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Oh Linda, I am so sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Cuz, and Bee thanks for the advice on my step Dad. I am off work today, and he is going to let me drive him into town. Hopefully, I can just start driving him around.
Linda - I don't even know what to say. I wish I could take some of your burden for you. You and your family will be in my prayers. I'm so very very sorry for your loss. Please don't let yourself fall into the black hole. Your pa needs you with him, beside him, lying next to him, making him feel safe. Love and hugs ~ Kuli
Linda I am so so sorry. How awful for your famly. you all will be on my prayer list. You have had your plate more than full. May God bless you all and comfort you.
swimming in the black hole . got a ph call said my niece was in car accident and died . my sis is staying with dad . hubby and my girls came up to be with em . hearts a broken realy bad , worring about dad and worring about my sis in law and her baby girl . oh lord why ?? whats tmr ? no clue . whats going tohappen in 5 mins ? no clue . hoping and praying that all my love ones are safe , now this tragic things happen , shes only 21 . i will try to ck the puter when i have the time , prayers pls . xoxo
At the National Art Gallery in Warsaw , a husband and wife were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused.
The painting depicted 3 black men totally naked, sitting on a bench.
Two of the figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis.
The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his personal assessment.
He went on for over half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of Africans in America in a predominately white, patriarchal society.
"In fact", he pointed out, "some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society".
After the curator left, an old Jewish gentleman approached the couple and said, "Would you like to know what the painting is really about?"
"Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the gallery?" asked the couple.
"Because I am the artist who painted the picture," he replied... "In fact, there are no Africans depicted at all. They're just three Polish coal miners. The guy in the middle went home for lunch."
Snow is fun, but I am enjoying 70 degree days right now. Still gets chilly at night. Dad had bad news from the eye Doctor. Can't do anything else for his blurry vision. I dread trying to take his car keys. He loves running around in his old van. Does admit he can't drive at night. He already hit the guard rail going over the big hill between here and town. He blamed that on a low blood sugar. So now he checks his glucose before he drives off.
I love to watch the birds outside -this year have woodpeckers and cardnials and bluejays eating the suet/seed cakes-we are getting two snow storms this weekend so will probably be stuck in the house but have plenty of yarn and books and of course food.
Hey Linda! I feel for you with Pa. Been there ... heart just aches & aches. Sir was so appreciative & kind - concerned about me ... sound familar? sniff - moving right along
Yikes! Snowbound on my steep hill. Still snowing here! Glad it isn't ice pellets like this morning. Grateful to still have power. 200K without that luxury. When I was a kid I thought I'd be a great pioneer. Young ideas are wonderful, huh? Watching continual news coverage. Very ugly conditions everywhere in Washington. Rare that the airport is closed - but it is. Freezing rain in many places, trees snapping, vehicles crashing, a couple of weather related deaths.
I feel fortunate to be safe & able to feed the birds. See FB for videos.
stillstanding let me know when ur brownies are done , i ll be right over and help ur dad to eat em :-) . we shall be happy campers then , i sure hope he eats better now . it is normal not to want to eat . losing a love ones is heart breaking . i think i will become a toothpick after all this is over . best keep em brownies comin . lala
flex - ur moms home now , great . i rather have parents at home than at the hospital or nh , i dont worry as much . woried about dad in his bdrm alone is plenty enuff for me .
dad ask me lastnight to lay down with him . so i did , it was nice he closed his eyes and felt safe . i laid there prob a good half hr then he started coughin realy bad , had to get up and give him his breathing treatment . he was fussy afterwards . xannax didnt help . nurse told me today to give him half of activan imnot sure if im speeling that right , hell i cant spell worth shit anymore . my mind just spins and spins . my bro wants to come up here so bad and its over 1000 miles away . i told him i can zoom down and get him and zoom back up here . touched his heart and says not now . all his family is up here and he s feeling alone . he has his wife and sons there with him . but its not the same without his dad . cant be at 2 places at the same time and i know that feeling . i love my brother he is so sweet and kind . rossella - big hugs to u and ur dorthy , shes a purrty girl , hows jsomebody ? missin her too , rip jsomebody are u guys snowed in ? my sis lives up north about 1 and half hr drive . is getting about 3 inches of snow . i got nuthing but flurries ,. what the hell ! she hates snow i love snow . told her to stop begin such a hog !!! heehee ill try to post some more later and need to get back in with dad and see if he s done arugein with me . hes wanting to get up i told him he llhave to wait till sis wakes up cuz im not going to try to get him out of bed alone . last timei did that we both fell on his bed , whew ! it was kinda funny tho . i laugh and laugh dad s eyes were so big !! blew him away lalala .
mariesmom !!! see told u something betters coming at your way whooo hoo and sure is better . love ur new place ! damn we re just 2 states away from eachother yippy , thyank you jesus for finding a better path for maries mom and a good job for her hubby . amen in the name of jesus whoo hoo . love u mariesmom ! meow at you all later . xoxo
Those meals might get him interested in eating again-they do usually tast good-do they have meals on wheels he could get once in a while. One of my Mom's meds interfered with her eating after changeing the time of the day she took it she was able to eat again. Carnation Instant Breakfast is the same as Ensure you just have to add the milk and is so much less expensive our hospital started using it after I told them about it.
Barb I am so happy to hear such good news! It's really exciting. The good news of someone are like a sunbeam in the lives of everyone. Carolyn, I see that there is some mess around your mother but at least something is moving. Very soon a routine will be established - you know, at the beginning nobody really knows what to do and what the situation is, but after a while everything takes shape. It took months for me to "stabilize" my mother, to understand how much and what she had to eat, which pills she had to take and at what dosage... How to behave with her... It took a while but everything works quite well now. It's a beginning for your mom.... As far as food is concerned, as long as she doesn't eat rotten food or she takes it in and out of the freezer, there shoudn't be problems! Diane, try to have some rest. Big kiss to everyone.
Hey, I save $1.00 on each because dad found Equate! I had to find something for him to eat .Although I cook every night; full course meals, he just picks... So, I went to the commissary and bought alot of frozen dinners, which I don't care for, and when I asked him what he felt like eating, as usual he said, "Oh, I'm not really hungry'", iI nailed him!!! I went to the freezer, pulled out about eight or so dinners and smiled, beginning to drop each one in his lap. We both got a great laugh! And yes, he chose Marie's potpie, which just happens to be one of the worst for good health, LOL
Bee, you ave your hand full like the rest of us. Mom is a full time job all by herself. And yes, I understand about the eating healthy taking so much more time and planing. When James had his heart attack in November we had to change a lot of our eating habits to fit the low sodium and low fat diet. It takes time, but it is getting better.
Linda, as I was sitting in the hospital feeding mom I would think of you and Pa often. You are such a wonderful daughter always so kind and patient with your Pa.
Still, it;s good to see you post. At least you have a sense of humor still! Can you get your dad to drink Ensure or Glucerna? Maybe a favorite food? I know mom's taste is different now that she is older and on so many medications.
SS, you definitely have your hands full with mom, dad, hubby and children. Maybe getting dad in the NH will be the first step in getting both him and mom situated better for you.
I'm feeling kind of brain dead today. I think all the sleepless nights at the hospital caught up with me and kicked me square in the pants. Plus the cold hospital I think helped get my sinuses going again. Oh well, at least mom is looking much better since being home.
Jen & Rip, how much snow have you gotten? Sis in Seattle was expecting at least 8 inches.
Have a good day my dear friends. You are all in my thoughts and prayers every day.
Since mom's passing in November, dad has lost so much weight. I called in health care to help me with some tools and it's a bit too overwhelming for him! Doesn't have an appetite, no energy and is totally lost! Told a friend the other day that I'm gonna find someone with "pot" and bake some good old brownies, LOL... I miss you guys and try to read some of your posts but overwhelmed. I do have all of you on my prayer list, do take good care of yourselves!!! :)
OH, Cuz. How do I follow that one? Well, I have to try. I spent some time trying to get caught up and I am full of joy for the good news some of you have shared, sadness for the new and continuing burdens of many, and grateful for the love and companionship we all find here. MariesMom - congratulations on hubby's new job and good wishes for all of you in the new adventures ahead! You deserve this. Diane - So happy you will have some respite! Take advantage, regroup and find joy in the moments. Hoe James is feeling even stronger! SS; It is good to hear Mom is finally accepting the reality about Dad's condition. Take advantage of whatever precious moments you, hubby and the kids can find to have some family time. Plan something special - even if it's just a movie or game night at home! Sheila - you are a rare gem. The gentle beauty of your soul shines through in your words. I read a piece recently about a loved one who kept forgetting that hey had eaten so kept requesting "lunch". What I came away with was that the poor sould just forgot that they'd just eaten. The solution was to "redirect" the conversation -"You really like_____ (grilled cheese sandwiches) I know. What else do you like to eat?" This helped me recently with Mom in another situation. But it's sure not easy to adapt to every situation every time. Perhaps with practice....
We should all colaborate on that tv series I mentioned a while back. lol
Linda- you are such a dear heart. Your Dad is blessed to have you caring for him. I pray that you are taking some time to mull over what you will do for yourself when the time comes. Your Dad wants you to proceed in your life with courage, anticipation of good things, and a plan to achieve your own goals when you commence from your role as his angel. Nothingsenough - Dogs doing laundry! There are many of us who would embrace that concept. Wonder if my cats could get into that? Your dogs are angels in your life. More importantly, I admire you (and many others) who see the lighter side of life under such duress. it was good to read that your honey finally gets the nature of the problem with his Mom. You are an angel to both of them! Ro- What can I say? You are a gentle soul and so very poetic. I hope you know the many ways you bless your family and friends - and us. Austin - I hope you are keeping a journal of the lovely memories you are accumulating with Winnie. They will comfort you in years to come. Lilliput, Cricket, Christina, Bobbie, Ted, Kimbo, LindaHHeart, Barb, Miz, Rip...and those I have not mentioned by name....You are all in my thoughts!
I've been reading the thread - and bouncing around a bit on some other threads and sites. So, while I haven't posted, I've stayed in touch. As I said earlier, there has been so much going on with Mom the past few weeks that reading was I could manage.
On a personal note, I was crushed once again last week when the specialist said she still isn't happy with my sclera lens and ordered another one. Meaning - another 5 weeks before she "may" sign off for me to reapply for my drivers license. I guess if I have to look at it positively, at least I won't have to drive in snow.
A week ago Mom had a follow-up appt with the doctor because she started the Exelon patch (4.5 mg) a month ago. I can't say I've noticed any difference at all in Mom's short term memory. Now, I'll have to throw in that she'd been bombardedd with inhome care: VN's, OT's, PT's, etc., many times a week which was confusing her. The IH also started, so she no longer had a "routine" for a month. But I wasn't comfortable with her responses to some situations so I called the doc's PA before Mom's appt and suggested they do a full blood panel and urine test. Lo and behold, this past Friday the PA called and said Mom has a UTI and needs to be on an antibiotic and follow that with another blood test this past Monday.
Mom was driving me nutty insisting she had to have blood work done on Sat. I had to make several phone calls to make sure nobody took her for blood work until Monday and had to swear everyone to secrecy. Mom was like a hornet with me on the phone. I know she is angry that she (in good moments) knows how much trouble she is having with her memory and ability to think abstractly. It is so sad.
Mom is finally easing up about having the IH caregiver. Not that she likes the idea but she has stopped fighting and now wants to change the schedule because the IH is there when she wants to fix dinner for "the kids and Dad". We'd hoped by having the IH there she wouldn't cook quite so much and then reheat it so many times that I'm sure it isn't very tasty.
In keeping with the topic - it grosses me out when she tells me she's cooked frozen Flounder (6 filets) but noone else ate. So the next night she reheats them. The night after that she chops some up in soup! YUK....a really BIG YUK!
For the past 10 eays or more I've had 3 or more calls per day from the various medical personel reporting on their observations. All good. Doesn't allow me much time to do anything else, but whatever. I'll eventually have a life again, right?
My brother called on Sunday and said he thinks we should start investigating ALF's. I'd already started gathering info - which has prompted several calls per day from various facilities.
My hubby and I started a healthier eating plan at his request. I've lost a few pounds - probably because I'm working my butt off planning and preparing these special meals every day in between all the other stuff. We're not eating any processed foods and I actually think I feel better.
So, it's been busy and I'm exhausted. It's another gloomy day here in western PA. Light snow falling and the temps are dropping by the hour. I think it's about 25 right now. I hope the roads aren't bad for hubby getting home tonight.
Well, the washer is calling and I need to plan tonight's dinner, call Mom, pay some bills, etc. Actually, I think a cup of coffee is in order.
It's been good to get caught up. I hope you all have as good a day as is possible. Hugs, Huts and Happy Thoughts for all of you! Bee
She's single... She lives right across the street. I can see her house from my living room. I watched as she got home from work this evening. I was surprised when she walked across the street and up my driveway. She knocked on my door... I rushed to open it. She looks at me, and says, "I just got home, and I am so horny! I really feel like having a good time, getting drunk and having great sex. Are you busy tonight?" I immediately replied, "Nope, I'm free... I have no plans at all!"
Then she said, "Good! In that case, could you watch my dog?"
So good to hear from you, Marie's Mom. What a relief that things are looking better. Diane, good luck with your Mom. Hope she settles down for you. My stepfather has an eye Dr appointment tomorrow. Only a 3 hour drive (one way).. Better get to bed, will be a long day. But, atleast talked my Mom out of going. She has been having pain with her back, and legs for months now. Spending all day in the car would not make it better, and she would spend the entire day telling everyone how bad she feels. Step Dad, is a sweet heart, he never complains.
Hey strangers. Barb here. I wanted to check in and say hello - and thanks to you who have worried and wrote.
It appears our fortunes have changed at last for the better.
My brothers finally accepted the inheritance Mom left - one even apologized for his behavior.
My husband is beginning a new job where he will have the responsibilities, salary and benefits he deserves - and we are moving 1000 miles SW of metro DC to Memphis - within a short days drive of our daughters and grandson.
After 1 1/2 yrs of unemployment, losing Mom, losing our home of 12 yrs to short sale (pending) well those of you who know me know 2011 was not a great year.
But 2012 is better -already. And I hope it will be better for all of us. I hope it will all work out for all of us and we will each 'get back' the good we have put out to the universe.
Thanks again to all of you who have been so good to me. You have my email. Don't be strangers.
Hi Y'all, Mom finally got out of the hospital today. It took radiology 4 days to read and MRI report. The end result is mom had a TIA and the MRI shows ischmic scarring indicating there had been previous events. Mom is still very confused which the doctor atributes to being in the hospital and having a UTI to add to the mix. I think it will be an interesting night since mom is already aggitated and thinking I'm my grandmother. The doctor calls it delirium, but frankly, its nuts!
I'm going to try get mom into bed and see how long that will last :0
SS-I am glad things have settled down a little and after her hip surgery she will need recovery time so that buy's time for you-please try to take care of yourself and after she is in rehab if she needs to be and probably will take time to rest and recharge yourself. My friend Winnie is still hanging in there with good and bad days-but at least she does recognize me at times. We had some snow last night but it melted during the day. I hope all our angels are on duty tonight and everyone's burdens are lighter tonight.
Hi all - meeting with Dad's care team today went very well. Mom has come around to the fact that he needs to be there a lot longer. Since Mom is having hip surgery at the end of February, all agreed he would stay put for, because there is still a lot be can't do on him own, and she'll be recovering herself. Whew!! Disaster averted for now! Sheila, thanks for your input. Yes, I have children and right now, the 14-year old is rockin' my world! But anyway, I have been the parent for my paretns for the last three years. It's a complete roll reversal something I don't think anyone is ready now. I know what is best for them right now and they do not. I am having a hard time balancing all of this with my own family. My husband is a saint but he's getting really tired of it all, and I don't blame him. Lots of little angels looking over me, thank you everyone....
I just read this post on Tha Alzheimer's Reading Room
Sally Hanselman: "If you've had a baby, you know that your baby does not know who a mother is. She just feels you taking care of her and that you love her. Only later can she call you or identify you as "mother." That baby is still going to be a toddler, then a child, then an adult, and all along the way, the baby changes "who" she is, but you love her all along.
An alzheimer's patient is not a baby, but in similar ways, you are the one that provides the love and care and support along the journey of their life.
For a while, my dad called me "a nice lady." This bothered some of my friends, but I didn't mind it. To him, I was a person who cared for him. Who wouldn't want to be a Nice Lady?"
That really touched me. My mom often refers to me as "that lady who calls all the time and helps me.". When someone tells me that II get a chill and usually laugh. It doesn't hurt me. When she's talking with me she ususally knows who I am. Lots going on here with Mom and hubby is finally back at school teaching. I have a lot of reading to do to get caught up here so I'll comment later. Love you guys. Hugs to all. Bee
A friend of mine just sent me this. It'll give you heart a little lift, and we can all use a little lift. I took away the message, "Burn bright, but don't burn out."
Nothingisenough ~ "I don't know which is best or most destructive (crying or being angry)." Both are honest emotions that one has to play out. It's got to be so frustrating to be putting yourself out there caring for your MIL, only to have her throw it back in your face. Every once in a while, my husband Alan will do something like that. He doesn't remember some things from one minute to another, so one day I was making one grilled cheese sandwich after another, because, as soon as he'd finish one, he'd forget he ate it and ask for another. When I decided enough was enough and told him no more, he said, "Well I guess I'm not going to get anything to eat around here." Mind you, he doesn't do this often like your MIL does, but I went ballistic. So I think you are to be commended for not slapping her upside the head.
SS ~ I know it would be easier to have your mother's cooperation, but you can more than likely go over her head. She may be a bit blustery at first, but you know it's necessary. I don't know if you have kids, but it's as if you're the parent now.to your mom. Sometimes the parent has to do something for the good of the child that angers the child, and the parent feels badly that the child is upset, but it's something that has to be done. And the child eventually gets over it. Whatever you decide, we're here for you.
Thank you everyone for responding to my plight. I'll let you know how it turns out. I've called and emailed anyone close to my parents to get into my mother's head that she can't take care of him. We shall see. Good luck with all of your own care giving. Even though our situations and circumstances vary, we all share a lot, including hope.
Meanwhile, when I went to the funeral of that uncle in Naples I was amazed to see a church full-full of people and everybody crying, relatives, friends, colleagues of work. He was a man who was so loved by everyone. He had a way to pass through everything in life - even through the war - with sense of humour, lightness, and a smile. A lesson that we often forget but in a way, a lesson which was understood by everyone who knew him (or a person like him)... I guess that they are kind of angels that we meet. People who teach us to live better.
BURGLARY IN FLORIDA (You just can't make this stuff up!!)
When southern Florida resident Nathan Radlich's house was burglarized recently, thieves ignored his wide screen plasma TV, his VCR, and even left his Rolex watch. What they did take, however, was a "generic white cardboard box filled with a grayish-white powder." (That's the way the police report described it.)
A spokesman for the Fort Lauderdale police said, that "it looked similar to high grade cocaine and they'd probably thought they'd hit the big time."
Later, Nathan stood in front of numerous TV cameras and pleaded with the burglars: "Please return the cremated remains of my sister, Gertrude. She died three years ago."
The next morning, the bullet-riddled corpse of a local drug dealer known as Hoochie Pevens was found on Nathan's doorstep. The cardboard box was there too; about half of Gertrude's ashes remained. Taped to the box was this note which said:"Hoochie sold us the bogus blow, so we wasted Hoochie. Sorry we snorted your sister. No hard feelings. Have a nice day."
And you thought California was the land of fruits and nuts!
An Amish farmer walking through his field notices a man drinking from his pond, with his hand. The Amish man shouts: "Trinken Sie nicht das Wasser, die Kuhe und die Schweine haben in ihm geschissen!"
Which means: "Don't drink the water, the cows and the pigs have shit in it."
The man shouts back: "I'm a Muslim, I don't understand your gibberish. Speak English, infidel!".
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Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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Cuz, and Bee thanks for the advice on my step Dad. I am off work today, and he is going to let me drive him into town. Hopefully, I can just start driving him around.
You have had your plate more than full. May God bless you all and comfort you.
worring about dad and worring about my sis in law and her baby girl . oh lord why ?? whats tmr ? no clue . whats going tohappen in 5 mins ? no clue . hoping and praying that all my love ones are safe , now this tragic things happen , shes only 21 .
i will try to ck the puter when i have the time , prayers pls . xoxo
At the National Art Gallery in Warsaw , a husband and wife were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused.
The painting depicted 3 black men totally naked, sitting on a bench.
Two of the figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis.
The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his personal assessment.
He went on for over half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of Africans in America in a predominately white, patriarchal society.
"In fact", he pointed out, "some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society".
After the curator left, an old Jewish gentleman approached the couple and said, "Would you like to know what the painting is really about?"
"Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the gallery?" asked the couple.
"Because I am the artist who painted the picture," he replied...
"In fact, there are no Africans depicted at all. They're just three Polish coal miners. The guy in the middle went home for lunch."
I feel for you with Pa. Been there ... heart just aches & aches. Sir was so appreciative & kind - concerned about me ... sound familar?
sniff - moving right along
Yikes! Snowbound on my steep hill. Still snowing here! Glad it isn't ice pellets like this morning.
Grateful to still have power. 200K without that luxury. When I was a kid I thought I'd be a great pioneer. Young ideas are wonderful, huh?
Watching continual news coverage. Very ugly conditions everywhere in Washington. Rare that the airport is closed - but it is. Freezing rain in many places, trees snapping, vehicles crashing, a couple of weather related deaths.
I feel fortunate to be safe & able to feed the birds. See FB for videos.
flex - ur moms home now , great . i rather have parents at home than at the hospital or nh , i dont worry as much . woried about dad in his bdrm alone is plenty enuff for me .
dad ask me lastnight to lay down with him . so i did , it was nice he closed his eyes and felt safe . i laid there prob a good half hr then he started coughin realy bad , had to get up and give him his breathing treatment . he was fussy afterwards . xannax didnt help . nurse told me today to give him half of activan imnot sure if im speeling that right , hell i cant spell worth shit anymore .
my mind just spins and spins .
my bro wants to come up here so bad and its over 1000 miles away . i told him i can zoom down and get him and zoom back up here . touched his heart and says not now . all his family is up here and he s feeling alone . he has his wife and sons there with him . but its not the same without his dad . cant be at 2 places at the same time and i know that feeling . i love my brother he is so sweet and kind .
rossella - big hugs to u and ur dorthy , shes a purrty girl ,
hows jsomebody ? missin her too , rip jsomebody are u guys snowed in ?
my sis lives up north about 1 and half hr drive . is getting about 3 inches of snow . i got nuthing but flurries ,. what the hell ! she hates snow i love snow . told her to stop begin such a hog !!! heehee
ill try to post some more later and need to get back in with dad and see if he s done arugein with me . hes wanting to get up i told him he llhave to wait till sis wakes up cuz im not going to try to get him out of bed alone . last timei did that we both fell on his bed , whew ! it was kinda funny tho . i laugh and laugh dad s eyes were so big !! blew him away lalala .
mariesmom !!! see told u something betters coming at your way whooo hoo and sure is better . love ur new place ! damn we re just 2 states away from eachother yippy , thyank you jesus for finding a better path for maries mom and a good job for her hubby . amen in the name of jesus whoo hoo . love u mariesmom !
meow at you all later . xoxo
Carolyn, I see that there is some mess around your mother but at least something is moving. Very soon a routine will be established - you know, at the beginning nobody really knows what to do and what the situation is, but after a while everything takes shape. It took months for me to "stabilize" my mother, to understand how much and what she had to eat, which pills she had to take and at what dosage... How to behave with her... It took a while but everything works quite well now. It's a beginning for your mom.... As far as food is concerned, as long as she doesn't eat rotten food or she takes it in and out of the freezer, there shoudn't be problems!
Diane, try to have some rest.
Big kiss to everyone.
Bee, you ave your hand full like the rest of us. Mom is a full time job all by herself. And yes, I understand about the eating healthy taking so much more time and planing. When James had his heart attack in November we had to change a lot of our eating habits to fit the low sodium and low fat diet. It takes time, but it is getting better.
Linda, as I was sitting in the hospital feeding mom I would think of you and Pa often. You are such a wonderful daughter always so kind and patient with your Pa.
Still, it;s good to see you post. At least you have a sense of humor still! Can you get your dad to drink Ensure or Glucerna? Maybe a favorite food? I know mom's taste is different now that she is older and on so many medications.
SS, you definitely have your hands full with mom, dad, hubby and children. Maybe getting dad in the NH will be the first step in getting both him and mom situated better for you.
I'm feeling kind of brain dead today. I think all the sleepless nights at the hospital caught up with me and kicked me square in the pants. Plus the cold hospital I think helped get my sinuses going again. Oh well, at least mom is looking much better since being home.
Jen & Rip, how much snow have you gotten? Sis in Seattle was expecting at least 8 inches.
Have a good day my dear friends. You are all in my thoughts and prayers every day.
Love ya,
Diane
Well, I have to try. I spent some time trying to get caught up and I am full of joy for the good news some of you have shared, sadness for the new and continuing burdens of many, and grateful for the love and companionship we all find here.
MariesMom - congratulations on hubby's new job and good wishes for all of you in the new adventures ahead! You deserve this.
Diane - So happy you will have some respite! Take advantage, regroup and find joy in the moments. Hoe James is feeling even stronger!
SS; It is good to hear Mom is finally accepting the reality about Dad's condition. Take advantage of whatever precious moments you, hubby and the kids can find to have some family time. Plan something special - even if it's just a movie or game night at home!
Sheila - you are a rare gem. The gentle beauty of your soul shines through in your words. I read a piece recently about a loved one who kept forgetting that hey had eaten so kept requesting "lunch". What I came away with was that the poor sould just forgot that they'd just eaten. The solution was to "redirect" the conversation -"You really like_____ (grilled cheese sandwiches) I know. What else do you like to eat?" This helped me recently with Mom in another situation. But it's sure not easy to adapt to every situation every time. Perhaps with practice....
We should all colaborate on that tv series I mentioned a while back. lol
Linda- you are such a dear heart. Your Dad is blessed to have you caring for him. I pray that you are taking some time to mull over what you will do for yourself when the time comes. Your Dad wants you to proceed in your life with courage, anticipation of good things, and a plan to achieve your own goals when you commence from your role as his angel.
Nothingsenough - Dogs doing laundry! There are many of us who would embrace that concept. Wonder if my cats could get into that? Your dogs are angels in your life. More importantly, I admire you (and many others) who see the lighter side of life under such duress. it was good to read that your honey finally gets the nature of the problem with his Mom. You are an angel to both of them!
Ro- What can I say? You are a gentle soul and so very poetic. I hope you know the many ways you bless your family and friends - and us.
Austin - I hope you are keeping a journal of the lovely memories you are accumulating with Winnie. They will comfort you in years to come.
Lilliput, Cricket, Christina, Bobbie, Ted, Kimbo, LindaHHeart, Barb, Miz, Rip...and those I have not mentioned by name....You are all in my thoughts!
I've been reading the thread - and bouncing around a bit on some other threads and sites. So, while I haven't posted, I've stayed in touch. As I said earlier, there has been so much going on with Mom the past few weeks that reading was I could manage.
On a personal note, I was crushed once again last week when the specialist said she still isn't happy with my sclera lens and ordered another one. Meaning - another 5 weeks before she "may" sign off for me to reapply for my drivers license. I guess if I have to look at it positively, at least I won't have to drive in snow.
A week ago Mom had a follow-up appt with the doctor because she started the Exelon patch (4.5 mg) a month ago. I can't say I've noticed any difference at all in Mom's short term memory. Now, I'll have to throw in that she'd been bombardedd with inhome care: VN's, OT's, PT's, etc., many times a week which was confusing her. The IH also started, so she no longer had a "routine" for a month. But I wasn't comfortable with her responses to some situations so I called the doc's PA before Mom's appt and suggested they do a full blood panel and urine test. Lo and behold, this past Friday the PA called and said Mom has a UTI and needs to be on an antibiotic and follow that with another blood test this past Monday.
Mom was driving me nutty insisting she had to have blood work done on Sat. I had to make several phone calls to make sure nobody took her for blood work until Monday and had to swear everyone to secrecy. Mom was like a hornet with me on the phone. I know she is angry that she (in good moments) knows how much trouble she is having with her memory and ability to think abstractly. It is so sad.
Mom is finally easing up about having the IH caregiver. Not that she likes the idea but she has stopped fighting and now wants to change the schedule because the IH is there when she wants to fix dinner for "the kids and Dad". We'd hoped by having the IH there she wouldn't cook quite so much and then reheat it so many times that I'm sure it isn't very tasty.
In keeping with the topic - it grosses me out when she tells me she's cooked frozen Flounder (6 filets) but noone else ate. So the next night she reheats them. The night after that she chops some up in soup! YUK....a really BIG YUK!
For the past 10 eays or more I've had 3 or more calls per day from the various medical personel reporting on their observations. All good. Doesn't allow me much time to do anything else, but whatever. I'll eventually have a life again, right?
My brother called on Sunday and said he thinks we should start investigating ALF's. I'd already started gathering info - which has prompted several calls per day from various facilities.
My hubby and I started a healthier eating plan at his request. I've lost a few pounds - probably because I'm working my butt off planning and preparing these special meals every day in between all the other stuff. We're not eating any processed foods and I actually think I feel better.
So, it's been busy and I'm exhausted. It's another gloomy day here in western PA. Light snow falling and the temps are dropping by the hour. I think it's about 25 right now. I hope the roads aren't bad for hubby getting home tonight.
Well, the washer is calling and I need to plan tonight's dinner, call Mom, pay some bills, etc. Actually, I think a cup of coffee is in order.
It's been good to get caught up. I hope you all have as good a day as is possible. Hugs, Huts and Happy Thoughts for all of you! Bee
She's single... She lives right across the street. I can see her house from my living room.
I watched as she got home from work this evening. I was surprised when she walked across the street and up my driveway. She knocked on my door... I rushed to open it.
She looks at me, and says, "I just got home, and I am so horny! I really feel like having a good time, getting drunk and having great sex. Are you busy tonight?"
I immediately replied, "Nope, I'm free... I have no plans at all!"
Then she said, "Good! In that case, could you watch my dog?"
MAN... IT'S NO FUN GETTING OLD........
Diane, good luck with your Mom. Hope she settles down for you.
My stepfather has an eye Dr appointment tomorrow. Only a 3 hour drive (one way).. Better get to bed, will be a long day. But, atleast talked my Mom out of going. She has been having pain with her back, and legs for months now. Spending all day in the car would not make it better, and she would spend the entire day telling everyone how bad she feels. Step Dad, is a sweet heart, he never complains.
It appears our fortunes have changed at last for the better.
My brothers finally accepted the inheritance Mom left - one even apologized for his behavior.
My husband is beginning a new job where he will have the responsibilities, salary and benefits he deserves - and we are moving 1000 miles SW of metro DC to Memphis - within a short days drive of our daughters and grandson.
After 1 1/2 yrs of unemployment, losing Mom, losing our home of 12 yrs to short sale (pending) well those of you who know me know 2011 was not a great year.
But 2012 is better -already. And I hope it will be better for all of us. I hope it will all work out for all of us and we will each 'get back' the good we have put out to the universe.
Thanks again to all of you who have been so good to me. You have my email. Don't be strangers.
Mom finally got out of the hospital today. It took radiology 4 days to read and MRI report. The end result is mom had a TIA and the MRI shows ischmic scarring indicating there had been previous events. Mom is still very confused which the doctor atributes to being in the hospital and having a UTI to add to the mix. I think it will be an interesting night since mom is already aggitated and thinking I'm my grandmother. The doctor calls it delirium, but frankly, its nuts!
I'm going to try get mom into bed and see how long that will last :0
Have good night and huts to you all!
Love ya,
Diane
Sheila, thanks for your input. Yes, I have children and right now, the 14-year old is rockin' my world! But anyway, I have been the parent for my paretns for the last three years. It's a complete roll reversal something I don't think anyone is ready now. I know what is best for them right now and they do not. I am having a hard time balancing all of this with my own family. My husband is a saint but he's getting really tired of it all, and I don't blame him.
Lots of little angels looking over me, thank you everyone....
xo
-SS
Sally Hanselman: "If you've had a baby, you know that your baby does not know who a mother is. She just feels you taking care of her and that you love her. Only later can she call you or identify you as "mother." That baby is still going to be a toddler, then a child, then an adult, and all along the way, the baby changes "who" she is, but you love her all along.
An alzheimer's patient is not a baby, but in similar ways, you are the one that provides the love and care and support along the journey of their life.
For a while, my dad called me "a nice lady." This bothered some of my friends, but I didn't mind it. To him, I was a person who cared for him. Who wouldn't want to be a Nice Lady?"
That really touched me. My mom often refers to me as "that lady who calls all the time and helps me.". When someone tells me that II get a chill and usually laugh. It doesn't hurt me. When she's talking with me she ususally knows who I am.
Lots going on here with Mom and hubby is finally back at school teaching. I have a lot of reading to do to get caught up here so I'll comment later. Love you guys. Hugs to all. Bee
SS ~ I know it would be easier to have your mother's cooperation, but you can more than likely go over her head. She may be a bit blustery at first, but you know it's necessary. I don't know if you have kids, but it's as if you're the parent now.to your mom. Sometimes the parent has to do something for the good of the child that angers the child, and the parent feels badly that the child is upset, but it's something that has to be done. And the child eventually gets over it. Whatever you decide, we're here for you.
Enjoy the day.
-SS
When southern Florida resident Nathan Radlich's house was burglarized recently, thieves ignored his wide screen plasma TV, his VCR, and even left his Rolex watch. What they did take, however, was a "generic white cardboard box filled with a grayish-white powder." (That's the way the police report described it.)
A spokesman for the Fort Lauderdale police said, that "it looked similar to high grade cocaine and they'd probably thought they'd hit the big time."
Later, Nathan stood in front of numerous TV cameras and pleaded with the burglars: "Please return the cremated remains of my sister, Gertrude.
She died three years ago."
The next morning, the bullet-riddled corpse of a local drug dealer known as Hoochie Pevens was found on Nathan's doorstep. The cardboard box was there too; about half of Gertrude's ashes remained. Taped to the box was this note which said:"Hoochie sold us the bogus blow, so we wasted Hoochie. Sorry we snorted your sister. No hard feelings. Have a nice day."
And you thought California was the land of fruits and nuts!
An Amish farmer walking through his field notices a man
drinking from his pond, with his hand.
The Amish man shouts:
"Trinken Sie nicht das Wasser, die Kuhe und die Schweine
haben in ihm geschissen!"
Which means: "Don't drink the water, the cows and the pigs
have shit in it."
The man shouts back: "I'm a Muslim, I don't understand
your gibberish. Speak English, infidel!".
The Amish man shouts back in English:
"Use two hands, you'll get more!".