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You are ok and are not selfish or self absorbed or any of that.
8 years is a long time to be operating in a vacuum but at least it wasn't 10 or 15 or longer. You are here now and we will come up with a lot of stuff some you might use and some you might not. It's all good and you will know what's right for you.
1. The Neurologist.
When I took my mom into see one of these specialists in 06 he stated that the Dementia started presenting maybe 2 years before. I said no, that's not true. With what I have learned over the past 2 years is that the Dementia has been presenting for over 20 years. He disagreed. I said: Not too far from now you are going to find that I am right and that some Dementias present decades out. Google it.... they are now talking about early symptoms. Some of which I have. Hopefully it's the pot.
The point is that medicine is an art and they can only do what they can do with what they know. If he doesn't specialize he isn't going to be the smartest guy in the room. He's going to know how to order tests and how to interpret them but the fact remains that this is a progressive disease. This is a dive you are not going to pull out of. Acceptance of this fact is KEY.
You are living with a Dementia patient and since it is widely known that a Dementia patient can pull more cognitive behavior out of their butts when they are at the doctor, you just need to correct his misconceptions and guide him to a better conclusion. Just like you did when you told him that you had read up on it and were going to become more proactive.
With my mom I kept her on the Namenda and Aricept untill a week before she died. As long as she had no trouble swallowing them I saw that they helped.
Hopefully by the time this generation becomes more symptomatic there will be medicine for earlier stages and I am sure that BigPharma researchers are way more informed about the disease than a GP or MD that is not specializing. No harm, no foul just is the way it is.
The grieving process is brutal because you will grieve before and you will grieve after. You are grieving now and have been since your dad got sick. You are exhausted.
2. We want you to write. We don't care if you write 10 posts in a row. We will read them all. Some will read every word and some will just look for Cuz's jokes. It all works. When someone has something to say they will and just because you don't see a lot of posts doesn't mean that no one gives a damn. They do. They are just dealing with their own crazy and it does them some good to know that there are other crazy situations out there with folks that are popping up here to sound off. This is hard work and it would be easier to dig ditches for the over 8 years that you have been doing this. At least you would have had a day off once a week and would be around other people and someone would have had a birthday and there would have been cake.
3. Yes. You need a lawyer and you need a Power of Attorney (POA) and check the will. That's enough to start with. There's more but it's easy peasy.
It sounds like you live about 2 miles past resume speed so maybe going to the nearest big suburb might find you a better choice of attorneys. It took 2 shots to get mom's papers right but you will get that done and it will make things easier for you.
4. Don't hammer yourself. What, did the house go to hell and there's a mess in the garage? So what. Inch by inch you can do this because now you are getting a plan together and that's the KEY out of the mess.
5. You are putting your sentences together just fine since we all know wtf you are talking about. Well done.
OK, I have to run off the boat and readjust these fenders. This thing is moaning and squeaking. Will check in later.
You're going to be OK Juju.
I am posting this without proofing it so if the'res a misteke hoppfuly iz th pt.
I mean 10 ys ago I was working my way in thriving sunny silicon valley companies working in Production and Materials Management and I now I cant even put together a sentence. and failing miserably at managing us!!! Isolated in a logging country, pretty but very slow and limited resources (and DR's for that matter, erggg). I am thankful for her injury in Feb for really snapping me out of it it just hard to deal with the aftermath, now, How did this happen to a relatively competent working individual...how did it become such a freakin mess!!! I think I deny or ignore to avoid it as I saw was a typical symptom of the situation as well and having absolutely no one to help make the decisions...to reason with me, call me on a bad move, idk....
I think maybe I should get a elder care lawyer next cause I really don't know what to do!!! tooo much has gone toooo far is my fear!! I need some professionals :0)! Again this area is not the greatest resources, can one find an online or long distance attorney, who specializes in this??? anyone??
This visit to the Neurologist actually is wearing on me now.... as I look into more things...neurology should have been done long ago..HOW did I not know this... I truly feel like I have been in a coma for 8 ys... dads death was traumatic completely destroyed what family I had, and catapulted ma into my lap, I did the best I could but I stand here today in utter shock 8ys of my life has literally disappeared. Most things are as they were then but compounded by neglect....
I have determined minimal work should go into the home as if something happens we will lose it so doesn't make sense to fix much rite now anyway! have made that decision so relieves some stressors there...but I digress
I feel glad to have this place to vent but I feel bad that I am so self absorbed. I read and hear these stories and want to say something to try to help someone and am terrible at it! It always turns to me....I apologize for this!!! I don't mean to be selfish! I am still new ranting stage here! I hope when things improve for us I can be more supportive! I always notice hindsight!
Oh the "cats"... Mine had become a "roamer" once the dogs came along...spending most time outside up the mountain or who knows? Since I locked him in n left for a week he Has been a homebody, crawling all over me, in my face, slept next to my head several nights, hasn't done that in 10ys. Its kinda sweet to have him back!!! Actaully Petuyeeehe rubbing his face on mine nose to nose while im trying to type this got hair stuck to my lips now, ughhhh....
Thank goodness he does most of his hunting outdoors my extremities are safe!
Hi there, Love to you all! hanging in here! smiling again today! not much getting done lil bit here n there but lil is better than none, today I will be busy tho....
How are you all doing? It is rainy day here, has been cloudy n showering since the weekend. Yesterday was roasting tho, crazy weather here, we call it "Bipolar" climate, hahaha.... That is Southern Oregon Living tho, what makes it green n pretty. Long cool wet winters are brutal tho when it comes to keeping spirits up! Oct-May but spring does give us nice breaks like yesterday often!
Took ma to the neurologist yesterday for first time...I have been reporting fainting spells for years to her DR and he never sez much about them. I insisted on finding out more about them recently so they sent me to him. He was almost rude to me at first, saying why she hear now, it's too late to help her dementia. When I sed it was for fainting but also what role do you play in the dementia. he sed well if I am involved early enough I can help her but not much now. He also said her Namenda and Aricept will no longer be of use shortly and would discontinue them. he sed on the scale 0-30 she bout a 12 at 10 he would stop meds. I think I heard her 5 years ago say she was an 18..
Anyway I have been taking her to a dr regularly for 8 years who never even mentioned a neurology workup or any other treatment path than meds. I explained this and I was ignorant and had just followed dr's leads and recently found AC and AA website and have read and learned a lot about disease and realize it is up to me to become aggressive/proactive and learn as much as I can now, I know it late but!!! His demeanor changed he was very helpful after that! I do like him, so anyway he is ordering test and catscan n eeg (I think, have to double check my notes) for fainting spells. Not sure what we will do with the info next visit should be more informative, I will def have lots of questions for him.
So what do you all know about nuerologist role and what he sed bout her meds??
Cattails..I also rescue animals... I guess I got my dad's big heart for animals. We have rescued my lilly off the busy 4 lane street. Rescued and own 6 cats...3 outside and 3 inside. My sister gave me a turtle red eared slider got his when he was the size of a quarter now he is the size of a football...and 2 years ago the neighbors dog cornered a cockatiel...yep we have him too. We have about 20 squirrels that we feed in various feeders outside. Each year in the winter there are a few that put their noses up agains our windows looking for the good nuts from the bowl. We hand them out..and they literally take them out of our hands. Yes I love animals...and have a heart when I see one that needs TLC. So I am in awe of you...for rescuing an owl. Because I have a thing for Owls... love them. Blessings all...g'night
Bobbie: I think I posted about the baby owl we saved. He was in a very large cage while recovering and growing, but sometimes we would let him roost in the house on a plant stand that he loved. When we would go upstairs to bed, he would fly up the stairway and down the hall to our room. You comment about moving your hand under the blankets made me think of him. My DH would get into bed and then wiggle his toes under the blankets. Baby (the owl) would swoop down on his toes, like it was a mouse in the grass. OMG, such a precious creature. It's amazing to me how much we can bond with the oddest little creatures and they with us. Baby eventually went to a rehab place for barn owls. I'm sure he did beautifully as this place made sure they could learn to hunt and survive.
Bobbie~LOL!! I mean that I haven't gotten to know all you very well. You have all been very supportive of me and for that I will always be grateful. I think I have decided that I will give Midget the Squidget a fair trial. I have to admit I love the little critter and I know how much she means to mom. I thank you all for for accepting me, it means so much and I am getting emotional like I always do, but thank you so much!!♥ I will bring over Midgets cage tomorrow and start introducing her to my Tiger Kitty. Thank you Bobbie and Cat, I appreciate more that your know!!♥♥
Sharynmarie: You are my sister always. We don't have to post to each other all the time to feel and care for them.
Cats are a wicked group. I had one that use to love to lay in bed with me while I read at night. When we got our Sheltie, Kate, (just a baby) she needed to be on the bed too. The cat would look at her and Kate would start to sweat, in a figurative way of speech, then the cat would leap, throw her arms around Kate's neck and chew on her eyebrow. Kate would stay absolutely still with her eyes wide. Once "Precious" released her grip, Kate would spring off the bed and just run and run, then back up she would come. Just had to get all that anxiety out. Of course, the cat would be above it all, just calmly waiting for the dog to come back and do it all over again.
And there is nothing like a hand under the blanket to get a cat it kill mode. Hope you are healing, Bobbie.
Hey whaddya mean you don't post enough to have that friendship..?? You've nailed boat time haven't you? Any post that ends with 00...
You sure do post enough and when folks hang out for awhile it's great. Some will hang out and then lurk for months and months and then post again and some just move on to another space in time and some come in and out and we are here with the light on.
It's all good but please know that we would consider you and any like minded more than twice poster old or new a friend.
And, I went to a Dodgers game in LA and there's more action watching dough rise. I had more fun watching the guy I was with eat 5 Dodger Dogs.
OK, midge the dog. and clawshank the cat. can you do a test run and see if they have a shot at it?
If you are saying that you like the dog and the dog likes you and you know the cat is going to hate anything that has 4 legs so how about a test run and make sure you have a big spray container of water. You might not even need it and the cat always heads for high ground when things go south..
Mame~Good for you for starting a fire under your sibs butts. Apparently your sil was not as close as you thought or she would have understood. I leave it up to my husband to deal with his family and he is really pretty good about. I have manipulated a time or two...an example is I bought my husband tickets for a triple A baseball team in the city 30 minutes from us...my intentions were for him to like the games and spend more time with our son (when he lived here) and his dad. It worked. Now he buys a partial season pass of a certain # of games and takes his dad or his brother (our son doesn't live close enough to go now). That is how I manipulate. Whether his father and brother understand that or not I don't know. I personally do not like the games because they are soooooooo slow. I will give in and go to a couple over the summer since my hubby is so good about doing some things with me that I like. You did good by sending that email!!! Bobbie~What fun is there in a visible hand as to one that is moving under the covers, LOL!!! Sorry you got sliced and diced :=( ! CapnHardass~You are not the first to have that impression, but glad you realized it was wrong. These ladies and gents have been posting to each other for a long time and as a result, they have developed a real friendship with each other. I don't post often enough to develop that friendship but I do respect it.
As you know, I am out on FMLA for 4 weeks. Today I have lunch with mom, did all the usual stuff with her...a shower and shampoo, change the sheets, gather up all her dirty laundry so I can do it at home. We walked the dog...however, poor Midget (mom's poodle) is not adjusting to assisted living. She left in the apartment from 8:30-6pm alone. Although the aides are walking her throughout the day, Midget is having accidents in the apartment. I bought a potty patch but honestly, I don't have the time to train her to use it and even if I did, how can I get mom to pick up the potty patch using both hands on each end of it so that pee does not dribble out on the carpet and place it on the balcony during the day??? The community is doing everything they can on their end as I am, but lets face it, they are not dog sitters. Alas, I think we are going to have to remove Midget. There is an opening in the memory care unit which will make it easier for the aides to access Midget and it costs less to have mom living there than in assisted living even though she is adjusting. It looks like we are going to move mom to the memory care unit, however, they will only give Midget 2 weeks to adjust. I am debating whether I want to try to acclimate Midget to my cat while I am off so that mom can see her often or if I let my brother take her, which means mom won't see her as often. My brother has so much going on in his life supporting his wife with the loss of her son and his own health issues. Any suggestions on this??? Midget is comfortable with me and she does love me, but can I get my 8 year old kitty to accept her and Midget to accept the cat. Taking Midget away from my mom is definitely going to cause her to decline, I know I can't control that...but I want to make her as comfortable as possible. How I hate these decisions and this disease.
Hey Linda! Good to see you. Hey Hardass thanks for the apology. Hey Mame thanks for the nice post. Hey Everyone!
ok, I have a serious question:
Why is it that when you have your hand on top of the blanket the Cat won't try and kill it but as soon as it is UNDER the blanket the Cat will slice and dice it?
Will check in later. Going out to get some Neosporin.
Diane-Many hugs to you! Thinking of you and praying for you and your family. Wish I could be there to help you or just hug you in person!
Meanwhile, so sorry about your buddy, Kid! The unconditional love we get from animals is like no other! I didn't realize horses lived into their 30's! What a blessing to have such a great friend!
Bobbie, I hope you got through the anniversary of your mom's death with peace. Hugs to you lady! Thank you for all the information you put on this site for us. That menu of misconceptions should be given to anyone thinking about going into caregiving! Altho-had I read that 9 years ago, I never would have believed it! Juju-I love the idea of suggesting the President etc read this site to see what caregiving is really about! I have thought about sending links to certain family members to have them read it!! I have sent the link to a couple friends who are thinking of caring for their parent...not to talk them out of it necessarily-just so they will be aware. Capn-we all have our days-thanks for apologizing for yours! Linda-love your memories! I am sure your mom is talking to you through those hearts! Hey Jen, Sharynmarie, Kuli, Cuz & Cat and everyone else out there! Yea-Deef and Stormy have not been here in a while! Miss you! Welcome-Horserider, Parnelli & Jeanen! Chime in, vent-we'll be here! Mom is good, but much more confused in the morning. We didn't make it to the Dr last week cause the humidity was too high to take her out. Her appt is rescheduled for today & it is nice out. Perfect day to take her out. Later this week it will get more hot and humid! May have to reconsider daycare-but we will try and get there! Our niece got married this weekend and it was lovely! We had a really good time out with my hubby's family. Both my boys made the wedding so it was really special. We danced together and had some good laughs! The mother of the groom saw me at the brunch the next morning and says "There's the dancing machine!" HA! I love to dance-so yes, I was on the dance floor all night! I learned at the last wedding what dance steps to avoid for the sake of my knees-so I could walk the next day! I was remembering back when being an aunt or uncle was new and exciting...now I realize we are the older generation where we are not expected to be dancing all night at weddings! Kind of slapped me in the face this weekend-but a right of passage too. Feeling content about it all today. Continuing saga-Altho my smarmy email on Valentine's night has lost me a friendship with a sister in law-(email was to my brothers not her!) I guess my point was heard about my brothers coming to see or calling mom on holidays! 4 out of 5 brothers showed up here yesterday to visit mom!!! Maybe it wasn't too much to ask?! HA! Some people have to control their spouses to keep their own lives working the way they want them...but I do believe a little reminder that a spouse also has a family of his own that he came from isn't a bad thing. SIL decided it was too much and has cut me off from her (and we were pretty close) but in the end, bro is visiting more. So, I will take the loss for mom's sake cause in the end, this is better for her. :) So, hugs to everyone out there reading! Unofficial start of summer is upon us! Maybe some sun will help us all where we are-physically and psychologically! Hope your week is a decent one! Mame
meanwhile - so sorry that ur horse kid laid down and went to the other side . kid sure lived a good long time and enjoyed life with you for many years . big hugs to u meanwhile . u sure have a big kind heart . love u meanwhile ... flex - extra big hugs to u ... capnhardass - u make me smile . hope ur face is clean free now , maybe water headin for u face be extra nicer than shit .. ure forgivin and big hugs to u . sorry i havent been here for a while now . i am ok . same old shit here , pains and aches . dr upped the antidepresions and it seems to lift my crappy ass moods up some . i am weaning off some pain meds . since dr upped the meds and my body is feeling better and dont need half of those meds anymore . i just dont want to ache anymore . soo sick of it .... my sister in law gave me a necklist with pa s birthstone on it and a heart shape with pa s fingerprint on it ! i told her that heart shape is me ! christina calls me linda hearts and everywhere i go i always spot a heart here there . few yrs ago i saw tons of heart shape in the sand at the beach , and a ice melted and it was a shape of a heart ! it was on moms birthday , so that s telling me mom is sending me messages ,, mom has been gone for 23 yrs now . christina s right i am linda hearts ,,, few weeks ago i was walking and spotted a rock , shape of a heart ! i brought it home and put it in my flower bed . you all take care and please just smile and enjoy life as u can . laugh if ur elders begin a pain in the ass . just be carefree and smile alot . it will make ur job easier . id do it again if my pa s here . my pa would be frowin and groucy , i d smile and tickle him whats wrong pa !! show my teeth and smile as big as i can , hug him and kiss him onthe neck . ohh he loves it , makes him feel he is loved .. i miss my pa . i dont miss the part where he lays in bed daily after daily , too depressing to watch him whilter away . i miss the days where he could crawl in the van and we go bye bye . jam the don williams musci or pasty cline . watch him smile and enjoying the view , drive around and stop at wendys , oh i miss those days . now i know he s even more happier up in heaven . maybe pasty cline is singing to him right now . :-) . love you all !! xoxo
my condolences for the sudden death of one of the members loved one here. my bullshit pales in comparison but i have a need to apologise for getting shitfaced last week and calling the folks on this thread a clique. sorry, i was out of line and ill informed as i havent visited this thread often enough to make that allegation.
Diane, thinking of you. Don't know a what to say. I know it can be so conflicting, relief that it is over, your Mom is no longer in any pain, or has any worries. But, still wishing we had more time, could go back to before they got sick. Try to take care of yourself. You need time to heal. Love Shirley
we have such a battle getting her to eat dinner on her own now but when dessert come she has no problem demolishing that! So last nite I had to give her a hard time about it. I sed fun lovingly "now how can u manage to eat all this cake with no help and you cant manage to eat your dinner, hmmmmmm.....something is fishy here" She just giggled and came back with something like..".oh you know why, cake is good stuff" sometimes the simple stuff just cracks me up, she can be so cute!!! or is my cooking that bad???
Don't have much to say today, just wanted to say Hi!
Oh I was reading about music and its therapeutic values. I need to use this one! I always was the type to enjoy and keep current with music, it was a big part of my life, and my "go to" when down!!!. One of my favorite things to do is watch live music!! Since moving from a big city to li'l country town with ma, music has slowly went by wayside along with other things, couldn't get any radio up here, too much work to download n make playlists for me now and just not many venues/options. I recently discovered and will use Pandora radio thru the computer! Just type a few artist names you like and they pic the similar style music and stream it for you, love it!! So I thought I would work on cleaning up my desk today, I've got a pile of mail and crap to go thru. I am going to need to start dealing with things, need some work space! Taking a (baby) step to resolve this hell should help my mood!
Thanks everyone for being here!!!! love n peace, Juju
Good luck with your play Jen. You're such a gifted writer. I did think of Kid as my friend, companion, buddy, he was a lot like a big dog, If he had been a dog, then he would have been a pet friend, etc. I think people think of horses as still being for working. But, not as many horses have jobs anymore. Kid and I covered a lot of trails, and he seemed to enjoy seeing new places as much as I did.
Bobbie - big hugs to you on the anniversary of your mom's death. I know it gets easier with time but time seems to go so slowly sometimes. Diane - you must get your strength from your mom. Just keep loving her while you can. Love to all ~ Kuli
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Breathe.
You are ok and are not selfish or self absorbed or any of that.
8 years is a long time to be operating in a vacuum but at least it wasn't 10 or 15 or longer. You are here now and we will come up with a lot of stuff some you might use and some you might not. It's all good and you will know what's right for you.
1. The Neurologist.
When I took my mom into see one of these specialists in 06 he stated that the Dementia started presenting maybe 2 years before.
I said no, that's not true. With what I have learned over the past 2 years is that the Dementia has been presenting for over 20 years. He disagreed.
I said: Not too far from now you are going to find that I am right and that some Dementias present decades out. Google it.... they are now talking about early symptoms. Some of which I have. Hopefully it's the pot.
The point is that medicine is an art and they can only do what they can do with what they know. If he doesn't specialize he isn't going to be the smartest guy in the room. He's going to know how to order tests and how to interpret them but the fact remains that this is a progressive disease. This is a dive you are not going to pull out of.
Acceptance of this fact is KEY.
You are living with a Dementia patient and since it is widely known that a Dementia patient can pull more cognitive behavior out of their butts when they are at the doctor, you just need to correct his misconceptions and guide him to a better conclusion. Just like you did when you told him that you had read up on it and were going to become more proactive.
With my mom I kept her on the Namenda and Aricept untill a week before she died. As long as she had no trouble swallowing them I saw that they helped.
Hopefully by the time this generation becomes more symptomatic there will be medicine for earlier stages and I am sure that BigPharma researchers are way more informed about the disease than a GP or MD that is not specializing. No harm, no foul just is the way it is.
The grieving process is brutal because you will grieve before and you will grieve after. You are grieving now and have been since your dad got sick. You are exhausted.
2. We want you to write. We don't care if you write 10 posts in a row. We will read them all. Some will read every word and some will just look for Cuz's jokes. It all works.
When someone has something to say they will and just because you don't see a lot of posts doesn't mean that no one gives a damn. They do.
They are just dealing with their own crazy and it does them some good to know that there are other crazy situations out there with folks that are popping up here to sound off. This is hard work and it would be easier to dig ditches for the over 8 years that you have been doing this.
At least you would have had a day off once a week and would be around other people and someone would have had a birthday and there would have been cake.
3. Yes. You need a lawyer and you need a Power of Attorney (POA) and check the will. That's enough to start with. There's more but it's easy peasy.
It sounds like you live about 2 miles past resume speed so maybe going to the nearest big suburb might find you a better choice of attorneys.
It took 2 shots to get mom's papers right but you will get that done and it will make things easier for you.
4. Don't hammer yourself. What, did the house go to hell and there's a mess in the garage? So what. Inch by inch you can do this because now you are getting a plan together and that's the KEY out of the mess.
5. You are putting your sentences together just fine since we all know wtf you are talking about. Well done.
OK, I have to run off the boat and readjust these fenders. This thing is moaning and squeaking. Will check in later.
You're going to be OK Juju.
I am posting this without proofing it so if the'res a misteke hoppfuly iz th pt.
lovbob
I think maybe I should get a elder care lawyer next cause I really don't know what to do!!! tooo much has gone toooo far is my fear!! I need some professionals :0)!
Again this area is not the greatest resources, can one find an online or long distance attorney, who specializes in this??? anyone??
Thanks for listening!!!! love to you all!!! Juju
I have determined minimal work should go into the home as if something happens we will lose it so doesn't make sense to fix much rite now anyway! have made that decision so relieves some stressors there...but I digress
I feel glad to have this place to vent but I feel bad that I am so self absorbed. I read and hear these stories and want to say something to try to help someone and am terrible at it! It always turns to me....I apologize for this!!! I don't mean to be selfish! I am still new ranting stage here! I hope when things improve for us I can be more supportive! I always notice hindsight!
Since I locked him in n left for a week he Has been a homebody, crawling all over me, in my face, slept next to my head several nights, hasn't done that in 10ys. Its kinda sweet to have him back!!! Actaully Petuyeeehe rubbing his face on mine nose to nose while im trying to type this got hair stuck to my lips now, ughhhh....
Thank goodness he does most of his hunting outdoors my extremities are safe!
Love to you all! hanging in here! smiling again today! not much getting done lil bit here n there but lil is better than none, today I will be busy tho....
How are you all doing? It is rainy day here, has been cloudy n showering since the weekend. Yesterday was roasting tho, crazy weather here, we call it "Bipolar" climate, hahaha.... That is Southern Oregon Living tho, what makes it green n pretty. Long cool wet winters are brutal tho when it comes to keeping spirits up! Oct-May but spring does give us nice breaks like yesterday often!
Took ma to the neurologist yesterday for first time...I have been reporting fainting spells for years to her DR and he never sez much about them. I insisted on finding out more about them recently so they sent me to him.
He was almost rude to me at first, saying why she hear now, it's too late to help her dementia. When I sed it was for fainting but also what role do you play in the dementia. he sed well if I am involved early enough I can help her but not much now. He also said her Namenda and Aricept will no longer be of use shortly and would discontinue them. he sed on the scale 0-30 she bout a 12 at 10 he would stop meds. I think I heard her 5 years ago say she was an 18..
Anyway I have been taking her to a dr regularly for 8 years who never even mentioned a neurology workup or any other treatment path than meds. I explained this and I was ignorant and had just followed dr's leads and recently found AC and AA website and have read and learned a lot about disease and realize it is up to me to become aggressive/proactive and learn as much as I can now, I know it late but!!! His demeanor changed he was very helpful after that! I do like him, so anyway he is ordering test and catscan n eeg (I think, have to double check my notes) for fainting spells. Not sure what we will do with the info next visit should be more informative, I will def have lots of questions for him.
So what do you all know about nuerologist role and what he sed bout her meds??
Ok Love n blessings!
Juju
So I am in awe of you...for rescuing an owl. Because I have a thing for Owls... love them. Blessings all...g'night
Sorry to go on. Love to all, Cat.
Cats are a wicked group. I had one that use to love to lay in bed with me while I read at night. When we got our Sheltie, Kate, (just a baby) she needed to be on the bed too. The cat would look at her and Kate would start to sweat, in a figurative way of speech, then the cat would leap, throw her arms around Kate's neck and chew on her eyebrow. Kate would stay absolutely still with her eyes wide. Once "Precious" released her grip, Kate would spring off the bed and just run and run, then back up she would come. Just had to get all that anxiety out. Of course, the cat would be above it all, just calmly waiting for the dog to come back and do it all over again.
And there is nothing like a hand under the blanket to get a cat it kill mode. Hope you are healing, Bobbie.
You've nailed boat time haven't you? Any post that ends with 00...
You sure do post enough and when folks hang out for awhile it's great. Some will hang out and then lurk for months and months and then post again and some just move on to another space in time and some come in and out and we are here with the light on.
It's all good but please know that we would consider you and any like minded more than twice poster old or new a friend.
And, I went to a Dodgers game in LA and there's more action watching dough rise.
I had more fun watching the guy I was with eat 5 Dodger Dogs.
OK, midge the dog. and clawshank the cat.
can you do a test run and see if they have a shot at it?
If you are saying that you like the dog and the dog likes you and you know the cat is going to hate anything that has 4 legs so how about a test run and make sure you have a big spray container of water.
You might not even need it and the cat always heads for high ground when things go south..
Video tape it and post it to youtube. Oh please.
lovbob
Bobbie~What fun is there in a visible hand as to one that is moving under the covers, LOL!!! Sorry you got sliced and diced :=( !
CapnHardass~You are not the first to have that impression, but glad you realized it was wrong. These ladies and gents have been posting to each other for a long time and as a result, they have developed a real friendship with each other. I don't post often enough to develop that friendship but I do respect it.
As you know, I am out on FMLA for 4 weeks. Today I have lunch with mom, did all the usual stuff with her...a shower and shampoo, change the sheets, gather up all her dirty laundry so I can do it at home. We walked the dog...however, poor Midget (mom's poodle) is not adjusting to assisted living. She left in the apartment from 8:30-6pm alone. Although the aides are walking her throughout the day, Midget is having accidents in the apartment. I bought a potty patch but honestly, I don't have the time to train her to use it and even if I did, how can I get mom to pick up the potty patch using both hands on each end of it so that pee does not dribble out on the carpet and place it on the balcony during the day??? The community is doing everything they can on their end as I am, but lets face it, they are not dog sitters. Alas, I think we are going to have to remove Midget. There is an opening in the memory care unit which will make it easier for the aides to access Midget and it costs less to have mom living there than in assisted living even though she is adjusting. It looks like we are going to move mom to the memory care unit, however, they will only give Midget 2 weeks to adjust. I am debating whether I want to try to acclimate Midget to my cat while I am off so that mom can see her often or if I let my brother take her, which means mom won't see her as often. My brother has so much going on in his life supporting his wife with the loss of her son and his own health issues. Any suggestions on this??? Midget is comfortable with me and she does love me, but can I get my 8 year old kitty to accept her and Midget to accept the cat. Taking Midget away from my mom is definitely going to cause her to decline, I know I can't control that...but I want to make her as comfortable as possible. How I hate these decisions and this disease.
Hey Hardass thanks for the apology.
Hey Mame thanks for the nice post.
Hey Everyone!
ok, I have a serious question:
Why is it that when you have your hand on top of the blanket the Cat won't try and kill it but as soon as it is UNDER the blanket the Cat will slice and dice it?
Will check in later. Going out to get some Neosporin.
lovbob
Wish I could be there to help you or just hug you in person!
Meanwhile, so sorry about your buddy, Kid! The unconditional love we get from animals is like no other! I didn't realize horses lived into their 30's! What a blessing to have such a great friend!
Bobbie, I hope you got through the anniversary of your mom's death with peace. Hugs to you lady! Thank you for all the information you put on this site for us. That menu of misconceptions should be given to anyone thinking about going into caregiving! Altho-had I read that 9 years ago, I never would have believed it!
Juju-I love the idea of suggesting the President etc read this site to see what caregiving is really about! I have thought about sending links to certain family members to have them read it!! I have sent the link to a couple friends who are thinking of caring for their parent...not to talk them out of it necessarily-just so they will be aware.
Capn-we all have our days-thanks for apologizing for yours!
Linda-love your memories! I am sure your mom is talking to you through those hearts!
Hey Jen, Sharynmarie, Kuli, Cuz & Cat and everyone else out there! Yea-Deef and Stormy have not been here in a while! Miss you!
Welcome-Horserider, Parnelli & Jeanen! Chime in, vent-we'll be here!
Mom is good, but much more confused in the morning. We didn't make it to the Dr last week cause the humidity was too high to take her out. Her appt is rescheduled for today & it is nice out. Perfect day to take her out. Later this week it will get more hot and humid! May have to reconsider daycare-but we will try and get there!
Our niece got married this weekend and it was lovely! We had a really good time out with my hubby's family. Both my boys made the wedding so it was really special. We danced together and had some good laughs! The mother of the groom saw me at the brunch the next morning and says "There's the dancing machine!" HA! I love to dance-so yes, I was on the dance floor all night! I learned at the last wedding what dance steps to avoid for the sake of my knees-so I could walk the next day! I was remembering back when being an aunt or uncle was new and exciting...now I realize we are the older generation where we are not expected to be dancing all night at weddings! Kind of slapped me in the face this weekend-but a right of passage too. Feeling content about it all today.
Continuing saga-Altho my smarmy email on Valentine's night has lost me a friendship with a sister in law-(email was to my brothers not her!) I guess my point was heard about my brothers coming to see or calling mom on holidays! 4 out of 5 brothers showed up here yesterday to visit mom!!! Maybe it wasn't too much to ask?! HA! Some people have to control their spouses to keep their own lives working the way they want them...but I do believe a little reminder that a spouse also has a family of his own that he came from isn't a bad thing. SIL decided it was too much and has cut me off from her (and we were pretty close) but in the end, bro is visiting more. So, I will take the loss for mom's sake cause in the end, this is better for her. :)
So, hugs to everyone out there reading! Unofficial start of summer is upon us! Maybe some sun will help us all where we are-physically and psychologically! Hope your week is a decent one! Mame
flex - extra big hugs to u ...
capnhardass - u make me smile . hope ur face is clean free now , maybe water headin for u face be extra nicer than shit .. ure forgivin and big hugs to u .
sorry i havent been here for a while now . i am ok . same old shit here , pains and aches . dr upped the antidepresions and it seems to lift my crappy ass moods up some . i am weaning off some pain meds . since dr upped the meds and my body is feeling better and dont need half of those meds anymore . i just dont want to ache anymore . soo sick of it ....
my sister in law gave me a necklist with pa s birthstone on it and a heart shape with pa s fingerprint on it ! i told her that heart shape is me ! christina calls me linda hearts and everywhere i go i always spot a heart here there . few yrs ago i saw tons of heart shape in the sand at the beach , and a ice melted and it was a shape of a heart ! it was on moms birthday , so that s telling me mom is sending me messages ,, mom has been gone for 23 yrs now . christina s right i am linda hearts ,,, few weeks ago i was walking and spotted a rock , shape of a heart ! i brought it home and put it in my flower bed .
you all take care and please just smile and enjoy life as u can . laugh if ur elders begin a pain in the ass . just be carefree and smile alot . it will make ur job easier . id do it again if my pa s here . my pa would be frowin and groucy , i d smile and tickle him whats wrong pa !! show my teeth and smile as big as i can , hug him and kiss him onthe neck . ohh he loves it , makes him feel he is loved .. i miss my pa . i dont miss the part where he lays in bed daily after daily , too depressing to watch him whilter away . i miss the days where he could crawl in the van and we go bye bye . jam the don williams musci or pasty cline . watch him smile and enjoying the view , drive around and stop at wendys , oh i miss those days . now i know he s even more happier up in heaven . maybe pasty cline is singing to him right now . :-) .
love you all !! xoxo
luvCuz
Jen: Good luck with the play.
Juju: Don't forget to breathe. Deep breaths. One baby step at a time on clean up and organization. Pick one task and get it done. Hugs.
She just giggled and came back with something like..".oh you know why, cake is good stuff" sometimes the simple stuff just cracks me up, she can be so cute!!! or is my cooking that bad???
Oh I was reading about music and its therapeutic values. I need to use this one! I always was the type to enjoy and keep current with music, it was a big part of my life, and my "go to" when down!!!. One of my favorite things to do is watch live music!! Since moving from a big city to li'l country town with ma, music has slowly went by wayside along with other things, couldn't get any radio up here, too much work to download n make playlists for me now and just not many venues/options. I recently discovered and will use Pandora radio thru the computer! Just type a few artist names you like and they pic the similar style music and stream it for you, love it!!
So I thought I would work on cleaning up my desk today, I've got a pile of mail and crap to go thru. I am going to need to start dealing with things, need some work space! Taking a (baby) step to resolve this hell should help my mood!
Thanks everyone for being here!!!!
love n peace,
Juju
I just woke up to a text from Diane time stamped 5:44am:
Mom passed away a few minutes ago.
She just now texted that hospice is there doing the medical/legal stuff.
lovbob
I did think of Kid as my friend, companion, buddy, he was a lot like a big dog, If he had been a dog, then he would have been a pet friend, etc. I think people think of horses as still being for working. But, not as many horses have jobs anymore. Kid and I covered a lot of trails, and he seemed to enjoy seeing new places as much as I did.