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I know my mom has been applying for credit cards with no idea of how she would pay them off. I think she's been denied for every one, but obviously she's been giving her SSN to God knows who. I have an ID manager through Farmer's insurance that I use to monitor stuff like this and there's been SEVERAL credit inquiries on my mom's side but now I see one for my dad. I know he's not been applying, and I'm worried my mom might be using his info.

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AJ, very calmly, perhaps having done an hour's breathing exercises beforehand, you're going to confront your mother about this. I wouldn't waste time on trying to conceal from her that you are aware of what she's been up to.

How's she accessing the applications, do you know?

Has anyone suggested any strategies to tackle her spending issues? - I assume there's no material need there, anything she's actually short of or asking for. It's just having the credit that she's hooked on?
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aj6044 Nov 2018
Well she does need things but I sure don't have any extra money and already paying for her storage unit and phone bill. She just likes to shop and always has and refuses to learn to live without just how I have to live without. She gets $60 allowance with Medicaid and with all her needs met at the NH thats going to have to be enough unless one of her many siblings wants to chip in but they won't.
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Have you spoken with your mother and “called” her on this? Asked her why? Does she need something that’s not being provided and she feels she needs to buy it herself? It’s difficult to give up financial independence even when on some level we know we are going to get into trouble and our child, as POA would do a better job managing them than we do. You need to be careful or she’ll revoke your POA.

Credit companies are being very very careful issuing cards now. Even when they do, they’ll give a credit limit of a few hundred dollars. A few even insist on their yearly fee being paid up front, and the annual fee is a high one.

Be kind but firm with your mother and tell her if she needs a day out to “fun shop” you can go together, but she needs to stop putting her personal info out there and explain to her why.
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aj6044 Nov 2018
Turns out a new account was opened in her name and she has no recollection of it. I opened a fraud investigation. My mom has a neuropsych evaluation soon and I know she will at least be found in need of a conservator. Her doctor told me I should remove myself from POA once a conservator is found.
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aj6044, it is easy to go on-line to "freeze" one's credit at the 3 major credit bureaus. I was able to do that with my parents as I was able to answer the security questions. I didn't even speak to a human, thus no one asked who I was or if I had a Power of Attorney.

And my parents didn't even know I did this. My Dad use to give out credit information who whomever called... yikes!! If for some reason they needed their credit viewed via the credit bureau, one can unfreeze the info for a week or whatever, then it automatically goes back to being frozen.

If your Mom complains she can't get such and such credit card, or whatever she is trying to purchase on credit, just tell her she is maxed out and just cannot get any more cards. You can use "therapeutic fibs" for situations such as this.
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Considering what you have previous said about your parents financial situation I doubt they would even be approved for a line of credit but you should still freeze their credit.
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Do you really need to keep up paying for storage? It doesn't seem likely she will return to a life that requires those items.
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Hmmmm.

This is just an idea, but as the child of a shopaholic I wonder - could you soothe your mother's cravings with paper catalogues, see if that helps keep her offline? She can even fill the order forms in and you can 'disappear' them discreetly into a 'pending' tray.

You might think there aren't so many of them around any more, but once your name's on somebody's mailing list there's no stopping them, I've found. I've registered with mail preference services and still get two a day.
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