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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I've never been one to really "want" anything for Christmas, especially since my children left the nest, because then if I wanted something, I just went out and got it. However this year, after losing my husband, and caregiving for him for years, and all this Covid crap, I am really feeling the need for a nice vacation, to just get away from everything. So I would say that what I want for Christmas this year, is a really nice vacation. Merry Christmas Everyone!!!
Glad, good question, and a nice diversion from caregiving topics.
Highest desire would be global - peace, Covid vaccines that really work and don't have side effects, especially for those with allergies that cause anaphylaxis. At the same level would be an end to the political games and focus on what those people were elected to do: represent us and not manipulate for power.
Realistically, I've decided I need some motivation to get moving. So I'm buying a new pair of ballet slippers (not toe shoes) to encourage me. Just wearing them makes me feel more confident and graceful.
And since I'm I'm buying for myself, I can be greedy, so I'm buying sheet music for some of my favorite music. But I have to go through my inventory first b/c some of the scores on my list are in my existing library; I haven't played in so long I've forgotten what I had.
Perhaps the most desirable would be John Lennon and Yoko Ono's Give Peace a Chance. A lot of politicians could benefit from heeding this advice.
Oh, and perhaps most important, I need to get a new car. Mine has holes in the floor, is rusting out, and I'm leary about driving it in snow or rain b/c of the backsplash. I just absolutely hate shopping for a car.
Barb, how did you find your personal trainer? Do you interview, discuss training plans, etc.? I've wondered how this works.
I want a one story house with a screen-in porch and it should have lots of land and a pond. This way I can have two donkeys, chickens, ducks and a dog to go with my kitties. I also want some furit trees and a garden. And seems how I am going all out, I want to live in a warmer state as well!! A girl can have a dream! That's mine!!
However, I would just be happy to not live with my mother anymore, whatever that should look like...
I want my husband to be well enough after chemo treatment to take a small trip and not have to worry about his immune system and covid. I want the drama and histrionics of moving my sister to assisted living to be over. I want a little peace and relaxation where I can concentrate on my own health (recurrent bladder cancer, recurrent lung cancer, and NA Cirrhosis of the Liver.) I want more years with my husband. 44 is not enough, I am greedy.
Just 1 day of peace with my bipolar, narcissistic wife, who also has advanced vascular dementia.. Just 1 day when no matter what I do, it's never good enough. Just 1 day without some kind of a complaint, without demeaning remarks. I have been doing all of the laundry, cooking, cleaning, yardwork, and raising our now 18 Y/O son for at least 14 years.
No, I not asking for 3 or 4 days, just 1 total. I am her primary caretaker, and she NEVER see's anything good in what I do. If she wakes me at 3:00 a.m. to change her diaper, I didn't get up fast enough.( I 66 Y/O with chronic back pain since an injury in 1996, so I move slowly.) When I bring her a meal, it is either too hot or not hot enough, too much salt or not enough, to spicy or not enough spices.
She has been begging to try going without her catheter since June. I got her Dr. to agree to her going to a urologist to be tested to see if she can GO with the catheter> Guess what? I didn't make it happen fast enough! She doesn't think I worked hard enough to get the referral set up or the Dr's appointment soon enough.( How am I supposed change the Dr's appointments so that they can fit her in tomorrow?
No wait, I don't need a whole day. How about just one, you can count that on your pinky finger, just 1 small Thank for all the work I do.
I want to go away for a week all by myself -- to Disney World. To be in the bubble where everything is happy and peaceful and music plays all around me and I can take my time to savor the experience. A trip where I don't have to look for the next beer, the next bathroom, the next sit-down seafood meal. In fact, I've promised myself that if I am still young enough after he is gone, I am selling the house, buying a little camper, and hitting the road. Florida will be destination #1 and then from there I will travel the country and visit all my online friends who have kept me sane for the last 20+ years.
Be kind to yourself first, understand that we are human and can only do so much. It’s really tough when LO don’t show appreciation and gratitude as much as we’d like, or need. Remember that our LO are also experiencing stress, fear, pain, anxiousness and exhaustion. They often lash out at us b/c it’s safe to (we’re family). That doesn’t make it ok; it complicates the heck out of things, but it’s why we take the brunt of it sometimes. So do what you can, but remember you have to care for yourself first and foremost- whether it’s making some time for the little things, or doing something on a grander scale. We WILL make it and live our lives with compassion, kindness and some mistakes along the way, but we WILL MAKE IT!!
God bless all of you. You make me smile; sometimes a happy smile, sometimes a sad smile. I read every day how you are all coping in your day-to-day lives and pray for each and every one of you. All I want for Christmas is time. Time to be with my husband, time to relax, time to enjoy the quiet. Love you all!
I want to cruise again. A nice 12-night cruise where Covid-19 is a thing of the past. I want Christmas dinner to be one where my daughters are not snarky with comments. I want to finally start working on my scrapbook and have my granddaughter do it with me. I want my mother to have a pain free day. Like you all, more stuff, I don't need.
If I am going to dream BIG If I am going to be selfish then I want to re do my bathroom, that also means having the floors redone in the house. (open concept ranch). And since the house is handicap accessible I want the floors one of the engineered ones that can remain wet for 24 hours. And since the floors and the bathroom are going to be done I would have to paint the house (inside).
If I am going to dream BIG If I am not going to be selfish..then I want the COVID vaccine to work. I want to not have to wear a mask. I want to get back to my "real" routine of volunteering for Hospice.
If I just want a regular what do I want for Christmas wish then I really do not want anything, I don't truly need anything My wish then would be for ................ I have been sitting here trying to think of something I want and I really can't think of a thing I need. (other than to lose the COVID 19 that I have put on)
When my husband and I took care of my mom with Alzheimer's, it was the little things that meant a lot. I even wrote a book about our travails: "My Mother Has Alzheimer's and My Dog Has Tapeworms: A Caregiver's Tale." So here, I'll tweak the lyrics of "On the Twelve Days of Christmas" to highlight some of these things: "On the 12 days of Christmas, my true love gave to me: coffee in a mug, a gentle, knowing hug, he helped me watch my mom, which helped me be nice and calm, he'd watch her for an hour, so I could take a shower, he gave me an understanding wink, and flowers that were pink, he watched her while I was mopping, and when I'd go shopping, he was thoughtful and kind, which gave me peace of mind. and an ink "cartridge" in a pear tree. The cartridge was so I could write my book, I'd rather write than cook. Happy Holidays everyone.
I have my Christmas present. My mom is out of quarantine today. She didn't catch the virus from the caregiver who had it. Her caregivers no longer have to wear whole hazmat looking outfits to go into her room. Mom can leave her room now, though she still can't leave the home. My husband and I will have a window opening of presents with her tomorrow. She can watch us and we can watch her. She's actually been great during her quarantine. I see her through the window every day and can tell she is well cared for.
Calmness in our country. Love for one another, curb the anger, angry words. End to the Covid Virus and for people to take preventive measures until the vaccine can be administered. Food and warmth for those in need. A loving and secure home for all children so they can grow up to be kind adults. For children to have proper nourishment and education so they can grow up to be the future teachers, engineers, Doctors, scientists, etc. Not to be discouraged but to aim high and move ahead. For us all to see even our little blessings, the sun, trees, birds, music. Big hugs to all.
Just one day when I feel calm, no anxiety nibbling 'round the edges of my mind. A clean house (hahahahahahahaha) and sweet hugs and snuggles from my grands.
A nice note or card from my DH in his OWN WRITING that tells me he loves me and is grateful for me in his life.
For the TV in our bedroom to break and Dh to ask me to 'come and sleep by him'.
The Five Nights At Freddy's games, Bendy And The Ink Machine games, Danganronpa games, Doki Doki Literature Club, Yandere Simulator, Baldi's Basics, Totono, & Tattletail. Just get me video games and I'll be happy. XD
All y'all are asking for simple things like peace and quiet. I feel kinda selfish now. Oof.
My personal wishes would be for my mom to be able to live independently again (yes, sitting all day really is bad for you- that's why she is in the shape she's in- that's a whole other post) and for her to have an actual social life. I have been wishing for years to have a property with lots of land and a fresh water source- ideally on a mountain- so I can work on my small business I want to start- all natural products, things made from reclaimed wood, etc. and to start a food ministry.
Thanks for posting and asking this question. I have really enjoyed reading everyone's answers!!
Pronker, do you have an Aldi's store near you? They don't carry the famous See's Candies (which are truly a chocolate lover's nirvana), but they do carry Austrian chocolates. They're definitely worth the nominal cost, sometimes about 1/2 the cost of typical, standard brands offered in stores.
Besides world peace or Jesus returning, like a lot of folks, I want what I can't afford. :-) I want a small house/townhome with a small fenced yard so I can have a dog. We live in Iowa in a rental without a fenced yard, and I am not taking a dog out in our -40 degree wind chill days. I would love to get a cat, but my husband is allergic to them. I really need a pet. We have always had dogs up until our two beloved dogs had to be put to sleep 4 years ago before we moved here. We had a GSP and a black Lab. The Lab was my soul-doggie, if there is such a thing, and I still cry when I think about her.
However, considering what so many others here have to deal with, I have it pretty easy. Hoping everyone here has a Merry Christmas and blessings in the New Year, and that you all get what you want for Christmas.
I got some long awaited blessings this year. A real kitchen with counters ( goodbye tables) and a guy who knew how to knock out a wall and open up the room. The state restrictions on visiting got me out of a yearly "away from home" Thanksgiving commitment and having my mother here for Christmas Day to harp on her her health. In fact after 20 plus years of buying her gifts for my children ( and me stupidly letting her give the best of the gifts on my list) she finally just sent money for the children to have and spend themselves. What a burden lifted. So i certainly wish blessings on all caregivers, especially the unappreciated ones.
Speaking of panini press, do check out a company called Lekue...I believe they may have Spanish roots, but they make a press you can put in the microwave. They use a lot of heavy, safe silicone and I have enjoyed their bowls and containers for steaming items...does a really nice job. There are lots of videos showing the press and how it works... Right now my mother with alleged dementia (very hard to believe when she is capable of ripping off notes that say NOT YOURS DO NOT TOUCH), is throwing down the drain my freshly brewed iced tea that is causing me great frustration especially when my energy is not at 100% as I recuperate from major surgery. So I would like an electrician to totally rewire our older home, so I could feel safe about installing a mini-fridge in my locked bedroom, and know there wasn't a fire risk. I also would adore a dishwasher, and failing that, a housekeeper who would make the multiple trips needed to take down to the kitchen the load of used cups and mugs and bowls on my dresser top to get them washed!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I also got myself a personal trainer at the Y, which is what led to the SmartWatch.
Taking care of my physical health is going to be my "job" from now on.
Highest desire would be global - peace, Covid vaccines that really work and don't have side effects, especially for those with allergies that cause anaphylaxis. At the same level would be an end to the political games and focus on what those people were elected to do: represent us and not manipulate for power.
Realistically, I've decided I need some motivation to get moving. So I'm buying a new pair of ballet slippers (not toe shoes) to encourage me. Just wearing them makes me feel more confident and graceful.
And since I'm I'm buying for myself, I can be greedy, so I'm buying sheet music for some of my favorite music. But I have to go through my inventory first b/c some of the scores on my list are in my existing library; I haven't played in so long I've forgotten what I had.
Perhaps the most desirable would be John Lennon and Yoko Ono's Give Peace a Chance. A lot of politicians could benefit from heeding this advice.
Oh, and perhaps most important, I need to get a new car. Mine has holes in the floor, is rusting out, and I'm leary about driving it in snow or rain b/c of the backsplash. I just absolutely hate shopping for a car.
Barb, how did you find your personal trainer? Do you interview, discuss training plans, etc.? I've wondered how this works.
However, I would just be happy to not live with my mother anymore, whatever that should look like...
I want my husband to be successful at beating his cancer.
I want my cousin and niece to beat Covid. My niece is in Georgia and my cousin is in D.C.
They aren’t doing so well at the moment.
I always want the very best for my daughters.
I’m ready for 2020 to end. Out with the old year and in with the new year!
Happy Holidays, everyone!
It makes me feel better knowing people are pulling for them.
I appreciate your kindness and warmth.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
No, I not asking for 3 or 4 days, just 1 total. I am her primary caretaker, and she NEVER see's anything good in what I do. If she wakes me at 3:00 a.m. to change her diaper, I didn't get up fast enough.( I 66 Y/O with chronic back pain since an injury in 1996, so I move slowly.) When I bring her a meal, it is either too hot or not hot enough, too much salt or not enough, to spicy or not enough spices.
She has been begging to try going without her catheter since June. I got her Dr. to agree to her going to a urologist to be tested to see if she can GO with the catheter> Guess what? I didn't make it happen fast enough! She doesn't think I worked hard enough to get the referral set up or the Dr's appointment soon enough.( How am I supposed change the Dr's appointments so that they can fit her in tomorrow?
No wait, I don't need a whole day. How about just one, you can count that on your pinky finger, just 1 small Thank for all the work I do.
Well I got that off my chest anyway!!!
I want Christmas dinner to be one where my daughters are not snarky with comments.
I want to finally start working on my scrapbook and have my granddaughter do it with me. I want my mother to have a pain free day. Like you all, more stuff, I don't need.
If I am going to be selfish then I want to re do my bathroom, that also means having the floors redone in the house. (open concept ranch). And since the house is handicap accessible I want the floors one of the engineered ones that can remain wet for 24 hours. And since the floors and the bathroom are going to be done I would have to paint the house (inside).
If I am going to dream BIG
If I am not going to be selfish..then I want the COVID vaccine to work. I want to not have to wear a mask. I want to get back to my "real" routine of volunteering for Hospice.
If I just want a regular what do I want for Christmas wish then I really do not want anything, I don't truly need anything My wish then would be for ................
I have been sitting here trying to think of something I want and I really can't think of a thing I need. (other than to lose the COVID 19 that I have put on)
Just one day when I feel calm, no anxiety nibbling 'round the edges of my mind. A clean house (hahahahahahahaha) and sweet hugs and snuggles from my grands.
A nice note or card from my DH in his OWN WRITING that tells me he loves me and is grateful for me in his life.
For the TV in our bedroom to break and Dh to ask me to 'come and sleep by him'.
I'm pretty easy. As most of us are!
All y'all are asking for simple things like peace and quiet. I feel kinda selfish now. Oof.
Thanks for posting and asking this question. I have really enjoyed reading everyone's answers!!
However, considering what so many others here have to deal with, I have it pretty easy. Hoping everyone here has a Merry Christmas and blessings in the New Year, and that you all get what you want for Christmas.
The state restrictions on visiting got me out of a yearly "away from home" Thanksgiving commitment and having my mother here for Christmas Day to harp on her her health. In fact after 20 plus years of buying her gifts for my children ( and me stupidly letting her give the best of the gifts on my list) she finally just sent money for the children to have and spend themselves. What a burden lifted.
So i certainly wish blessings on all caregivers, especially the unappreciated ones.
Right now my mother with alleged dementia (very hard to believe when she is capable of ripping off notes that say NOT YOURS DO NOT TOUCH), is throwing down the drain my freshly brewed iced tea that is causing me great frustration especially when my energy is not at 100% as I recuperate from major surgery. So I would like an electrician to totally rewire our older home, so I could feel safe about installing a mini-fridge in my locked bedroom, and know there wasn't a fire risk. I also would adore a dishwasher, and failing that, a housekeeper who would make the multiple trips needed to take down to the kitchen the load of used cups and mugs and bowls on my dresser top to get them washed!