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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Has there been a family discussion (you, husband, any other adult children of MIL's) about how to accomplish her current level of care and what the plan is going to be, going forward? Most of us start doing "little things" for an elder and suddenly, without much warning, the caregiving morphs into more than a full time job. At some point, the family, including your MIL if she's still compis mentis, needs to make a plan, taking into account MIL's resources and EVERYONE's needs. Quitting your job is hardly ever an option, unless you are independently wealthy, and even then, it doesn't feel like ANYONE should take on 24/7 caregiving. It's just not a feasible thing. So look at the resources and then contact local Council on Aging and find out what is around your area in terms of adult day care, senior centers and the like. Think about what her everyday needs are and what her "sometimes" needs are--like dr's appointments and the like. Talk to her doctor about an assessment of what her level of need is.
There are probably hundreds of answers to this question on this forum. Read through a bunch of these questions because the answers get repeated often. If you provide more details you will receive more detailed answers.
I agree with freqflyer, do NOT quit your job!! It's not the same as taking care of a toddler for a few years.....and 83 y.o. could easily live for another 15 years! Ask yourself, where would your career be then, in 15 years, with FT caregiving as the only thing on your resume?
Last year my Dad said it is time for me to retire from my career so that I can help him and Mom out [they still live in their single family home, I live down the street in my own home]. I looked at him and said "Dad, did you quit your job to care for your parents"..... he said *no*.... end of discussion.
But there still is that generation/gender gap... my Mom thinks I should be a *housewife* even though I never had children. My Dad thinks I should have quit work at 65 like he did. I had to explain to Dad that because I am a woman I still need to keep working for many more years to catch up to *his* retirement fund. Back in my era, even with a business college degree I was given clerical and/or secretarial positions, not management because those were positions only given to males.... [sigh]
What is your husband's suggestions as to his mother's care? If anyone should quit their job, it should be him.
When someone expects me to do something life changing, I reply "I couldn't possibly do that! But, I do think that you could."
Read all of the posts here about quiting jobs, trying to find a government agency to pay them, and 24/7 care of a relative. The search function is in the right hand corner. Good luck. We have all been in your place, to a certain extent.
I would drive my MIL crazy. She would not allow me to clean her, feed her, etc. She has her wits about her. You have a wonderful relationship with your MIL to even consider doing this.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
In a nut shell, do NOT quit your job. Other arrangements need to be made.
Keep your job. Solutions include Adult Day Health Center, bringing in a caregiver, or considering placement of MIL.
Last year my Dad said it is time for me to retire from my career so that I can help him and Mom out [they still live in their single family home, I live down the street in my own home]. I looked at him and said "Dad, did you quit your job to care for your parents"..... he said *no*.... end of discussion.
But there still is that generation/gender gap... my Mom thinks I should be a *housewife* even though I never had children. My Dad thinks I should have quit work at 65 like he did. I had to explain to Dad that because I am a woman I still need to keep working for many more years to catch up to *his* retirement fund. Back in my era, even with a business college degree I was given clerical and/or secretarial positions, not management because those were positions only given to males.... [sigh]
When someone expects me to do something life changing, I reply "I couldn't possibly do that! But, I do think that you could."
Read all of the posts here about quiting jobs, trying to find a government agency to pay them, and 24/7 care of a relative. The search function is in the right hand corner. Good luck. We have all been in your place, to a certain extent.