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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
If they are "true" friends you won't need to give them any advice as I'm sure they already know their friend has dementia and will act and say things accordingly. And if it makes you feel better you can put her calls on speaker so if your wife can't respond properly you can jump in to do so. Also you can keep any visits short if necessary. Your wife will let you know if she's enjoying the visits or not. Be grateful that your wife still has friends that want to be apart of her life. Please don't keep them a way.
I just had a conversation about this with my mom’s respite caregiver, who has a lot of experience with dementia. Her advice was to let people know mom has dementia, she still loves to talk to her friends, but she finds it stressful to be asked questions that require factual recall (when is so and so’s birthday, etc), or to be given open ended choices (what do you want to eat?). She enjoys being asked her opinion about things, and talking about the old days. The caregiver likened this to prepping someone for a play date when your child has special needs. It’s not gossiping, it’s preparing a comfortable experience for all parties.
I agree with Mayday that you should be certain that visits will be a good thing for your LO. Try not to project your desires for what her life "should" be like onto her. Dementia changes all of that.
If you think your LO will enjoy the visits, make sure these friends understand the best ways to engage her. A visit may be "better" than a call in regards to your wife's ablity to understand who is calling and why. You will need to decide if having more than one visitor at a time will be good for your wife. Your LO might repeat herself often or ask the same questions so her friends will need to be given strategies on how to deal with this possible challenge. Also, to not say things like "Remember when..." or "Do you remember...?" etc.
If you have old photo albums maybe she'd enjoy going through them with her friends, go for a walk, eat out (or at home, whichever is less stressful for her). If she remembers how to play any card or board games (as long as friends are flexible with rules she might forget), etc.
Just because someone is a friend doesn't mean they'll understand what dementia does to a person's mind and ability to socialize. If they're anything like me, it will take them a while to stop reacting to her as if she's her prior, fully-cognitive self. We take for granted simple things in relationships, so giving her friends a little help to make the visit be more enjoyable for all will bless everyone.
Not too many friends at one time. Too overwhelming. My Mom was good for about an hour. Ask them not to expect too much interchange between them and Mom. Short sentences and no long explanation. Do not ask "Do you remember me?" Tell them just to say "Hi, its me Jane"
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
how does she feel?
my spouse doesn’t want any visitors nor talk on phone. Won’t even pick up to call anyone.
it’s sad.. it’s very sad.., thst isolates me as well..
And if it makes you feel better you can put her calls on speaker so if your wife can't respond properly you can jump in to do so.
Also you can keep any visits short if necessary. Your wife will let you know if she's enjoying the visits or not.
Be grateful that your wife still has friends that want to be apart of her life. Please don't keep them a way.
has dementia, she still loves to talk to her friends, but she finds it stressful to be asked questions that require factual recall (when is so and so’s birthday, etc), or to be given open ended choices (what do you want to eat?). She enjoys being asked her opinion about things, and talking about the old days. The caregiver likened this to prepping someone for a play date when your child has special needs. It’s not gossiping, it’s preparing a comfortable experience for all parties.
If you think your LO will enjoy the visits, make sure these friends understand the best ways to engage her. A visit may be "better" than a call in regards to your wife's ablity to understand who is calling and why. You will need to decide if having more than one visitor at a time will be good for your wife. Your LO might repeat herself often or ask the same questions so her friends will need to be given strategies on how to deal with this possible challenge. Also, to not say things like "Remember when..." or "Do you remember...?" etc.
If you have old photo albums maybe she'd enjoy going through them with her friends, go for a walk, eat out (or at home, whichever is less stressful for her). If she remembers how to play any card or board games (as long as friends are flexible with rules she might forget), etc.
Just because someone is a friend doesn't mean they'll understand what dementia does to a person's mind and ability to socialize. If they're anything like me, it will take them a while to stop reacting to her as if she's her prior, fully-cognitive self. We take for granted simple things in relationships, so giving her friends a little help to make the visit be more enjoyable for all will bless everyone.