Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Kuli, it's so good to hear from you and I am always happy to hear of fast friendships formed by those who have met on this thread. Please say hi to Rip for me.
So we have 3 babies in the works… sharynmarie's family is expecting twins and Jen's family is expecting a baby and Juju's friends already had a healthy baby. One has arrived and 3 to go!
The only experience I ever had with a goat is the time I was working at a horse ranch and they told me to leave my lunch in my pick up truck until lunch time. It was hot out so I left the windows open. I came back to the truck and there was a goat in the passenger seat eating my lunch because he had already finished one of the headrests. F**ker!
It's good to see everyone here and I hope you all are coping as well as you can with the insanity you are dealing with. It all can be a heartbreaker for sure.
That is good news, Jen. Austin, if your sister's goat chases people, tell her to try throwing water on it. Goats hate water. My goat wasn't chasing me, I was chasing him.
More baby news, my niece is expecting her first...early days yet, hope all goes well for them! Still Spring here, one more really cold week I think then we head to Summer...Hope CA gets some rain!!! Seriously not good! Have a good weekend all...
bob- thank you so much for starting this and for staying with us for all of these years. Yes, I still lurk and add anything I think will help those still going through the whole process. I only hope you will always know my appreciation for starting this thread and providing me with an outlet that helped me keep my sanity while caring for my dad. I also will forever be grateful for those I have met here that I continue to have a relationship, even though I have never met them face to face. Honestly, the people I have met here are so much closer to me than my own family because they were always here for me and totally understood what I was going through. RIP and I still email each other on a regular basis and I hope I will have the opportunity to meet her face to face in the future because I feel closer to her than my own sister. And, you, Bob, have been so honest, so supportive as you went through your own difficulties and as you have moved on. You truly have been the captain of this ship and I feel honored to have been a part of this. Thank you and hugs ~ Kuli
Juju such good news about your friends baby. Only excitement here is my horse letting the 275 pound buck goat out of his pen. At least Cory is getting blamed, since he was in the buck pen eating hay, while the buck was out chasing the girl goats around the pasture. Finally got everyone sorted out, and the buck to follow me back to his pen for a bucket of grain. But, when I set the bucket down the goat managed to get his head under the handle. So took another 10 minutes of chasing the goat to get the bucket off his head.
Happy 4th birthday to the gross thread..I have received awesome suuport here. I'm I. NorCal not part of Hollyweird or beach sunsets but a big part of everyday life and the major supplier of precious water. Juju-congrats to your friends..healthy and happy is all that counts.
I'm in central Michigan. I could be the chauffeur when this cruise takes place. Bobbie's boat is only 38' longer than mine but I used to drive a big rig so no problemo.
LOL. Thanks. I only have a bartending cerificaiton so I can legally serve. However, I have played drums for over 35 yrs and continue to play for a classic rock band, so we could have a great cruise with fun music and BIG frozen margaritas!
I certainly understand not wanting to put locations out there but just throwing out that if anyone in the DFW area needs a support group they are always welcome to message me and they can join us for one of our "venting" get togethers! We go out to safe public places where there are lots of people. (and we're fairly sane too)
Yay! a Bartender! Much needed skill and as important as driving the boat. Welcome Aboard LisaRose!
Some folks with respond and some will prefer to keep their locations private. We have had caregivers from this thread actually meet and form friendships that are strong.
Keep posting and like minds will end up finding each other for sure.
Laughing at these posts and as I read I wonder how to get in on the "Caregiver Cruise" that you all are dreaming about. LOL! I have a bartending license! I can bring a band too. In any case, would it be wrong to actually ask what area other people here live in just in case we could actuall form some groups?? I am in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area and my mother is in AL with 3 of my friends moms that also live there. So, I am lucky to already have somewhat of a discussion/cry on shoulders group. We're always open to more people that need to vent once in awhile! :)
What's gross is all the coughing and spitting into tissues or napkins that get left all over the dam house! Be very careful what you pick up around here! GROSS! Been a rough morning already!
Hi All! Real busy here going to the NH everyday for lunch etc with mom. The sibs go for dinner and the weekends. Having some resentful feelings but trying to stay positive. Been doing all the paperwork for Medicaid. Wow. Lots of that! Just got a letter from them requesting what more they want. Daunting. Mom got the pins out of her other hand. Now, we gotta work on getting her hands moving again. Wondering when she starts feeding herself again, if the sibs will stop coming as much. We'll see! Mom was holding her milk carton yesterday! Juju-you mentioned music being so good for us-apparently, it is not just good for us humans! On mom's milk carton, mom read to us, it said that cows who hear music while they are being milked give more milk than cows who don't get to hear music! Who knew?!!! Mom thought that was so interesting, she would read it to the aides that would walk by! She is too cute! I am just plugging along, getting done what has to be done... My back is taking it's sweet time getting better... I think it may be stress keeping it the way it is! Damnit! Happy Hump day all! Mame
Thank you Austin, Jen! Hope everyone has a good day! Raining here all week. it had been relatively dry season, but it is coming down now for a few days now. Been dealing with budget issuesthe floor went in, gave me the time to figure out the best way to do the rest and shop for everything. \ The BFF is scheduled for Csection Thursday so I switched my CG sked around and will go see here that eve, leave ma at home!! It will be quick. least hospital is in the middle of us not the full 90 miles! Excited to meet li'l Tyler.... Yes that is 3 boys, all were hoping for a girl but you know healthy is the important thing!
Mame, hope things are going ok at the facility! and mom is doing better! ma was a bit off, so as I suspected she had a UTI couple weeks ago, was actually nice I (politely) bitched so much about the leg incedent to her GP they are real accommodating now. I was able to just bring in a sample (without her) and get the A/B's called in. Jen Hang in there...I am so proud of you got yourself going to the Y and therapy...And music, I need to listen more...does make one feel better, it is proven. Glad your finally feeling better, that was a nasty cold gone wild!
Bobbie, Meanwhile, Austin, Cuz, Kuli, Deefer, Sharyn....everyone your in my thoughts and prayers. Stay warm n dry to those in the weather zones!
I caught my Mom using my electric toothbrush to "shave" her hairs on her chin. I was grossed out. I gave it to her. She has had dementia for close to 2 years. Every day is an experience. Seraquil has calmed her down and her fateful angry days are very few.
juju I hear ya! I am always the ear in my life though, here is the one place I grouse endlessly...Even in therapy I am reticent. Austin we could use something like that here, I know some law school have pro bono programs but they are very specific to whom they can and can't help... Sleep too much, but had nothing but nightmares anyway...And woke to another morning of: "Daddy there is POOP on your hands you need to wash your hands every time you use the urinal or change your underwear..." "Well, he beh it's DRY!" "It doesn't matter , it's covered in germs, you HAVE to use the wipes I put in your room, they have anti-bacterial liquid on them..." "Well mhhnmmash rerem ..." "I don't know why I can't make you understand that POOP has germs and you need to wash your hands!?" I can't understand why she thinks he is gonna get it after 15 years at age 93! She'll just make herself crazy, keep the wipes at the table and make him use them every time he comes to the table... Windy as all get out today. I'd have all the doors and windows open if I could...Sun has melted most all the snow here in Spokane. Sorry to the people in the East I saw another storm moved in! Hope everyone has a sane week where ever they are...Jen
Juju I am so sorry for what you are going through-in our county we have an Office of the AGING where a lawyer donates 1 day a week of his time to help people such as yourself maybe there is something like that available to you-maybe Social Service could be of help to you or a Caregivers support group locally-Ihate to see you out there on your own.
I have to reiterate Happy 4ys to the thread and how much I am grateful for you all! I found you at me deepest darkest low and I believe this GO thread saved my life! I Oh jen, I so agree I have nothing to offer…. I hate being a drain or complainer….but that is my life right now. I have never been so alone in my entire life! It is just me n ma. So sometimes I just want not to say anything if I cant say something happy joyful and supportive to others. I am so alone and sometimes go for days without seeing or talking to anyone but Ma n the dogs. If it wasn’t for the CG’ visit here it would be no one but store clerks etc….. Anyway so when I get here, or with a friend, I just want to talk, say something to someone! I am so bottled up I have no room in my mind to unwind and absorb what is going on with others…..i hate , hate, hate it! I want my life back! Anyway, Good news is I finally got a new senior companion 3hrs a week. She is going to piggyback with the private help so instead of 3 hrs. ….I CAN LEAVE THE HOUSE FOR 6HRS ON MONDAY AFTERNOONS!!!! WOOT WOOT!!! Now if I just had someone to go visit or do things with! But it will be nice to not have to rush rush for the shopping…1hr travel time only left 2hrs to get things done in town.
Well last week was a milestone of sorts, 1 yr since mom was dropped and broke her hip changing our life forever! I feel some kind of accomplishment as I was so freaked out by rumors that hip fracture leads to death… I did some researched her injury It was stated that the first year was critical. If they make it thru the first year they are usually fine (from that injuryies threat) I after going thru all we have in the past year, I finally feel i can maybe start taking care of a few things besides this house repair….. I keep thinking of that vision I had few weeks ago, of life after mom, I have to, or I will become complacent in the exhaustion and my passive aggressive denial of the situation put me back in a coma. It started to happen again in the fall when things seemed unbearable. I heard something somewhere about disability /early retirement at age50, some kind of program. I should have gone out on family leave when dad got sick, then disability, but I never expected to be staying home. I had planned to work again. I just was naïve at how little/low paying jobs would be in my new area…coming up in the Silicon Valley and always being able to get a great job. I had an idea it would be different but not as bad as it really is here and how being alone in a new town I would not have the little bit of help and support I did have. So anyway It is 10 ys since I left the workforce so I don’t know if I could even qualify but I will try! As well as looking into other options . That vision really woke me up to how time is not on my side! I have to get moving , motivated me. Before the repairs on the home it was such a complete disaster of a situation needing so much repair I had the poor attitude that it was a loss anyway, needed so much work to make it decent, and now I am getting a lot of it taken care of and it will be so nicely redone kitchen baths n flooring …I would be heartbroken to lose it after spending ¾ of a year consumed by the reno…that is for our benefit not the mortgage companies!!! At least it will make it more marketable if I do have to sell, I just hate to lose it, for it to be forclosed on, before I can get things figured out and sell or whatever I will end up doing! Anyway thank you all for being here and saving my life!! Seriously!!! I am not using that term lightly!!!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Thanks everyone wishing her well...
Kuli, it's so good to hear from you and I am always happy to hear of fast friendships formed by those who have met on this thread. Please say hi to Rip for me.
So we have 3 babies in the works… sharynmarie's family is expecting twins and Jen's family is expecting a baby and Juju's friends already had a healthy baby.
One has arrived and 3 to go!
The only experience I ever had with a goat is the time I was working at a horse ranch and they told me to leave my lunch in my pick up truck until lunch time. It was hot out so I left the windows open. I came back to the truck and there was a goat in the passenger seat eating my lunch because he had already finished one of the headrests.
F**ker!
It's good to see everyone here and I hope you all are coping as well as you can with the insanity you are dealing with.
It all can be a heartbreaker for sure.
DEEF!! Wassup?
lovbob
Still Spring here, one more really cold week I think then we head to Summer...Hope CA gets some rain!!! Seriously not good! Have a good weekend all...
Juju-congrats to your friends..healthy and happy is all that counts.
I certainly understand not wanting to put locations out there but just throwing out that if anyone in the DFW area needs a support group they are always welcome to message me and they can join us for one of our "venting" get togethers! We go out to safe public places where there are lots of people. (and we're fairly sane too)
Some folks with respond and some will prefer to keep their locations private. We have had caregivers from this thread actually meet and form friendships that are strong.
Keep posting and like minds will end up finding each other for sure.
Glad you are on the boat with us!
lovbob
In any case, would it be wrong to actually ask what area other people here live in just in case we could actuall form some groups?? I am in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area and my mother is in AL with 3 of my friends moms that also live there. So, I am lucky to already have somewhat of a discussion/cry on shoulders group. We're always open to more people that need to vent once in awhile! :)
The BFF is scheduled for Csection Thursday so I switched my CG sked around and will go see here that eve, leave ma at home!! It will be quick. least hospital is in the middle of us not the full 90 miles! Excited to meet li'l Tyler.... Yes that is 3 boys, all were hoping for a girl but you know healthy is the important thing!
Mame, hope things are going ok at the facility! and mom is doing better! ma was a bit off, so as I suspected she had a UTI couple weeks ago, was actually nice I (politely) bitched so much about the leg incedent to her GP they are real accommodating now. I was able to just bring in a sample (without her) and get the A/B's called in.
Jen Hang in there...I am so proud of you got yourself going to the Y and therapy...And music, I need to listen more...does make one feel better, it is proven. Glad your finally feeling better, that was a nasty cold gone wild!
Bobbie, Meanwhile, Austin, Cuz, Kuli, Deefer, Sharyn....everyone your in my thoughts and prayers. Stay warm n dry to those in the weather zones!
Peace,
Juju
Austin we could use something like that here, I know some law school have pro bono programs but they are very specific to whom they can and can't help...
Sleep too much, but had nothing but nightmares anyway...And woke to another morning of:
"Daddy there is POOP on your hands you need to wash your hands every time you use the urinal or change your underwear..."
"Well, he beh it's DRY!"
"It doesn't matter , it's covered in germs, you HAVE to use the wipes I put in your room, they have anti-bacterial liquid on them..."
"Well mhhnmmash rerem ..."
"I don't know why I can't make you understand that POOP has germs and you need to wash your hands!?"
I can't understand why she thinks he is gonna get it after 15 years at age 93! She'll just make herself crazy, keep the wipes at the table and make him use them every time he comes to the table...
Windy as all get out today. I'd have all the doors and windows open if I could...Sun has melted most all the snow here in Spokane. Sorry to the people in the East I saw another storm moved in!
Hope everyone has a sane week where ever they are...Jen
Oh jen, I so agree I have nothing to offer…. I hate being a drain or complainer….but that is my life right now. I have never been so alone in my entire life! It is just me n ma. So sometimes I just want not to say anything if I cant say something happy joyful and supportive to others. I am so alone and sometimes go for days without seeing or talking to anyone but Ma n the dogs. If it wasn’t for the CG’ visit here it would be no one but store clerks etc….. Anyway so when I get here, or with a friend, I just want to talk, say something to someone! I am so bottled up I have no room in my mind to unwind and absorb what is going on with others…..i hate , hate, hate it! I want my life back!
Anyway, Good news is I finally got a new senior companion 3hrs a week. She is going to piggyback with the private help so instead of 3 hrs. ….I CAN LEAVE THE HOUSE FOR 6HRS ON MONDAY AFTERNOONS!!!! WOOT WOOT!!! Now if I just had someone to go visit or do things with! But it will be nice to not have to rush rush for the shopping…1hr travel time only left 2hrs to get things done in town.
Well last week was a milestone of sorts, 1 yr since mom was dropped and broke her hip changing our life forever! I feel some kind of accomplishment as I was so freaked out by rumors that hip fracture leads to death… I did some researched her injury It was stated that the first year was critical. If they make it thru the first year they are usually fine (from that injuryies threat) I after going thru all we have in the past year, I finally feel i can maybe start taking care of a few things besides this house repair….. I keep thinking of that vision I had few weeks ago, of life after mom, I have to, or I will become complacent in the exhaustion and my passive aggressive denial of the situation put me back in a coma. It started to happen again in the fall when things seemed unbearable.
I heard something somewhere about disability /early retirement at age50, some kind of program.
I should have gone out on family leave when dad got sick, then disability, but I never expected to be staying home. I had planned to work again. I just was naïve at how little/low paying jobs would be in my new area…coming up in the Silicon Valley and always being able to get a great job. I had an idea it would be different but not as bad as it really is here and how being alone in a new town I would not have the little bit of help and support I did have. So anyway It is 10 ys since I left the workforce so I don’t know if I could even qualify but I will try! As well as looking into other options .
That vision really woke me up to how time is not on my side! I have to get moving , motivated me. Before the repairs on the home it was such a complete disaster of a situation needing so much repair I had the poor attitude that it was a loss anyway, needed so much work to make it decent, and now I am getting a lot of it taken care of and it will be so nicely redone kitchen baths n flooring …I would be heartbroken to lose it after spending ¾ of a year consumed by the reno…that is for our benefit not the mortgage companies!!! At least it will make it more marketable if I do have to sell, I just hate to lose it, for it to be forclosed on, before I can get things figured out and sell or whatever I will end up doing!
Anyway thank you all for being here and saving my life!! Seriously!!! I am not using that term lightly!!!
Love to you all XOXOX!!
Peace,
Juju