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Her short term memory is very poor, and when she had a similar surgery a year ago, it was almost impossible to keep her lying down for any length of time. I am wondering if there is anyone out there who has dealt with a similar situation & has any tips or advice. I am also contacting her primary care physician about any medication that may help. Thanks!

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You'd have to sedate your loved one with dementia in order to get her to lie still for several hours, I'm afraid. I would avoid the surgery unless it was 100% necessary for her survival or to keep her eyesight preserved. It may be difficult to get her doctor to agree to 'knock her out' for several hours also, since that will make her a 'fall risk' if she tries to get up. It's a catch-22 really. If this surgery has to happen, I'd be sure to have someone stay with her afterward for the entire night until the next morning.

Good luck!
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May need sedation rather than a local.

Any special needs the patient has, including behaviour due to dementia should be discussed with the surgeon/specialist & factored in.

Have seen other day procedures like dental surgery, cataracts, colonoscopy, gastroscopy done as in-patient rather than day patients if the patient's special needs warrant it.
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Thank you for your input. After taking a year to evaluate it, I do feel that it is 100% necessary, and she is definitely very clear that she wants the surgery. I will be staying with her post surgery to make sure that she understands what she needs to do, and I’m going to do my best to help her remember that she needs to lie down. Thankfully, she’s very cooperative, it’s just that she has trouble remembering instructions longer than five minutes.
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Thank you everyone for your advice and tips. I wanted to circle back around and report on how things went. Thankfully, her surgery and after care went very well. It ended up that she only had to lay still with restraints at the surgery center for an hour after the surgery, and I was able to sit with her. After we went to the hotel with orders to lay on her back for the rest of the day, I turned down the air-conditioning so it was chilly and came prepared with a stack of blankets. She wondered why it was so cold but she had no desire to get out of the bed! We basically just laid in the bed together and talked and she napped quite a bit. Everyone had some really good suggestions! I appreciate you taking the time to help.
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againx100 Feb 2022
Glad it worked out so well. That AC idea was brilliant!
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Sounds pretty much impossible. How old is she? Does she want the surgery? Do you think it is necessary?
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All depends in the patient's age and life expectancy. Surgery of any type and anesthesia implies risks. Please tell us the age of the patient, the overall physical condition, other illnesses, her mental status and type of surgery. You said that last year she had surgery and she would not cooperate with the post-operation rest. So far, this will be my opinion, if the surgery is not absolute necessary, I would skip it. She will not cooperate with the post-op instructions. Sedation after the surgery might be risky.
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Thank you all for your answers. She’s 85 and still has full processing & reasoning capability; it’s just her short term memories are affected. She’s “herself,” but she usually doesn’t remember conversations from one day to the next. We took a year after the first surgery to evaluate going forward with the second surgery. I feel very certain that I am honoring her wishes to have this second surgery. If she does not have the surgery, she will continue to lose her vision and become legally blind. Her vision as it stands now is barely enough for her to function, and increasing blindness would add another level of complication to her future care decisions. Also, the surgery center understands her issues and is going to assist us in keeping her still for the first four hours after the surgery. Even though she had trouble remembering to lie down after the last surgery, her procedure was still successful, so I’m hopeful that will be the case this time. I am also contacting her primary care physician about any medication that may be safe for her to take that might assist in her being relaxed and wanting to lie still for a few hours afterwards. I appreciate your input & advice!
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@ CAR223: This is a long shot but the first thing I thought of, since you are speaking of a woman who presumably, when younger, occasionally had manicures and pedicures: maybe her muscle-memory could help her stay still if she is being given (or if she thinks she’s being given) a mani-pedi post-op.

Could you semi-trick your aunt into laying prone for a long time by bringing lotions, emery board, cuticle pusher, little bowl to dip her fingers in with liquid cuticle softener, and nail buffer, and clear shellac or a pretty color nail polish, and work on her hands and feet as soon as she gets restless post-op and wants to get up?

If you massage her hands and feet with lotion, use emery board, pretend to use nail polish etc I bet you can convince her she needs to stay still until the shellac dries…like you have to move not at all, or very carefully in real life after a mani-pedi.

Maybe you can stretch out her supposed beauty treatments for a long time without her getting antsy. She might actually enjoy the pamperment, too.

Good luck with this tough situation!
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CAR223 Feb 2022
Thank you! What a great idea!
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She should have someone with her and something to help her relax. As this medication will last easily four to six hours she will require someone with her for that amount of time. Speak with the doctor about this; surely they are doing surgery on others with this condition. They will be your best guide I would bet. Best of luck to her with this.
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