At random times during the day, I have these anxiety attacks at times. It's not when there is a crisis. Then I'm fine since there's action that needs to be taken. It's the in between times. It's the anxiety about what could happen that does it. I just find myself with a loudly beating heart and cold with fear.
It may take awhile to find one that works for you. It also helps with my depression, since my MIL lives with us now.
My good friend is caring for her younger sister in her home with Downs and recently developed dementia. The dementia totally changed her sister’s personality and behavior. I have no idea how my friend is able to be so patient. She has her hands full! She does have help now. Hospice. She will take breaks and leaves the house. She is an avid reader, always has been and she will go pick out a book from a bookstore to buy.
My friend is single so obviously she has to work full time to support herself. She has caregivers through hospice that are incredible! She has a hospice nurse and social worker. Her other sister cared for her at first but it became too much for her because she is married with kids and placed her in a facility. The facility did not work out and somehow my friend’s sister ended up escaping the facility. They couldn’t find her for a very long time. Fortunately, at the time she didn’t have the dementia and was fairly high functioning and when someone found her she told them her name.
They were able to track down my friend and she moved her into her home. The dementia was very upsetting. She no longer walks, in wheelchair, in diapers, was aggressive at times, eats again now but had stopped eating, no longer speaks, etc. She has to be on certain meds. So strange to see how dementia effects certain people. She is 51 years old. My friend says she probably doesn’t have too much time left.
She has a blanket with all of these gadgets on it. She fiddles around with it. Can someone explain how this works? Just curious.
Im also looking for answers, concerning elder law (power of attorney, will, house in his name)
Looking at Grouphomes.for my Husband of 30 years. He is 87.
Daily problem I'm having is ;
Panic/fright first thing in the am.
The weight is the heaviest on me
In the middle of the night '3am',
And when I open my eyes first thing in the morning. The thought of starting another day is hard.
By noon I'm much better, and the rest of the day/evening are tolerable. I'm considering getting a Life Coach. The $$ spent might be worth the peace of mind.
I suppose that happens in a lot of different circumstances, quakes, fires, volcanoes, floods, tsunamis, tornadoes and most especially crimes, we have high crime here. My daughter was attacked. The guy pushed her down on the sidewalk, she cracked a bone near her eye. He stole her purse. She’s always looking around in her surroundings and gets panic attacks. Happens in good neighborhoods too. Not just bad areas of the city. She was on St. Charles Ave in a beautiful section of the city.
It’s horrible for areas with school shootings and terrorist attacks.
All of us have lived through very difficult and challenging situations. Do you think that society is coping better or worse in these times? Throughout history there have been awful circumstances that created all kinds of problems for people. Interesting to ponder...People back then didn’t have the aid of psych drugs, support groups, etc. Must have been brutal for them. Yet, their outlook seemed to be different, don’t you think?
Yeah. When you need relief from the bad anxiety, there's nothing quite as helpful imo than benzodiazepines.
I was prescribed ativan, the lowest dose and Effexor, lowest dose. I've been really trying to wean off of them cause they can really mess you up and you lose the ability to cope naturally which isn't good.
This whole business with my brother has raised a lot of the issues that were prevalent when my mom was in nursing care. My family just seems to scatter. No one communicates properly. It's like dealing with a bunch of children truly.
Sendme, a valuable contributor on here gave me some good advice. She said "don't go through your siblings for info. on your brother. Communicate with the hospital and doctors/nurses directly." That's what I've been doing and it works for me. They all have phones and they can do the same.
Cause dealing with sibs really raise the anxiety issues for me.
I remembered another time. After Dad passed away a day or two after the funeral my sister and our husbands decided to clear out Dad’s apartment rather than pay for the next months rent. I had basically same symptoms. Queasy, sweaty, confused, tight chest. I hadn’t eaten in who knows when, I had been surviving on coffee mostly. Anyway, they got me out of Dads apartment. I started feeling better, then I ate and recovered completely.
It's interesting. I wonder if it was my brain or body that was overloaded or both?
My body and brain doesn’t seem to have the tolerance for stress that it once had, before caregiving. When my life gets stressful I wake up at 3:30am. It’s always 3:30am. Sometimes I can go back to sleep, sometimes I can’t.
I know that exercise has helped me. And I think the psilocybin regimen I did helped, too. It would be great if I could quit drinking alcohol altogether since it raises cortisol levels, but that might be asking too much of myself right now. lol
The withdrawal from benzos is difficult, agree. Are you familiar with The Ashton Manual? I followed it and maybe it helped..? Also there's an online forum for support while w/d from benzos, appropriately named Benzo Buddies. I joined at one time but found I didn't participate all that much. They had a nice community there, as I recall.
I tried a lot of supplements while I was withdrawing -- ashwaghanda, 5 HTP, all the usual things. I think just having something else, besides the benzos, to turn to is helpful. Deep breathing always helped in a pinch. Good luck, Gershun. You'll get through it. I don't envy you, though. 💜
I thought I was going to pass out tonight.
Let me set the scene. Grandma likes to tuck away food in random places and eat it later. Last night she was gnawing on something that I remember giving her 2 days ago. Let's say it shouldn't be left out of the fridge. I grabbed it out of her hands and told her to spit it out. She looked me in the eye with that "go <you know what> youself" look on her face. She swallows it and opens her mouth to show me she has. I tell her she's going to get diarrhea. She did. Started early this morning. I'll leave out the gory details of that disaster. In itself, that's another post. I've changed her diaper 5 times so far today. That's been my day.
So tonight at around 8pm, I smell a scent coming off of grandma from the other side of the living room. When that happens, there's been overflow. So I get up to deal with that. At the same time, the dog starts whining because she needs to go outside. All day long, as usual, dad's been in his chair with his feet up watching TV without a care in the world. All this while I've been dealing with diarrhea grandma, stubborn mom and a very geriatric dog. I've also been dealing with residue business issues. Reviewing contracts when I'm being interrupted every five minutes makes me feel like my head is about to explode. I'll admit it, I was irritated. I raised my voice and asked him to deal with the dog. His response was "IT'S ALWAYS MY FAULT!". Then the yelling began. He ended up marching off to lock himself in the bathroom. All this sets off mom who starts yelling. Grandma is leaking. The dog is whining. For a few seconds, I got lightheaded, my vision tunneled and a swayed a bit. I thought I was going to pass out. I clinched and strained to drive more blood into my brain until it passed.
Now the old people are asleep, including the dog. Turns out she really needed to poop too. Took a while to get dad out of the restroom. I had to do the nightly dance to get mom to brush her teeth. Grandma got changed again. I'm wearing my workout shorts and t-shirt from when I was able to workout since I have no clothes left. Let's say changing grandma involves a bit of poop transference and I've had to change my clothes 5 times. The washing machine has been cranking washing their clothes so mine will have to wait until tomorrow.
I don't feel half bad right now. I realize that's mostly because I've guzzled down a beer. I still have contracts to deal with but I'm thinking the early caregiver heart attack will take care of things before any of that will be a problem. I'll just let the beer do it's work until grandma needs another diaper. I should have a couple of hours before that happens.
I couldn't do all yo do! You are amazing!
My mom is just sooo forgetful. Not flushing the toilet, either using no toilet paper or way to much.
My husband is no help. He just goes outside to his shop. I have to work the evening shift
So much anxiety. He checks on her every so often. But I am so afraid.
She puts dirty dishes in the D/W
after they just been run, I can't keep up. She's now hiding her clothes and wearing them up to 3x.
Jjust feel so overwhelmed and alone. EXAUSTED IN PA !!!
Now plumbing issues.
Help.
good terry you made the bed/ good terry you paid a bill/ good terry you went to the grocery/ good terry you flushed the toilet/ good terry you took a shower.
Well you get the idea.
I was going through a rough patch with anxiety attacks some time ago and posted about it here on AC. A couple of users sent private messages to tell me their coping strategies, and one advised reassuring myself that things are ok. I think reassuring ourselves that we're okay, and encouraging ourselves to keep going on some small tasks even when we're feeling out of sorts, is a great coping tool.
When I was going through a period of waking up at night, specifically waking up in panic, I researched online to see what could be causing it. The best I could come up with is that high cortisol/stress hormone levels at nighttime can cause you to jerk awake. I think everyone experiences this once in a while, but to be experiencing it often may mean you're under too much stress and would benefit from SSRI or other anti-anxiety medication. In my case, starting regular exercise seemed to help with all my anxiety-related symptoms, but especially the sleep issues.
I've also learned it can happen when your thyroid is wacky or your other hormones are not balanced, so please get yourself a medical workup to rule a physical trigger out.
It's interesting how our body manifests these stress responses when something is physically wrong inside of us, or in our environment. It makes sense, of course, but also I think there's a weird disconnect in how these symptoms are treated by modern Psychiatry. Panic/anxiety disorder tends to be treated as brain chemistry gone askew all by itself with no known cause, instead of always screening for other causes first.
In fact do you have any help? Are there any plans for grandma to be placed? You need to care for yourself.
For years I was a pharmaceutical rep in medical schools and research hospitals and saw first hand that doctors are trained to prescribe drugs drugs drugs. Though certain drugs save lives, overall we take way more than we probably need instead of using less damaging remedies.