I live alone with my parents who are 78 and 84 years old respectively. My father has no health issues he is extremely energetic and healthy, however my mother needs assistance for everything. My age is 33 and I have been taking care of them since I was 20. My problem is caregiver stress as my parents are difficult. My father has always been really strange he never tried to provide for us or cared about our emotional needs. All my life I saw him abusing our family. He still behaves the same way, only difference is that he has become more hyper and say more mean things. My mother was better than my father but believed in providing only basic needs to kids, now with aging she has become emotionally detached as well. When I started taking care of them, I decided to have a fresh start and do the best I could. They remain satisfied but would kept me on toes, my siblings also pressurize me not only to take care of parents but to fulfill their demands as well. All of this along with their insensitive responses gave me lot of emotional stress. As a result I got epileptic fit two weeks ago on major religious holiday when I had to take care of all arrangements. I have started medicine after consulting doctor but he said I need to sleep and my parents don't let what should I do. Also I think need to talk to someone at this point, like a need for compassion. Did anyone else go through it?
I'm just wondering if you have a supportive circle of friends, or maybe access to a religious adviser your parents respect who might "have a word" with them on your behalf or at least counsel you on how to go about changing what needs changing. Ignoring medical advice goes against scripture, doesn't it?
But that's only the immediate issue. What about your life, in the wider sense? What about careers and relationships and seeing a bit of the world, the things that are usually uppermost in a young person's mind?
After sleeping on her floor for 10 days- not really sleeping- I finally found her Power of Attorney and was able to force her to get treatment. She is SOOOO mad. She has two infections-her legs and urinary tract. I am also trying to work when I can. My advice to you is what every medical professional has given me this last week- take care of YOURSELF. Find out who has their Power of Attorney. If that hasn't been done delegate the task of having that done to one of your siblings. That is an absolute must. You also need to contact A Place For Mom- they are wonderful and will help the family scope out living facilities for your parents. It is time for you to manage your own health before any permanent damage is done. I wish you all the luck and strength to get through this.
You wouldn't be abandoning your parents, as they would still have children nearby.
Do you have to give all of your salary to your parents? Have you built up some savings that would enable you to make the break?
Did your parents ignore the offers of arranged marriage because they want to keep you at home taking care of them?
Interesting. Your English is excellent. Have you thought of looking at career opportunities in other countries?
As far as relationship are concerned while I was growing my family told me that I can only have arranged marriage and must never talk to a boy.But they never did anything for my marriage and refused to all 12 13 proposals that came on their own.I don't know what to about it too.
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