I know this should probably be an easy answer, but there's a few ways this could go especially COVID going on.
I've written in here before but it's been quite a while. I hope everyone is doing well. I've been one of the caregivers for both my grandparents for a few years along with my mom since we're both in the same city and it's been a lot. My grandfather died last week, almost 2 years to the day that he started falling ill and we placed him in a facility.
We're planning the funeral which can't happen until next week. There's a public visitation which will have a limit (it actually was just modified to allow us more people), social distancing, masks, etc. The next day there will be the graveside service and I believe a brief small service at the funeral home beforehand.
There's also an option for a live stream and I've been told that this may be the best option for my grandmother to watch at home with someone with her of course. I totally understand this, but I also feel like she should see him and say goodbye, especially since she hasn't been able to see him in a very long time. Also, while she did get a little emotional when we broke the news, I'm not sure how she will be if she sees him in person and I also worry it may be too much for her. So I'm torn on what would be the best option.
What would you do?
outside graveside; with masks and social distancing; also ask people o forego giving their sympathies.
Although we put a notice with the obituary that all attendees HAD to wear a mask due to mom being 96 years old, you have the usual non-masker behavior to challenge that request. Other siblings showed the non-maskers to an area outside the viewing/visitation room and handed them a mask - again, telling them mom is 96 and her (and caregivers) could not afford to catch the virus.
We handled the service the same way. Many chapels for service have an area specifically for the family. Ours didn't, so we reserved several rows up front with several rows of blank seating behind us. Prior to service, casket was open for public viewing. Masking for public was mandatory with a noted of explanation posted by the visitor's sign in book and on the entrance door. Family member ensured that rule was enforced. A few people opted to wait outside instead of putting on a mask.
At starting time, the casket closed to get everyone in their seat. AFTER everyone seated, family went to the front row seats - so no contact prior to service. After service, the casket was not opened again. All guests were routed out of the room away from the family, again, to avoid customary stopping to hug, hold hands, or close contact. All this worked out quite well for the family.
If discussed and thought out well in the planning meeting, your grandmother should be able to attend without contact by the public. You just have to make sure people watching the doors are able to confront people kindly and offer the mask or no entry option.