Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Who say's elderly won't complain of pain. You should meet my mother. Juju, so sorry about your friend. Sounds like she had a good life, and didn't have to linger with a long illness. Cat, let us know how the biopsy comes out, hoping for the best here. Hope everyone has a good weekend.
Juju: So sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. Sounds like she had a really active and meaningful life up to the end. Hard to pick a way to go, but maybe she was blessed. Still, I am so sorry. It's hard to take it all in sometimes. So overwhelming when you are hanging on by a thread. Breath, Juju, deep breaths.
OK, my time to VENT about me. Had the biopsy today. The doc said the worst part with the lanocaine (sp) injections as they give a burning sensation. He was right about that, it does burn, but it's manageable. He downplayed the sensation of having tissue removed from inside your breast. That hurt and I am no sissy.
I should have the lab results by Wednesday at the latest.
A million things I want to say to all of you, but I need to go back to so many posts. Mame: Hang in there and know we are all praying for you and your mom.
Juju: May I just offer this for what it is worth. Your cat has had a long life and just the mouth issues he suffers are very painful. If you can find a way to give him peace, that is probably the best thing to do. He depends on you to make the right decisions. Sorry for the pain you both experience. Such a difficult situation, but one that has to be dealt with.
Diane: Glad to hear from you. You just keep putting one foot in front of the other. We all have such respect for all you have done.
Hey Bobbie: Didn't get the ludes joke, but that's ok. Hope all is well with you and you will soon have tv channels. Try to avoid the news.
Speaking of the news, we went to the imaging center today and the television was on in the waiting room. Geez, it looked like Armageddon; fires here, floods there. What a flipping mess.
Hey, this sounds like a Republican conspiracy to me. Rape, pillage and plunder and all the while fiddle while Rome burns. Assholes.
Terrible news today, I waited and worried all morning for mom's Sr. Companion. She was supposed to be here at 9am. I called her and the dining site and waited n worried more, just knew something was wrong! Well her daughter came up at 1:30pm. My sweet Wanda had fallen, hit her head, and passed on yesterday eve. Her daughter found her after she did not answer telephone. We have lost a wonderful human being, my heart goes out to her daughter and family. They lived next to each other and were like glue!
RIP Wanda and prayers n blessings to Linda and the entire family! She was like a mom to me, we had become close over the last year (3ys working)! 86 years old 4foot 8 full of spunk! always wore a button saying "shit happens". had 6-8 clients she juggled, loved to stay busy! A strong sweet woman and friend!! Wanda will be sorely missed!
Well nurse said mom is in great shape, we will see what doc has to say Monday! I made ma a huge pot of spaghetti sauce last nite, too. It is one of her fav's. Puree'd the gr beef n some spinach, zucchini, n carrots into it. It was pretty good even it was a thick paste of sauce! Pcheese fixes all !!!
Hey Zoom, I remember you. Can't take 'Ludes and sit in the front row.....
(70's line)
Going up the dock and then back here to check in here and on Boni's thread, the 5:00 on Friday. Good crowd and the jokes are funny.
Made spagetti on the boat and going to take it up for dinner. What a change in my life to finally have a place to go.
There is life after caregiving and I am living proof. It took about 3 years for me to get it together and it's all still not there but it's better than it's been in a long long time.
I believe the difference is People. The good people we surround ourselves with makes all the difference. Thanks for being here you guys.
LadeeC good points on the A/B's and preventative measures....and Hello to you and Kuli!!
Off to town for supplies now and RN this afternoon! busy day as usual. least I will be home when the heat is at it's worst...
Man that chocolate cake sounds good...I may try it, I have never made a scratch cake, always a box mix. we were too tired to do anything for Dad Wednes so I just might give it a go this weekend! yumm yumm!
Everyone thanks for being a good listener and have a great Friday. lol as if it is the end of the workweek, not, just the end of administrative workweek!
Mame .. we've been coping with recurrent UTI's for the last 4 years. I'd like to provide some info that I hope might ease the stress you're feeling. First, unless there's physical debris in the urine, the lab won't commit to a diagnosis of a UTI ... IF there's debris (it's cloudy), then they'll say, "yep .. UTI" but it will be non-specific and most Docs are likely to prescribe something like Cipro, which is kind of a generic (but specific to UTI infections) antibiotic. Regardless of the visual "results" the lab will THEN run cultures on the urine to get specific results. These *always* take 72 hours, at which point the doctor may prescribe something different. At that point, they've identified the strain of the infection .. and each one is documented to the doctor as reactive or nonreactive to very specific medications. Gah! huh?
Here's another catch .. especially in elders, when we give them antibiotics we're running the risk of 'creating a superbug' and more and more doctors are resisting treatment until our loved ones present with more serious symptoms. It's kind of a catch-22 .. if the symptoms worsen, they have to take more aggressive treatments, but if we give too many antibiotics, too often, the next UTI might not respond. So, 'tread with caution' is fairly standard, in my experience. Your mileage may vary.
Generally, a healhy(ish) body is pretty good at fighting its own fight with UTIs, especially if we can take prophylactic steps to help prevent them. Many people respond well to probiotics, others to cranberry, some to grapefruit seed extract, others to black cherry juice, or a combination.
Juju .. omg .. I am SO with you. I just got back from 10 hours in the emergency room. New something, this time. Bloody .. really bloody stools. In going over her health history, we 'discovered' (erroneously) that she had ALZ .. no! She's has dementia; never diagnosed with ALZ! Found out she had an allergy to aspirin. Really??? Funny, she's on a daily regimen of it. NOwhere in her records is all the surgeries she's had, her diagnosis of several other conditions. Ok, we corrected all that. Hmm .. hope it sticks .. this is her hospital of record and I've done this same thing with each admission for the last three years .. that's about 15 hospital stays.
*oops when the back fractures happened is the only question as they never looked at her back when she initially feel n broke hip n shoulder in Feb. I do believe it was the wheelchair incident tho as that was the turning point in her standing issues! and I just kept pushing her thru our P/T routine, poor thing!! I am heartbroken...I hope I didn't hurt her or damage her and the stress it caused ugghhh! happy happy thoughts!!! we good now and lot smarter for it!!!
Mame I feel you, I am so frustrated with the DR's n Hospitals....her records are loaded full of diagnosis never even communicated to me....WTF I wondered why the ER would always ask about her COPD...I would always say I am not aware of COPD and they would drop it, well it is in the file that she has it along with several other things....and these guys down south saying 1-6 mo's freaked me out! then to not even have that on the discharge summary just a UTI...I do agree we came in kinda frazzled and I was a wreck, sleep deprived and panicked over all the "stuff in records" and last ER nitemare with doc who had her head up her arse!!! But they never even listened to me...wrote she was in for chest pains and mental status when I explained we recently fractured ribs discovering back issues and now need her looked over head to toe for all issues that I am not aware of. So my rant is for our benefit. what you leave the dr office with is not what is in the "official record" and you must be in charge some how, I haven't figured that one out, YET!! given full access to all issues n records as her caregiver, as a medical team member! ....it will be a struggle to even let her enter into another hospital....Hope the GP appt Monday goes better!!
My longwinded point is MAME I am not surprised in the least by the delay! I Didn't sleep or eat for weeks after early june rib disaster which I made the doc xray back...they kept saying and still do say it her hip that causing problem but but truth is truth. she was released and standing from hip injury and only had problems when slipped outta chair onto touché, same time as released....I knew it was her back and we found fractures because I forced them to Xray back!!! and that is just a crumb of the whole story!
so now I think mom is gonna be fine...I know she not gonna be here forever but I do not believe she is 1-6mo....I know my momma in and out and she is doing pretty good considering.... Her lift chair busted today tho...it was going but the back totally just fell, to the floor. she was ok.... I went to bank this AM and stopped in a realtor office..they came by and she was really sharp...recent bcancer survivor 10 mos now...great lady, wise and helpful...she is bringing a handyman to walk thru next week!
Well chitter chatter I go again.... LOVE TO YOU ALL!!! HANG IN THERE. Juju
Jen - I so agree that some don't understand the depth of this thread. But SP went back as far as Miz so you would think she would have gotten a clue. Again, I have been so very blessed with most all I have met here ( minus the drive bys ) that I get worked up when someone tries to tell anyone how they should act or feel and judges their thoughts or words. I may not go to church every week but I try to understand each individual's situation and offer support as best I can based on that. That is my opinion of what a true Christian is. Not preaching to the choir about something they have no understanding of. That is my understanding of blessings - finding those who truly understand and can empathize with what you are going through. Can't help but strike back. So SP you have met your match. Love you Jen. Kuli :)
know what you mean mame,,,ah docs and pills and the waiting...wonder if it was them if they would not be a bit Pissed OFF too!?
Hey Diane, Hope you are doing OK there...Love Jen
bob miester owns it again... really..."Chill Sugar"
You know, when you fill out forms and what doesn't apply to you you can put N/A....Non-Applicable....That fits most of the Grossed haters. They come here, drop a bomb (usually in attempt to shame) and most have no idea the dimensions, let alone depth of the thread...just watch em blow by....wave... Jen
Hi everyone, I'm guilty of lurking lately. I'm doing pretty good overall. Just a bit emotional this week and that may be that today is one month since mom passed or that I went to the attorney about probate this week. Then again, it just might be the whole process of notifying different entities that mom has died. Mame, if it is any consolation, even if the doctor had given mom antibiotics before he got the culture back, it still might not have worked since it depends on what type of bacteria is causing the UTI. Mom used to get so confused, hallucinate and sleep a lot when she had a UTI. Make sure you give mom lots of yogurt to help with the stomach flora while she is on antibiotic. The last thing you need is poop soup. I'm sure you know this but sleep deprivation makes you forget the simplest things. Wish me luck this weekend. I have a friend coming over on the weekend and we are going to tackle sorting through mom's stuff. I have to go through everything carefully since she used to like to hide stuff in the most unusual places. I'm sure I'll also find parts for her sewing machine and other stuff since she went through a phase of dismantling EVERYTHING! One day I came home and she had taken the door knob off her bedroom door. I think I'm going to call it an early night. I'm still trying to get used to my full time schedule at work. It isn't any harder than taking care of mom, just different than what I had been accustom to. I pray for that all of you still in the trenches will get a good night's rest to face your trials.
Mame~What was their excuse not giving you a diagnosis when you called twice...was it because the dr. hadn't read the reports yet? I don't understand some dr.'s. My dr. is very strict about giving info over the phone. When it comes to getting the results of test I have to make another appt. The dr. I had before him would have his assistant call giving the results. I like the "old way" better. I am sorry your mom has had to suffer for 3 days when she could have been on an antibiotic already. I hope tomorrow you and she see a difference in her condition. You have every right to be angry, I would be too.
I don't caregive 24/7 but I know how hard it is for me at times and only imagine those of you caregiving 24/7....pay no attention to someone who plays being righteous over common sense. Bless you all for caregiving 24/7!!!
I haven't visited my mom since Sunday...just haven't felt up to it...my bad, but as a result I have not had any calls from her in 2 days. Hopefully she is accepting the situation. I will visit her tomorrow with the dog. We are heating up here going into the 100's, we had rain a couple days ago with high humidity which is not usual here. Our summers are tend to be dry heat and winters are humid with lots of fog.
Deef~I hope you are well...haven't heard from you and sending you Hugs as you journey through your loss.
Bobbie~Where are you? I hope all is good for you!
Flex~How are you doing? I hope you are doing well with working and your loss as well!
Stormy~How is the summer going with Conner out of school and caregiving for your father? I hope you are spending time with Conner.
Kuli! Thanks for standing up to the clueless! There's one every once in awhile who visits their mom or dad in a nh and has no idea about end stage Dementia or 24/7/365 caregiving. I love the bit about putting their initial on it to feel Special. omg. Seriously?
Sugarplum, this level of caregiving represented on this thread does not compare at all with caring for a child. You really are out of your depth. Write and vent all you want but be ready for the flashback when you come out with BS. Now those are some initials that actually mean something....
LadeeC! Welcome to the Home of Vent and Live! I thought that was pretty funny and we can all relate. Just like Mame said, nothing petty here. I was there with you when your head hit the desk.
Haha sharynmarie! Juju! keep it up girl, you are doing great. Thanks for the hug and yes there is someone in my life.... And the Cat.
Christina! thanks for the hug. I haven't seen all the new hugs yet! Jen! Thanks for making me the Gold medal winner haha. All I could think of was flour and baking a cake.
Did I ever tell you guys about the time my then husband was in a play and on opening night they were having a pot luck and he volunteered a chocolate cake by yours truly. You guys know the recipe on the back of the Hershey's cocoa powder tin... Perfect. So I make the cake and we put it on a big plate with a soup pot upside down to protect it and get into the car and make the 45 minute drive to the theater where the play is. When we get there I go to pull out the cake and he says, Wait a minute... let's see if they really need it... ok. So he goes in and comes back out and says, Leave it in the car. ok. He goes and does the play, it was pretty good and we hang out after and eat everybody else's cake and then go home and wreak havoc on this cake for 2 days.
That's a good cake on the back of the Hershey's cocoa. Frosting too.
At least I know why I am not skinny.
Big day here on the boat. We are rigging a digital antenna on the top of the boat so we can see regular tv. This should be interesting because it's line of sight signal and the tidal range here is about 10' so I expect that sometimes we might lose a signal when the tide goes out and the antenna is 10 feet lower. Inversely when the antenna is 10 feet higher I expect to be able to recieve London. ha.
OK, off to Radio Shack to get some doodads to hook up.
You all aren't going to believe it! 3 days after the urine specimen...and they called me (after I called 2x) and she does have a UTI!!!!! She could have been on antibiotics for 3 days already! F***!!!!!!!!! So, picked up the pills and she has started them as of about an hour ago! My brain is fried. She is loopy and anxious. I was so mad at the Dr office I couldn't even speak other than to confirm the drug store to fax the script to. AND "the dr has the blood tests in his cue to read but hasn't yet so we can't tell you about them" Well then....I guess when they call me about them I will ask why the urine specimen took so long...they made it sound like it wouldn't take that much time to test-does it? Anyway, I hope she gets some relief from all the pain and crap she is in poor thing. I am numb. And tired. 24/7/365 x 9 too!!! Plus running to her house for 4 years before that taking care of just about everything-just not every single day.... Sigh... Mame
Ohhh LadeeC-there is not petty here! Everyone has their breaking point and we completely understand!!!!! And being tired-or more tired than usual-it is the small stuff that really gets to you!!! Welcome to vent and live.....
Oy. I've had insomnia for days, now. Drank far too much coffee yesterday and didn't fall asleep until 2am. 6am I get a call .. expected to have to change diapers or something. Oh, no.
"Where's my necklace?"
Eh? Ya mean the one you haven't had for a few years?
"When it's actually light outside, I'll wake up and help you find it, k?"
Four hours later .. "Ready to look for your necklace?"
Ditto on Kuli and sharyn....OBMSP...try 24/7/9ys and say that....and the diapers are just a wee bit bigger and fuller and hardly can handle a full grown frail elder as a child would have been!
OK, Sugarplum. After reading your profile I can see why you wouldn't understand the frustrations the caregivers here experience day in day out, 24 hours a day, all by themselves. You "take care" of your mom who lives in a nursing home. Most people here have or had their loved ones living in THEIR homes with no extra help, no meal preparation by someone else, no money to buy special cups and such. In my humble opinion, it is YOU who needs to show some compassion! The people here were my lifeline while caring for my dad in HIS home with NO outside help with 24/7 responsibility. I take great offense to someone who has not lived the same life judging anyone here. I'll say the same to you as I've said to others who have judged, if you don't like what's written here, if you don't understand the situations, then go to another thread and be blessed. Miz, Bob and Kelly are just a few of the blessings brought into my life here. Kuli
oh ya mame, the most important of that type of depends was I tried the regular open tape side as hospital used those kind and they were not strong enough for bed/roll changing they would rip with just a little force. and sorry for double comment on HHA. I meant to cut n paste to end!
Oh a much better day here! still tired but returning to our normal routine....living outta car with the dogs was brutal! till we landed in a motel!! still sorting things out but got the GP/MD (not NP) to see us Monday and RN will be here tomoro!!! That will give me the weekend to get notes organized for the Appt Monday. It is supposed to be blazing hot this weekend, rain is gone tho so not that muggy heat, we are not used to that here, like in the south. I remember that from trips to New Orleans...Anyway that will keep us indoors and work on these records to get GP on board!
Mame-Depends are an excellent idea till you can get some help. I was told here that once HomeHealth is ordered they must respond within 48 business hours. Just fyi we use the "adjustable underwear" version as the can be a pull up or split and use Velcro tabs not gluey/tape tabs so can be checked or refit as needed...they are available only at walmart that I have found here. also FYI...I was told here that once HomeHealth is ordered by MD they must respond within 48 business hours. could be different in each area tho! Hope the pain meds are making her loopy...not something worse! you are in my thoughts! Jen-I had a lot of fun tearing out the kitchen light fixtures and a few other things I hated, not quite the same but it was therapeutic to just destroy something! ha ha ha Really contemplating this cat issue he made another mess last nite, and both boxes are clean. Maybe he still mad I left him, I will let it ride for another week!!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Juju, so sorry about your friend. Sounds like she had a good life, and didn't have to linger with a long illness.
Cat, let us know how the biopsy comes out, hoping for the best here.
Hope everyone has a good weekend.
OK, my time to VENT about me. Had the biopsy today. The doc said the worst part with the lanocaine (sp) injections as they give a burning sensation. He was right about that, it does burn, but it's manageable. He downplayed the sensation of having tissue removed from inside your breast. That hurt and I am no sissy.
I should have the lab results by Wednesday at the latest.
A million things I want to say to all of you, but I need to go back to so many posts. Mame: Hang in there and know we are all praying for you and your mom.
Juju: May I just offer this for what it is worth. Your cat has had a long life and just the mouth issues he suffers are very painful. If you can find a way to give him peace, that is probably the best thing to do. He depends on you to make the right decisions. Sorry for the pain you both experience. Such a difficult situation, but one that has to be dealt with.
Diane: Glad to hear from you. You just keep putting one foot in front of the other. We all have such respect for all you have done.
Hey Bobbie: Didn't get the ludes joke, but that's ok. Hope all is well with you and you will soon have tv channels. Try to avoid the news.
Speaking of the news, we went to the imaging center today and the television was on in the waiting room. Geez, it looked like Armageddon; fires here, floods there. What a flipping mess.
Hey, this sounds like a Republican conspiracy to me. Rape, pillage and plunder and all the while fiddle while Rome burns. Assholes.
Well, I feel better now.
Cat
RIP Wanda and prayers n blessings to Linda and the entire family! She was like a mom to me, we had become close over the last year (3ys working)!
86 years old 4foot 8 full of spunk! always wore a button saying "shit happens". had 6-8 clients she juggled, loved to stay busy! A strong sweet woman and friend!! Wanda will be sorely missed!
Well nurse said mom is in great shape, we will see what doc has to say Monday!
I made ma a huge pot of spaghetti sauce last nite, too. It is one of her fav's. Puree'd the gr beef n some spinach, zucchini, n carrots into it. It was pretty good even it was a thick paste of sauce! Pcheese fixes all !!!
Awesome bob, I am so happy for you.
take care all!
Luv,
Juju
Can't take 'Ludes and sit in the front row.....
(70's line)
Going up the dock and then back here to check in here and on Boni's thread, the 5:00 on Friday. Good crowd and the jokes are funny.
Made spagetti on the boat and going to take it up for dinner. What a change in my life to finally have a place to go.
There is life after caregiving and I am living proof. It took about 3 years for me to get it together and it's all still not there but it's better than it's been in a long long time.
I believe the difference is People.
The good people we surround ourselves with makes all the difference.
Thanks for being here you guys.
lovbob
most elders these days wont express their pain
communicate with her as she is willing
Kuli!!
Off to town for supplies now and RN this afternoon! busy day as usual. least I will be home when the heat is at it's worst...
Man that chocolate cake sounds good...I may try it, I have never made a scratch cake, always a box mix. we were too tired to do anything for Dad Wednes so I just might give it a go this weekend! yumm yumm!
Everyone thanks for being a good listener and have a great Friday. lol as if it is the end of the workweek, not, just the end of administrative workweek!
Mame .. we've been coping with recurrent UTI's for the last 4 years. I'd like to provide some info that I hope might ease the stress you're feeling. First, unless there's physical debris in the urine, the lab won't commit to a diagnosis of a UTI ... IF there's debris (it's cloudy), then they'll say, "yep .. UTI" but it will be non-specific and most Docs are likely to prescribe something like Cipro, which is kind of a generic (but specific to UTI infections) antibiotic. Regardless of the visual "results" the lab will THEN run cultures on the urine to get specific results. These *always* take 72 hours, at which point the doctor may prescribe something different. At that point, they've identified the strain of the infection .. and each one is documented to the doctor as reactive or nonreactive to very specific medications. Gah! huh?
Here's another catch .. especially in elders, when we give them antibiotics we're running the risk of 'creating a superbug' and more and more doctors are resisting treatment until our loved ones present with more serious symptoms. It's kind of a catch-22 .. if the symptoms worsen, they have to take more aggressive treatments, but if we give too many antibiotics, too often, the next UTI might not respond. So, 'tread with caution' is fairly standard, in my experience. Your mileage may vary.
Generally, a healhy(ish) body is pretty good at fighting its own fight with UTIs, especially if we can take prophylactic steps to help prevent them. Many people respond well to probiotics, others to cranberry, some to grapefruit seed extract, others to black cherry juice, or a combination.
Juju .. omg .. I am SO with you. I just got back from 10 hours in the emergency room. New something, this time. Bloody .. really bloody stools. In going over her health history, we 'discovered' (erroneously) that she had ALZ .. no! She's has dementia; never diagnosed with ALZ! Found out she had an allergy to aspirin. Really??? Funny, she's on a daily regimen of it. NOwhere in her records is all the surgeries she's had, her diagnosis of several other conditions. Ok, we corrected all that. Hmm .. hope it sticks .. this is her hospital of record and I've done this same thing with each admission for the last three years .. that's about 15 hospital stays.
Ahem.
My longwinded point is MAME I am not surprised in the least by the delay! I Didn't sleep or eat for weeks after early june rib disaster which I made the doc xray back...they kept saying and still do say it her hip that causing problem but but truth is truth. she was released and standing from hip injury and only had problems when slipped outta chair onto touché, same time as released....I knew it was her back and we found fractures because I forced them to Xray back!!! and that is just a crumb of the whole story!
so now I think mom is gonna be fine...I know she not gonna be here forever but I do not believe she is 1-6mo....I know my momma in and out and she is doing pretty good considering....
Her lift chair busted today tho...it was going but the back totally just fell, to the floor. she was ok....
I went to bank this AM and stopped in a realtor office..they came by and she was really sharp...recent bcancer survivor 10 mos now...great lady, wise and helpful...she is bringing a handyman to walk thru next week!
Well chitter chatter I go again....
LOVE TO YOU ALL!!!
HANG IN THERE.
Juju
4 networks and 2 church channels so nothing is on. Oy.
Wish I had that cake.
lovbob
Hey Diane, Hope you are doing OK there...Love Jen
bob miester owns it again...
really..."Chill Sugar"
You know, when you fill out forms and what doesn't apply to you you can put N/A....Non-Applicable....That fits most of the Grossed haters. They come here, drop a bomb (usually in attempt to shame) and most have no idea the dimensions, let alone depth of the thread...just watch em blow by....wave...
Jen
Mame, if it is any consolation, even if the doctor had given mom antibiotics before he got the culture back, it still might not have worked since it depends on what type of bacteria is causing the UTI. Mom used to get so confused, hallucinate and sleep a lot when she had a UTI. Make sure you give mom lots of yogurt to help with the stomach flora while she is on antibiotic. The last thing you need is poop soup. I'm sure you know this but sleep deprivation makes you forget the simplest things.
Wish me luck this weekend. I have a friend coming over on the weekend and we are going to tackle sorting through mom's stuff. I have to go through everything carefully since she used to like to hide stuff in the most unusual places. I'm sure I'll also find parts for her sewing machine and other stuff since she went through a phase of dismantling EVERYTHING! One day I came home and she had taken the door knob off her bedroom door.
I think I'm going to call it an early night. I'm still trying to get used to my full time schedule at work. It isn't any harder than taking care of mom, just different than what I had been accustom to. I pray for that all of you still in the trenches will get a good night's rest to face your trials.
Love ya,
Diane
I don't caregive 24/7 but I know how hard it is for me at times and only imagine those of you caregiving 24/7....pay no attention to someone who plays being righteous over common sense. Bless you all for caregiving 24/7!!!
I haven't visited my mom since Sunday...just haven't felt up to it...my bad, but as a result I have not had any calls from her in 2 days. Hopefully she is accepting the situation. I will visit her tomorrow with the dog. We are heating up here going into the 100's, we had rain a couple days ago with high humidity which is not usual here. Our summers are tend to be dry heat and winters are humid with lots of fog.
Deef~I hope you are well...haven't heard from you and sending you Hugs as you journey through your loss.
Bobbie~Where are you? I hope all is good for you!
Flex~How are you doing? I hope you are doing well with working and your loss as well!
Stormy~How is the summer going with Conner out of school and caregiving for your father? I hope you are spending time with Conner.
Hugs to everyone!!
Kuli! Thanks for standing up to the clueless! There's one every once in awhile who visits their mom or dad in a nh and has no idea about end stage Dementia or 24/7/365 caregiving.
I love the bit about putting their initial on it to feel Special. omg. Seriously?
Sugarplum, this level of caregiving represented on this thread does not compare at all with caring for a child.
You really are out of your depth. Write and vent all you want but be ready for the flashback when you come out with BS.
Now those are some initials that actually mean something....
LadeeC! Welcome to the Home of Vent and Live! I thought that was pretty funny and we can all relate. Just like Mame said, nothing petty here. I was there with you when your head hit the desk.
Haha sharynmarie!
Juju! keep it up girl, you are doing great. Thanks for the hug and yes there is someone in my life.... And the Cat.
Christina! thanks for the hug. I haven't seen all the new hugs yet!
Jen! Thanks for making me the Gold medal winner haha. All I could think of was flour and baking a cake.
Did I ever tell you guys about the time my then husband was in a play and on opening night they were having a pot luck and he volunteered a chocolate cake by yours truly. You guys know the recipe on the back of the Hershey's cocoa powder tin... Perfect.
So I make the cake and we put it on a big plate with a soup pot upside down to protect it and get into the car and make the 45 minute drive to the theater where the play is.
When we get there I go to pull out the cake and he says, Wait a minute... let's see if they really need it...
ok.
So he goes in and comes back out and says, Leave it in the car.
ok.
He goes and does the play, it was pretty good and we hang out after and eat everybody else's cake and then go home and wreak havoc on this cake for 2 days.
That's a good cake on the back of the Hershey's cocoa. Frosting too.
At least I know why I am not skinny.
Big day here on the boat. We are rigging a digital antenna on the top of the boat so we can see regular tv. This should be interesting because it's line of sight signal and the tidal range here is about 10' so I expect that sometimes we might lose a signal when the tide goes out and the antenna is 10 feet lower. Inversely when the antenna is 10 feet higher I expect to be able to recieve London. ha.
OK, off to Radio Shack to get some doodads to hook up.
Love you guys more than you know.
lovbob
"Where's my necklace?"
Eh? Ya mean the one you haven't had for a few years?
"When it's actually light outside, I'll wake up and help you find it, k?"
Four hours later .. "Ready to look for your necklace?"
"What necklace?"
*head strikes desktop*
Mame-Depends are an excellent idea till you can get some help. I was told here that once HomeHealth is ordered they must respond within 48 business hours. Just fyi we use the "adjustable underwear" version as the can be a pull up or split and use Velcro tabs not gluey/tape tabs so can be checked or refit as needed...they are available only at walmart that I have found here. also FYI...I was told here that once HomeHealth is ordered by MD they must respond within 48 business hours. could be different in each area tho!
Hope the pain meds are making her loopy...not something worse! you are in my thoughts!
Jen-I had a lot of fun tearing out the kitchen light fixtures and a few other things I hated, not quite the same but it was therapeutic to just destroy something! ha ha ha
Really contemplating this cat issue he made another mess last nite, and both boxes are clean. Maybe he still mad I left him, I will let it ride for another week!!
Hope everyone is doing well!
Luv,
Juju!
Good luck...