I want to thank everyone around here for their support, information and humor over the last six years. And for those who sent me messages about my situation. I was the sole caregiver for my older cousin.
Sometimes, I posted inquiring about any sign the end was near, but as it turns out, my cousin had hardly any sign she was actively dying. She (69 years old) was end stage and on hospice, but she ate well, had good vitals and had no change since a few months ago when she started sleeping more. So, it was a surprise when I got the call. I was glad that I had visited her through the window, since covid and while she couldn't focus on me, I could see she was being well cared for. While in MC she never had any skin breakdown, no colds, no virus, no flu, and no covid. I found it amazing.
A staff member was present when she passed and said it was very peaceful. The staff were shocked as well. The night before another longtime resident, who was close to her had gone and laid down at the foot of her bed....an unusual occurrence. We now think she sensed it. My LO was smiling, touched the staff member's finger and in no distress, hours before she passed. She had taken a nap and went in her sleep. So, for this I am grateful.
I hope you will stay right here and help give all the wisdom you have learned forward; that would do her great honor.
Please take good care. I hope that some part of what you feel is what I have felt at the loss of those who I loved so in my life, that they need never be anxious or afraid or hurt again, that they are at peace, that I never have to be afraid for them.
I've been reflecting on her life since last week and going over so many photos, crafts, documents that make a life. I was her person, so to speak. I'm not sure it's really hit me yet. I have moments that I cry, but, I know she's fine and now with her other family members. I've lost quite a few friends over the last 18 months. It's unreal. All we can do is hang in there and support each other.
In the summer, after covid situation is better, we are planning her celebration of life luncheon.
While I'm sad for your loss, I'm grateful as well that it was a peaceful passing, and I hope that that as well as the many years that you cared for her will dominate your memories as opposed to her last days.
You are a dedicated and amazing person, and I wish you peace as you navigate this next phase of your life.
Hugs!!!
How very fortunate for your cousin to have had you as her advocate. I think it is hard to grasp death when it comes. Even though we know the person is very ill or old or terminal, it still shocks us when it happens. She was in a facility yet she was with you in so many ways. You will miss her and remember her and cherish your times together in days gone by. And her friend who came to be with her will also miss her. She was loved.