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Jen I know what you are going thru. I broke mine at the steel shop where I used to work. Had a cast on for two months. That was 20 yrs ago and to this day I can tell ya when the weather is about to change but I don't get paid for the weather forcast. Hang in there hugs to ya. lovCuz
Judy, consider yourself lucky for you son just saved you tons of money. You can call him now, putty-gun-terminator. ; ) I guess it is the heat for we have the ants n flying roaches.
Cattail, no harm done here for I know I forget a lot of people sometimes for u can get caught up all night reading post n responding here. I am glad that Hospice is helping by checking on your dad for his best care. Glad to hear u got a lot of rain too. Yesterday, I notice a sore throat n today I have very sore throat. Been gargling with warm salty water but it seems to make it burn n it feels better when I have something cool to drink in back of my throat. i just sneezed n that hurt the freaking throat. I think I have become a wussling weakling. I recall now that both of my brothers was getting a scratchy sore throat as well n I think we may have pick up something running back/forth to hospital visiting both parents. I use the hand sanitizser in between each visit with the parents so we wouldn't transfer anything back/forth between them too as well as us. also used it n elvator n upon leaving hospital so go figure. Now I will have to make sure mnl don't get it from me. How can u tell if they might have a bladder infection? I cannot catch to peak at her urine for she already flushy it before I can get their n forgets when I ask her let me see. she only complain once and her eating has not been the same since I left to Fl. all I can get out of her is that she is so glad I am back. If I try to get her to eat rest of her meal she gets very agitated easily too.
Darn, I hit the submit key before I was done. Dflex, sorry that you didn't get to have your and did I hear u right, a pimento cheese burger? At least u got to use the gift cards for they sometimes have an expiration date.
Jsomebody, in summer time I enjoy sleeping in cool air n covering up with the covers. Of course we cover the mnl vents half way so she don't get too cool.
Jsomebody, sorry to hear about your ankle. It seems when it rains it pours for all of us. I say go for the the bolt of lightining n hope it quick n done. That the way I felt last wk. Oh damn I'm bad, for bobbie just mention to Not get struck n write. Writing does seem to help and a bit safer too. ; )
Bobbie, cattails, Jody, Dflex....well It'd be a one legged dance if he croaks today any how Meanwhile...but I'd take it. Thank you all for the support and hugs and tears I am alive...last pain pill yesterday and seem to be doing OK. just gonna be a long heal haul I guess....and moms back to doing most things herself, and it will (if this is possible) just make her more mad...Nothing to do about it....Just hanging in there. could not sleep on lumpy hide a bed in hot living room, slept this morning in moms room with the ac on...nice to be so cold i needed a blanket... Weekend due to be cooler, maybe even rain, that will help...
I hope everyone is having an OK weekend. Just moment by moment here now. Literally....I just can't think of much else...
Bobbi, I think I know how you feel about Boat Angel. I have Indio, who is a blessing. But, he is a diabetic, who only marginally takes care of himself. He is on disability because of a back injury. My family thinks I'm headed for a wreck, and they are right. But, he is just so darn sweet. He even remembers stuff like birthday's and Valentines day. He helped me take care of my husband, when no one else was around. He even helped me take care of Omaha, the horse that got bit by a mountain lion. It isn't just me, he is always helping people. I have always thought he was a wonderful person. Then 3 months after my husband died, he told me he had feelings for me, and that he would wait for me as long as it took. Could have knocked me over with a feather. He isn't tall or handsome, (he is dark though), and I just adore him. I know I'm setting myself up for another broken heart, but can't help it. Cat maybe you need to come hit me upside the head with that 2X4. Diane, hope that medicaid bed comes through for your Mom real soon. And just tell that boyfriend of yours what you want from him. Sometimes men are dense. Jen so sorry about your ankle. Take care, it will get better. You don't want to get hit by lightening, you want to be around when old FP takes that last breath. Then you can go dance on his grave. Hope everyone has a nice Sunday, tomorrow. Sis and I are going to be canning peaches. The peach trees are just loaded this year. We put up over 100 quarts of peaches last year. Shooting for 150 this year.
Cat that is great that you worked so hard to get the mattress to the NH and am glad they will get him what he needs waiting for a bedsore to happen before taking perventive action is so bogus and glad you found someone to give the equitment-I never was able to find anyone to take the equitment my husband had used -maybe I will put a note up at the senior center. Bobbie it is no cooler here in the lower Hudson Valley-our summers have gotten hotter as years go by-at least I will not have to mow lawns for a while-can't wait to get to Maine and the ocean brezzes.
Lildeb: Didn't mean to leave you out. My heart is always with you and I am hoping the best for your dad and step mom. I'm shocked at how young they are for be in such terrible condition. Sending you lots of love and prayers for the best possible outcome. Hugs, Cattails
Logged on this morning and saw "that crazy woman" picture of Diane's. Instantly made me lol. Thanks Diane!!!! Sorry your pimento burger wasn't on the menu and James didn't get you a card. Men can be very thoughtful at times and really miss the mark at other times. It's part of their DNA. You can talk to them about their oversights, but it just takes so much time. 2x4 is much faster approach. I hope your care giver showed.
Jen: Bless you!!!! I am so sorry this happened to you. I am sending you hugs and some tears of my own for your ankle. I give you high marks for jumping in the lake; score of 10 on that spontaneous act of joy. For that moment you were set free. I wish you could have enjoyed it longer and without injury, My brother-in-law did almost the exact same thing many years ago on a family outing. He, his wife and children got to the lake, he jumped in, they fished him out, packed up and took him to ER with a broken ankle. This shit happens, but I sure wish it hadn't happened to you. I'm really sorry Jen. Keep your stories written down. Chapter 7, Go Jump In The Lake. Can't wait for the chapter, "Fart Pants Kicks The Bucket." Stay strong, Jen.
Bobbie: I love when you post and tell us what's really going on in your life. I understand your fears, but take the happy moments when you can with Boat Angel. I think the happiness he experienced with you on the boat did his spirit much more good than the negative of too much chicken. Keep posting and talking and venting and loving.
Judy: Yikes on the scorpions. Every year we get these big fat flying black ants which are about an inch long. Only lasts for a few days, but they swarm and look for nesting places. They are harmless, but creepy. One got in the house and reached my big toe. In a surprised knee jerk reaction, I managed to break my glasses and bruise my arm all in about 5 seconds time. I felt amazingly stupid. Thank God, I was NOT equipped with my trusty 2 x 4 at the time. My family room would have been destroyed. So I do feel qualified to join in with the 3 stooges activity at your place. Sorry about Fang and the chaos. Hope things settle down to a roar.
Well, we had some amazing weather for the PNW. Almost 24 hours of thunder and lightning settled over us. The rain poured down. It was quite a show and hasn't happened here in over 30 years.
I had hauled my dad's mattress to the NH the other day, along with the pressurized mattress topper that Hospice had loaned up. They told me my dad could still use it. The problem with the NH is that a pressurized bed that protects the skin from breaking down is not billable under Medicaid or Medicare unless the patient has bed sores. My feeling is an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure so I always made sure dad had the best here. After hauling everything down and setting up his bed the way I want it, the GM came in and told me that he would get my dad the pressurized mattress and they would take care of the excess costs. NICE!!!! That makes me really happy because my dad will get a great bed and I will donate his mattress to Hospice and return their pressurized mattress topper back to them for someone else to use.
Hospice has been so kind to us. They are going to visit him every month at the NH and check him over. Just another set on eyes on the job. I really appreciate that.
Take care everyone. Sending you lots of love and hugs.
Ugh. Sorry, Diane. I guess I was typing while you posted and I didn't get to see that Fatz wasn't all you had hoped it would be. At least I got a ding dong with a candle in it for my cake! Isn't it odd that sometimes Prince Charming can be a bit of a troll? A home made card would've been nice. I guess he woke up under a bridge yesterday. They all do, I think.
Yesterday started with a scorpion way up on the vaulted ceiling. I'm calling the bug service and we're going to have a serious talk about this invasion. I swear, they must be throwing bait out for them and not poison or whatever it is they're supposed to be doing. I'll take agent orange or a small nuking at this point, which is a complete 360 from how I used to feel. I ask my son to get the ladder and maybe the vacuum cleaner hose to suck that thing up. No. That's too reasonable. He gets a paintball gun, loads it with a glob of putty, wrapped in a paper napkin. I think we're in for some 3 stooges action here with holes in the ceiling, stuff breaking and stinging scorpions falling down people's pants, but he aims, fires, and a dead scorpion lands on the floor. Nice. Took Mom to the oral surgeon at noon, all set to get the fang removed. Its got to be so nasty to have a broken tooth with sharp egdes still intact. The oral surgeon looks at it, charges her $80 for that 30 second look and tells us to come back next week. She was upset. I was livid. This wasn't what we were told or what we expected - she's already been seen. Now, we wait another week. My daughter flies out this afternoon. At least the short appointment yesterday meant that I got home by 3:30, and we could shop and bring some Greek take out home for dinner for her brothers too. And, if I look on the bright side, I won't be at my parents' till after the airport today, so another short day. Jen - OMG. Nightmare at the lake. I'm so sorry. I wish we all lived closer and could help each other out. Never heard of Fatz. Gonna have to look that one up. I hope it was fun, Flex! Bobbie - I'm so glad you got the a/c fixed and spent some time with Boat Angel. I wish I could have been around for the history on that name. Gotta run. Kid has football fundraiser to go to but, as usual, I have no information on it - can't find paper with times and lost the stupid discount cards we're supposed to sell. I guess I write a check for the loss and hope the little nerd can get the details from a buddy. I'm always a day late and a dollar short. Well, usually a few thousand dollars short. Hope its a good weekend for everyone!
Jen, I am so sorry your long desired trip to the lake turned out to be more misery. It should have been a nice surprise and it turned out with you getting hurt. Maybe mom will appreciate you more after she realises how much help you really are. I know it feels like you are waiting for one more calamity, but as hard as it is to comprehend, this too shall pass.
Thanks for all the birthday wishes. Took mom and b/f to Fatz to celebrate birthday on the asshole sibs dime (gave us the gift card at xmas). I couldn't have my pimento cheese burger since they took it off the menu :(. I came home to find a card from my brother with $60 inside. It will go to paying off some of mom's extra care from February. I really don't want to accept it, but I just don't feel like dealing with the backlash. As wonderful as my b/f is everyday, he didn't do a thing for my birthday. I know money is very tight, but he didn't even give me a card (he could have made on on the computer) or even a cupcake. Why are they good men but such insensitive clods at times?
Bobbie, you write all you want. We all love to hear from you. Cat, you better not disappear from this thread! I hope your dad will get settled quickly with familiar faces around him.
I'm waiting for a replacement caregiver to show up this morning. I was supposed to have someone at 9am, but nothing yet. Talk about throwing you day off.
Well, I've bitched enough for now. Let me see if I can get dressed and hopefully have a caregiver here soon. I need to go to work for a few hours since I need the money!!!!
Just got back from dropping the Boat Angel off so he can get dialysis and have no idea when I will see him again but at least he will be where he is well cared for.
lildeb, ya thanks for saying that. I actually love it when I see one of us write a book in a post because those are the posts that give us insight into their lives and when I read someone else's trials and tribulations it ALWAYS puts my issues into perspective. For instance what's going on with Jen: JEN!!! omg what a story! I hope you are not in tremendous pain from your ankle, I know you are in tremendous pain from your situation. Also hope your mom doesn't lose her mind and tries to keep it all in perspective. Easier stated that done but I can hope on your behalf. OK, this is weird and I know you have a broken ankle and a shitty situation but I have to tell you, the way you write about it all is very entertaining. Jen, please remember what Mae West said: If you keep a diary, one day it will keep you. So don't get struck by lightning please, just write write write and one day there will be many pages to edit and then there will be the Story of Jen: A Slice of A Life.
Going back to sleep for a little bit. Went to bed late and had to get up early and it has been so hot there's been no good rest for a long time. At least now with the AC working the boat is very comfortable and the sleeping is great. Thank you Boat Angel.
OK, everybody do as well as possible and Flex, I hope you and your House Angel and mom had a good time at Fatz for your birthday and Austin!! how's it going in upstate NY? Hot and humid? How far north do I have to go to escape this ridiculous heat? Of course it would take the Trawler 3 weeks to make it and by that time it would be the season to head south haha.
Cuz! please give my love to my little cousin Diane and Mike and to your mom, my Aunt H.
Linda and Deef and Miz and Christine and Rip and and and I hope you guys are doing well and miss you.
Lets see. Monday was a planned trip to bank and then credit union to shift yet more of Daaaaaadies money. No big deal, we all went mom feeling wiped out I wanted to be there. so we go we go to other bank and then mom says..."Why don't we drive to the lake."
OK out of left Field here. WAY! I had wanted to just go to the lake for over twenty years now!!!!! Asking leading questions now and then how far is Liberty Lake, would the bus get any where near the public beach etc... I had GIVEN UP on the whole idea when she started commenting about my taking a bus there. some Oh let me check: approximately 30 miles. Not including how the Hell I'd get to the public beach on the other side....Anyhow like I said I gave up on it, then she says this at 10 AM that Monday as we leave the bank..A: We do not just go ANYWHERE any more because fp can't be just taken any where, you have to PLAN! B. We HAD NO PLAN. C I had no idea. but fine! I wasn't gonna miss a chance to go. She really thought i would just LOOK at the damn lake too I believe..Well be better if i had. After getting lost, she had not been there since like I don't know and we took wrong roads drove a ll over, saw buffalo and big horn sheep and Idaho and then got back to how to start on way into lake and after about another 20 minutes I saw water for the first time in 6 years. GOD! water sign here people it's important. Anyhow, we got to the side road down to the county beach. and yes...you have to pay to get in now. No, hadn't considered that either but then NOTHING was considered. Hell fp didn't even want to go. He grumbled I was suprized she didn't just turn around and drive home.. So, we are there, it is getting hot as sun comes on...so far as I can see there are no walks the wheelchair can access, so I go down and ask if we can drive the van down and take him out yes, but, not leave the car. Great great moms pissed it is like a quarter a mile on uneven ground we haul his ass down to picnic area some 20 yards from the beach area. What the hell ever I leave them there at the bench and walk to the water see a dock ask the life guard if the dock is part of the beach and if we can use it. Yes, "Don't worry I can swim.." I said what I clearly c\van not do it gauge the depth of water and space I will need to jump in SPLASH!!!!!
Mind you, this is me, a short crazy 350 pound woman in a summer dress (which I later found was ruined by this ordeal) who stopped only to take of her shoes and glasses and jumped in.
Yes, I jumped in and set the pattern of the next two moths of my life...And yes luckily, it was the same ankle NO REALLY that I broke on the ice January 2010.
Good God. What else really??? things just NOT going good enough here?! I guess not. Anyhow...getting my ass OFF the beach took some doing, using grandads wheelchair, a good, a VERY good Samaritan, an umbrella, my mom and me kicking with one good leg, backward UP the beach UP the hills Up to the van, she now drove down to where we were to drive down before....Shoved me ass in the back of the van Thanked the very kind man who pulled my ass up the hill..God where do these people come from and why are there not more of them?...Oh the lifeguard gave me a packet of Aspirin..Oh just go away ! Rode in the back of the van crying wondering how to open the back of the van to tumble out onto the freeway so I can just die! Back to town....half way and then mom asks...of course she asks..."Jennifer, do you want to go home or do you want me to take you to the ER?"....I should have jumped out of the back of the van on the freeway.....
"the ER..." I mumble, still crying...wondering if I threaten suicide will the commit me? TO Er mom takes fp out for lunch as HAD been the original plan as it was her birthday...so they have burgers and I sit in the ER for four hours in racking pain and just wonder what more misery this rotten life will have in store for me before the blessed day I die...
Three x rays confirm the break, NOT the original bone, new one, but same leg so I can use the old brace. A lucky save of $500.00 bucks there. Though the co pay is $90.00 and god knows what the bill dr bill orthopedic bill will be. another $600.00 I do not have...Oh and the lake fee....It was $2.00 a head, We paid six bucks so I could break my ankle. Oh and nineteen for the what ever it was narcotics, down to last one and think, I can manage the pain without from now on... So mom is now literally DOING EVERYTHING HERSELF, Whereas before, she just acted like she was DOING EVERYTHING HERSELF . She does all the laundry all the dishes all the clean up and the toilet seat gets way dirty because she didn't clean it like I did...On the Hour....
fart pants is mentally going a bit more now which adds to her burden. He rolled out and STARED AT ME IN THE HIDE-A-BED FROM WHERE I CAN NOT ESCAPE... I have to listen to him tell at the TV groan and bitch at the newspaper moan and crab in general and am THIS CLOSE to yelling "Will you shut the fuck up you stupid perverted fucking bastard!!!" I mean THIS CLOSE like I am losing my mind......
But it is Friday and the pain is less, the pain in my leg of course not the rest of it. and now My birthday comes in a week and i fully expect either my 13 year old pug will die from the heat, I will be struck by lightening or the water heater will break. it seems to be going like that...
I am going for there lighting myself...If You don't hear back from me well there ya go eh.....
I think I missed some scuttle butt here, but glad who or whom ever Sylvester is he can piss off, we got enough grief here truly1
Glad to here your boat angle is below deck hope he stops being below par soon...nausea ewk
How are things Diane? You sound better today....
Cat, I feel for you, and the move to place your father, even though I'd be happy if grandpa went into a home, I do know my mom would feel guilty and terrible about it but think of it as HIS move, an issue of safety and care that is right there for emergencies and such and you can always go be with him so he is not alone. But it still will make you feel rotten now and then, but making hard decisions for care is Not abandonment..And if our charges had all their wits they'd understand this....
i will now try and I don't know x plain my wonderful Monday!
Bob, the last post I done was like a book so post away n don't shut up for that is what cyber family is all about. Loving, careing, helping n listening.
Thanks everyone for being happy for the Boat Angel and me. He just went below again to lay down and I think he ate too much because I got a rotisserie chicken from WinnDixie and he went nuts. Now he's urpy. Ya, way to go bobbie. I didn't know what to do because he asked for it so I gave it to him. That's why I was happy he was at the clinic because he could only get what they gave and here he hounds until he gets what he wants and then, well... I'm scared he'll get sick and come out of remission. can't win.
Flex! sounds like a party at Fatz! I love it and you are doing great with all of your ducks you are getting in a row. So glad James is there with you and yes, your siblings are idiots. Selfish idiots. Where's that finger when we need it for your sibs?
Cattails glad today was better for you and your dad and he was happy at the new place. Be real thankful for that. My mom sat and cried and it broke my heart and I went every day for a few days and then took a day off and she was so angry with me. I know she was just scared and lonely but that was when I was almost dead with high BP plus I was flying back and forth from LA to Philly to handle her business and couldn't leave her alone and couldn't take her with me. What a nightmare and it still gives me the vapors. So, Cat, I am beyond pleased for you in that your dad is safe and your soul has had some good medicine. Thought I'd say vapors to go along with Birthday Flex's vintage picture.
lildeb, good to see you and you have some great ideas for managing!
Meanwhile thanks for that very true statement. So glad for you that you have your very special friend to go and sing with and bbq and just hang out. It really makes a difference. I almost am afraid of getting too close to the Boat Angel again for fear that I will come to depend on him again and then it will all go away again. Stupid I am sure and way stupid with what everyone else is dealing with so I will shut up about it.
I will take him back to the clinic tomorrow morning very early so he can get his dialysis. I finally saw where the little shunt is on the side of his belly and I had to fight to not cry. It all is what it is and we all suffer what we suffer. The doctor says that he can be clear of dialysis in a few weeks and if he is still in remission we might be able to go somewhere. Who knows and I am afraid to think too far ahead. You're so right Meanwhile about the time we have.
I love you guys and thanks again for the love and support. I would surely be dead if it wasn't for the caregivers on this thread taking care of me.
Dflex, as for your electric bill have u checked if their are churches like the Salvation Army that can help you with your utility bills? Explain that your mom relies on the electric for she is on oxygen n if they have the funds they will try to help you if they can. Sometimes they can refer you to other places if they r out of funds. I know it won't cover long-term help but it's worth a shot to keep try to prevent the utility bill getting to high.
Diane: Love the vintage look, but I think the other picture was hysterical. I cracked up every time I saw it. Listen, girlfriend, I don't like that you don't have health insurance. Don't like it at all!! Are you following up on the Medicaid application? I sent mine in on June 12th for my dad and it was approved and he is placed. I never thought it would go that fast, but I do stay in touch with the Social Service Department. Where are you in the process and who is handling it...meaning the attorney you visited or you or what? Tell me what's going on and I'll tell you my experiences. Can't be sure it will help, but can't hurt.
Bobby I am still glowing in your email about Boat Angel. I am so happy for you both.
Meanwhile. You said it all with your post. You are so right and what you said was perfect.
The infamous finger painting has been removed from my wall and Judy's. I agree with Bobbie. It made me howl too. Cracked me up. Or as my granddaughter use to say when she was little, "I just cracked out."
Today was a better day. I spent some time with my dad, got him in his recliner and covered him with his favorite blanket. He was so comfortable and happy. It was just the medicine for my soul.
Bobbie, great news about the Boat Angel! Jen, I'm waiting to find out how you broke that ankle. Thanks to everyone for the wonderful birthday wishes. I don't know what I would do without you guys.
Well I got brave and went into my bosses office today and laid out the situation that until mom is placed in the NH I will only be able to work 20-25 hours a week. My insurance will run through August 1st and then I either have to do COBRA or no insurance. I need to talk to my therapist and see if she can give me a break on the cost or cut down to twice a month. Luckily the generic prozac I can get at Walmart for $4. I have to see about my HBP med since that doesn't have a generic.
Cat, my b/f has been a wonderful house husband. He applies for jobs but doesn't get any response. It might be because he is only cleared by the doctor to work 5 hours a day. He has been denied my Disability and is refiling for Food Stamps. Unemployment still won't pay either. Basically, we are FUBAR'ed. My sibs have their heads so far up their asses they can't see that I am drowning financially. Quite honestly, they don't care. I called the electric company today to tell them mom was on oxygen so they won't turn off the power. I also managed to get excused from jury duty for next week. That means more time for me to work and make something.
I am worried about our future, but right now all I can do is take it one day at a time. For tonight I am using the rest of a restaurant gift card and going to have dinner at Fatz . Mom loves their Calabash Chicken. I may just pig-out on a Pimento Cheese Burger! Maybe I'll go spend a dollar and buy a lotto ticket. Can't hurt at this point.
Have a good evening all. It sure would be nice for all of us to get together and have a grand ole time!
Dflex, Happy birthday to you, hap-py birth-day 2 U, and many many more.... Tell the kin folks to kiss your butt! I hope you get to enjoy your special day. ; )
Oh Bobbie: I was so surprised and happy to hear about the Boat Angel. That is the best news I could have imagined hearing when I checked in on the thread this morning. I am so thrilled he is in remission and able to spend some time with you on the boat. I will be praying for him and thanking God at the same time. Glad your AC is working now. He is truly an angel.
Sending you both lots of love and white light. I'm just so happy to hear he is better. Hugs, Cattails
Diane!! Happy Birthday and you will have Many More! I really wish that we were all together at some point and could have a ginormous party and celebrate everybody's everything.
Some of us used to talk about having a convention and meeting up somewhere and just having a blast. That's what the boat started out to be but I can only sleep 5.
Maybe one day......
I have to admit when I saw the 'bird' on the thread I really howled. Then I read what the backstory was and oh well. Nice answer to that attack Cattails!
Cattails I hope you are feeling ok and I am really impressed by the quality of the facility that you chose. Glad you are going to continue with us because we will all be the richer for it.
Judy, you are one funny so and so. *whew* that waiting room story was priceless.
My mom described in detail her constipation one time at a friend's house. During dinner. Didn't help that dinner was meatloaf.
Big News: the Boat Angel is below asleep. I have to take him back tomorrow for dialysis but bless his heart, I told him that the AC on the boat failed and he told me to come and get him and he got permission to leave the hospital, of mercy's sake, came here, got one of the compressors running (only took him 20 minutes because he knows what he is doing) and then sat with me for an hour or so and then went to bed. I couldn't believe it. Now I am not so heat sick and being able to come into the boat and actually being able to cool off makes all the difference. I'll be able to get more exterior work done. I am floored and grateful and scared for him. I told him don't worry about it, going into the engine room will be too much, etc etc and he said, no I can do this and it will be good for me to be on a boat again. And, he's in remission! The 5 year survival rate is 7 to 14% for what he is dealing with and his kidneys got shot out due to the chemo but right this moment, he is in remission. He told me that going into the hospital was the best thing and I agreed wholeheartedly. I NEVER would have been able to provide that level of care or aftercare for him, driving him back and forth and trying to cook the right stuff etc. And that's not only because I was a mess from my own drama but because I am not a world class clinic staffed with professionals. I am so happy for him and his kids (who still don't know he is fighting for his life) because he's got a shot at this now. The doctor says that his kidneys are getting better and that he should be off dialysis in a month or so. He also has learned his lesson about eating crapola and drinking Cokes and sweet tea and all of that stuff. When he went into remission the first time he just continued on staying in the sun and eating a greasy, sugary diet. That was a big factor for me not being able to care for him because when he was on the boat he would want this and that and I knew it was poison for a cancer patient but he would go one and on until he got what he wanted. Now he's all spring water and vegetables. Better for both of us.
Thank you everybody for all of your continued support and love. I know for a fact that there is no way that I would still be sitting here if it wasn't for the caregivers on this thread. Period. Thank you all more than I could ever express.
OK, out to dig some caulk out so I can reshoot these seams.
Love you guys way more than you'll ever know. lovbob
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lovCuz
Cattail, no harm done here for I know I forget a lot of people sometimes for u can get caught up all night reading post n responding here. I am glad that Hospice is helping by checking on your dad for his best care. Glad to hear u got a lot of rain too.
Yesterday, I notice a sore throat n today I have very sore throat. Been gargling with warm salty water but it seems to make it burn n it feels better when I have something cool to drink in back of my throat. i just sneezed n that hurt the freaking throat. I think I have become a wussling weakling. I recall now that both of my brothers was getting a scratchy sore throat as well n I think we may have pick up something running back/forth to hospital visiting both parents. I use the hand sanitizser in between each visit with the parents so we wouldn't transfer anything back/forth between them too as well as us. also used it n elvator n upon leaving hospital so go figure. Now I will have to make sure mnl don't get it from me. How can u tell if they might have a bladder infection? I cannot catch to peak at her urine for she already flushy it before I can get their n forgets when I ask her let me see. she only complain once and her eating has not been the same since I left to Fl. all I can get out of her is that she is so glad I am back. If I try to get her to eat rest of her meal she gets very agitated easily too.
Dflex, sorry that you didn't get to have your and did I hear u right, a pimento cheese burger? At least u got to use the gift cards for they sometimes have an expiration date.
Jsomebody, in summer time I enjoy sleeping in cool air n covering up with the covers. Of course we cover the mnl vents half way so she don't get too cool.
Weekend due to be cooler, maybe even rain, that will help...
I hope everyone is having an OK weekend. Just moment by moment here now. Literally....I just can't think of much else...
Love and wishes for us all....Jen
Diane, hope that medicaid bed comes through for your Mom real soon. And just tell that boyfriend of yours what you want from him. Sometimes men are dense.
Jen so sorry about your ankle. Take care, it will get better. You don't want to get hit by lightening, you want to be around when old FP takes that last breath. Then you can go dance on his grave.
Hope everyone has a nice Sunday, tomorrow. Sis and I are going to be canning peaches. The peach trees are just loaded this year. We put up over 100 quarts of peaches last year. Shooting for 150 this year.
Logged on this morning and saw "that crazy woman" picture of Diane's. Instantly made me lol. Thanks Diane!!!! Sorry your pimento burger wasn't on the menu and James didn't get you a card. Men can be very thoughtful at times and really miss the mark at other times. It's part of their DNA. You can talk to them about their oversights, but it just takes so much time. 2x4 is much faster approach. I hope your care giver showed.
Jen: Bless you!!!! I am so sorry this happened to you. I am sending you hugs and some tears of my own for your ankle. I give you high marks for jumping in the lake; score of 10 on that spontaneous act of joy. For that moment you were set free. I wish you could have enjoyed it longer and without injury, My brother-in-law did almost the exact same thing many years ago on a family outing. He, his wife and children got to the lake, he jumped in, they fished him out, packed up and took him to ER with a broken ankle. This shit happens, but I sure wish it hadn't happened to you. I'm really sorry Jen. Keep your stories written down. Chapter 7, Go Jump In The Lake. Can't wait for the chapter, "Fart Pants Kicks The Bucket." Stay strong, Jen.
Bobbie: I love when you post and tell us what's really going on in your life. I understand your fears, but take the happy moments when you can with Boat Angel. I think the happiness he experienced with you on the boat did his spirit much more good than the negative of too much chicken. Keep posting and talking and venting and loving.
Judy: Yikes on the scorpions. Every year we get these big fat flying black ants which are about an inch long. Only lasts for a few days, but they swarm and look for nesting places. They are harmless, but creepy. One got in the house and reached my big toe. In a surprised knee jerk reaction, I managed to break my glasses and bruise my arm all in about 5 seconds time. I felt amazingly stupid. Thank God, I was NOT equipped with my trusty 2 x 4 at the time. My family room would have been destroyed. So I do feel qualified to join in with the 3 stooges activity at your place. Sorry about Fang and the chaos. Hope things settle down to a roar.
Well, we had some amazing weather for the PNW. Almost 24 hours of thunder and lightning settled over us. The rain poured down. It was quite a show and hasn't happened here in over 30 years.
I had hauled my dad's mattress to the NH the other day, along with the pressurized mattress topper that Hospice had loaned up. They told me my dad could still use it. The problem with the NH is that a pressurized bed that protects the skin from breaking down is not billable under Medicaid or Medicare unless the patient has bed sores. My feeling is an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure so I always made sure dad had the best here. After hauling everything down and setting up his bed the way I want it, the GM came in and told me that he would get my dad the pressurized mattress and they would take care of the excess costs. NICE!!!! That makes me really happy because my dad will get a great bed and I will donate his mattress to Hospice and return their pressurized mattress topper back to them for someone else to use.
Hospice has been so kind to us. They are going to visit him every month at the NH and check him over. Just another set on eyes on the job. I really appreciate that.
Take care everyone. Sending you lots of love and hugs.
Cattails
Jen - OMG. Nightmare at the lake. I'm so sorry. I wish we all lived closer and could help each other out.
Never heard of Fatz. Gonna have to look that one up. I hope it was fun, Flex!
Bobbie - I'm so glad you got the a/c fixed and spent some time with Boat Angel. I wish I could have been around for the history on that name.
Gotta run. Kid has football fundraiser to go to but, as usual, I have no information on it - can't find paper with times and lost the stupid discount cards we're supposed to sell. I guess I write a check for the loss and hope the little nerd can get the details from a buddy. I'm always a day late and a dollar short. Well, usually a few thousand dollars short. Hope its a good weekend for everyone!
Jen, I am so sorry your long desired trip to the lake turned out to be more misery. It should have been a nice surprise and it turned out with you getting hurt. Maybe mom will appreciate you more after she realises how much help you really are. I know it feels like you are waiting for one more calamity, but as hard as it is to comprehend, this too shall pass.
Thanks for all the birthday wishes. Took mom and b/f to Fatz to celebrate birthday on the asshole sibs dime (gave us the gift card at xmas). I couldn't have my pimento cheese burger since they took it off the menu :(. I came home to find a card from my brother with $60 inside. It will go to paying off some of mom's extra care from February. I really don't want to accept it, but I just don't feel like dealing with the backlash. As wonderful as my b/f is everyday, he didn't do a thing for my birthday. I know money is very tight, but he didn't even give me a card (he could have made on on the computer) or even a cupcake. Why are they good men but such insensitive clods at times?
Bobbie, you write all you want. We all love to hear from you. Cat, you better not disappear from this thread! I hope your dad will get settled quickly with familiar faces around him.
I'm waiting for a replacement caregiver to show up this morning. I was supposed to have someone at 9am, but nothing yet. Talk about throwing you day off.
Well, I've bitched enough for now. Let me see if I can get dressed and hopefully have a caregiver here soon. I need to go to work for a few hours since I need the money!!!!
Have a good day my dear friends!
Love ya,
Diane
Just got back from dropping the Boat Angel off so he can get dialysis and have no idea when I will see him again but at least he will be where he is well cared for.
lildeb, ya thanks for saying that. I actually love it when I see one of us write a book in a post because those are the posts that give us insight into their lives and when I read someone else's trials and tribulations it ALWAYS puts my issues into perspective.
For instance what's going on with Jen:
JEN!!!
omg what a story! I hope you are not in tremendous pain from your ankle, I know you are in tremendous pain from your situation. Also hope your mom doesn't lose her mind and tries to keep it all in perspective. Easier stated that done but I can hope on your behalf.
OK, this is weird and I know you have a broken ankle and a shitty situation but I have to tell you, the way you write about it all is very entertaining.
Jen, please remember what Mae West said:
If you keep a diary, one day it will keep you.
So don't get struck by lightning please, just write write write and one day there will be many pages to edit and then there will be the Story of Jen: A Slice of A Life.
Going back to sleep for a little bit. Went to bed late and had to get up early and it has been so hot there's been no good rest for a long time. At least now with the AC working the boat is very comfortable and the sleeping is great. Thank you Boat Angel.
OK, everybody do as well as possible and Flex, I hope you and your House Angel and mom had a good time at Fatz for your birthday and Austin!! how's it going in upstate NY? Hot and humid? How far north do I have to go to escape this ridiculous heat? Of course it would take the Trawler 3 weeks to make it and by that time it would be the season to head south haha.
Cuz! please give my love to my little cousin Diane and Mike and to your mom, my Aunt H.
Linda and Deef and Miz and Christine and Rip and and and I hope you guys are doing well and miss you.
lovbob
OK out of left Field here. WAY! I had wanted to just go to the lake for over twenty years now!!!!! Asking leading questions now and then how far is Liberty Lake, would the bus get any where near the public beach etc... I had GIVEN UP on the whole idea when she started commenting about my taking a bus there. some Oh let me check: approximately 30 miles. Not including how the Hell I'd get to the public beach on the other side....Anyhow like I said I gave up on it, then she says this at 10 AM that Monday as we leave the bank..A: We do not just go ANYWHERE any more because fp can't be just taken any where, you have to PLAN! B. We HAD NO PLAN. C I had no idea. but fine! I wasn't gonna miss a chance to go. She really thought i would just LOOK at the damn lake too I believe..Well be better if i had. After getting lost, she had not been there since like I don't know and we took wrong roads drove a ll over, saw buffalo and big horn sheep and Idaho and then got back to how to start on way into lake and after about another 20 minutes I saw water for the first time in 6 years. GOD! water sign here people it's important. Anyhow, we got to the side road down to the county beach. and yes...you have to pay to get in now. No, hadn't considered that either but then NOTHING was considered. Hell fp didn't even want to go. He grumbled I was suprized she didn't just turn around and drive home.. So, we are there, it is getting hot as sun comes on...so far as I can see there are no walks the wheelchair can access, so I go down and ask if we can drive the van down and take him out yes, but, not leave the car. Great great moms pissed it is like a quarter a mile on uneven ground we haul his ass down to picnic area some 20 yards from the beach area. What the hell ever I leave them there at the bench and walk to the water see a dock ask the life guard if the dock is part of the beach and if we can use it. Yes, "Don't worry I can swim.." I said what I clearly c\van not do it gauge the depth of water and space I will need to jump in SPLASH!!!!!
Mind you, this is me, a short crazy 350 pound woman in a summer dress (which I later found was ruined by this ordeal) who stopped only to take of her shoes and glasses and jumped in.
Yes, I jumped in and set the pattern of the next two moths of my life...And yes luckily, it was the same ankle NO REALLY that I broke on the ice January 2010.
Good God. What else really??? things just NOT going good enough here?!
I guess not.
Anyhow...getting my ass OFF the beach took some doing, using grandads wheelchair, a good, a VERY good Samaritan, an umbrella, my mom and me kicking with one good leg, backward UP the beach UP the hills Up to the van, she now drove down to where we were to drive down before....Shoved me ass in the back of the van Thanked the very kind man who pulled my ass up the hill..God where do these people come from and why are there not more of them?...Oh the lifeguard gave me a packet of Aspirin..Oh just go away ! Rode in the back of the van crying wondering how to open the back of the van to tumble out onto the freeway so I can just die! Back to town....half way and then mom asks...of course she asks..."Jennifer, do you want to go home or do you want me to take you to the ER?"....I should have jumped out of the back of the van on the freeway.....
"the ER..." I mumble, still crying...wondering if I threaten suicide will the commit me?
TO Er mom takes fp out for lunch as HAD been the original plan as it was her birthday...so they have burgers and I sit in the ER for four hours in racking pain and just wonder what more misery this rotten life will have in store for me before the blessed day I die...
Three x rays confirm the break, NOT the original bone, new one, but same leg so I can use the old brace. A lucky save of $500.00 bucks there. Though the co pay is $90.00 and god knows what the bill dr bill orthopedic bill will be. another $600.00 I do not have...Oh and the lake fee....It was $2.00 a head, We paid six bucks so I could break my ankle. Oh and nineteen for the what ever it was narcotics, down to last one and think, I can manage the pain without from now on...
So mom is now literally DOING EVERYTHING HERSELF, Whereas before, she just acted like she was DOING EVERYTHING HERSELF . She does all the laundry all the dishes all the clean up and the toilet seat gets way dirty because she didn't clean it like I did...On the Hour....
fart pants is mentally going a bit more now which adds to her burden. He rolled out and STARED AT ME IN THE HIDE-A-BED FROM WHERE I CAN NOT ESCAPE... I have to listen to him tell at the TV groan and bitch at the newspaper moan and crab in general and am THIS CLOSE to yelling "Will you shut the fuck up you stupid perverted fucking bastard!!!" I mean THIS CLOSE like I am losing my mind......
But it is Friday and the pain is less, the pain in my leg of course not the rest of it. and now My birthday comes in a week and i fully expect either my 13 year old pug will die from the heat, I will be struck by lightening or the water heater will break. it seems to be going like that...
I am going for there lighting myself...If You don't hear back from me well there ya go eh.....
Good weekend, all how ever you can get it!!!!!
Glad to here your boat angle is below deck hope he stops being below par soon...nausea ewk
How are things Diane? You sound better today....
Cat, I feel for you, and the move to place your father, even though I'd be happy if grandpa went into a home, I do know my mom would feel guilty and terrible about it but think of it as HIS move, an issue of safety and care that is right there for emergencies and such and you can always go be with him so he is not alone. But it still will make you feel rotten now and then, but making hard decisions for care is Not abandonment..And if our charges had all their wits they'd understand this....
i will now try and I don't know x plain my wonderful Monday!
I just read my comment after I posted it and saw that I totally didn't 'shut up about it'
I'm such an idiot.
lovbob
Flex! sounds like a party at Fatz! I love it and you are doing great with all of your ducks you are getting in a row. So glad James is there with you and yes, your siblings are idiots. Selfish idiots. Where's that finger when we need it for your sibs?
Cattails glad today was better for you and your dad and he was happy at the new place. Be real thankful for that. My mom sat and cried and it broke my heart and I went every day for a few days and then took a day off and she was so angry with me. I know she was just scared and lonely but that was when I was almost dead with high BP plus I was flying back and forth from LA to Philly to handle her business and couldn't leave her alone and couldn't take her with me. What a nightmare and it still gives me the vapors.
So, Cat, I am beyond pleased for you in that your dad is safe and your soul has had some good medicine.
Thought I'd say vapors to go along with Birthday Flex's vintage picture.
lildeb, good to see you and you have some great ideas for managing!
Meanwhile thanks for that very true statement. So glad for you that you have your very special friend to go and sing with and bbq and just hang out. It really makes a difference.
I almost am afraid of getting too close to the Boat Angel again for fear that I will come to depend on him again and then it will all go away again. Stupid I am sure and way stupid with what everyone else is dealing with so I will shut up about it.
I will take him back to the clinic tomorrow morning very early so he can get his dialysis. I finally saw where the little shunt is on the side of his belly and I had to fight to not cry.
It all is what it is and we all suffer what we suffer.
The doctor says that he can be clear of dialysis in a few weeks and if he is still in remission we might be able to go somewhere. Who knows and I am afraid to think too far ahead. You're so right Meanwhile about the time we have.
I love you guys and thanks again for the love and support. I would surely be dead if it wasn't for the caregivers on this thread taking care of me.
lovbob
Bobby I am still glowing in your email about Boat Angel. I am so happy for you both.
Meanwhile. You said it all with your post. You are so right and what you said was perfect.
The infamous finger painting has been removed from my wall and Judy's. I agree with Bobbie. It made me howl too. Cracked me up. Or as my granddaughter use to say when she was little, "I just cracked out."
Today was a better day. I spent some time with my dad, got him in his recliner and covered him with his favorite blanket. He was so comfortable and happy. It was just the medicine for my soul.
Love you all, Cattails
Well I got brave and went into my bosses office today and laid out the situation that until mom is placed in the NH I will only be able to work 20-25 hours a week. My insurance will run through August 1st and then I either have to do COBRA or no insurance. I need to talk to my therapist and see if she can give me a break on the cost or cut down to twice a month. Luckily the generic prozac I can get at Walmart for $4. I have to see about my HBP med since that doesn't have a generic.
Cat, my b/f has been a wonderful house husband. He applies for jobs but doesn't get any response. It might be because he is only cleared by the doctor to work 5 hours a day. He has been denied my Disability and is refiling for Food Stamps. Unemployment still won't pay either. Basically, we are FUBAR'ed. My sibs have their heads so far up their asses they can't see that I am drowning financially. Quite honestly, they don't care. I called the electric company today to tell them mom was on oxygen so they won't turn off the power. I also managed to get excused from jury duty for next week. That means more time for me to work and make something.
I am worried about our future, but right now all I can do is take it one day at a time. For tonight I am using the rest of a restaurant gift card and going to have dinner at Fatz . Mom loves their Calabash Chicken. I may just pig-out on a Pimento Cheese Burger! Maybe I'll go spend a dollar and buy a lotto ticket. Can't hurt at this point.
Have a good evening all. It sure would be nice for all of us to get together and have a grand ole time!
Love ya,
Diane
Sending you both lots of love and white light. I'm just so happy to hear he is better. Hugs, Cattails
WTF!?! How bad a break is it? omg.
Diane!! Happy Birthday and you will have Many More! I really wish that we were all together at some point and could have a ginormous party and celebrate everybody's everything.
Some of us used to talk about having a convention and meeting up somewhere and just having a blast. That's what the boat started out to be but I can only sleep 5.
Maybe one day......
I have to admit when I saw the 'bird' on the thread I really howled. Then I read what the backstory was and oh well. Nice answer to that attack Cattails!
Cattails I hope you are feeling ok and I am really impressed by the quality of the facility that you chose. Glad you are going to continue with us because we will all be the richer for it.
Judy, you are one funny so and so. *whew* that waiting room story was priceless.
My mom described in detail her constipation one time at a friend's house. During dinner. Didn't help that dinner was meatloaf.
Big News: the Boat Angel is below asleep. I have to take him back tomorrow for dialysis but bless his heart, I told him that the AC on the boat failed and he told me to come and get him and he got permission to leave the hospital, of mercy's sake, came here, got one of the compressors running (only took him 20 minutes because he knows what he is doing) and then sat with me for an hour or so and then went to bed. I couldn't believe it. Now I am not so heat sick and being able to come into the boat and actually being able to cool off makes all the difference. I'll be able to get more exterior work done.
I am floored and grateful and scared for him. I told him don't worry about it, going into the engine room will be too much, etc etc and he said, no I can do this and it will be good for me to be on a boat again.
And, he's in remission! The 5 year survival rate is 7 to 14% for what he is dealing with and his kidneys got shot out due to the chemo but right this moment, he is in remission.
He told me that going into the hospital was the best thing and I agreed wholeheartedly. I NEVER would have been able to provide that level of care or aftercare for him, driving him back and forth and trying to cook the right stuff etc. And that's not only because I was a mess from my own drama but because I am not a world class clinic staffed with professionals. I am so happy for him and his kids (who still don't know he is fighting for his life) because he's got a shot at this now.
The doctor says that his kidneys are getting better and that he should be off dialysis in a month or so. He also has learned his lesson about eating crapola and drinking Cokes and sweet tea and all of that stuff. When he went into remission the first time he just continued on staying in the sun and eating a greasy, sugary diet. That was a big factor for me not being able to care for him because when he was on the boat he would want this and that and I knew it was poison for a cancer patient but he would go one and on until he got what he wanted. Now he's all spring water and vegetables. Better for both of us.
Thank you everybody for all of your continued support and love. I know for a fact that there is no way that I would still be sitting here if it wasn't for the caregivers on this thread. Period. Thank you all more than I could ever express.
OK, out to dig some caulk out so I can reshoot these seams.
Love you guys way more than you'll ever know.
lovbob
Luv
-SS