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I had a friend once,
but the rope broke
and he got away.
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😉 I don’t walk away from fights,
I prefer running.
(2)
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I don't need an inspirational quote. I need chocolate.
(4)
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Wanted:
Chocolate with the nutritional value of kale, but that does not contain any traces of kale. Your move, science.
(3)
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I don't want to look back one day and think, "I could have eaten that."
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I need chocolate because
Monday.
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Bundle,
Good to see you back in good form!
I am going to bump you right up to the top.
You are much needed at present!
Welcome home.
(3)
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😇😇
My New Year’s Resolutions:
1. Gain weight
2. Save less money
3. Set realistic goals
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😉 January has been a tough year, but we made it.
(1)
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🦦🦦🦦
Be kind to otters.
(4)
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😡😡😡
Not fast
Just furious.
(5)
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😇😇😇
I’m going to let God fix it
because if I fix it
I’m going to jail.
(10)
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⭐️🌸⭐️🌸⭐️
Sometimes it takes me all day…
to get nothing done.
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🙂Go away.
Unless you have chocolate.
And in that case, hello.
(4)
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⭐️🌸⭐️🌸⭐️
Chocolate is my favorite
food group.
(2)
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This is worrisome humor.

As the moon rises, one notices a bright light that does not move.

One asks if that is a drone.

Another says it's a comet, but comets don't stay still.

After one is told, it is a planet, one responds that one does not keep up with plants.
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What is a New Year’s Resolution?

Something that goes in one year and out the other.
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Last year, I was able to keep all my New Year’s Resolutions…

tucked away in a journal on my bookshelf.
(3)
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What’s a spider’s New Year’s Resolution?

To spend less time on the web.
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Santa, the guy who works one day a year and spends the rest of the year judging you….
(1)
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I just ran across this old joke and I smiled despite myself so I'll share

I know someone with a terrible fear of giants....
Feefiphobia
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Santa is home and in bed now, so are all the reindeer. 🎅🤶🦌🦌🦌🦌🦌🦌🦌🦌💤💤
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Cwillie,
Santa leaving Ottawa, Ontario, Canada and heading to Albany, N.Y.
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Merry Christmas Anxietynacy and Margaret!
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Over 3.8 billion gifts already delivered.
Last seen over Norway, just after Copenhagen, Denmark.
Sleigh is a bit overloaded with coal this year.

Headed towards your house!
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Not sure that this was intended to be a joke, but our local international on-line news this Christmas morning has a headline “Mary Magdelen found in Sistine Chapel”. Perhaps Michaelangelo dug her up? Anyway, it made me laugh!

Happy Christmas to everyone, love from Margaret
(1)
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Santa's reindeer were cleared by the vet to fly the sled tonight.

Go, Rudolph
Dasher
Dancer
Prancer
Vixen
Comet
Cupid
Donner
Blitzen

Norad tracker has them over Dubrovnik, Croatia just now.
(1)
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Inmyshoes,

Perfect! ROTFLMAO
(1)
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Christmas Hint

Wrap empty boxes and put them under the tree. Everytime your child acts up throw one of them in the fireplace
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Therapist, taking notes.
Santa lying on a sofa:
"When I was a kid, my parents told me I didn't exist."
(2)
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