I feel mixed emotions. I'm almost prepared and my daughter and me we discussed how to go about the funeral and cremation. You know, we kind of rehearsed and role play in our heads what will happen next. But as they say no matter how prepared you are, when you see a parent's dead body it's so difficult and heart-wrenching. My mom's Alzheimer's, osteoporosia and bone pain etched into her face. She looks so emaciated and in pain. She's skeleton now. Literally a skeleton. An empty shell of what she used to be when she was very feisty, so outspoken and could even fight military and policemen. All the years of body pain is all written on her bony face. Death is imminent. She's not speaking any more and not eating, can't even open her mouth. Her eyes hazy foggy. I just held her hands, softly whisper to her ears, try to comfort her. She's staying at home. We can't afford any more hospital. We're readying whatever meager funds we have for her funeral and cremation. I'm glad I had the strength to get a funeral plan 2.5 years ago. At least I won't have to be paying on the spot cash out. It's been 19 years of caregiving and it's obviously coming to an end. Honestly I feel a sense of impending relief. To me being a Christian, I'm seeing that my mom's spirit will soon be freed from the old, sick body. To some extend, I actually feel gladness and sadness at the same time. I will be keeping my Agingcare friends posted. Thanks so much for this website. I read many helpful articles here and gained practical wisdom and know-how from the experiences shared by caregivers just like me who are broke, are the only child, and single mom like me and being the only family breadwinner juggling caregiving, raising daughter, sending her to school, doing house chores, juggling all sorts of jobs just to make ends meet., I'm so thankful to all of you. My mom is on her last stretch now. Maybe a week or two or a month or so, it's all over. I will give her a hug now and hope she opens her mouth a bit so I can drop some cold water or warm porridge to feed her frail body. Thanks, talk to you all again. Please pray for my mom Sally. She's 81 years old.
Cherish your time with your mom. Release her when her journey is over because she will be free of pain and agony. You fought the battle with her. You are a loving daughter. I wish you peace dear lady.
My prayers are with you.
Dina