Just a quick question, I will post all the other details when I get a free moment. But I have to ask this one now... Social worker finally got back to me this morning. Dad qualifies for a few small things which may help, does not qualify for a number of others (too much social security $) but that's not the main thing here. While she visited, she noticed that my house needs a lot of repairs. When she got Dad a glass from the dishwasher, the dishwasher fell out of it's housing (again) - the countertop it attaches to is rotten underneath. I explained to her that most of my disposable income goes to provide Dad with transportation to all his appointments, extra heat and electricity, adult diapers, bed linen, you name it... whatever he doesn't pay for, I do. Well, long story short - she wants permission to call my siblings to find out why they aren't helping to support Dad? She understands that my older brother hasn't got the resources, but she said that people in my brother's income bracket have no excuse. She claims that often a call from someone like her will make them realize they need to step up... she said it would not be unreasonable for him to provide Dad with $1000-$1500 a WEEK (!). I am still ROTFL... I told her that if she got him to provide $100 -$150 A YEAR, she deserves an award. She acted like she didn't believe me. Anyway, I am tempted to let her try. I mean, at least my brother would understand that it really is serious... but I still think it is a waste of time. Any thoughts? Do you see any possible downside? I mean, beside my brother dying of laughter?
1. Expenses incurred to care for a close relative are tax-deductible.
2. Check your state's financial fiduciary laws. In my state, PA, children have a financial obligation to provide for parents who have few resources.
3. Was your Dad a veteran during wartime? He may be eligible for Aid and Attendance from the Govt.
Good luck!
And, as caregivers, our toes can be stepped on, and sometimes, others can be control freaks and think that they can suck blood from a stone.
But in the case of your dad and in the cases of any of our parents, we might/might already be doing some traditional social worker duties - such as taking the perspective of what's best for our loved one...security-wise and basic-need wise.
We might know what's best to keep him or her secure, fed, medically-sound, clean, etc., but I personally think a second opinion wouldn't hurt, and making your brother aware is needed.
If your brother reacts negatively to this news, that's on him.
The risk is that your brother doesn't even know that his help is needed.
You never know what the outcome of that will be (I wouldn't necessarily keep hope alive to receive a ridiculously high weekly amount of $1,500), but it's a first step. At least he would know.