On My Mind

Put the lime in the coconut, you called your doctor, woke him up,
And say, 'Doctor, ain't there nothing I can take,
I say, Doctor, to relieve this belly ache?
I say, Doctor, doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take,
I say, Doctor, dooooctor, to relieve this belly ache?'
Put the lime in the coconut, drink them both together,
Put the lime in the coconut, then you feel better,
Put the lime in the coconut, drink them both up,
Put the lime in the coconut, and call me in the morning

My primary doctor had me take a drug DNA test and the outcome was interesting.

On the list for meds for tranquilizers it said do not take Valium. Ah ha, that explained back when I was in my 20's why this med didn't really help.

Also, for acid reflux, the names of all the popular brand name pills will not work for me. Another ah ha moment. No wonder I didn't get any relief. Now I only use Tums Smooties and they work soooo much better.

That drug DNA was one of the best tests I ever had. It also showed for me to stay away from Warfarin [blood thinner].

Thanks Send, how the song is stuck in my head!LOL

I remember my grandmother used to say "least said soonest mended".

Just remembering when aging care was a nice escape from the life of caregiving. Where we unite to support, encourage and help one another. Where we shared dinners, and gardening and stories of our loved ones. Where we shared laughs, and tears.
It is really a shame to lose all that because someone would rather disrupt and cause disturbances out of selfishness and thoughtlessness and such a critical spirit.


And I am tired.

It is sad. I have my share of the messages as well. I believe that it is harassment.

If you paint a skunk pink and call it a kitten, it still smells like a skunk.

smeshque - you're one of the nicest persons here, and I have your back. Don't you leave AgingCare site. And you should post to whatever thread you want. Report to Admin whenever you receive an inappropriate message.

The same goes for all the nice and supportive people on this site, too. Stay and support each other.

PolarBear- Thank you.Your one of the reasons I would not leave, You all have taught me so much and have supported me in hard times. I love my aging care family. I know if I need you all that I can come running and get a hug of kind words and advice and encouragement. It is a beautiful thing here. And I stand behind you too my friend.

Plus- I ain't afraid of skunks. :)

Smeshque I am sorry, but I had to laugh at your skunk trying to be a kitten!

I do feel harassed.

I came here looking for help and support as all of you and the only reason I have stayed is because there are nice and helpful people here like you Polarbear, Smeshque, Worried and others.

I just don't understand how someone can be so nasty and be allowed to stay on this forum!

Appalling isn't the word on how I feel!

Thank you Worried for your support and I am sorry that you got dragged into this. But I am not leaving!!!

I have personally been very disappointed in some members of our forum over the last couple of weeks. Maybe the spat has been going on longer than a couple of weeks and I just became so aware of it after I became a target of the in your face insults and multiple harnessing PMs. In any case I see members who posts have been helpful and comforting over the years engaging in angry and hateful posts. One member in particular seems to be posting very angry messages/replies anytime anyone disagrees and/or challenges her views although when replying to a direct call for help continues to post polite and helpful responses. Other members are responding to angry posts with anger and name calling of their own.

I wonder what is causing our member to post such angry responses to even mild disagreement. I wonder who or what bad experience she has had to be so angry at others who express a belief in God. I wonder about how much pain and/or stress she could be in to cause these behaviors. Although nothing justifies trashing our forum with abusive posts, I do wonder about her pain. She would probably not like this at all, but I do pray for her and that she soon gets some relief from whatever her problem is. I do not have to wonder about the pain she feels from the direct attack responses sent to her. I suspect some members have felt their anger justifies deliberately hurting another care giver; I do not.

In any mutually supportive forum, we cannot attack those with differing views as either "trolls" or evil and uncaring. Neither can we characterize not just people who differ with us over an issue but to anyone who watches/reads a particular news agency, has a particular political view or consider themselves religious as unworthy of polite and respectful discourse. We cannot ask/demand that someone leave the forum because we don't like their posts, even when those posts are abusive. We can ask the person to be kinder and more respectful. We can report abusive posts so maybe someday the admins will take them down and they do not continue to contribute to long threads of mutual disrespect.

AC is about care giving. We come from all walks of life with very different life experiences. Some of have lived all our lives in rural areas; some in cities both large and small; many have lives that include both experiences. Some of us are better off financially than others but it appears most of us have endured financial hardship at least during some period of our lives. We include the very religious, the spiritual, and the unbelievers as well as liberal progressives, libertarians, physical conservatives, die hard conservatives and all the possible mixtures.

We ALL CARE about CARE GIVING. Very occasionally someone who is not really concerned about care giving makes their way onto this forum, sometimes they even cause some problems for a while but that is not the norm and does not include most members and posters on this site. Most people are here to learn about care giving and to share their care giving knowledge and experience with others in a effort to "pass it forward".

Sometimes our religious or political leanings become relevant to a discussion but no one who steps up to become a care giver for another human being deserves to be labeled as a "troll". So I asking everyone to please reflect on our care giver membership and the stresses they may be experiencing any given day and consider leaving off the personal derogatory phases and characterizations. PLEASE walk around the house and count to ten and take several deep breaths before posting a flaming comment.

There are far worse names than a troll that one can be called. If you get upset over being called, or seeing someone else called, an “internet troll” well....can’t relate! An internet troll is someone who starts quarrels and postings things to intentionally upset people on the internet. So....if it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck and walks like a duck, I will continue to call it a duck ;)

shell glad you saw my message :)

Let me make it clear here-this person is actively trolling and harassing someone as I post this. I just saw them trolling a certain poster on a thread she hasn’t even replied to! Similarly to how they trolled me yesterday by making a comment about me on a thread I hadn’t been on. The comment is upset and disrupt—I repeat that is what makes someone an internet troll.

I’ve had to turn my private messages off twice because this deranged person keeps sending me rude and harassing messages. I’m just one of a handful of members who have been harassed in this manner by the troll.

I won’t be made to be feel guilty or like a bad guy for calling them a troll. Not when they are telling grieving members “I can see why your mom died. She wanted to get away from you” and telling someone else they are a CU Next Tuesday who needs to have sex. Not when they are replying to OPs and commenters & saying rude and disparaging things about posters who aren’t involved in the thread. Not when they reply to MY comments and call me a troll. No one else’s is behaving in that matter and saying those kind of horrible things so I really don’t care if anyone is disappointed in those who have engaged in angry posts. Cry a river. Get over it. Be disappointed in the admins who continue to let ONE person attack and harass the members of this community.

I said what I said and I don’t regret it. If that person doesn’t want to be called a troll.....they should stop acting like one. They can’t change our behavior but they can change theirs.

If some of you want to continually roll around in a big pile of dog sh*t that's on you, just don't keep complaining that it smells.
The unfortunate thing is that everyone else around you can smell it too.

worriedinCA- I totally understand how you feel. It's only natural to be upset when someone spews ugly things at you. I would too if I read that trash. But please...

DON'T read it.
Or if you come across it, REPORT it.
Then tell yourself: "I won't give that troll the power to ruin my day. It's not worth one second of my time."
Then think of all of the other posters who are kind, understanding and supportive, and who would write you the nicest things to lift your spirit up.
You will feel better.

(((((HUGS)))))

I didn't want to get involved in this but I'd like to say one thing.

If you see ugly things being said to you or someone else, don't respond. I sometimes think that certain people get off on being in the midst of conflict.

NO, I'm not calling anybody out on here. Just saying...........generally speaking.

For instance: If you were walking down the street and someone called you a fat, ugly b*tch would you engage with them? No, you'd walk away.

CW and Polarbear are right! But it is so hard because like Worried I got a rude pm last night so I had to turn off my pm again. And really, isn't Worried right if it quacks like a duck and walks like a duck, it must be a duck!

I should have followed Polarbear off that thread (in the beginning) and never went back on it! That is my fault and I won't make that mistake again! I will remember the nice people I have met here and keep it moving! Not leaving the site just not replying to threads that some people are on because that is all I did--answer a question and h3ll had no feary and I don't even understand how Worried got rolled into it😵

All I was trying to do is answer a post then it turn into a tug-a-war and I fell into it and again that was my bad!

But in truth, I can try to avoid some people, but if they keep changing their names then I am not sure what to do if I don't know it is them on a thread!

It is just upsetting-all of it!!

I don't like people that hid behind a screen and bad mouth people just because they have nothing better to do! And yes, I know we all are behind a screen, but most of us are trying to help not hurt people!

But like Dr. Plil says, "you can't reason with crazy."

And if people don't want to be called a troll then don't act like one!!!

Shell, by the way I tried to thank-you privately for your nice PM to me last night but since you've turned your PM access off I couldn't do it privately.

So thank-you!

Your welcome! I had to turn off my pm again!


Hugs!!

On my mind -saddened but I understand the need to clear the air.  And on one discussion awhile ago, I did call someone I'd never heard of a Troll.  Sorry, and lucky I wasn't attacked. I have truly appreciated all the help, support, suggestions I see to me, and to others, that I can use.  When I am exhausted and raw, I can take very little criticism.

So onward, and I'll use some of the poop in my garden, where it will do some good.  We used to feed young sickly tomato plants manure tea to make them stronger.

Comment to me all you want.  I just had time off.  Son from Cal. was here a week, I probably already talked about it, but can't remember!  Sleep well. People care about you.

How do you go about getting a drug DNA test? I think it would be interesting to find out which meds I have potential adverse reactions to, which would be ineffective, etc. I didn't know there was such a thing. There are only a couple of drugs I'm allergic to that I know of, one being an antibiotic, the other being a medication that I was given in the hospital to stop postpartum hemorraging.

With the last one, the reaction was pretty serious, almost like an anaphylactic one, where my heart was racing and I was short of breath. I thought it was because of the bleeding and so did the nurse, but it was determined that it was the med, as my blood counts were somewhat low, but not severe enough to cause shock. At any rate, would have been nice to know what meds to watch out for as it was a pretty scary experience.

Frazzled I can relate to your scary experience. My experience with Lyrica was very frightening. I was sure I was having a stroke. I lay on the floor on my knees hugging myself and taking deep breaths when it happened. Never again I hope.

My doctor was completely unmoved when I described the experience to him. Gee, what ever happened to bedside manner. Oh to have Marcus Welby as my GP.

Does anyone else remember him or am I dating myself?

Daughter 1 loves Gray's Anatomy (Daughter is now having trouble adapting to Sandra Oh as a back-office intelligence officer forced into a pas de deux with a psychopathic assassin in 'Killing Eve'). I was more of a Chicago Hope gal myself! - sigh, a young Mandy Patinkin as the brilliant but volatile surgeon, could there be better casting?

All those brilliant US series, and what do we get? "Casualty." Call that escapism? - 'cos I don't. Dilapidated sets, depressed staff and clinical equipment apparently bought in a job lot from Toys R Us, if I want to see that I can just nip down to my local hospital.

I was reading about drug DNA testing just the other day Frazzled, this is the company I found:

https://www.mydna.life/en-us/

I remember Marcus Welby M.D.~
And I did have a couple of great doctor's like him through the years where they'd spend the time and really care about my health,but not anymore.Now I'm just herded through like a bunch of cows.

FrazzledMama, my primary doctor had recommended the drug DNA testing. I guessed my Medicare paid for this test as I never received a bill for it.

How I wished my parents were alive to have taken the same test. It would have been interesting to see if we had the same results.

DNA testing for drug effectiveness and interaction. What a great thing. Though hope we all have lived cleanly and not committed any felonies where our DNA would have been held in some evidence locker for the past 40-60 years!😉

And to help authorities to break decades old crimes as a result. Imagine. Wonder when the show will be cast and broadcast.

Grannie,, I am from Amish country,, growing up. I so remember manure tea being used by them to water the tomatoes! Those were some dang good tomatoes!

Speaking of TV doctors.... my major crush was Dr. Kildare :)

I remember Dr. Kildare, but didn't watch, I think past my bedtime😉. I do also remember, mom loved him and Bonanza. That was her time, don't bug me.

pamzi - Are you Amish? I don't know of any Amish. What I know of Amish life style I learned from watching TV. I have a question for you. How do Amish people take care of their elderly? Do the caregivers have the same burn out problems like people on this site do?

My TV doctor crush was Chad Everett - I can't remember much about the show but I know he made a handsome doctor!