Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
My mother died at 95 with advanced dementia and still remembered us. It's a fallacy to think all elders will eventually forget their loved ones. It's Alzheimer's that brings about this issue oftentimes, not so much the other dementias.
My mother went from regular AL into Memory Care when she had moderate dementia and bad mobility problems, was wheelchair bound and falling constantly. So the combination of those deficits meant she needed a lot more care than what was offered in AL, and MC was required. I could have looked around for other ALs to take her, and maybe I should have, but that ship has sailed. She was staying in the same facility with a lot of the same staff who loved her, and she'd have her own private suite. Had she needed to share a room, I would've looked elsewhere. She was not one to share and truly disliked women.
Have you thought about looking elsewhere for mom to be accepted in AL?
If that's not feasible, do your best to make her side of the room as homey and familiar as possible. What else can you Do? My mother was SUCH a complainer that I could've put her up at Buckingham palace and she'd have come up with issues. If that's how your mom is, there's nothing you can do to fix this situation, so don't try. Just bring her snacks and small gifts and restaurant food when the complaining starts about the "horrible food" bc it WILL. It's the law 🙄
Keep visits brief if necessary, and don't try to intervene with everything she says upsets her. Only the important things. Like if the roommate is screaming 24/7 or things like that.
Wishing you good luck and Godspeed, and that mom adjusts well to the new situation.
It likely will not. But you can't be responsible for her happiness. Moreover there IS NO HAPPINESS in all this and there will not be. Old age is all about loss. And this is the final loss. The loss of your home, your own decisions and your mind.
So you will have to let go of expecting things to go well, accept that things are NOT well, and go on best you can. They may ask you not to visit a while, and not to take her out too frequently. I would try it their way. Families often end up with a meld of what they do and what they are advised to do.
Take it a day at a time. Expect the unexpected. There sometimes is more quick decline either temporarily or permanently. I am so sorry. Again, you can't be responsible for happiness now. It isn't there to be had.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My mother went from regular AL into Memory Care when she had moderate dementia and bad mobility problems, was wheelchair bound and falling constantly. So the combination of those deficits meant she needed a lot more care than what was offered in AL, and MC was required. I could have looked around for other ALs to take her, and maybe I should have, but that ship has sailed. She was staying in the same facility with a lot of the same staff who loved her, and she'd have her own private suite. Had she needed to share a room, I would've looked elsewhere. She was not one to share and truly disliked women.
Have you thought about looking elsewhere for mom to be accepted in AL?
If that's not feasible, do your best to make her side of the room as homey and familiar as possible. What else can you Do? My mother was SUCH a complainer that I could've put her up at Buckingham palace and she'd have come up with issues. If that's how your mom is, there's nothing you can do to fix this situation, so don't try. Just bring her snacks and small gifts and restaurant food when the complaining starts about the "horrible food" bc it WILL. It's the law 🙄
Keep visits brief if necessary, and don't try to intervene with everything she says upsets her. Only the important things. Like if the roommate is screaming 24/7 or things like that.
Wishing you good luck and Godspeed, and that mom adjusts well to the new situation.
But you can't be responsible for her happiness. Moreover there IS NO HAPPINESS in all this and there will not be. Old age is all about loss. And this is the final loss. The loss of your home, your own decisions and your mind.
So you will have to let go of expecting things to go well, accept that things are NOT well, and go on best you can. They may ask you not to visit a while, and not to take her out too frequently. I would try it their way. Families often end up with a meld of what they do and what they are advised to do.
Take it a day at a time. Expect the unexpected. There sometimes is more quick decline either temporarily or permanently. I am so sorry. Again, you can't be responsible for happiness now. It isn't there to be had.