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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
The lesson here as always is never make promises that you may not be able to keep. As an adult child you have absolutely no rights in this situation unless there is abuse concerned when you can involve the appropriate authorities. Providing support for the primary caregiver in this case a spouse is the only option.
Support the caregiver. Offer to do specific tasks like food shopping, lawn mowing, call in healthy take out meals. Visit with your parent so that she can take a break, take a walk, get some exercise or read a book.
Nobody should ever promise something as ridiculous as never using a nursing home. It sounds good at the moment, but life may have other plans. Hard decisions come with age and infirmity. No choices should be taken out because of a pressured statement in the past. It may very well be the best option at some point.
My mother was a good person. She died years ago on a Thanksgiving. Except for that day that she died, Thanksgiving has never been sad for me. That is a day I give special thanks for what a good person she was and remember how happy we were with her. There's an old song, a theme song from a really old radio show, I think, that was part of the music she wanted at her funeral. It's called Brighten the Corner Where You Are. That's a wonderful philosophy and guidance for how to live our lives. Just brighten the corner where you are.
Hi, Aldervalaam. I agree with previous responses. If your family member needs more professional care and the spouse is unable to continue care, that should be a comfort to you. My mom made and kept that promise to my dad. When he died, she was on the verge of a nervous and physical breakdown. My father needed to be somewhere with more professional care, and I know it must have broken his heart to see the condition that she was in. I feared that she might die before he did. So, take comfort that the family member is getting more professional help and that the spouse realizes that. It is a very difficult situation, but sometimes the health and ability of the spouse/caretaker to keep the promise have to be considered. I learned that with the worry about my mother. I hope these postings bring you comfort about the decision. PS. Vegaslady you had a compassionate mother who obviously loved her family.
Actually my mom did want to die in a hospital. She thought dying at home would be hard on the family and bring sad memories into the home when it should be remembered in a happier way. She got her wish.
I agree that you should respect the spouses decision. I am sure it was not an easy decision and they will need your support now more than ever. I kept my dad with dementia at home as long as I could but knew when the time came to place him in a NH it was the right decision. He got excellent care.
Nothing. It's not your call. Support the care giver's wishes. By your doing that, you will make the transition to professional care easier on your loved one.
Remember, NOBODY says I want to die in a hospital. Or I want to die in a hospice center. These feelings are very natural. Yet, for the sake of your loved one? In many, if not most, cases? A professional setting is more appropriate and easier on your loved one.
Do they have a health care proxy_POA.. Even if they were promised to be able to stay home, often the care is too much for the caregiver.. Most HCP state that the POA can make the decision to put the patient in a NH..
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
As an adult child you have absolutely no rights in this situation unless there is abuse concerned when you can involve the appropriate authorities.
Providing support for the primary caregiver in this case a spouse is the only option.
Remember, NOBODY says I want to die in a hospital. Or I want to die in a hospice center. These feelings are very natural. Yet, for the sake of your loved one? In many, if not most, cases? A professional setting is more appropriate and easier on your loved one.