beckyl Asked January 2016
Easy crossword puzzles?
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Does anyone know of any websites that have easy crossword puzzle books for dementia patients? My mom used to love doing them, and still does on a good day. I got her a book that says "Easy" Crossword puzzles on the front, but she finds them difficult and frustrating. I did find the MindStart website and have ordered her a few things. I'd like her to have something to do to occupy her mind and time when I'm not there. Any suggestions?
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Becky, you can only do what you can do. In some senses, your mom is reaping the results of her difficult behavior throughout her life. It's not your responsibility to make her life today perfect. Do the best you can and let the rest go!
What IS working is having the aides and activities director say to her "Flo, now it's time to...." rather than "would you like to....". My mother has usually said "no" to anything offered, or sometimes shrugs. We decided that shrug could mean "yes" and SIL came up with the "Now it's time to" because mom is very compliant with what others "tell:" her to do.
It's working! She's been going to the movie, to the afternoon tea and to the "mocktail hour". It's amazing how changing the wording can change the response.
In most of the AL facilities that I visit, the majority have dementia. When my cousin went to Memory Care AL, the activities were a little different than at the regular AL, but are designed specifically for those with dementia.They include things like stretching, music, games, movies, etc. But still, if the resident refuses to participate, there is isn't much you can do.
I see one woman there always sitting with a word-find book. She is usually alone and oblivious to what is going on around her.
I'd say continue with the crosswords as long as Mom has any interest in it. If word-find is new to her, she may or may not be able to pick it up now. Worth a try.
My mother likes to color, as long as one of us sits with her and colors, too. It did not turn out to be an activity to keep her occupied when she is alone. And as to the very popular "adult" coloring books available now, the are absolutely not appropriate for someone with deteriorated motor skills, short attention spans, or dementia! I print images from the internet on card stock for my mother. We started with children's books which were the right challenge level, but not suitable topics.
She used to like watching television, but has apparently lost interest in that. What she always seems to be doing when I come to visit is reading magazines. She subscribes to several and the nursing home has many sitting in all common spaces. She still loves looking at recipes, event though she hasn't cooked in years.
We are not very concerned that she isn't very active when she is alone. The NH has several activities every day, and she is willing to go to almost any of them. If she does a "sport" activity that includes light exercise in the morning and plays bingo in the afternoon that is probably enough stimulation for her. And she has at least four family visitors each week. We color or sort coins or read magazines and the newspaper or take her for wheelchair walks.
Beckyl, I'm afraid sunnygirl1 is right. There does come a time when it may not be practical to expect a person with dementia to entertain herself. I think the best option is making sure there are other people in her life to see to it that she gets some activity and stimulation each day. Don't worry that she is not entertained all of her waking hours.
Leaving a person who has dementia alone with hopes that they will entertain themselves is just quite speculative. Unless they are in the early stage, then they have a hard time amusing or occupying themselves with activities. I think many watch tv, but after a while they don't get much from it. Maybe others will have more ideas for you.
One thing that works is having a person talk to them and engage them in an activity, but having them to it for themselves may not work that well. This has been my experience. I provided color pencils, books, cards, tv's, movies, magazines, etc., but none of them worked well.
Do you have an adult care program that she could go to? That seems to work really well.