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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Eating alone can be depressing. Also, she could be depressed already, and maybe doesn't want to eat. You could try Meals on Wheels (local senior services). They not only deliver a meal, they are trained to visit and keep an eye out for the elder.
Many elders insist they want to remain on their own, but would actually thrive in assisted living, or by having in-home care for a few hours a day. This gives them a social outlet and in AL, they have meals prepared and people to eat with.
Absent outside help, you could try making sure she has easily prepared meals ready to go. She's not likely to cook for herself. Good luck. This is very common. Carol
Thank you carol, we have actually decided that mom might be better coming to live with us, I will better be able to help her and keep her on her meds plus be sure of what she is eating. Her dialysis nurse also got her into the social worker who will be seeing her weekly. I feel like things are going to be better. Thank you
My mom doesn't want to eat anymore due to her delusion of being constipated... I have a caregiver that comes in 4 days a week and I come on the weekends and weeknights to kinda make sure as well.
I kind of relate it to when we raised our children. If they ate one good meal a day, we didn't worry so much. My mother lives with us and most of the time she has a great appetite. But, some days she doesn't and on those days, if she eats that one meal, I feel like she will be okay. Also, my mother has AD and if you ask her if she's hungry, she might say no, but then she may eat a lot. Since you are thinking of moving her in with you, she will probably have a better appetite, because she won't be eating alone.
heymomz, You say that WE decided mom would be better off living with you. Did you mean you and your mom both decided this would be the best solution? If mom was not included in making that decision I would encourage you to reconsider. Change is a lot more difficult for us older folks than most younger people realize. If depression is the root cause of her not eating well, then being forced to change her daily routine may open up a whole new can of worms that neither of you would want to have for lunch.
My mom has no sense of time and when you tell her it's time to eat, she says she just did, even though it was hours ago. Memory loss is a big factor in why elderly don't eat. Another is not having someone to share the meal with. And some like my mom, can no longer fix a meal or know that it is time to eat. Have plenty of her snacks ready and available for her. If she doesn't have to think about the preparation, it might make her feel more like eating. You may be right to move her in with you at this point.
I would really encourage you to make something you know she likes... and go eat with her. Eating alone is rather sad and she may just not feel hungry. Think about getting some meals delivered to her, she would be more prone to eating if it is already prepared... take care, J
When my mother lived at home by herself we got her Meals on Wheels. At first it worked but then I would go over and see lots of meals still in the frig that should have already been eaten. She would just forget to eat!!! Plus as much as I complained the food selection was very limited to what they served....I would buy her cooked chickens and she just wouldn't even see it in the frig......I ended up throwing away more food than she ate........Now she lives in a ALF and sometimes tells me that she hasn't eaten in days???? She just doesn't remember anymore......I guess its just part of the dementia!!
Having your Mom move in with you is commendable however please schedule regular time away for yourself so she doesn't get to dependent on you for everything and you burn out like so many of us have done. Good luck to you :)
My mom eats less frequently than she use to and I think it is because her sense of smell and taste are going away as she gets older. When she does eat the main think she likes is sweets because she seems to be able to taste it but other foods have to be very spicy or strong for her to taste it. Another words it no longer tastes good so why eat.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Many elders insist they want to remain on their own, but would actually thrive in assisted living, or by having in-home care for a few hours a day. This gives them a social outlet and in AL, they have meals prepared and people to eat with.
Absent outside help, you could try making sure she has easily prepared meals ready to go. She's not likely to cook for herself.
Good luck. This is very common.
Carol
Thank you
You say that WE decided mom would be better off living with you.
Did you mean you and your mom both decided this would be the best solution? If mom was not included in making that decision I would encourage you to reconsider. Change is a lot more difficult for us older folks than most younger people realize. If depression is the root cause of her not eating well, then being forced to change her daily routine may open up a whole new can of worms that neither of you would want to have for lunch.