to come first.
I hope you can get him out of your dad's house soon. And I would avoid any other friends of this friend! I wish someone else would make him a job offer that made it attractive for him to move fast. That would be great. You know anyone that needs an employee?