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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Your mom has dementia. I'm assuming that your brother lived with her until he became ill and had to enter a nursing home due to his illness. Now your mom is missing him and wants him to come back home. You're wondering if your brother should move out of the nursing home and back in with your mom.
If your brother were to move back in with your mother who would take care of him? Since your mom has dementia she isn't able to care for him. I'm also assuming that since he moved into a nursing home he needs around the clock care. Who would provide that if he moved back with your mom and can your brother afford that kind of care?
I'm sure your mom misses him and her dementia probably doesn't allow her to critically analyze the situation, that her son is ill and needs around the clock care. She just misses him and wants him back and that's all she understands. Can someone take her to visit him? Can they talk on the phone? Maybe someone can pick out a nice Christmas card for her to sign and send to him.
Based only on what you've told us my answer to your question would be no, your brother shouldn't go back and live with your mom who has dementia unless he can afford in home care and his illness allows it. I wonder why he moved to a nursing home to begin with and has his medical condition improved enough for him to return home to his mother's?
zeenna2002, I was wondering since your brother was taking care of his Mom, was his illness related to the stress of being a 24/7 caregiver? Not to panic you, but 40% of caregivers die leaving behind the love ones they were taking care of.
I agree with Eyerishlass above, it would NOT be a good idea to bring your brother home. Your Mom, having dementia, would expect him to pick up where he had left off with the caregiving, and he can't.
It sounds like maybe your Mom need to hire caregivers to help her, or have her moved into Independent Living while she can still take care of herself, or into Assisted Living if she can't, if she can afford to do either.
Poor Mom! She misses her son. She misses the familiar way things used to be. This is very sad and I understand why you'd like to give her what she wants, but that isn't possible. You can't give her back her son the way he used to be any more than you can bring him back as a teenager. That part of Mom's past is over.
No, for all the reasons above, do not bring bro home to mom's. He needs to try to get feeling well enough so he can take care of himself. Maybe it is time to move mom? Do they have memory care where your bro is?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If your brother were to move back in with your mother who would take care of him? Since your mom has dementia she isn't able to care for him. I'm also assuming that since he moved into a nursing home he needs around the clock care. Who would provide that if he moved back with your mom and can your brother afford that kind of care?
I'm sure your mom misses him and her dementia probably doesn't allow her to critically analyze the situation, that her son is ill and needs around the clock care. She just misses him and wants him back and that's all she understands. Can someone take her to visit him? Can they talk on the phone? Maybe someone can pick out a nice Christmas card for her to sign and send to him.
Based only on what you've told us my answer to your question would be no, your brother shouldn't go back and live with your mom who has dementia unless he can afford in home care and his illness allows it. I wonder why he moved to a nursing home to begin with and has his medical condition improved enough for him to return home to his mother's?
I agree with Eyerishlass above, it would NOT be a good idea to bring your brother home. Your Mom, having dementia, would expect him to pick up where he had left off with the caregiving, and he can't.
It sounds like maybe your Mom need to hire caregivers to help her, or have her moved into Independent Living while she can still take care of herself, or into Assisted Living if she can't, if she can afford to do either.