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So later that day I went by her house -- she lives alone and still drives--- a friend of hers was there when I came over and she told her friend --- here she comes---- I came in the door and say hello but it was a little awkward --- she continued to talk about me as if I was not there and gets very agitated when someone else wants to add to the conversation. I left after about 30 minutes after she said someone needs to put her (me) in jail. A lot of verbal abuse from my mother --- to my face ---when friends are visiting her --- for some reason I am the enemy --- she does not trust me and is very paranoid . Help!!!

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Adams, it sounds as if mom may have a urinary tract infection or something going on. Any sort of infection can cause delusional and nasty behaviors in the elderly. Does mom have her legal documents in order? Powers of attorney, living will, etc? I certainly sounds like something is going wrong. Has she been diagnosed with dementia? Has she always behaved this way?
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Your profile says that your mom has Alzheimer's. Paranoia is a hallmark symptom of Alzheimer's although being aware of that probably doesn't make it any easier on you.

I would agree with gladimhere. If this is a symptom that came on suddenly it might be a good idea to get her to a Dr. and checked for a UTI.
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What scared me about your post is that she is still driving. Please look into this and find out if she can still drive. My baby granddaughter is out there and I don't want to lose her.
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Adam's it does sound like a UTI to Me too. I know it is hard for You but greet Your Mom's anger with kindness towards Her, plus bring Your Mom's favourite little treats every time You call to visit Her. Re assure Your Mom that You Love Her and that You will always be there for Her..no matter what. You will be amazed at the positive reaction. Peace and {{{{{HUG'S}}}}} to You and Your Mom.
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I feel for you. Been to that movie.

If the doctor rules out a UTI, she needs a cognitive evaluation, and not the "mini-mental" most family/general practitioners give. She needs to be seen by a geriatric doctor.

My mother was exactly like that before she got seen by a geriatric psych and put on the right meds. Mom told people she had no children at all, so they were surprised to hear from me when we were moving her to an apartment.

She would berate me in the third person while I stood before her and it did not matter who else was in the room. Absolutely no shame whatsoever.

Mom was also like this when I was in high school decades ago. She purposefully tried to embarrass me in front of anyone who might try to strike up a friendship or take me on a date.

Turns out she had untreated bi-polar and some personality disorders. When the dementia was getting worse, it really exacerbated things. Poor women went most of her life without the right medication or therapy. It was rough.
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