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My 77 year old, with dementia, and is mentally handicap, sister doesn’t want to eat and doesn’t seem to know how to use the utensils either.
I’m wonder if there is an organization with volunteers that would go into the nursing facility to help these folks to eat. The CNAs have to much to do and too many patients to care for and can’t feed all that need help.
I can’t go do this for her. I have been timing my visits at meal time but can only get there 2 to 3 times a week.



Any suggestions?

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It is unacceptable that there is no one to feed those that can not feed themselves.
When my Husband was in rehab there was a separate room (unfortunately called the "Feeding Room") and staff would help the residents that were placed there.
The facility should have staff help those that need it.
You should not have to ask to find volunteers that would do that. I am guessing that the facility would not allow it just in case someone were to choke. (I volunteer at a Hospice and in order to help a patient eat we have to have specific training)
I think in your case you need to become a "squeaky wheel" to get your sister the help she needs.
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anonymous1732518 Sep 2023
If the facility is short staffed, like many are, that could be a possibility
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Not really. This is the nightmare situation of every facility I am aware of. Too many to feed and too few workers; and there are few volunteers for this heavy duty. There is also the liability of people who must be fed in a certain manner as many swallow deficit problems are involved.
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The IL's nursing home seated the people who needed assistance eating in one area which helped - is your nursing home doing that now?
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I think that at least 25% of the people in my mom's nursing home needed assistance in eating, either prompting or being directly fed. Those needing help were grouped together in the dining room and one aid oversaw each table of four, all aids in the facility were in the dining room and when short staffed often the RN would help as well. I tried to be there for at least one meal per day but it's not like mom would have starved without me, good facilities do know how to handle it.
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anonymous1732518 Sep 2023
Speech therapists can help as well
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You stated your sister "...doesn't want to eat..."

They legally cannot force her to eat. They can spend only so much time and staff to coax her only so much and then they have to go tend to the other residents, due to chronic staffing shortages.

Maybe contact churches and other faith-based organizations near her facility to see if they have a Care Ministry. Then explain your needs and see if they are willing to solicit for volunteers from their church. You don't have to be a member or even a believer.

If you have a local senior center, contact them, or your local Area Agency on Aging for possible other resources.
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When my LO was in rehab, I was there for dinner every night. I helped him by cutting his food, refilling water glass, etc. I also helped others in this way. Even placing utensils close or in their hands can be a big help for those with limited ability. There might be another patient’s family member who could do these things to help sister (but not actually feed her because special training is needed for that). See if you can find one.
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I asked the hospice nurse to put a doctors order in to the NH that aunt needed help. They have been feeding her since. They are extremely understaffed but they get it done.
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