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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Jen Im so proud of you for getting showered, dressed and sewing. I swear I wear the same 4 pairs of slacks everyday of the year. Now that I have time and TONS od fabric I need to get sewing too. Send me your address on Facebook and I'll mail some fabric to you too. Warning, mom had very colorful taste when it came to fabric :)
And if HER eating the pork livers isn't bad enough .... she will feed the Chihuahua dog pieces of it ... and she doesn't put it in the dog bowl ... she will throw pieces of meat out into the middle of the living room floor on my beige, shag rug.
Yesterday Mom cooked Pork livers. Now ... if you have read my posts, you know I despise the smell of pork. YUCK. Pork livers! How gross can that be?? The body filtering system for a filthy pig and she's smackin' and eatin' .. yuck.
Thank you everyone... I did get up early today and took a shower after standing in the rain for a bit, felt nice. did some sewing. Am pulling a 1974 here and turning a couple old sheets into around the house mou mous...not Star Wars of course, no big rainbows either just plain ones...I don't know...I just gave an interview to a woman form the AP about discrimination in the medical field for fat women. There was stuff I couldn't really mention but I did mention being a full time "care giver" gonna use that term lightly now...I don't care, I just provide services...She mentioned she has a sister or cousin doing care giving too and her life is not the same...or even close...yep...Not Even Close...I am close to losing it at time, and the first of the month cash in wallet has me seriously thinking of staling it and running away..but if I could do that. Would I be here? thank you meanwhile AND JUJU AND FRUSTRATED I HOPE YOU FIND THIS SITE AS HELPFUL AS I CONTINUE TO...AND WE ALL FIND SOME PEACE SOME HOW SOON.... Love Jen
Thank you cat for hanging in here. What if it is more YEARS?, what if he sees 95 or 96...God I really can't take that. I really can't and I don't think my mom can either...
Thank you bobbie for you original post that I KNOW has saved lives and sanity and given so many people hope and allowed them to let off steam while others condemn them for feeling they are entitled to it! Thank you deef for always being there, and rip and mame and sharyn and Cuz with laughter for solace, and Diane who i think shares a lot of my pains minus that she really loved her mom and has that extra pain to deal with.
Cuz! Today's the day for Mike's doctor visit. Hope he gets some relief and I hope you keep us posted. Love to all. I always wondered if there was a big adjustment to them taking veins out of someone's legs for bypass. I can't imagine the pain he must be in.
Juju! Mame! Flex! wassup. Frustrated! Welcome to the Home of Vent and Live!
ok, not supposed to rain today so I am off to work on the outside for a few hours. The heat index will hit 105 degrees so we have to be really careful.
Jen! Steal some $$ from FP and go get some new clothes!
I think I read somewhere that we try to make ourselves unattractive when we know someone that makes us sick is creeping on us. FP has been creeping on you since you were a little girl and I hope you take back your power and don't let him win. Don't let your mom win either. We know you love her but she is sick with the FP crazy and not thinking right. That's a HUGE problem with caregiving the crazy. It makes US not think right!
Demented = Crazy. Never forget that.
Love you Jen.
Sharynmarie, glad you are being proactive. I know that sometimes a facility won't let family visit for a few weeks while a patient becomes acclimated. It's brutally hard but what do you do when there is no reason? There's no North Star to steer by.
Cat: Now you're talking. You hang out with us and let's get our girl Jen through this.
I wrote a long post and then lost it. Bottom line is I have decided I will not leave here until Fart Pants takes the final dirt bath/oven bake. I do not want to miss that long awaited moment.
Jen, in the meantime, please take a shower and wash you hair. I have no way to truly experience what you feel, but it doesn't really matter. You need to do something everyday that you can feel good about. Take a shower first thing in the morning. Take all of your clothes; wash and iron them. If you are up to it, do that for your mom. Just do something that is positive. It's not about someone telling you that you did good, it's about you knowing you made something cleaner than it was before. Maybe you can write about what it feels like to iron a shirt or take a shower after not bathing for so long. Keep it close to the chest. Keep it where you are and know that we are with you in spirit.
Bobbi is right Jen, we all care about you. Your so smart, and talented. Hang in there. Sharyn, your Mom sounds a lot like mine, don't let her get to you. She is just trying to manipulate, and lay on the guilt trip. Take care.
omg Frustrated. Yup, this is the real deal and boy oh boy it can be the most insane pressure test. arg. For some reason all things poop become the big events of the day and there ain't enough AirWick to go around... Little red bucket, eh? Nice. haha
Jen! how are you doing? I know it's rough but please check in and let us know. C'mon beautiful girl.
This is just the funniest thread I've ever read in my life, and it is real life! Is this real life? Too freakin' funny! I thought only my Mom grossed me out what with chewing and smacking, and not flushing the toilet or even putting on the fan, so we can hear her poop, uggg! Here's a good one, she smokes so she spits in a little red bucket in the backyard, talk about gross!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ewe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jen~As the others have said grab on...you are valuable to all of us so please take care of yourself. Let us know what is going on and how you are doing!!
Oh Jen, I hate that you are not being cared for properly! Unjust! Please look after yourself because, as you are painfully aware, no one else will do it, not even your own mom. There is a future for you as a human being and as a very talented writer. Those of us on the other side are living proof that we can come back from this. But only when we take dramatic measures! Please Jen!
Mom's taken fp to get new glasses...he doesn't want, and mine are starting to make my eyes go funny but I don't care...I have gotten so low, I don't brush my hair what is left of it, I dress like a slob, don't bathe for days on end...The real thing...Really enjoying the hole....
I am so sorry to see you go. Just as you gave me a litebulb to pull me thru that bad day....The ALZ walk...I now have one positive goal in this sea of chaos. All because of you!!! and I hope to have inspired a few "friends" too. We shall see!
All I can say is if we can pull our lives out of the crapper my goals have changed. I wanted to go for wildlife biology/environment etc... They got enough help there. I want to help these poor elderly folks being neglected by the system. I even now am upset with the VA... As I talked with our contact and asked her to go look into retro. she sed they don't do that, don't go retro, I sed yes they do cause they gave me 1 year already and if they gave me 1 why cant they give me the other 7 lost out on. I am upset because when I did find out about it was in my CG sppt group her at a facility, she came out and told us it is they promoting it, it is underused. and I called the VA when dad past explained our situation and they offered my only his burial....so why not go back all the way? anyway, just rambling...it's only 6 here and cant call anyone after 8. I am organized and ready to roll....
Morning everyone, What a nice day I finally got 2 solid nites of sleep! whew...feels good. I still no time for catching up on you all...did graze over this page barely. I have to say, I totally agree with Bob. I had sed that somewhere else...."wouldn't it be great if we could all just meet up, we share and know so much intimately...be fun to just all get together n get hammered" I am nice n rested..ready for the battle of my life and could not be more happy about it. I tell ya they have messed with the wrong person this time.
Wow it's a sad state of our society when your tell your story bout how your mom was butchered in our hospital....and the response is "yup. took out two of my friends also" .that Is the second time in a week to hear that
To the sink to throw up....and boy o boy I can see why...if these files could talk!
There is more quality control in building an antenna for the navy than the system that is supposed to take care of our sick loved ones"
I gotta take Ciara to the vet on top of all this..I'm praying it is arthritis rather than tumors...I hope so I need my girl here with me!!! And I think I may just have to put the cat down..i just cant take the shitting everywhere and now it warming up he will roam, and sometimes for a day...I worry so...as he is so old...that he may not be coming back, etc....got into it with a coon or Mlion or bear etc...they all just up the mountain ....idk it is a heartbreaking decision for me...but cleaning up after him is hard, he throws up all the time too.. just clear liquid..so I don't see it, I slipped in it the other day...so I just feel with mom going downhill so fast in matter of weeks. He will be my breaking point. I have to much stress in my life already. this is going to be tough one to decide..he otherwise is happy healthy boy....Romeo, the roamer!! I guess I will see how it goes this week with home health etc...and I need to get some darn glasses for myself. I can type but barely read..it's all blurry, etc and when I tired like this lines start jumping, lol!!! Hope you all have a great day...I am busy as heck...LOVE AND SUPPORT to you all!
Yeah it sucks big time right now. Mom is on a true rampage (her normal behavior as we have always known her to be). I called the community asking if they could remove the phone from her apartment. We are not visiting until she calms down, her behavior Saturday when we were there was very bad, screaming, yelling as loud as she could. Yet they tell us she is fine when we are not there, except for the phone calls. This too is her normal behavior where she treats family horribly but is nice and sweet to others. She is eating well and participating in activities. I don't know if increasing the antidepressant will help or getting her on an anti anxiety medication...I have concerns about Ativan, any suggestions...Seroquel, Risperidone??? Any of you have any experience these drugs...We don't want her to a zombie either. It is very heartbreaking and I can't handle her when she gets like this...it brings back too many feelings from our childhood, the memories of the abuse...this is why she can't live with me. The med tech told me to not visit for a few more days which I wasn't going to anyway because I know as soon as she sees me she will start a scene.
Cuz, sorry about your brother, hope the Dr can figure something out. As for my foot, I just finally had it with the cast, (it's been on 9 weeks, and 10 weeks since I broke it).. Took it off today. Still wearing the soft splint (heavy ace bandage). Feels pretty good so far. (haven't told the Doc yet). Fixed BBQ ribs, deviled eggs, and sugar free chocolate pie for my stepdad, and put a big vase of flowers in the middle of the table. But, he doesn't spew food yet, eww, so sorry Jen. Both the dogs got a bath today, they love to play in water, unless it involves soap. Go figure. Hope everyone has a good week. Love Shirley
Hey cuz. Mike goes to the dr tuesday to find out if they are able to do anything with his legs. He has a hard time walking now and it is getting worse. Everybody else is doing great. Love ya
Jen, ewww.... it will end. All you have to do is outlast it. Outwit, outlast... how does the motto for Survivor go?
We are getting used to the new marina. It's very quiet with no My Cousin Vinny Train. I have to admit, I don't miss that at all but miss hearing the train horns every once in awhile, but when the train horn is followed by 125 cars about 10 times a day.. woohoo!
Shirley I have no idea what the Cat will find out there. So far she has stayed on the boat and when someone she doesn't know comes down the dock she will come inside the deckhouse. I know that there are crab here but the dock is in far better shape than the last place so the little crab don't come up between the planks and tempt her off the boat. How is your foot doing Shirley?
Sharynmarie, ow ow with your mom calling from memory care. That has got to be so hard and I hope that you are finding the strength to cope. I know it's so hard and my heart goes out to you.
Mame! hope you are doing ok and had a great time with your friends.
Cat! Deef! Rip!! All the crew, past and present, I sure wish we could have a convention somewhere.
I hope everyone is doing as well as they can with what they have to deal with.
Too late...breakfast and the explosive choking...I know it has something to do with me, he thinks to say something every time I GET UP and so he has food in his throat and starts a hawking it across the room. turns purple...moms upset he's upset so upset he doesn't have breath to blame to food this time....God just let this end soon please...
Fathers Day dinner for Step Dad tomorrow. Going to cut a big vase of flowers for the table, so I don't have to watch him chew. Poor guy he has a terrible time chewing, and a feel sorry for him, but it is still gross. Sharyn, so sorry about your Mom, that has got to be stressful. But, you are doing the best you can for her, and her dog. Mame, so glad you had a good time last night. Hope your husbands news isn't too bad. Maybe he just wanted an excuse to not go to dinner??? Jen, horse flies are blood suckers. The one advantage of having a horse, is they prefer to bite the horse, and not me. My old horse Kid, would stop in his tracks, and turn his head around so I could swat the fly off his nose, or shake his head towards his tail if it was on his rump. Juju have a good time with your BFF. Hey, Bobbi, what is the cat catching at your new port?
I wanna say sorry I am self absorbed again all I talk bout is me, but I proud of how well I am taking care of mama! Im exhausted from it.. cant see to read anything barely I wish I could cuz I am relaxing rest of weekend as should be! But all I can say is MIRACULOUS! my Angelique is truly my Angel and all you guys tooo...
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Thank you cat for hanging in here. What if it is more YEARS?, what if he sees 95 or 96...God I really can't take that. I really can't and I don't think my mom can either...
Thank you bobbie for you original post that I KNOW has saved lives and sanity and given so many people hope and allowed them to let off steam while others condemn them for feeling they are entitled to it!
Thank you deef for always being there, and rip and mame and sharyn and Cuz with laughter for solace, and Diane who i think shares a lot of my pains minus that she really loved her mom and has that extra pain to deal with.
I always wondered if there was a big adjustment to them taking veins out of someone's legs for bypass. I can't imagine the pain he must be in.
Juju! Mame! Flex! wassup.
Frustrated! Welcome to the Home of Vent and Live!
ok, not supposed to rain today so I am off to work on the outside for a few hours. The heat index will hit 105 degrees so we have to be really careful.
love you guys,
lovbob
I think I read somewhere that we try to make ourselves unattractive when we know someone that makes us sick is creeping on us.
FP has been creeping on you since you were a little girl and I hope you take back your power and don't let him win. Don't let your mom win either. We know you love her but she is sick with the FP crazy and not thinking right.
That's a HUGE problem with caregiving the crazy. It makes US not think right!
Demented = Crazy. Never forget that.
Love you Jen.
Sharynmarie, glad you are being proactive. I know that sometimes a facility won't let family visit for a few weeks while a patient becomes acclimated. It's brutally hard but what do you do when there is no reason? There's no North Star to steer by.
Cat: Now you're talking. You hang out with us and let's get our girl Jen through this.
lovbob
I wrote a long post and then lost it. Bottom line is I have decided I will not leave here until Fart Pants takes the final dirt bath/oven bake. I do not want to miss that long awaited moment.
Jen, in the meantime, please take a shower and wash you hair. I have no way to truly experience what you feel, but it doesn't really matter. You need to do something everyday that you can feel good about. Take a shower first thing in the morning. Take all of your clothes; wash and iron them. If you are up to it, do that for your mom. Just do something that is positive. It's not about someone telling you that you did good, it's about you knowing you made something cleaner than it was before. Maybe you can write about what it feels like to iron a shirt or take a shower after not bathing for so long. Keep it close to the chest. Keep it where you are and know that we are with you in spirit.
For some reason all things poop become the big events of the day and there ain't enough AirWick to go around...
Little red bucket, eh? Nice. haha
Jen! how are you doing? I know it's rough but please check in and let us know. C'mon beautiful girl.
lovbob
I hate that you are not being cared for properly! Unjust! Please look after yourself because, as you are painfully aware, no one else will do it, not even your own mom. There is a future for you as a human being and as a very talented writer. Those of us on the other side are living proof that we can come back from this. But only when we take dramatic measures! Please Jen!
lovbob
Cattails......
I am so sorry to see you go. Just as you gave me a litebulb to pull me thru that bad day....The ALZ walk...I now have one positive goal in this sea of chaos. All because of you!!! and I hope to have inspired a few "friends" too. We shall see!
anyway, just rambling...it's only 6 here and cant call anyone after 8. I am organized and ready to roll....
What a nice day I finally got 2 solid nites of sleep! whew...feels good.
I still no time for catching up on you all...did graze over this page barely.
I have to say, I totally agree with Bob. I had sed that somewhere else...."wouldn't it be great if we could all just meet up, we share and know so much intimately...be fun to just all get together n get hammered"
I am nice n rested..ready for the battle of my life and could not be more happy about it. I tell ya they have messed with the wrong person this time.
Wow it's a sad state of our society when your tell your story bout how your mom was butchered in our hospital....and the response is "yup. took out two of my friends also" .that Is the second time in a week to hear that
To the sink to throw up....and boy o boy I can see why...if these files could talk!
There is more quality control in building an antenna for the navy than the system that is supposed to take care of our sick loved ones"
I gotta take Ciara to the vet on top of all this..I'm praying it is arthritis rather than tumors...I hope so I need my girl here with me!!! And I think I may just have to put the cat down..i just cant take the shitting everywhere and now it warming up he will roam, and sometimes for a day...I worry so...as he is so old...that he may not be coming back, etc....got into it with a coon or Mlion or bear etc...they all just up the mountain ....idk it is a heartbreaking decision for me...but cleaning up after him is hard, he throws up all the time too.. just clear liquid..so I don't see it, I slipped in it the other day...so I just feel with mom going downhill so fast in matter of weeks. He will be my breaking point. I have to much stress in my life already. this is going to be tough one to decide..he otherwise is happy healthy boy....Romeo, the roamer!!
I guess I will see how it goes this week with home health etc...and I need to get some darn glasses for myself. I can type but barely read..it's all blurry, etc and when I tired like this lines start jumping, lol!!!
Hope you all have a great day...I am busy as heck...LOVE AND SUPPORT to you all!
As for my foot, I just finally had it with the cast, (it's been on 9 weeks, and 10 weeks since I broke it).. Took it off today. Still wearing the soft splint (heavy ace bandage). Feels pretty good so far. (haven't told the Doc yet).
Fixed BBQ ribs, deviled eggs, and sugar free chocolate pie for my stepdad, and put a big vase of flowers in the middle of the table. But, he doesn't spew food yet, eww, so sorry Jen.
Both the dogs got a bath today, they love to play in water, unless it involves soap. Go figure.
Hope everyone has a good week. Love Shirley
Jen, ewww.... it will end. All you have to do is outlast it. Outwit, outlast... how does the motto for Survivor go?
We are getting used to the new marina. It's very quiet with no My Cousin Vinny Train. I have to admit, I don't miss that at all but miss hearing the train horns every once in awhile, but when the train horn is followed by 125 cars about 10 times a day.. woohoo!
Shirley I have no idea what the Cat will find out there. So far she has stayed on the boat and when someone she doesn't know comes down the dock she will come inside the deckhouse. I know that there are crab here but the dock is in far better shape than the last place so the little crab don't come up between the planks and tempt her off the boat.
How is your foot doing Shirley?
Sharynmarie, ow ow with your mom calling from memory care. That has got to be so hard and I hope that you are finding the strength to cope. I know it's so hard and my heart goes out to you.
Mame! hope you are doing ok and had a great time with your friends.
Cat! Deef! Rip!! All the crew, past and present, I sure wish we could have a convention somewhere.
I hope everyone is doing as well as they can with what they have to deal with.
lovbob
Sharyn, so sorry about your Mom, that has got to be stressful. But, you are doing the best you can for her, and her dog.
Mame, so glad you had a good time last night. Hope your husbands news isn't too bad. Maybe he just wanted an excuse to not go to dinner???
Jen, horse flies are blood suckers. The one advantage of having a horse, is they prefer to bite the horse, and not me. My old horse Kid, would stop in his tracks, and turn his head around so I could swat the fly off his nose, or shake his head towards his tail if it was on his rump.
Juju have a good time with your BFF.
Hey, Bobbi, what is the cat catching at your new port?