In the final years of my mother's life she was abandoned by my siblings and I became her caregiver. She decided in the end the most fair thing to do would be to leave me the bulk of her estate which probably is a 400,000 dollars. My sibings had lived with her for years and been granted 100s of thousands of dollars over the course of a few decades and then abandoned her when she needed their help. I stepped in to make sure she received the care she needed and she left everything to me. My siblings are trying to litigate and grab as much cash as they can and I just want to put his behind me. She was aware of the mess she was leaving behind and left it to me to decide how to handle it. I am torn between acquiescing to their demands and doing what mom really wanted. They have smeared me to friends and family and have made me out to be bad guy. The stress is killing me and I just want to move on but I am conflicted about carrying out her wishes. Please offer some guidance.
If there is a will, you have to follow it. If she left it all to you, it's yours to do with as you want. However, if it was me, I would do the research and make a list of amts mom gave to them and then divide the inheritiance to give everyone equal shares with a copy of how pay out was determined. If any friends or family contacted you about not being fair to siblings - then I would also add in the payout sheet to be sure to notify so-and-so to update them on the pay out since it was so important to tell them when they thought they were being cheated.
Carrying out her wishes is one thing. Do it. Then do the right thing if you get it all by sharing as evenly as you can. You'll sleep better at night.
My mother left everything to my daughter instead of the family bc she called at some particular time when no one else did.
That was meant to alienate my daughter rather then reward.
My mother gives out constant report cards via the trust depending how much we pay attention to her and take over the top orders. It’s very manipulative and no one participates anymore.
But if I leave my money to one child out of 3, what I want is what I want. It should not be questioned.
They then tell the parent lies and get them to change their will/trust to favor them.
Not everything is in black & white! Until charges are brought against these types of people it will continue.
There are many cases about this not only in the US but across the globe.
The will is binding so if anyone contests it they won't get anywhere this is what our lawyer told us.
I would get yourself a lawyer because you will have a fight on your hands and the lawyer may help you with any of the mud slinging comments of your siblings.
What children need to realize is that parents are not obligated to leave anything to them. With me, my nephew has my brother as his beneficiary on a Trust because he raised him for 11 yrs. But, I am the one who helped him with SSD, Medicaid and getting him government aide for his apartment. Also, getting my sister's annuity payment re-instated based on his disability. And I now oversee his finances and will need to do this till one of us passes. But having my brother as beneficiary made my nephew feel he was paying my brother back. His wish and I abided by that.
The only way I see anyone has the right to contest is if they thing the one caring or the POA as taken advantage financially and should not be getting a full cut. The worst that could happen is the Judge says you need to split the 400k. Do it and then walk away from these greedy people.
The limited information in the other post isn't helpful, but the title is contradictory:
"my siblings have started a civil suit and blocked probate of the will"
To the best of my knowledge, plaintiffs (your siblings) do not have the authority to "block" a will. They can REQUEST it, and it would part of the "prayer" in the suit, for redress of alleged grievances, only a court can issue an order to "block" action, unless plaintiffs have been given more statutory or other power of which I'm unaware.
Gzanch, as to your opening post on this thread, how a court treats plaintiffs and their requests varies by the actual Complaint, the alleged grievances, the prayer, the attorney representing them, the plaintiffs, and the judge.
No one can predict how a court will view their requests; there are too many variables. But documentation backing up their complaints is important. And it seems as though there is a lack of documentation, but abundance of accusations.
I'm guessing that they feel that your mother acted inappropriately in leaving her estate to you, despite their involvement earlier. That's a decision made by your mother, not you, and regardless of their feelings, they can challenge legally, spend a lot of money, and still get nothing.
Notwithstanding that, your siblings are not treating you kindly, and I doubt that that's going to change. I think your focus should be (a) find a good attorney with a strong background in CONTESTED probate court proceedings, and (b) recognize that the relationship with your siblings has deteriorated and probably isn't going to be changed, as it seems as though they're quite aggressive in pursuing their own interests.
There is no way to control what others are saying or doing; it's up to you to find a way to move forward, w/o them. It's so unfortunate that relationships come to this sad level, but when they do, and it's obvious that they're not going to change, you need to look out for yourself and your own sanity, protect yourself by finding a good defense attorney, and recognize that the relationships have deteriorated beyond repair.
You do have the option of giving them something for their earlier support. If their more rational treatment and prior support are important to you, that's something to consider, as once you inherit the funds, they are yours to keep, invest, spend or distribute (barring other limitations in the Will).
Perhaps a solution through the litigation is for the court to mandate a detailed accounting of the funds already provided to the siblings, assess that vs. your inheritance, and determine if it would be appropriate, or a kind offering by you, to share a portion of your inheritance.
I wish I could offer more positive insight, but from your description, it doesn't seem the situation will change for the better.
There are times when it's better to be poorer than richer.
More info please.
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/my-siblings-have-started-a-civil-suit-and-blocked-probate-of-the-will-470692.htm?orderby=recent
Which question are you really asking: whether the court will take their case "seriously" (it will if there's no will or there is and they have any proof of wrong-doing) or whether you should go to court at all? Are they just contesting the will or are they accusing you of manipulating your mother? More info would be very helpful. So sorry for this distressing situation.