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I'm a home healthcare worker, and I absolutely love my client. However recently she has had someone she knew in highschool come back into her life, and he is not a good person. Textbook narcissist and womanizer. Is constantly making her feel bad about herself, he consistency nice to you and breaks his promises to her mother who also lives with her. Her dog doesn't like him (even tried to bite him in the face), and vise versa. And has progressively attempted to get me fired for my job by lying and making claims of theft and I don't know all kinds of BS along with leaving me hateful and nasty little notes, along with the message he leaves behind all over the porch and her house for me to clean the next day. She's recovering alcoholic and yet he consistently and daily brings at least a 12 pack of beer to drink at her house he is started leaving drug paraphernalia laying around her home. I'm fairly certain that he is stalking her and has told her such things as he can see her anytime because he has hidden cameras in her home. I'm almost positive that he has put his hands on her physically she is even called the police on him at one point to try to keep him from coming back and told him not to come back again repeatedly yet he does usually late at night when she's by herself and can weasel his way in. Since this man has came into her life she has declined medically significantly she has been in and out of the hospital and her nerves are fried she told me just yesterday several times that she thought she was dying. This morning I woke up for work to a message saying that she just can't do this anymore she is a nervous wreck she's so very sick and that she was just going to do without a worker. Basically trying to fire me. And since my employment is patient directed, she's the boss! I don't want to lose my job, but more importantly than that I want her and her mother to be safe and free of his games and BS. What should I or what can I do to get him out of their lives?

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I guess APS is. My next step. Thank you ladies.
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AlvaDeer Dec 11, 2024
Hope you will update us. You can report as a senior at risk and just say you aren't involved anymore because you were fired, but that you are very concerned for her with no one to watch over her and are afraid she is being used and manipulated and controlled.

You won't be filled in, but it will get checked into.
If she is competent there is very little APS or anyone else will be able to do.
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I am assuming this woman is NOT mentally incompetent and that she is not having managed care through an agency or through a care-giving governmental agency???

I do not know what kind of care you were hired to do?
I do not know WHO hired you?
I do not know what this woman's physical needs are?
I do not know what her mental stability and competency is?
I do not know if this woman has a POA?

If this woman is competent under the law then she has a right to fire you if she hired you.
I can't know what she means by "she cannot do THIS anymore?"
Cannot do WHAT?
Does she feel torn between your advice and his?

If you are hired by an agency of any type as her caregiver then you are a mandated reporter as a health care worker.
But if you are just a "friend" she hired who is advising her about her love life, you may be endangering both yourself and her.

I would leave this job. Be certain she has the phone number for APS (Adult Protective Services) and 911 and the police.
If she is incompetent in her own decisions as adjudged under the law, then you must report her to APS for wellness check.

You may wish to do so in any case. This then puts this troubled woman into the hands of an agency that can take responsibility.

In all truth, you may literally be risking HER LIFE and YOUR OWN LIFE if you continue contact.
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Sekhomehelper Dec 11, 2024
Thankyou. She is mentally competent for now, but a progressing illness that's called confusion and like type of symptoms quite frankly hence why she gets help from home helper or is qualified for one. More than anything she's just sick and tired and too tired to fight back on any level... thank you for the advice.
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You call APS and report to them exactly what you've told us, and that they need to talk to this woman when this man IS NOT around or she won't be honest because she'll be afraid.
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